Feeling stuck and lost in life? Five reasons why it’s a great place to be in!

If you’re reading this with some indifference and don’t feel inclined to hear what’s about to come next, then odds are that your life has lost sparkle and you don’t think of yourself as good enough to thrive or at least start from timidly flat to something more exciting!!

Does this mean no “sweet spotsfor you ?

Yup! You certainly are stuck somewhere in life or at work.

That’s nothing strange; to find asking yourself if this is how you’d imagined your life; if this was the kinda job you really wanted. You are feeling low, restless with nothing to wink at; all sad and alone in your world. But then it’s Ok to be like that! This is your moment to gather your wits and push forward. Besides it’s nearly an universal experience . We all get our share of anguish of being alone and glued to the past once in a while. Career, relationship or even what’s coming next! – most people do get frozen at some point or the other!

Image source: Getty images.

So, what being stuck looks like! How’d you know life‘s been mugging you? Wouldn’t something new – a new job, relationship or tweaked health for instance, put you in the stride and shine up your life?

For me being stuck and feeling peevish means really wanting something and then losing the motivation to get it! It’s like you put your finger onto something that looks exciting and then you talk yourself out of it. It would also mean endlessly thinking about what could be better or different; if it could be done in a more gainful way .

If you’re mired in any of these; it seems indecision, worry and over thinking has robbed you of everything terrific and likable in life. In fact life has lost all sheen for you.

The truth about being stuck

Being stuck is like quicksand. The more you try to get out, the deeper you sink. Your insecurity is on overdrive and asking your mind to push, control and manipulate. You just want to feel secure, loved, appear remarkable and admired everywhere. You think that if you could control everything, all would be swell. But it’s not until the reality hits you right in the face that misadventure happens for you. You get stuck because you think you should be something you are not and when you think life ought to be different than it is.

What of me! At times when I feel truly stuck, I write.

As I write this, I find myself in a stuck period as well since the last few months. But I don’t cry foul!  I struggle less because I’ve learned to let it be. I try not to do something silly when words like “should,” ”have to,” or ”must” fluster me. When I relax and surrender to the quietness of life, things seem okay. Restless!…I see I can’t control life. I can only notice things what life brings to me.

Feature credits: ‘ 10 Things To Remember When You’re Feeling Stuck In Life’ by The Law Of Attraction in youtube,com on Jul.28, 2016.

Being stuck sometimes is all about growing naturally. It’s the time when not much happens when you think it should. These are the moments when you begin to grind yourself to come up with ideas to make things happen.

And when you couldn’t get anywhere, I call it being stuck!

Let’s find you a happy place

Remembering good ol’ days is harmless but becoming stuck there completely? That’s an entirely different story. This means you don’t feel inspired and find it difficult to get excited about things that used to earlier!

Maybe you’re ghosting a failed relationship; maybe you haven’t forgiven yourself for something awful of your past. You’re continually going over that and wondering if you could have done things differently. Maybe you’re holding onto something terrible from your childhood that doesn’t serve you.

Or maybe something else….

Regardless of how you are stuck, you at least earn yourself the agony of not enjoying your present! And that’s awful and sad!

So, why does this happens in the first place?

Missing amour proper, sinking self worth, clueless and FOMO; all are the core reasons why people feel stuck. Unhappy with present life, nerves raw and taught over some issue or perhaps fearful of future…any or all may stand in your way to be more comfortable, safe and predictable!

If you suspect that you’ve cronied your past long enough to be anything but comfortable, these five mindful tips could help you to climb out of the slump and start moving forward again!

Image source: Getty images.

Dismiss the noise

You can hardly miss this one. It’s silent; its impact powerful and it’s savage enough to keep you stuck in the same place. I often see people who have surrendered to this dear emotion willingly; the voices that they allow in and let them collide with their judgment. It could be your mom’s who loves you dearly but won’t want you to risk anything for something; it might be a dear friend who with all good intents steers you away from a great opportunity because he doesn’t want to see you fail.

Sometimes we let the voices of the people we love and care about, impact our choices. And it’s Ok!…so long as you can decide which one matters most in the situation before you let it sink in; what voices are going to help you get unstuck and which one would make you go bust. Ignoring those who love you most and could help you get you unstuck fast, though is the worst mistake you could ever make.

It’s a weird world out there and they are your best options to ride through safely.

So, simply choose carefully how much you should weigh their thoughts and opinion. Filter out what doesn’t serve right away and hang on to the voice that does!

Change your mind about anything and everything

Standing at the base of the mountain you’re about to climb and looking upwards…that looks formidable but only until you’re half way up. Looking down then doesn’t seem that disastrous. Your perspective changes and suddenly you’re excited about having won half the battle.

When feeling stuck, something close to this happens; your perspective gets stuck. You may be assessing and trying to salvage something from your past experiences, but sometimes you just couldn’t do much to give it a new look; the fear of failing the heights is frightening! You’re easily scared to hell to experiment!

But what if you chose to dig in instead of being a dead meat and try to learn of something new? The moment you begin to think differently, the stuck feeling begins to fade. It doesn’t melt altogether, but it starts to feel soft and yielding.

And now you can figure out what to do next!

Those nightmares are dreadful!

Unease and the shakes are all part of growing up normally. But being buried in them for long, isn’t. So when you’re uncertain and fear the unknown- take a moment off, breathe in long and sift through the snag. Search, what’s causing the sulk? Is it real or some phantom playing in your head? Is it actually trying to tell you something?

Fear, for most of us works like a catalyst. It startles our intuition awake when it’s time to take action; when we need to do something we haven’t done before or in a long time and we sense that something better lies out there. All we need is to go to the other side and find it.

So, what if instead of stepping back from fear, you walk towards it and push through? Take control of your worst nightmares for they are the one who have held you back. Once you do that all those moments of screwed up craziness –so dismissive or cruel– wouldn’t dare mock you. Suddenly you won’t be feeling valley low any longer!

And when that happens; you are all prepped to define yourself once again.

Isn’t that what you were looking for in the first place?

Talking to someone you love, helps

At one time or the other, we all get stuck and it doesn’t help either to know that this will not be the last time. So whenever your present freezes in your past and everything sucks…try talking to someone who loves you; not just anyone, but someone who’s close to heart. No one else would give an earful or could provide a safe space for you.

Being seen, heard and understood is something we all would die for; only an adoring admirer could remind you of your strengths and dreams.

We are tempted to change tracks in our stuck today when someone we love, looks us in the eye and shares and celebrates our dreams. It’s then the haze lifts and the picture of what lies ahead begins to take shape.

Hold tight and think easy

That will give you some more room to grow!

We all want good times, sunny successes and happy relationships to come easy even when we all know that that’s not entirely true. Dismay and chagrin usually fluster our attempts to be happy all the times. So, instead of wondering why things happen with difficulty, learning how to overcome them, matters! Nothing worthwhile comes without a struggle and you can gain so much wisdom in trying times than in ease!

See…It is the edge of our discomfort zone that lets us find our greatness.

And don’t forget… every failure is a lesson and every mistake a moment to learn!! 

Image source: Getty images.

Like I said, we look to others to help us get unstuck, but search yourself!…isn’t that a complete waste of time? The only person who can liberate you –is you. Even when the empathy and generosity of others feels like a gift, the action for the win – all starts with us. No one else but you have to do the works to light up your life.

So, sit back, take a hard look at what’s making you feel grounded and promise to push yourself no matter what!

Believe me –stuck is a good place to be in, for it gets you to know that there is something better on the other side!!

It’s monstrosity! More than half my body is not human and I’m a walking Zoo!!

Image source: ‘Bacteria: The miracle microbes that could fix planet’ by Collin Barras in sciencefocus.com on Sep.02,2020,

This is freakin’ crazy!…Am I more microbe than human and never alone?  Is it really freak’n true? Sounds nuts!…. but I think I did read somewhat on these lines in my graduation; like human cells make up only 43 percent of body’s total cell count and the rest are microscopic colonists; our cells are outnumbered by 10 to one…blah-blah-blah whatever. It’s creepy, but understanding the other half of our selves might be the key to even stranger mysteries!

“Why, our body isn’t just us and never alone? Why genetically we are more outgunned than believed? What it means to be “human” if we are only half of what we really are?

From simple allergies to spooky Parkinson’s, every nook and cranny of our lives is hostage to these teeny-weeny nano-sized creatures. And we just couldn’t get rid of them, no matter how well we wash ourselves. Every crevice, every fissure and every chink on our bodies is swarming with these intrepid life forms.

We live by and stay surrounded by these tiny suckers even when we cannot see them with naked eyes. And….they are everywhere; on our keyboard, on our pillows on our favorite chair,stuff and above all, inside us!

The smallest living organisms ever known, some live on us and some within us. And know what, it’s considered Ok! So long as these critters are inclined and obliging, we could stay healthy, but once tables turn and a microbiome shift happens, our bodies become a battleground of sorts.

Do you have any idea why these bugs live in our body? Are there any hostile micro biomes too? What are those 20 odd million microbial genes doing in our body? In fact who lives most on our bodies?

A ghost safari to the battleground!

Our body is an enormous ecosystem hosting different biomes swarming with microbes and helps them flourish. Many of these invisible warriors are good for our health. Not only that; this army from microbial mecca abets droves of viruses, fungi and archaea (a kind of single cell organism) living within us as well. Together, they uphold the key to a longer flourishing life for us!

So if you thought you were some kind of epitome of sterility, think again. Your gut is home to some of the smuttiest of pathogens and your skin, mouth, lungs and even genitals shelter their diverse communities. The biggest of these rhyme zones lies deep in murky depths of your colon where trillions inhabit in union with their surroundings. Here they break down dietary fiber, produce crucial nutrients like butyrate and keep your gut up, clean and healthy 24/7.

Always in a curiously creepy relationship, these teeming pathogens have peacefully evolved over the time and have been our most lovable companion ever since, executing all important role in rallying digestion and shoring up our immune system.

Feature credits: ‘ Nearly half of you is not human, it’s made of microbes’ by Hashim Al-Ghaili in youtube.com on Jul.04, 2020.

Living with an attitude!

There are lots of places on our body for them to live. It’s like a jungle to them. Right from skin and tooth, nostrils and tongue, tonsils and lungs and belly button to dark corners of your gut and genitalia; it’s a home to every one of them!

Many species live in harmony live with us and within us and promote health. For instance our gastrointestinal health is right in their hands. Any dysbiosis or slightest shift in the gut microbiome and all hell breaks loose.

And guess what? …this is true for other areas of your body as well.

This is where it gets confusing

An over indulgence into burgers and chocolates in all likelihood affects your risk of obesity and the type of microbes that grow in your gut. So how would you know if it is a bad mix of bugs breaking down and soaking up your food and wouldn’t add inches to your belly?

Seriously; nobody has the right answers to this. “Bugs for Drugsmight take some time to happen. Till then if you’re really interested in finding out what haunts your belly and bowels, a microbiome test (Ohmygut®) test might get an overview of who you’re living with. If you could follow personalized food recommendations, this might of some help in enhancing your microbial well being!

 But then there are lots of places in you for bugs to live and thrive in….

Image source: ‘Bacteria on green background. Prokaryotic microorganisms. Bacillus. Illustration’ in unsplash.com.

And I thought I was pristine and clean!

The bugs on my skin

Good ol’ skin or the integument is home to some meaningful bugs that protect us from invaders and marauders amongst them and support our immune system. Some produce molecules to drive off potentially harmful microbes from colonizing the skin making it a physical barrier. A few others like Staphylococcus epidermis produce anti microbial compounds to stave off something serious like skin cancer. Acne linked bacteria however don’t help much.

My eyes don’t shine alone

Like skin, eyes do not fare any better when it comes trading benefits. An ideal habitat, microbes find comfort in my cornea and the tissue on the inside of the eyelid. Relatively small, any imbalance in this microbiome results in dry eye disease and endophthalmitis or bacterial conjunctivitis.

I could smell them!

Dark warm and damp,my nose is just the perfect place for microbes and is very sensitive to faltering microbial homestead. Shaped by different factors just like gut bugs, nose microbiome is re-engineered by changing environment of the host and is affected by medical conditions. Dysbiosis here could be the reason why asthma, chronic rhinosinusitis, influenza, and bronchiolitis happen headlong and yet are curable with certitude.

Keepers to my tonsils

Tonsils, when invaded by stray bugs-fight infection by trapping assaulting microbes that enter through mouth or nasal passage and producing antibodies to kill them. A diverse ecosystem of microbes at their disposal helps them do this job. Adenotonsilla microbiome may have different contagions for children and adults; but why it couldn’t ward off bacterial tonsillitis, is yet to be discovered.

Wax, bugs and infections- my ear is home to each one of them

The middle ear is a safe haven to a diverse community of thriving microbes which when out of buggy could wreak havoc in ear; infections, inflammations and other hard pushed complaints. Both genetics and microbiome could add considerably to the risk of middle ear infections and consequential painful days.

But what happens inside me is more bewildering!…

Lots happening here!

Right from my school days, I’ve been stuck up with some good dental hygiene regimen. I brush twice a day…no smells, not hooked to any addictions and I check scrupulously if it smells bad in my mouth before going to bed! Yet at times my belly too groans, sharp pain pangs from toothache would send me into an overdrive and sometimes I get laid with fever from tonsillitis! I’m not spared…And I thought I knew everything about sterility.

But certainly not this!

My mouth is a den to plenty of microbes, some good, some not so good and could explain things like inflammation and tooth decay.

The oral cavity or the muzzle- as geeks call it, is a perfect  territory for microbes to thrive; all warm, moist with an endless source of nutrients pouring in, plus plenty of structures and hiding places to stick to; the tongue, pockets between the gums and teeth and of course the teeth themselves. Let them have fun and Streptococcus mutans would run amok and devastate your ivory while Porphyromonasgingivalis could have your gums bleeding and crying foul!

Sometimes these bugs travel down elsewhere in the body like gut and lungs and when that happens dysbiosis strikes hard.

When it comes to bugs, my breath is no different

Once thought of as a sterile environment, lungs are now known to have their own small microbiome; much smaller than the one that the gut holds because the lungs do not have the same kind of hem or sheathing to adhere to. Rather they ease oxygenation through a surfactant that is designed to facilitate the transfer.

Red flags! It’s time to see an urologist

Like the lungs, bladder too is not as sterile and bacteria-free as I believed it to be. While little is known about the mysteries surrounding microbiome here in urine pouch, there is still no evidence if bugs here could rig out a protective barrier for my health. Visible haematuria, spinal cord compression or progressive neurologic dysfunction, well… these are of particular concern since I wouldn’t know what I’m fighting with; rampaging bugs or some cross purpose therapeutic condition!

Image source: ‘Your body is mostly microbes’ by Tina Hesman Saey in sciencenews.org on Dec.20,2013.

So, next time you get anxious about your well being and have an urge to inspect yourself, start with your belly button; the soft spot. Though there a number of places you could begin with,the center of your stomach could reveal much offhand.

Remember…! “The Incas believed that Cuzco was the navel of the universe”.

For instance, if it smells a bit ripe, it’s the umbilical microbiome –passed on to you with your first breath, that has found itself a  cozy homestead and is likely to stay with you till you live. Weirdly, it could be any or many of the 2368 different species that inhabit your navel, reacting and interacting with your body and not always in battle with it.

It’s incredible to think that the DNA of these superbugs carries more information than it would take literally a ton of DVDs to store for medical accomplishments.

See… didn’t I say, you are never alone in an eerie world of microbes!!...

Good to Whoa! 8 pleasure foods to put brakes on your unhealthy eating- the healthy way!

Are you a fitness freak working for a rawbone or losing sleep over a lean sylphlike waist and seeing no results? What about those crash diets; still no gains?

You’ll probably hit the most success when you junk sin foods from your routine and start your day with healthy foods that do not cut out anything important. What kind of benefits you’re looking at here? Well…these slimming super foods are good at melting away that last inch of belly bloat like whoa…

Some days, you’re a kale smoothie-guzzling, bok choy-chopping freak, while on others you’re drooling over a candy bowl. But adding these incredible foods to your diet, don’t help much in getting toned and tight!

Interestingly…the way our body works is bit confusing. Hunger is what decides for it to holler for energy, but by the time it tells you that, it’s already deficient and gone wild.  That emptiness and growing pangs are in fact it’s last ditch attempt to convince you to eat.

Many of us consume the bulk of our food in two or three large meals a day and go long hours with nothing in between. This reduced–calorie- three- meal plan sounds good but you can’t make your body burn fat any more efficiently than it does of its own! Every core exercise you try isn’t always a do-gooder. Your abs may refuse to grow and your potbelly may just decide not to give up!

So, does this mean that you should stay ahead of the curve and eat even before your belly starts growling? What kinda food would work best? And what if you running short on  time? Is a four-ounce chicken breast, a small baked potato and a jumpy salad good enough to craft you a winsome body?

Hard to tell…Huh!

Sometimes my gut also screams, “feed me nice and good!”; especially on holidays and weekends. Honestly I love vegan food more than anything else but I balance my love for eating plants with need to keep my body equally supplemented, so that something wholesome and nutritious always finds its way into my belly.

If you too are looking for some healthy food without giving up on your winning routine; check out on these eight simple super eats that can thaw away that last bit of your beer belly in 2022!

Here’s the sticky widget though;

While spot-reducing belly fat is not exactly possible, eating fewer calories than you burn might earn you an overall weight loss—and that includes your belly.

But what the heck!… consider this as your go-to list for good health; at least.

Roasted   mushroom and bean soup.

Image source: ‘White bean and roasted mushroom soup recipe’ by Amy Johnson in shewearsmanyhats.com.

This white bean and roasted mushroom soup- an ageless classic- has ruled the charts on She Wears Many Hats ever since originally published in October 2011. The magical partying of pureed white beans and broth base instead of cream and roasted onions, garlic and herbs, is a guilt free gratification for those chasing a simple  wholesome stuff!

I don’t think anything else could warm you more than this savory, drool-inducing tang of this consommé.

And it’s so very worth it. Served alongside a simple salad with crusty bread, it makes for a perfect day. Looking for a vegetarian version? Simply swap veggies broth with chicken one. Bonus here!…You also get to substitute one part to three of dried herbs as you head into colder months when seasonings are hard to get by.

Black Bean Omelet

Image source: ‘Black Bean Omelets with Salsa Verde’ in goya.com.

Coffee sure does perk you up in the morning. But if you pair it with sugary cereal, bagels, or donuts, you’re very likely to stay starry eyed and listless for the rest of the day. These empty carbs taste good on the tongue, but do little for your body. Instead fill your morning meal with some healthy complex alternative that would leave you feeling energized!

Simply put, it’s all about picking a high protein fiber packed food that would promise good nutrients to your body.

I begin my day with a wholesome breakfast; be it the one that’s on-the-go list for rush days or a more relaxed oversized gut bomb for weekend brunch. Which would you prefer; a pricey spinach omelet, packing nearly 1000 cals or a simple affordable 330 cals high protein, fiber packed omelet sandwiching black beans and cheese? 

A black bean omelet is sure to make you feel satisfied and keep you full for hours. The soluble fiber helps lower your cholesterol, keep you regular and set your taste buds a –jingling! Refried black beans set off by chunks of ripe fried tomatoes, savory onions and cilantro, leave one smacking good after-taste that would have you wanting more of it.

Try it! Your palate will thank you.

Grilled Chicken Pineapple Sandwich

Image source: ‘Teriyaki Chicken Sandwich’ by Shelly in frugalfamilyhome.com.

This grilled chicken and pineapple sandwich is your best bet if you are a health freak. Not even the healthy genre of grilled sandwiches that beckon you invitingly each time you pass by the neighborhood rotisserie, are a close match to it.

Packing a mouth watering punch in every bite, this sandwich is a sweet-spicy combination of teriyaki glazed chicken, juicy grilled pineapple, fiery jalapenos and is a great reduction in your days’ saturated fat and sodium intake. An end to all flattering chicken sandwiches, this one with 400 cals and 640 mg of sodium gets you the best of both the worlds; a little sweet here a little spicy there! The sandwich with a whole wheat bun comes to you super balanced with lean proteins and high fiber carbs.

Trust me; take a shot and surely you won’t miss the fried version at all once you sink your teeth into this blast of flavors.  

Chicken Tikka Masala

Image source: ‘Authentic chicken tikka masala recipe’ in nishkitchen.com.

Traditionally cooked in clay tandoor and then served in a subtly spiced tomato cream sauce with a dash of dried herbs, coconut milk, ginger and lemon and greek yogurt; this marinated boneless chicken dish is an absolute belter and is a popular fare in curry houses from right across the East End bistros of “Curry Lane” in London to Cumins in Chicago,Indigoin Budapest to Le Palaise de Raja Maharaja” at rue d’Ouessant Paris. This all time fan-favorite is a must dig for diners all across South and South East Asia.

The creamy spicy sauce made with Greek yogurt instead of full fat cream, is insanely good and the soft marinated chicken tastes just divine! The meal gets complete with some turmeric rice and fresh naan.

It’s simply… cozy , fabulous and finger lickin’ good!

Grilled Caesar Salad

This perhaps is the most misleading food; it’s kinda dish that you order when you want to go easy with your food, only to find out that you have ended up eating almost half of your day’s calories in one serve!

Feature credits: Kitchenstories.com

A classic eat, this salad boasts of a savory combination of crisp romaine (a variety of lettuce), rich and garlicky dressing, crunchy croutons and an enticing pungent tang of Parmesan cheese. High calorie dressing however,transforms into lighter vinaigrette packing an awesome substance, flavor and nutrition of sun dried tomatoes and olives in it. Char- grilled lettuce brings some happy change and perk up everything.

 The salad preps quickly and easily with simple ingredients like boneless and skinless chicken thighs that stay juicy all through and cook quickly.

To think of this as volte-face nutrition!  410 calories, 29 gms fat and 610 mg sodium per serve! What more could you ask for?…

Try it and surely you won’t be digging into anything else anymore!

Rajma Dal

Image source: ‘Rajma masala’ by Kiran Afzal in curiouscuisiniere.com on Dec.12, 2020,

If actionable tips  and cook videos from ‘The Spruce Eats-NY are any cue then this high and hearty red kidney beans curry with a mesmerizing blend of spicy masala, ginger, garlic, chilies and tomatoes is a rustic vegetarian dish that comes cheap, is nutritious, comforting and one satisfying comfort food that could easily humble any menu item any time. A delightful vegetarian curry dish, it savors great over rice and pickled vegetables.

If you’re looking for some indulgent healthilicious  dish that could come together in less than half an hour, this one-pan cook makes for an excellent choice. Served with kachumbar salad and pickle as sides, this 232 calories unsophisticated eat has managed some space in Stock Images and Shutter stock collections too.

Palak Paneer

Another hot favorite among foodies! This mildly flavored super food is super healthy and tastes great when served with a side of basmati rice. The star of the dish is the creamy sauce, which is made out of blanched spinach blended with an amazing medley of spices. Complimenting the sauce are shallow fried cubes of paneer (Indian cottage cheese). The healthy spinach gravy is sautéed with finely balanced curry spices in aromatic ghee to up the ante!

Image source: ‘Palak Paneer’ in awesomecuisine.com.

Simple but irresistible, this dish has the punch to satisfy absolutely all taste buds! If cheese is not on hand or you’re looking for a dairy free option, tofu or veggies like cauliflower or potato will taste just as good. You may even ask for whole yogurt in place of heavy cream for the sauce to make it lighter.

This food may not be totally main stream yet, but there’s one good reason to incorporate this extremely nutrient rich leafy gem into your regular diet. Packed with high levels of carotenoids, Vitamin-C, Vitamin-K, Folic acid, Iron and Calcium, it’s a warehouse to some amazing compounds like lutein ( improves eye health), kaempferol( reduces risk of cancer and chronic diseases) nitrates( promotes heart health), quercetin (wards off infection and inflammations) and zeaxanthin( helpful in impaired vision).

So, next time you get hungry and crave for a scrumptious healthy meal, dig into a warm comforting bowl of spinach paneer curry with equally delicious garlic naan or jeera rice or plain basmati rice. Side of a red onion salad  adds zing to a super delicious hearty happy fill.

Italian Stuffed Artichokes

There is really nothing quite like an artichoke.  Whether you’re eating the hearts as part of an antipasto platter or in a spinach artichoke dip, their flavor is quite unlike any other food.

Image source: ‘italian stuffed artichokes’ in garlicandzest.com.

Tender, herby with perfect amount of zest, stuffed artichoke is  one prebiotic food that helps keep things moving through your gut. Trimmed and stuffed with garlicky breadcrumbs and baked in a buttery lemon and white wine sauce until tender, this super eat is an all time favorite and admired as an interactive food that has a distinct start, middle and an end! Like onions and leeks, artichokes also carry acetate that spurs the fat-burning activity in the body.

Need more of greens and taste? Roast artichoke hearts and asparagus with olive oil, Parmesan cheese, breadcrumbs, and a spritz of lemon. And if you’re any good at experimenting, try stuffing your ‘choke with quinoa, tomatoes and herbs and see some fascinating taste unfold on your platter.

Considering people at all phases of life are under-consuming iron and fiber and proteins and other lesser known serious nutrients, the benefits of cruising through your day with all-natural version eats, goes beyond these eight delightful melt-off foods. There are hundreds of sin food recommendations to cut back on your calorie consumption heavily. But there is no super eat that could increase your lifespan, help you feel full, clear up your complexion, control your cholesterol and reduce your risk for cancer, diabetes and heart disease?

All you could do is to mix and match foods to meet your daily quota without going easy on your weight loss plan.

And you’ll definitely have to let go of that Achilles heel; the one food that you can’t seem to help yourself digging into!

From frown and fight to freeze and flop : Why stress makes empathy go limp?

Image source: ‘People often avoid feeling compassion for others, feel it’s a lot of effort’in keralakaumudi.com on Sep.01, 2021.

On that hot sultry summer afternoon in Kolkata, I found myself running through the ever crowded Howrah railway station, convinced I was about to miss my train this one time.

My anxiety surged at the sight of a long baggage security line. I was about to give up entirely, when luckily a colleague’s brother- he’s some bigwig in there- saw me and ushered me to the front. At that moment I didn’t care how the waiting passengers felt about this privileged treatment. I don’t even remember much about the people I encountered during that nerve wracking afternoon. I was thinking only about catching that damn train and getting home, a thousand miles away.

In short my empathy graph had plummeted as my anxiety feared its worst hit.

Many would explain this episode by linking my jitters to narcissism, but I consider it differently. I find it a clash between apprehensions and sensitivity. Or maybe it’s the fear and shame of failure that overshadowed the disappointment of missing the ride!

Like everybody I too hate to fail, but then I‘ve another skill to call it shots… I have a natural capacity for empathy and I swear it’s not like some fixed trait. My genes might have played some role in here. I think I inherited it through some great combinations of experiences and relationships… childhood care-givers matter most!!

But it isn’t wrong to say that just as the fear of failure mars the motivation to succeed; your compassion also takes a beating when you are burdened with emotions and anxiety. It unconsciously sabotages your chances of success in a variety of ways. If you have a compassionate bend, you might find yourself deluged with emotions of those around you. When they are happy, you are caught up in their joy; when they are sad; you carry their emotional burden too.

But there is something else besides this that might surprise you! High empathy and anxiety have some unforgiving analogy in between. And you cannot trust either of them entirely for your emotional well being.

Here’s to share something about that strange connection between them and few bonus tips to keep an eye on your emotional health;

Feature credits: ‘Offer Empathy’ by Genevieve Chesney in Youtube.com on Jan.30, 2016.

Want to share but don’t know if you’re ready for it!

When you hear the word-empathy, what strikes your mind? Understanding one’s pain? Feeling bad for another person or perhaps giving a shoulder to lean on?

Yup…those are the things that help in times of distress. But what about empathizing with one’s joy? It sounds alien or perhaps absurd; but believe me caring for yourself is about happiness too.

If it’s any comfort to know; our neural responses are more accustomed to feeling one’s pain more than being happy for someone. This is rather more intense when we empathize distress. We cry feeling more about other’s pain than laugh and love feeling happy for someone. We all have this wonderful ability to respond to difficult challenges of others, but react faintly to other’s joy.

So, can we somehow tutor ourselves to be happy for others as well? Would that make this world any better place to live in?

I tried it cautiously hesitant of the outcome, but it did help. I think this might be the choice you should make a head start with!

When someone brings me some news about something good happening in their lives, I hug that person or at least touch his or her arm in an appropriate way. I look the person in the eye and ask everything about the happy event. I share the joy of goodness happening in someone’s life and don’t hold back anything in expressing it. I share the vibes and could almost feel mirth tingle down my neck! I feel happy to see them stoked…

Reaching out to someone in happy times and partaking, helps in conquering your fears. And…it shores up your aplomb as well!

Try me and witness anger, anxiety and disgust giving way to surprise and pride.

Image source: ‘How the Highly Empathetic Can Avoid Absorbing Others’ Stress’ by Jessica Stillman in inc.com.

Being real about how you feel helps!

If I were to judge compassion, I’d say it’s a higher state of awareness. In an empathetic state of mind, I could fully experience the anger and wrath of someone who has been wronged. I could even go beyond feeling sorry for what someone else feels. I simply couldn’t keep my head and heart closed for trouble, indignation and nightmares and prefer to see through the present situation with understanding and love.

When we are in a conflict with someone or face something challenging, owning our fears and insecurity is one great way to move past our defensiveness and take a call on deeper issues of the situation; I’d say, more buckled up.

You may not know, but doing this lets you empathize yourself no less. The more you are willing to imagine what it’s like for them, the more of it you’d be able to experience yourself.

Shell shocked and stewed? Brainstorm your way out of chronic stress

Failure makes us feel both fear and shame. On the brighter side, it preps us to find people whom we can trust and with whom we can share our emotions. Once you will yourself to brainstorm your way out of the heat; relabel and play down your stress and save yourself from vandalizing your sunny side. Besides, reassurance and empathy from others would reinforce your feeling of self-worthwhile.

Getting peevish and judgmental already?… Take a break and for a moment imagine a possible scenario as creepy as this! …

You have lost your job in pandemic and desperately searching for a new one. Yet you ain’t getting it and keep failing in finding it just because you don’t know “the right people,. You are at your wits end and reeling with hard time stress.

If you think you failing to make some ground and are clueless how to go about it; start with some small but powerful choices to hit the frame. Begin by setting up for yourself the goal of expanding your social network. Reach out to everyone you know who might help. Even if they are not in your field and couldn’t do much, they might know someone who could.

See… the cliché’ works well when instead of mourning you put your foot down!

Empathy is all about the ability to feel and reaching out to another person’s emotions and thoughts. It gives meaning to our lives and our relationships. It works well to thaw our emotions out of limbo.

#It might also mean getting a job offer from somebody hitherto stranger to you!

Besides, who would say Nah’ to a decent break from some nerve wracking ‘Fight-or-flight’ episode every time each day?

Feature credits: ‘’ Someone else’s shoes’ by Blythewood SBO in youtube.com on Nov. 11, 2016.

That day in Kolkata, I caught my train. I also learned something. No one wants to live life in a hurry as if they’re always late for a train, too stressed to look around or connect with others. We’re much better off cultivating compassion, rubbing shoulders and accepting that what will be, will be -missing the train journey and all that…

If you were to ask me to explain empathy as I see it; I’d say, ” I know exactly how you feel” Another more jaded one would of course be, ” I know exactly where your shoe pinches most”.

I guess I have learned when to ease off the emotional overwhelm and steer clear of becoming a damaged empath.

All that and more on my own!

Aren’t you tired of wishing you had more? Be careful; there is little difference between your dreams and desires!

Like Drake, sometimes I wish if I could go back in times, not to change anything but to feel couple of things twice! I would want more of this dangerous, jazz-shaped immortality for myself!

Life sucks and it definitely is not a cakewalk. If it were, wouldn’t we all be rich, sipping a classic mimosa on our ocean front property? But even when it’s true that I don’t or ever will own a beach house, doesn’t mean that my some 50-ish years have been hard-only. Loads of little things have inundated my life- improving everyday of it without totally breaking the barriers. From miniature vacuums to bedside night lights to heated lunchboxes, shower liners with handy pockets, and even a shampoo brush to massage my scalp, these endless options haven’t failed me few clever moments of sweet happiness. But the phantom in me, pines for more. There’s this stain remover that works so well on red wine, that I forgot; I think I can hear it calling my name.

Let’s face it; Life isn’t easy and glee and all that; but you know what is?

It’s almost a year since I started to catalogue list of things that I wished I had lots of them in life. I called it ;“Things I wish I had more of them”. I initially came up with some boring things about life, career and relationships; things that I’d learned over the years and gathered from mentors, books, friends and people close to my heart. But later some better stuff filtered in; good choices like love, happiness, contentment trumped everything else.

I created it to remind myself of useful things that mattered; probably more so because it kept my hope alive to relive them someday.

A year later I still read it a few times each day and wait for crazy things to happen!!

What do I wish I haven’t had enough? What could I offer myself back again with what I have learned over the past years? Of course, this is an idea that people play around with in their minds; and quite often realize that an upbeat past has the genius to turn things around for some good in present as well. So, why not wish for it?

Unable to warp back in time? Fear not! You’re not scammed…

If you are someone like me, let me recommend a few out of my own list that I wish for more. It’s Ok if I couldn’t wake up to a wish fulfilled each morning. I know desires have a cranky way to keep you thinking for the rest of your life about an even stranger scenario; you returning back and reliving them.

Image source: ‘Woman leaning on her table’ by Marcus Aurelius in pexels.com

Wish I could do exciting things once again

Funnily; it’s not about success or even remotely about happiness! It’s about doing things that are exciting. In my declining year, I still want to be a 25yr old jaunty good looking beau, gleefully chasing some haute’ damsel from neighborhood. I want us to climb the trees, jump the wall and beat up all the bully boys when feeling pissed off! I want to live my share of one heartbreak, one true love, one success and one moment of despair again. I don’t want the creaking knees or cringing eyes falter me or the loosening skin shame me. I want to be reminded of all the battles that I survived and the ones that I won.

I want me to be excited. I want to be nubile and mercurial. I want to be foxy, short, sweet and crisp; all at the same time!

Could there be anything more desirable than this?

Image source: ‘Old dirty sneakers on tree’ by Chris F. in pexels.com

Wish I had saved more

Like any young boisterous nerd, when young I was quite mindless about money. I did save and invested but I couldn’t manage to hoard it. Not that I was letting the thought pass by me but I had more exciting things crowding my days. I was getting carried away by the whims of the moment. A few simpler things could have made my present more bullish and upbeat. I could have done so much but didn’t pick up; I simply whizzed past in the fast lane!

See…when you are young you ride the wave of youth. You feel you’re gonna stay young forever. Behaving like a teenybopper I too was equally less impressive and less receptive or perhaps more distracted by less meaningful things! I thought the opportunity to save more will keep on endlessly coming and kept on spending the dime on utterly trivial things.

Why don’t we ever listen to a good advice when we are young? Somehow I feel though that I wouldn’t have listened even to my older 50-ish self then.

Today I wish I could travel back in time and save myself the pain, effort and trouble that I was going to earn for myself later.

If you’re in your mid-20’s and reading this, do yourself a favor;  don’t burns the candle at both ends; heed when some good advice heads your way.

Image source: ‘Signboard’ by Monstera in pexels.com.

Wish I had worried less about changing jobs that I didn’t like!

This surely applies to everyone but is more prevalent when you’re a young rookie and Waterloo moment stares you in the face every day of your nine-to-five life. You’re easily intimidated and influenced by peer pressure, authority and roles models expecting you to behave or not behave in a certain way!

Many of my decisions including the one of staying stuck with one job-it hurt most; was influenced largely by the presumption of how it’d look like to others if I did jump the fence and whether everybody would approve of it.

Today, it all reeks of nonsense…

If I couldn’t get out of my fears or shake off influences then, did I miss something important? Have I lose out on living a happy authentic life? Hell no!… but I could have saved myself from endless hours in a dead-end job that failed my purpose and skills.

For the same reason, I admit that being present in the moment with unfulfilled desires is more difficult than when you are in your 20s. You just can’t fathom the value of being present at that age.

#I wish if I were more present then, so many things would have cut fine today!

Image source: ‘Travel items’ by Nataliya Vaitkevich in pexels.com.

Wish I’d read Wayne Dyer earlier or perhaps get to watch Lady Gaga in concert

Years later, I could begin to understand the power of simple intentions only now. I wish I could size myself with Wayne Dyer…Umm! for no particular reason; but living a life of unlimited abundance and getting into your life the right people at the right time; Well…I’ll be damned if I couldn’t pick up the idea; something that I needed  so much when I was young. So much time, energy and money I wasted on things that only clutter and complicate our lives. I wish I had learned to co create my World my way when young.

Gee whiz!!…I could have done more with so much less.

Okay! Perhaps Wayne had not hit the stands then yet and I’m not sure about the latter; maybe she took to stage sometimes in late 1980s or what… I never got the opportunity to read him on the SoNet and neither could I get the chance to see her perform live.

Imagine my 20s!! I couldn’t fathom that they were going to change my life so much later on…

Amid all uncertainties, I wish I ought to have read all the enlightening things being taught in the books then or perhaps seen her perform on screen at least!

Today I watch Lady Gaga getting love from fans for sweet moments with Liza Minnelli at Oscars 2022 on flickering screens. I wish someday I’d get the opportunity to watch her perform live at Dolby’s.

But for now I guess, she‘ll have to stay in my list of should haves.’

Feature credits: ‘ Run!’ by Proper films in Youtube.com on Sep. 02, 2019.

Life is all about what’s happening in the present moment. While we wish, want and dream, our real lives are already happening. For me there has never been anything more terrifying than the prospect of dying out and missing out on all of it, because I have been way too busy wishing what more I wanted instead of appreciating what I have.

I wish…

Someday, if I could ever get to meet my younger self face-to-face, the first thing I’d want to say;Hey, stop worrying. It’s useless. Life will turn out just fine. But you can make it better by following your heart. And know what… everything you hope to feel when you get what you wish for, is with you right here, right now”

If you think that one day you might find yourself saying; “I wish, I had” then by all means do that thing right now! Hopefully you’ll never have to look back for things you wish you had accomplished more.

Trust me; it will pay off so long as you consider your wishes as no more than a little vacuum to clean up your everyday mess!!

Three ways to know if the time is right for a good bye; burning slow doesn’t help!!

From moments of pure bliss to “badass togetherness”, relationships sometimes flinch. Between valleys and peaks, you are never certain whether or not it’s meant to be what it is. Sure you could work around to fix the rough patch somehow. But will that hold? Will everything be the same as before? At what point should you draw the line between rough times and simply giving up?

Or is it time to say enough is enough?

Like everybody else, I could realize the spoil only when it was too late. But  I spared myself the anguish, for I knew it’s never too easy to see it from the inside. Sometimes it’s blindingly true, yet we couldn’t see the red flag or smell the rot.

And surprisingly you couldn’t get to start over again…

Bad things do happen in relationships and the rot might ruin the romance, friendship or just about anything familial. Sometimes it hurts and in your  anger or inconsolable grief you feel like lashing out, cursing or yelling to let the world know how bad the hurt is. You may even get to the state where you want everybody to be hurt no less; to make everybody feel the misery no less.

The edge happens only when you find there’s no time left to reveal your love; to let others  know that over the last few months they made your days a bit brighter and helped you heal better from the hurt that others left behind; that they sank into your heart and stayed put. In the midst of impossible, somehow they became your favorite.

But like good and bad times, there are moments when things begin to get out of control. You are clueless; not sure whether to go with it or away from it. You just can’t hug harder any longer.

If any of these signs are persistently a part of your relationship, you have a serious problem to consider. It might have reached a dead-end and this could be the time to let it go peacefully.

Remember though, every tragic of something is the beginning to a fresh start.

Image source: ‘Sad in railway stock photos and images’in 123rf.com.

When enough is enough

Criticism is good; it gives you an opportunity to find your misplaced positives. But even that has a quota. Negative comments feel cruel and so does one nasty word that can silence a million applause. See…even the SoNet community works the same way; your fans may have cheered you a thousand times but you’d only remember one single message that tried to run you down.

However, if someone in your life always jumps in to say something about your wins all the time, you have a red flag there too!

I say… life sucks! but that’s how it is.

If criticism and negative comments begin to corner your attention… you need a deeper look into what’s happening around. Is getting out of a messy relationship worth the anguish of parting ways? Sometimes it gets dismissive but severing ties peacefully is more impactful than inflicting emotional damage on yourself.

See…there is a pattern of narcissism specific to each one of us. But even that doesn’t work right all the time. If somebody keeps pushing you constantly and tells you that it’s for your own good so that you may improve; don’t jump for it. If you fall for it you’ll always be looking for doses of approval from others which will never come even if you gave your 100%. Some may even pin for your attention and time!

Criticism and negative comments lower your energy and distract your attention. If you do not want to turn yourself into a junkie looking only for approval and adoration, allow yourself a course correction. Simply let go of a relationship that has  constrained you all these years.

And remind yourself…you deserve to live free! So, just let go of the decay.

Feature credits: ‘Letter to a Friend’ by Eddie Pinero in youtube.com on Jul.02, 2019.

No crooning or cocktails!

There is never any dearth of time to change your ideas about the future. It’s Ok if you are not where you thought you’d be today- you have many tomorrows ahead of you. But the journey is never straight; you’d sometimes outgrow what you once wanted in your connections. It’d feel  good if you could realize the extent of your responsibility in the context of relationship, today.

This is your journey and yours alone. So, be wary of the people close to you who would not hesitate to throw in your face the things they did for you. They may have lend you a thousand bucks and say that they saved you from penury; more to make you feel wretched than to value kinship.

I know it’s a profound statement and maybe incorrect for some of you; but that’s the truth. If the other person needs to hang the medals for having helped you, it’s time to start over afresh. You can’t turn back the clock or delete memories, but you can choose to live quietly  in present.

So, it’s time you bid adieu!

Image source: ‘Here Is How You Say Goodbye To Your Forever Person’ by Ariel Quinn in herway.net on Mar.01, 2022.

In the hustle and bustle, trust walks off

When the bad outweighs the good, it usually means hard times have arrived and are likely to stay for a while. If you can’t remember the last time you were happy…surely the problem is deeper than meets the eye!

Arguments in a relationship come with a territory. You are sad and neglected and could sense that something is seriously off, yet couldn’t pin point why. You find a pair of hoop earrings that definitely don’t belong to your mate or wake up each morning staring vacantly at the ceiling fan and think, How the hell did I get here?” He’s off to another business trip or you come home to an eerie silence everyday; your phone used to ring off the hook and now all you hear is crickets! You hang in there hoping things to turn around somehow. But with explosive fights, mascara running down the cheeks duels, you know something terrible is waiting to happen.

Essentially, you both have morphed into nasty dinosaurs for each other. You may try to convince yourself that what matters is to live in here and now; but the truth is more savage- you just cannot hide from it.

So, when at the end of the day as you lie down and pat yourself, “Wow! We made it a day without fighting,”, it’s time to get out of the fracas.

Don’t be blind to the obvious and wait to get your heart pummeled. It’s time to dump those dingy rose colored glasses and get yourself a terrific new pair.

Believe me…if you can’t stay civil on vacation in a gorgeous hotel with gorgeous spreads and cocktails and room service…it’s time to say quits.

Image source: ‘Why is it so hard to say goodbye?’ by Richard in richardcollison.net on Oct.22, 2017.

Many times you’d be tempted to make excuses and stay put in a relationship that has reached its expiration. You keep on hitting the reboot button, frantically hoping that everything will be Ok again. This continues to happen until the next time when the not so funny emotional roller coaster starts all over again. Eventually it’s a Joe No-Show and you could feel the cold feet. This means that both of you have flaked out and lost each other for good.

You may not be ready to face it…but that’s fear talking. Don’t let it rule your life. So listen to your instincts, trust your guts and stop working for a relationship that has jumped the fence. It’s time to admit that your future with the other person isn’t on the radar.

Should this happen, start taking care of you and break into a happier life. Value your needs, wants, and most importantly, yourself. Without depleting yourself, step out into a life that you truly deserve. Think of yourself twenty or thirty years from now and merit yourself by doing the right thing.

Above all stay away from people who will sooner or later leave you stranded.

Trust me, your future will thank you!!

Cry, forgive and learn to let go these five things to live a happy life!!

Are you in despair and unhappy? It’s possible that your past mistakes may have caught up with your thoughts and somehow messed with your happiness. The key to understanding why you’re upset in the first place and couldn’t be happier- lies with you!

Image source: ‘Happiness’ by Justina Daugelaite in reachingout.eu.

Don’t we all spend one helluva time thinking about what we need to be happy? Do we ever think what holds us back when we believe we have done enough for some life changing tomorrow?

Honestly…changing life for some good is not that easy. We learn every day and take each day with a grain of salt to make space for a brighter tomorrow.

This isn’t about that though, is it? Clearly not…I’d wager it doesn’t end up nicely all the time.

An irrational hunt for happiness has been waging for decades in true sense and the rage is yet to die down. Even Roger Hargreaves in his 1971 rhetoric Mr Happy’ with all his hippy dippy wellbeing ideas couldn’t get any close to being relief to more modern ideas about mid-life burnout and the gut wrenching resignation syndrome!!

When young, I had learned an easy way to guard myself; I pretended –I don’t care and because I wouldn’t, nothing would hurt me. To me, it was simple game plan and it worked so well; sadly if only for a short period of time. In exchange, I gave up all hope of building some meaningful relationships, warmth and few fine moments of euphoria.

In college I wasn’t any close to camaraderie either; almost no friends. I never went to parties or would hustle to catch up for coffees with campus buddies.

Of course that hurt. Deep within I desperately longed for the college life that you’d see splashed across billboards or experience in some smug misty-eyed soap channel. But the thought of putting out and possible snub was just overwhelming.

So, I convinced myself- I have no time for friends.

I was bitter, angry and sometimes resented everyone and everything; but at least I spared myself any rebuff.

Fortunately, as I grew up I learned to open up and face myself. Yup! it did hurt sometimes. It’s never fun to judge yourself.

But you know what? Today, it feels better than the other alternative; settling for a life half lived!

If you have read me this far, it’s possible that your moonlight happiness story has got lost somehow. You’re caught in a web of your past mistakes or maybe you’ve been giving more brains than brawl to your past and have wrecked your present as a consequence.

Whatever…

Isn’t it time to stop living adrift? How else could you ever hope to be happy again, if you can’t let go of what’s already happened?

If you ask me, life is both beautiful and ugly and we all get to choose how we want to spend it. Many of us make things way more complicated and usually crash out than live it in a simple way. Yet there are those too who endure each day with a happy sunshine view on life.

And so could you; only if you know how to look forward to improve your life!

Here are a few simple-yet powerful things; not judgment, toxicity, perfection, gossip, grudges or excuses; the usual trivia-  that you need to let go right away, if  you want to  reward yourself;

Create some free space for joy and happiness

Image source: ‘Woman with open arms’ by Emma Peneder in unsplash.com.

Happiness comes from living true to yourself.  Sure, we all make mistakes and stumble and fumble, but then life is far from perfect. It’s comforting if you play it by your own rules and not the one pieced together by others.

When we spend too much time wondering and thinking about other’s lives, we lose sight of all that that matters to us. Instead of living for our hopes and dreams, we start following someone else’s play book. This slowly becomes a plucky gamble; one that you can never hope to win.

So, look around, let others inspire you but when you feel that you are beginning to lose yourself, it’s time to let go…that clammy endless collating.

Renew and get rid of the rascal in you

Image source: ‘Floating green leaf plant’ by Ravi Roshan in unsplash.com.

Not that it deliberately blocks happiness from entering our lives when you want it …but it tends to make-believe that everything in life hovers between black and white, right and wrong, good and bad.

I’ve struggled with this wretch and it has earned me only a lot of unnecessary stress and conflict in my life.

#She comes to date tonight, or she doesn’t love me.

#I either succeed today, or I’m a complete jerk.

#You will either support me totally on this, or you don’t trust me.

Do these sound any familiar? I had burrowed myself in cheat stories like these in my ‘I’m hype’ age and it’s something that I lock horns with even today.

But I have learned to respect the duality of life. I make space for it. Today, someone cancels plans and I still love that person unconditionally. I’d fail over and over again in some weird project and yet I’d know I have made progress. I believe in her though I know sometimes I’d get to face some raised eyebrows.

Of course, certain things in life are not there to question but you need to stop jumping to conclusions.

Begin by accepting that every life holds many shades of grey.

Love it or hate it but ditch perfection

Image source : ‘Girl with paint’ by Senjuti Kundu in unsplash.com.

There is hardly anything wrong with self improvement only if you could keep in mind that chase to perfection never ends. In fact, it may even keep you away from happiness and stall you from taking risks. You may miss living life to the fullest.

Perfection to me is nothing short of a huge problem. You set for yourself high banners and grails but you merely rollick between better and the best.

And it reeks of sickness and twisted psyche…. You’ll always feel as if haven’t done enough or maybe you’re not good enough to deliver. This may even stop you from trying anything at all.

We perceive this as something negative…something that destroys our flair and clouds our judgement.

However, I see it differently . I consider this to be my USP for I’ve tried hardest to reach the best. Giving your 100% is kinda celebrating your uniqueness that made you so different.

Once you accept that moving forward is more important than being flawless, you’ll never again be afraid to make mistakes.

Everybody sometimes fail and so would you. So, simply endure. It’s more important that you embrace these mistakes and learn from them than let these mistakes keep you away from trying something at all!

It’s tough to keep everybody happy

Image source: ‘Silhouette of person jumping’ by Mohamed Nohassi in unsplash.com.

It’s natural for us to want people to like us for making them happy. But sometimes it hurts. It prevents us from being happy ourselves. This has a lot to do with our insight about what makes others happy.

You’d say that if people are pleased, they’ll be happy. But it doesn’t work that way always.

Happiness finds way in our life only if and when we want it to. True…we feel it when we succeed in making others happy. But it’s unlikely that the end result is true happiness. It’s tough to keep everybody happy for people have different needs. You might end up making somebody unhappy because of what you did to make someone else happy!

See!…It’s exhausting and stressful when we neglect our own happiness and rank pleasing others above ours.

Not that you should drop caring about others and getting along with them. Making someone smile feels fantastic and could greatly affect your own joy. But incessantly trying to please others usually backfires. So stop gagman theatrics and be your friend first.

Bliss will follow…

Feature credits: ‘Live Your Own Life’ by Eddie Pinero in youtube.com on Nov. 17, 2020.

Piano man with hard habits!

It’s human to believe that one’s always right. That’s even true when it might not be the case. Different values and beliefs is what decide between right and wrong. So when you say you’re right, it might mean that opinion differs.

Of course, it’s hard not to assume that we’re right unless proven otherwise. And to believe that you’re right 100% of the time, sometimes has negative portends. Endless arguments and pointless conflicts don’t prove a thing because there are two sides to every argument. “I don’t know”, say this and you acknowledge that you don’t know everything.

Conflicts would wane when you take this simple huge step in the right direction.

And that’s something, Yup…that will make you feel happier.

It’s never been easy and I’m still learning every day; but for now I can yell a lungful; I’m happier than ever before. I have laid off things that used to make my space crappier and buried the hatchet for good. In return I have earned me a brighter tomorrow.

And I have touched the piano man with a golden heart …

Three simple life hacks that helped me find my Atlas of happiness!

Everybody loves a happy ending, especially when it’s the story of their own life. I have begun writing that ending today. After roughly couple of months in it, lots of scratchy notes and 2000 odd words later I have finally researched my way to be happy forever!!

Image source: ‘7 Simple Ways To Be Happier’ by Seth Symond in lifehack.org.

If you are someone who believes that one doesn’t always need to stay happy and hopeful through difficult times and seriously think that recluse in vulnerable spaces is enough to ease off your discomfort, then it’s time you come out of your therapeutic feel good irrationality!

Imagine yourself 10 years ago. Were you happier or less happy than you are today? It’s not inappropriate if you think that you were happier. But 10 years hence, things are likely to be a lot less rosy. And it’s no fun to rake your brains over it now.

Happiness tends to decline as we walk through our lives and bottoms out at around 50. Then something strange happens; it races uphill again till people get split into two groups; those who get a lot happier and those who couldn’t be any less unhappy.

Right around the“I’m so hype!”age, most of us would rush to make few good financial decisions, plan ahead and are more likely to be able to support themselves in comfort and be alive always; rest who wouldn’t, just couldn’t.

Something similar happens with happiness. As we grow old, we begin to see things differently. The excitement and fun of adolescence gives way to brutally negative jibes of adulthood. By now most of us have experienced bittersweet pleasures of life; but little do we realize that these tiny time specks can make us appreciate more and encourage us to be on cloud nine, when the going gets tough.

Tough!!… is it a bad word? It certainly sounds dismissive and cruel. We all have had our fair share of moments when wits got thrown to wilds. It hurt… but prepped us for some plucky life moments ahead!

­­­If you ask me good things happen more often than the bad ones, but often we miss opportunity to stay connected to happiness. We easily forget that age is like some fabled sycophancy that allows us to fly high in the real World. At 50 you could still be the same adorable pig tailed gal or some jaunty good looking knock-out beau. Both of you could still climb the trees, jump the wall and beat up all the boys. Young and raunchy, fiercely ambitious you both have had your share of one heart break, one breakdown, one true love, one success, one moment of despair and gloom – you have had mountains of them.

Cringing eyes, creaking knees and despairingly loosening skin, need not make you falter now. There is no shame in growing old and struggling a bit; it’s a reminder of all the battles that you have survived and the ones you won!

Once you have learned how to love your lines and folds and aches and pains, begin looking for some honest happy moments, few of which you could save for grey years.

Here’s what I did to make my life stay as full and happy as possible when I reach my later years;

Does age equals happiness?

Image source: ‘This is how to find joy: 4 simple secrets to the good life’ by Eric Barker in theladders.com on Mar.17, 2018.

Like everybody else I too will grow old. But I don’t see myself climbing mountains every day to be happy or live in a landscape where that’s an option. I would rather go for a walk or sit in a stretch of green watching the birds feeding. Doing so would give me something to look forward to each day.

For me the sweetness of doing little or nothing’ is all about savoring the moment , having joy in the present and saving a bit for declining years.

When I was young, the happy–well person in me learned well to accumulate resources and habits in pursuit of happiness. Few of these, like generational wealthso difficult to control, happy childhood-that descended from long lived ancestors and sometimes spots of depression-again a formidable enemy; all have been there to teach me about late-life happiness.  

Elders would mock, “Only handfuls heed; rest count on being lucky!”

I picked that up rather seriously!

I thought that being passionate about something that I could pride later on, won’t hurt anybody. So, I chose the best way of maximizing my chances of being happy in my autumn years.

I have made some big investments in my disposition-smoking, drinking, body weight, exercise, emotional resilience, education, and relationships ranked high in my judgment. I have dug deep, chosen the hackneyed lane and I believe that I’ve done the right thing! To some varying degrees, I have kept all of them under my fold since then.

Surprisingly simple, it’s perhaps the most reliable way to see yourself smiling forever!!

Love doing what makes you happiest

Image source: ‘Being Creative Can Make Your Golden Years More Enjoyable’ by Jim Pietrangelo in healthline.com on Oct. 19, 2017.

It didn’t take me long to realize that the best way I could tweak my chances of happiness, is to pursue that one thing that could make my heart race in high octane. Not that I would let any of dopamine, adrenaline or norepinephrine run out of control.

So, I chose…

One small deed; one overwhelming gesture that when I lock my eyes onto, would make me feel all pumped up; one simple action that would make  me smile every time I looked back.

I strongly willed to improve upon my ability to weather stressful and unexpected turn of events in life. And I chose to pour my heart into it, letting it to be the last! 

Ever since, I have realized that one single most important thing for wellness in life is to raise and foster warm relationships; one that would make you quit small sins; one that you’d have to hold on to if things go south; one that would let you fit the bar pretty well even in a squeaky wrinkled frame.

I’m no die hard biophile. It’s a mean old world and we all have scars but for me happiness is no longer a matter of the heart. I know that I won’t necessarily be doomed to misery if I could work my way to few good, warm relationships.

I just want to be happy and successful. To look back on my life when I’m all old and grey, and think to myself;

“See! I totally nailed it. I have zero regrets.”

Life is surprisingly simple

We hear about success and happiness everywhere we look. We get all sorts of tips and advices about life and about things we should and shouldn’t do.

But it never really works that way every time!

Like most of us, I wasn’t sure what these words actually meant or how to get there. I might already be there and wouldn’t know it yet!

So, I looked around… What could I do to make sure I’m not getting waylaid in my pursuit of happiness? How would I know for sure that I am working towards joy and happiness that right now doesn’t feel tangible?

It’s hard to reconcile everything. Wish for an everlasting happiness and it would usually contradict ways to a successful life. The hard part is that there is no clear answer to this and all those wisdom bombs are only part truth, part value.

I needed to find the right balance for myself.

I took an inventory of all my habits and behavior and judged myself where I needed to invest a little more time, a little more energy and a little more silver to start moving in the right direction. I worked ‘smarter not harder’ so I’d still have some fun left to myself and not be exhausted or miserable when I turn 70s.

I’m no goofball; I’m hopeful and see opportunities differently. I’m sure I’ll find my  perfect grin soon.

Feature credits: ‘The Seed’ by Andy Matthews in youtube.com on Aug. 24, 2017.

As I sit quietly, I reminisce one premier episode of Grey’s Anatomy; normally a few laughs, sometimes some tears; one dialogue in particular that really hit home for me. Somewhere a patient had said something along the lines of;

“Well of course you are happy, but is there really a cap on happiness?

Lately I think I’ve been very happy; maybe I’ve maxed out. But then I remind myself; there is always room for more of happiness… there’s so many miles to go.

I also know that not everyone feels the same way. I see people battling with misery and anxiety every day and this touches me to appreciate my happiness all the more.

All this has drawn an empath in me and I know that everyone deserves to be as happy as I am.

I wish, if only you’d do just one small close to your heart thing, to bring a difference in your World and empower yourself to be happy always.

It’s unlikely that you’ll follow everything that matters and that’s Ok. Just pick and choose the one that sounds easy and worthwhile and take your first step slowly!!

Someday you’ll find yourself lucky… blessed if you may!!

13 foods to try when you are pissed off and want to set something on fire!!

Anger is a nightmare and not without consequences. Many a times we reach out for stuff that does nothing to relieve our hideous mood while we endure. But one thing is certain… anger is something that few of us can control and the rest can count on having major issues dealing with it. To calm down all you’d do is either count till 100 –this does not work for me- or sip on some green tea to save yourself from going back to those peevish emotions.

But yup! … There’s another way out too.

If you are in a snappy mood, yelling and overreacting to anything and everything, then you definitely need to work on your cranky attitude. It’s hard to rationalize but you really aren’t yourself if you are angry and without realizing it neither are your well controlled self.

Hopping mad and hormones in you upping the ante! Between snapping at everyone in sight and angry at the entire world, your stomach rumbles and you get more irritable. Maybe you are hit by Hanger- the ugly-romantic expression for mash up of anger and hunger. Shaking, feeling weak and fatigued, you continue to boil while the fight-and-flight hormone (adrenaline) continues to race through your veins, pushing your mood to limits and making you behave ugly.

This is when even small things feel like the end of the world!

If there is nothing happening outside your body for your irrational behavior, then probably you are not getting enough glucose to your brain and it’s struggling with energy intensive tasks. Your blood sugar has dropped and you are fighting yourself not to flambé your surroundings.

But you are not alone…

As much I hate to admit, I love to think of myself as calm, level headed fellow but deny me food for a few hours and the going gets tough for just about  everything! I have had my fair share of anger management but crying for food? ….everything would fly off the handle. And I ain’t sorry for what I say or do.

This I believe, is the point when extra snacking helps even if the next eat was a while away.

There is a lot in the world that could make you angry, stressed or worried all the time. So, when times get tough and moods tougher, navigate yourself to some squeaky clean food to calm yourself down. A box of donuts or a bag of chips is what you’d jump for, but be wary…they will also quickly push you back into throes of anger.

So, here are a few eats that may not exactly relieve you of incendiary emotions but would help you channel that fuming energy into something blessedly trivial. Besides no matter how cross you are, you still have to eat! Why not something that would ease off your thumping pulse?

Chickpea and pomegranate Greek salad

Fifteen minute prep time and this salad is a go-for meal after a ‘not-so-healthy’ day, when you’re looking for few good things that you couldn’t find in 4 champagne cocktails, cheesy dip or a late night pizza.

There are many smart ways to a pomegranate only if you knew how. Help yourself to a quick, simple almost vegetarian stuff. Of course you’d have preferred something more elaborate, but now with a nasty busy day staring you in the face, you’d better settle for something inane.

Feature credits: ‘Greek Marinated Chickpea Salad’ by Recipe Tin Eats in You tube .com on Jun.03, 2020.

This salad is straightforward enough but the appeal lies in texture. Chickpeas as always are dense and mushy but meaty crunchy cucumbers and pomegranate seeds, creamy salty feta cheese and bright herbs, all woven together in a simple tangy dressing of olive oil and tart red wine vinegar, come to your rescue in fighting off your misery.

Smacked cucumber salad

Image source: ‘Smacked Cucumber in Garlicky Sauce (Suan Mi Pau Huang Gua)’ in blog,seasonwithspice.com.

Wake up your therapeutic feelings by smacking a cucumber into bite-size treat. It’s a delightful salad, right down to its salty, slightly spicy sauce and a perfect food for short outbursts or when you suddenly find yourself about to explode right in the middle of something important.

Lentil and macaroni soup

Image source:’Lentil Soup with Macaroni’ in eatsmarter.com.

Isn’t it exciting and euphoric to clench something tightly in your fists and crush it into tiny bits? One perfect fix for your pent up irritability and you let off some steam in a jiffy! Crushed canned whole tomato soup with tantalizing fresh macaroni pasta with a dash of olive oil is your best spin of the day. Believe me; nothing would better a bowl of this refreshing nourishment. Leftovers would keep well for a few days. Leave out the pasta and you can freeze dry it for quite some time.

Banana-almond-flax smoothie

Image source: ‘Banana almond flaxseed smoothie’ in footprintstofitness.com on Aug.7, 2016.

Is your boss giving you some tempers off late? Somebody close getting onto your nerves? Slurp down some of the hostility on the go with a banana-almond-flax smoothie that works great both to your mental health and your taste buds. Ward off anger and depression with nuts and flax seeds that are good sources of omega-3s.

Greek yogurt with honey and granola

Image source: ‘Greek Yogurt With Honey, Fruit And Granola’ in recipebook.io.

Packing-in a few happy ingredients, this positivity parfait is one easy way to curl up your spooky madness on the go. Friendly probiotics slackening your depression and easing off those buzzing sounds in your head make full fat Greek yogurt a tasty way to fight the blues.  Add a spoonful of honeyed sweetness and you get a punch-up to fight off irritability; in part by reducing inflammation in your brain. Pitch in some berries to score one extra health point!

Quinoa, spinach, and shiitake salad

Image source:’Shiitake Quinoa Salad Recipe’ by Stephanie in iamafoodbog.com.

This super-food-packed salad’s has all the awesome goodness of vegan protein. A complex carbohydrate, it reins in depression and anger by pushing up levels of neuro transmitter serotonin in your brain. Besides the mood-boosting spinach comes loaded with B vitamins. Pair it with mushrooms- a good source of selenium and give a tough fight to anger and depression.

Poached eggs and asparagus

Image source: ‘Poached Eggs With Asparagus And Tomatoes’ in incredibleegg.org.

These stellar protein orbs are any time epic food even for jaded gourmands. A good source of vitamin D, eggs provide mood-boosting vitamin B. Paired with asparagus that contains tryptophan, the combination is an ultimate bite on a cold wintry morning. Frayed tempers, godforsaken tantrums!… increased levels of feel-good serotonin in your brain would do the trick and sizzling arguments would never get past your  plate.

Brown rice and black beans

Image source: ‘Black Beans with Brown Rice’ in tasteofhome.com.

Eating when you’re angry or riding low is usually not recommended. But certain foods have the power to ease anxiety and fight anger. Beans aren’t just good enough for your heart— they work wonders to your brain too. Selenium in them picks you back up when you’re feeling low. Plus, brown rice helps to lift your mood by regulating serotonin levels.

Walnut-miso noodles

Image source : ‘Walnut Miso Noodles Recipe’ by Heidi in 101cookbooks.com.

If you feel like a raging bull, all seething, stormy and blustering; this food is your best bet to keep your frenzy in check. Everything about this dish yells health, happiness and moreish. The whole wheat pasta is a complex carb to nurse your serotonin levels while walnuts come with the punch of Omega-3s to help grapple with your anger and grouchiness.

Whole-wheat pasta with cauliflower and collards

Image source: ‘Sicilian-Style Cauliflower with Whole Wheat Pasta’ in foodnetwork.com.

If you are reeling with anger and frustration, chances are your brain is not getting enough fuel to manage normal cognitive functions. Don’t beat yourself up over some stale cracker or lint covered protein bar. You may have come across touted versions of this dish elsewhere but the one with cauliflower and collard greens is your best cinch.

Generous portions of cauliflower not only make it taste gorgeous but also provide vitamin B-6 and folate.

Chocolate Chia seed pudding

Image source: ‘Chocolate chia pudding’ by Lisa Bryan in downshiftology.com on May 09, 2019.

If you notice people around you are slowly backing up and turning indignant to your mood, it’s likely that your hanger’s ugly head has turned menacing. Not only you are frightening to people around you but also you are vulnerable to mistakes you wouldn’t otherwise!

So, cool off a little with classic scoops of Chia and Chocolate pudding! A more sustaining alternative to standard tapioca, this one is a double whammy food to fix your mood swings.

Chia seeds have all the goodness of depression and anger fighting omega-3s, and dark cocoa powder helps keep bad moods in check.

Coffee with cinnamon

Image source: ’10 reasons you need to add cinnamon to your coffee’ by Heather Fishel in food-hacks.wonderhowto.com on 14 Mar.2016.

No Red Bull for you if you have the urge for a war cry in the thick of a long afternoon. Coffee is a natural stimulant, boosts your energy and perks up the metabolism so you can face the day without berating much. A hot one kicks you alive by raising levels of neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin. And a sprinkle of cinnamon is all it takes to pep up your slurp.

Green tea and honey

Image source: ‘Lemon Honey Green Tea’ in godrej.com.

Angry and hungry!… you’re more likely to pick up  an argument with your sweetheart for no particular reason. Since you may in all likelihood act awkward or be aggressive towards the people you’re closest to, it’s not uncommon that both of you will share the ignominy together.

Green tea is one great source of L-thiamine to relax your mind and sharpen your wits. Sip through a cup of the green stuff at breakfast, before bedtime or… during a brawl break.

Does this all mean that food is the cheeky stuff that could alter your mood and probably back-off your pyromaniac blues? Is it something that we should depend on for our mood swings and anger control? Aren’t we happy enough when we go for pizza or head straight to ice cream buckets and cakes and cheese induced snacks? 

Not to place judgment, I just wish more people would see how detrimental it is to their well being to be hamstrung by anger and not doing enough to let it go.

Not that I’d know anything about them!

 

From Anger to laziness: This is how I put my two worst enemies to good use!!

Image source:’ Woman sitting on black chair’ by Anthony Tran in Unsplash.com.

It’s a mean old world and we all have our share of scars. Yet we all talk about how great things will happen in future. But happiness isn’t something that we wait to happen later. It is something that we strive for each moment every single day; work deadlines pushed up, coffee spilled over new shoes or failing that midterm, annoyances and hard habits pulled under the rug; everything and everybody works to be just happy.  Even the most pessimistic could do with a little bit of sweetness in life.

Unfortunately not everyone has fewer problems or lesser troubles in life. Things do sometimes turn topsy-turvy. And you could be in trouble if nagging emotions like guilt and shame  overshadow your resolve even for something as simple as losing weight or cutting back on booze. You are absolutely the kinda person who succumbs to his worst habits pretty fast.

But it doesn’t have to be this way all the time.

What if we could somehow influence our worst traits enough to serve us better? Skeptical! … It’s not my kinda stuff either but if you ask me, things don’t turn south every time you push for redemption. By being intelligently and purposely lazy, less mindful, messy, slow, cluttered and bad tempered, you could actually get rid of years of craziness and be more successful and happier on your own terms.

Building a good relationship with yourself is always a worthy investment…isn’t it? After all, we all spend quite a bit of time with ourselves; so might as well learn to enjoy it!

Here are a few life hacks that made even the lazy and wrathful person in me a little bit more happier.

Love your anger

Do you get to explode at a work meeting? Or do you think, ‘What that person says, is upsetting. I’m going to address it, but not now.

Whatever, you simply can’t wish anger to go away. It’s strong – it’s high energy, it’s not comfortable and it takes some time to ease off. There are times when you are in-the-moment but don’t know how to handle it to your advantage. But what if you could plan using that anger at some other time?

Everybody gets angry when a situation changes disruptively but very few realize that we can use that intense energy only if and when we know what we’re angry about.

Image source: ‘ Smiling Asian woman in apron’ by Amina filkins in pexels.com.

I learned to draw on that anger- not to match the intensity or reactionary blow-ups – but to harness it for good. Rather than wading in or stepping up the conflict, I found it helpful in managing overwhelming situations. All I pushed for was not to let it get out of hand.

After all anger is not rage. It’s not the hardest thing to handle; but if you could, it would sharpen your focus, ping you with lots of emotional information and get you some surprising outcomes.

It’s neither good nor bad-it’s what you do with it that matters.

Stop being ‘ busy’

I guess I love being lazy now!…. but I do not let my mind be occupied with squeaky distractions. I am talking of proper idleness- choosing to do nothing!

For most part of the day we stay focused on checking things off our to-do-list which is otherwise Ok. It helps in developing a productive mindset but en route it turns our personal lives into kinda running checklist, rather than something enjoyable.

Allowing myself to be lazy was just the perfect antidote I was looking for. For once I could stop checking G-news and Face book and WhatsApp every 10 minutes or hang on to some freaky e-mail that ought to have left me worried some three weeks ago.

Stuck with laziness! …maybe a little but for once I could waylay those scary to-do-lists at home and  embrace slower healthier activities like taking a walk or reading a good book. Wonder, why I couldn’t guess earlier; I was so close to being happier, simply by being brilliantly lazy!

Of course, the tricky part isn’t finding the way but having the reason to fulfill it.

Negative emotions sometimes do fix things

I never like the idea to settle things in part because being with difficult emotions leaves me feeling wasted. Maybe my understanding of toxic positivity’ touches the darker side of psyche each time I land in a limbo. It’s like ‘I am trying to cheer up someone who actually just wants to be heard’.

The positivity falls flat.

Haven’t we all have experienced it; when as a parent or as a partner all we wanted was our problem solved instead of simply talking about it?

But I find million good things about negative emotions. Fear, rejection, jealousy, guilt, sadness; all help me to navigate well in the social world. Like everybody else, I don’t spend much time tolerating negative emotions. I turn on Netflix or would grab a good book, sip through a cuppa good coffee or rush out to the porch to do some good to myself. I prefer to stay out of touch with intolerance.

I am no longer parenting misery or sadness!

Feature credits: ‘8 Ways to Overcome Anger’ by Mind Tools Videos in YouTube.com on Aug.06, 2018.

Try to be less mindful: It works!

Mindfulness isn’t something that creates a moment of calm if you are in the middle of a crisis. Anxiety, panic attacks or physical dissociation – these disruptive emotions with generally negative results and potential side effects leave you with nothing to fall back if things go awry. I won’t say mindfulness is bad but it doesn’t make life any better. I realized that being mindful made me feel unlovable, unworthy and if I allowed-it would consume me. I wouldn’t feel cared for and insecure with no sense of belonging.

Contrarily, I got better at recognizing that worrying less- helps, for there is no cure for it. It simply arouses feeling of fear and anxiety and gloom.

Besides who wouldn’t love to feel safe, secure and free of any fear?

Things have since gotten nicer and better as I dwell on it and gently guide myself back to everything that matters.

So, you too could make this personal for whatever your needs are and see things brighten up!

I jumped making resolutions

I despise getting bogged down by those silly New Year’s vows. I am not the kind who put his feet down firmly and stays put. I get shy fast and would quit in no time.

So, this year I decided to stay clear of resolutions. I tried approaching myself with as much kindness and love as possible. And…it felt good!

Think of it like this;

“If you hate your guts enough to lose 20 pounds, do you really think you would end up 20 pound lighter?

Hmm!… maybe, maybe not. But what you will certainly have practiced is hating your guts.

Image source: ‘Happy young woman in apron’ by Tim Douglas in pexels.com.

As far as I can see, self dislike is what drives most of us to resolutions. Dreams to dazzle push you to make epic promises that usually never get past the idea.

It would sound infamy to say this, but to be at large has been a brilliant win for me. It’s also the most loving, beautiful and exciting fun to keep all those barren promises out of my hair.

I feel free and I tell myself… life’s not so bad!

I think I now love myself deeply, no matter what!!

I took to writing to silence the lambs in my head!!

This year I forgot to make New Year resolutions in time and in turn decided to stop striving to be someone I could never be. I felt it’s time to embrace my messy, imperfect, soft bellied self and put my worst fears to good use.

This is how I made some real peace with myself and learned to love negative emotions.

Image source: ‘Hearing voices is more common than you might think‘ by John Read in theconversation.com on Oct. 21, 2016.

To me, penning thoughts and phrasing them is a messy affair. I wonder, if you are here only because you don’t know how to come up with your next story idea and have scant respect for my writing skills. Maybe you just want something apropos, some inspiring thought for your next storyline. I wouldn’t know if my choice of words convince you enough to appreciate that I too am a borne writer.

Either way, let’s get it right!

If you are reading this, I know one thing for sure;

You are a ‘curious’ person! And in that my success is certain. Oddly, curiosity makes one smart enough to want to know more and understand better. It makes you dig around for answers to “Why?” and pushes you to keep hunting until you are satisfied!

We all have our share of bad days and like everything else; I think I too have had some poor articles, or essays or blogs!! For me writing never meant to be rude or shocking or like some spilled beans on paper. I have felt and always acted on the desire- to purge myself of what’s inside me so that someone like you will understand what I feel at this moment.

Image source: ‘14 Hope Quotes Ideas’ by quote.cc in pinterest.com.

If only wishes were horses!

It’s hard to remember the last day, the last week or the last month when I laughed and found things intensely funny and rib tickling. When were those few hours that I wasn’t worried about something and enjoyed watching sunset or lying snug in warm quilt with a good book when it was raining outside on a wintry afternoon?

It’s kinda hard whenever it crossed me; Like everything else, this too will end in a while”!

Perhaps, I ought to glue something more inviting on my PC; something that would say;

I am more smart, strong and brave than I think I am. I am my hero with a golden heart”!!

See, it’s hard to learn about yourself from a distance, but maybe I have.

I wake up each morning and wonder what better could be there to write about. I read articles every day. I nose through pointless stories and try to make some sense out of them. I even look around for everything that would fit me into the bar.

Aw-shucks! Who am I kidding?

I like it when my stories are read but I absolutely love it when you subscribe! I get goose bumps each time an eye finds my page. I stand witness to your curiosity, your humor and your intellect every time I get reviewed.

Did I get it right? Maybe I am brave enough to hold on to a faltering confidence!!

My writing caper has not done anything to fill my wallet so far. Like you I too want to prance around to a success with words. I am though, yet to establish myself as someone with something up his sleeves every time he dares to shine. I know I cannot survive on catchy phrases and snappy headlines only.

But then there is this terrible voice endlessly growling inside my brain…

I must write…I must write…!

Feature credits: ‘How to be happy in 2 minutes The strongest motivation for happiness’ by My Inspiration in You Tube.com on Dec, 12, 2021

Last night I dreamed… of that nasty hand again; reaching out for me and a muffled voice breezily saying; “Never mind, you will get a new cat,”!

Wishes communicating!… Hell no! I have no pet and so couldn’t make much of it. I though remember feeling untouched and used.

Is that 1628 Scottish proverb nothing more a nursery rhyme? Wouldn’t wishing something dearly from your heart, could make it happen? Wouldn’t some falling star come to my rescue?

Yet I couldn’t resist writing and wishing …

I wish you to read what I have to say and give me the chance to shine and impress. I wish like everybody else you wouldn’t shut the window and run away. I wish to stand out with my content to an extent where people would hunt for my name and not for the headlines alone.

I wish you’d find me and read me till you drop.

For once I would feel happy and full!!

My secret to a blithesome married life: Love, loss and few grains of happiness!!

Image source: ‘Couples all over Instagram are “doing life together.” Here’s where it came from.’ by Laura Turner in vox.com on Aug. 02, 2019.

Everyone has vampires in their lives and like every relationship, marriage too is a ridiculously complicated one. It’s simple and easy to believe… that if only both individuals could get to know each other, understand each other’s needs and get comfortable with their surroundings, living a life with all its dark pleasures and experiences- healthy or unhealthy; would work epic.

Like sweet lies before the bed it would get under your skin and drive you nuts like some lemon bae!…all tangy and exciting.

It’s equally simple to say that people marry for love, but I believe it’s more about the joy of sharing things and experiences that makes for the most suitable material for wedding vows. When two individuals decide to live together, life is fated to turn upside down. Sometimes it’s not an easy one. An uncomfortable, bumpy road faces you. Understanding, likes and dislikes, need to know…challenges weigh heavy!

And it’s gets stormy and uncomfortable for those who couldn’t manage to keep moods high. Loss is inevitable if you don’t know how to cross stitch the canvas of life, needles going in and out, adhering to a pattern you cannot foresee or comprehend.

If you ask me, loss works just fine for weights and investments, but when it comes to living with a companion, you wouldn’t know a thing till countless panic attacks and anguish ransack you. Worry swallows you whole!

Over the past, the soreness of losses has grown. Some of us fume against the God, others find comfort in imagining multiple lives. Very few would look for solace elsewhere…

Haven’t we heard infinite times that a successful and everlasting marriage is forged with peace, love, and trust as primary choices. But what if it starts to lose it’s sheen? What if those snaky pencil scrawls, coffee chats, salty fried crumbly banana chips and clover leaves dried between the pages, begin to lose their craziness. What if all that pep talk about love and aftermath falls flat?

With just about everything else happening under the sun, wouldn’t it be fine to ignore the trite and build an elegant restraint for a successful loving relationship?

Here’s few simple ways to help you keep your togetherness blissfully alive and stoked!!

Choose to be attractive

Attraction is a decision that you need to make through out your marriage. You get to decide if your partner is hot and sultry!..if you are saucy enough to be exciting to your mate; if you are tasteful and zesty enough to be the zippy sparkling person she always wanted you to be! Who wouldn’t want to feel the excitement of being with a flirtatious, incredibly sexy and attractive partner?

Evolution has wired us to be drawn to anything and everything that appeals to senses. ‘Attraction thoughts’ likewise push you to focus on attributes that are exciting and drawing most. Like your beau’s great legs or the way she dresses or parents your kids? If this is freaking awkward; to you , it’s good news indeed!.… none of you have to be a cover model to feel attractive!!

Your happiness is only about feeling connected to each other. After all physical attraction runs far deeper than looks!

Giggle, chuckle, cackle or guffaw together

Life at times hurts, so if you can find some mirth even when you are in the thick of it, it helps. A laugh is what decides if you are being perspective. Finding hilarity in both good and bad times make partners find ease around each other. Be it some little inside joke, a silly irrelevant text or even watching a boring comedy together, connecting with your mate strengthens your bond even better.

Celebrate every small good moment for there will be none like it

Tough is a bad word, It’s dismissive and cruel. We all get our fair share of moments when our wits get thrown to wilds. It hurts, but to have someone in the weeds together, helps you shake off the despair easily.

And it’s just as important to acknowledge good times as well…together!

Image source: ‘Elderly couple resting on a bench’ in dreamstime.com.

If you ask me, good things happen more often than the bad ones, but we miss those opportune moments to connect.

So, next time your mate shares anything positive like some admiration from office colleagues or compliment from the boss, drop everything you are doing and lend an earful! Help each other savor the moment by sharing and celebrating. Promise yourself to open doors to your heart. Your fleeting moments together with few precious grains of happiness will never fail to outweigh darkness.

Don’t let the thought of a probable breakup haunt you

I was hanging around with my friends, I just couldn’t get to call back’. ‘I am over my ex’. ‘You’re just overreacting, there’s nothing to hide’.

Any such thought, big or small, is a big ‘No’ for a healthy and trustworthy relationship. So, if you find this tormenting and hurting, it’s not mere reflection of your anxiety but a red flag of a non-serious relationship.

Justified or not, chances are that you might be thinking of moving out!

But who wouldn’t prefer a few joyous moments over all that gloom and darkness?

And it’s easy too!!

Simply, don’t hold grudges for too long in your heart. Forget the mistakes of the past and reach out for some happy moments of the future. No jumbo patience… and be forgetful of the past bitterness for the real joy comes by chance. Feel it in the peals of laughter at a passing joke that leaves you gasping for breath; when you cross your legs so you don’t pee on yourself for you couldn’t make it to loo. It’s snuggled in the movement of hands painting, knitting, cooking or even rhythm of your legs on long rambling walks. It’s both the feeling of rapids thundering inside you and in the soft humming overwhelming your heart.

Funnily, happiness collides with you only when you are looking the other way.

Image credits: ‘Oldest Living Couple Reveals The Secret To Marital Success’ by Brittany Wong in huffpost.com on No, 22, 2019.

Even happy couples argue

With all that dancing and laughter and revelry- marriages are fun but being married isn’t always a piece of cake. There’s actually a lot that goes into living “happily ever after,” Not every marriage is happiness all the time. Like other relationships, sometimes marriages too hit a rough patch. But when in fight; happy marriages do listen to every view point, recognize them and if it threatens to go off the rail; try to mend them together!

Hinges crusted with past scabs, all that the door to your heart needs is a hard push. Ignore the screeching hinges and push firmly. Loving with all your heart, generously and fearlessly, will come back to you in dollops not dribs.

Accepting the inadequate rewards you with ever lasting bliss. In fact, being in argument means you’re normal and mad and hopelessly in love with each other!!

Age doesn’t matter

Been in wedlock for more than three decades and I have never considered age anything more than a numerical inaccuracy; some numbers that needs to be tackled all the time. The only thing that worries me is that it works more as a multiplier than as a division sum. We all get reduced to a fraction of what we once were!

But what the heck…!

At 40 you could still be the pig tailed gal or some jaunty good looking knock-out beau! Both of you could still climb the trees, jump the wall and beat up all the boys. Young and raunchy, fiercely ambitious with disdain for conventions, you both have had your share of one heartbreak, one breakdown, one true love, one success, one moment of despair and gloom – you have had mountains of them.

Yet looking into each other’s cringing eyes, creaking knees and despairingly loosening skin, things are not so crest fallen. Now that you have learned to love your lines and folds, aches and pains lose ground.

Besides there is no shame in growing old and struggling a bit. It never felt better for me to have equivalent of a general’s medal, pinned to my frame; and a reminder of all the battles I have survived and the ones I won!

Feature credits: ’10 Secrets for Happy Relationship and Tips for long lasting happy marriage life’ by Kennis World in Youtube.com on Sep 20, 2019.

Reality check? Well… “You do complete each other”. Age is a fabled minion that’s romantic and lets you flies high in the real world.

#It matters no more!!

Want to be eternally happy? Being miserable and thinking of negative thoughts helps!!

Seeing the glass as half empty might inspire you to fill it up!

Image source: ‘Skinny dancer jumping over sand’ by Andrew in pexels.com.

Happiness for me is an elusive virtue and for the most part ‘think positive’ belief fails me as a miracle fizz for mental wellness; one that you could pop in and instantly make half empty glass turn half full and everything around is suddenly bright and sunny. But just because I generally don’t eye the world from behind those rose tinted glasses, doesn’t mean that something’s wrong with me!

Sounds weird…doesn’t it? if this rings freaking odd to you, then you could actually be the one who is ecstatic and all pumped up about happiness, but is more miserable within!

How many times have you been told that great things happen so long as you believe them possible to happen and think positive? From pop psychology to improv classes to self improvement blogs; hype surrounding the advantages of positive thinking never leaves the din.

Sure, it’s good to be positive. It reduces stress and probably tweaks health. And it makes me vote for one profound statement that usually proves naysayers wrong; optimism bags you rewards most of the times including your well being!

But what about those who tend to see glass as half empty rather than half full? Does that mean that they cannot keep your sunny side up all the time? Is being a pessimist that bad?

I would say that only a handful recognize that our unhappiness lies in overly high expectations and too little struggle to overcome snags early on. Damned!…the millennials always get shamed as a ‘burnout generation’ that’s left with few choices to make.

Because we couldn’t make time for happiness; we are busy, confused and sad.

Fortunately a grim outlook doesn’t need to be a permanent one. You may get scattered from mildly pessimistic to relentlessly optimistic. But if you get hunkered down at the perilous end, you could still reap some benefits of being downbeat without burning yourself out.

And it takes only a few changes. Small and gradual; they are nothing like what you’d expect;

To begin with here’s a few of them;

You’ve been pushing yourself too hard to be happy.

Negativity sometimes works as a great defense ammo. You don’t get always crushed when things don’t work out your way. It never distracts you from a pessimist’s favorite past time; brainstorming. 

But it’s not always good to beat a dead horse! When you are ruminating; it’s not just another bad day, it’s always a bad day in a bad life of a bad person!

Besides, pessimism loves to blow even a minor problem to a billboard size one.

I couldn’t easily overcome that valley low feeling whenever I get stormed loud and messy. It’s overwhelming. I get screwed up fast because I couldn’t burn the bridges behind my back! Maybe my octopus teachings are not profound as it goes.

Do you think you would be left with any room to focus, if it soaks up so much of bandwidth? It’s no surprise why dreamers never fail to outsmart the pessimist in you on happiness index.

So, find yourself some quick distraction you can use whenever you realize that you’ve been stuck up with same negative thought for long. Pitch yourself into activities that ask for your full attention. Yoga, aerobics, calling a friend or even absorb some music. It might help you to avoid falling flat on your face.

And don’t be some eternal jaded jerk; it never feels epic. It’s perfectly alright to get depressed. Just stop trying to be happy. Stay in your lane and you may end up making more money and win over a happier marriage!!

It feels so good to blame someone else for your woes

“I’m lousy at tennis”; “My opponent has a killer serve.”

If you are the one whose way of interpreting life’s ups and down is dismissive and begins as an inane story with petty perspectives, then you could be failing in giving some basis respect to your self. When good things happen to you, you dismiss it as a fluke; when bad things happen you jump to blame yourself and brace yourself for a long spell of silent sufferings!

But you are not like some textbook dingbat who would wake up each morning wondering which and what went wrong. Are you?…

Bad events are like one time problems and disappear quickly. And optimists too get their dark afternoons. Cancer patients among them are just as badly depressed as their pessimistic counterparts.

So, when you catch yourself being dark, glum and all that, re-frame the problem so that it doesn’t sound like yours alone. Instead of standing all by yourself and thinking “No one is interested in me — I am pathetic!”, try something more bright; “Where’s the hostess? How could she let a newcomer fend for herself without making introductions? I most certainly wouldn’t allow that to happen”!

No scapegoats of course! But it helps to recognize that you’re not the problem, even if your behavior could use some pinch.

Besides, it feels good to keep practicing your tennis serve even if you’re not sure how would you rally against someone at your level. It’s always promising and worthwhile to throw a bad serve than drop the racket.

Feature credits: ‘The Optimist’s Creed -‘Denzil Washington’ by The Motiv8 in YouTube.com on Dec.18, 2015.

If only you’d imagine the world is coming to end.

Another thing that darkens your prospects to be happy is your penchant to make a mountains out of a molehill. You are always hyperlinked to yourself, rewriting grim possibilities until they blow off and turn into something of a doomsday screenplay. A simple cough turns into pneumonia; not the kind that would let you recover from ever! One missed deadline and it’s fast forward into permanent unemployment!

“Am I really to live beneath an underpass in a freeze box because I’m a day late on a project?”

Worst case scenarios are usually absurd but rewinding and playing them over and over again, makes illogical appear inevitable!

And it sucks!

So… just think of the outcomes that’s most likely. Chances are you are gonna miss the executive suit, but it won’t be under the freeway either!

The stunner of all this messing around is, that you do get to feel a bit of power over your thoughts and situation. The sense of nursing pessimism each morning works fine, for the world is not going to get shrunk in one day.

Keep trying and you’ll get what’s coming to you!

Do you know why your opponent at tennis court ends up with so much to feel good about at the end of the day? Long after you have given up and gone home still thinking suckers!… he keeps trying to unscramble impossible- to-solve mind benders!

There’s a lot of payoffs in this. Persistence is the cutting edge and it means what !…success at school,fatter paychecks at work and wider social acceptability. Who wouldn’t want to make some brilliant win sometimes?

If you are looking for the quickest way to get yourself in the loop, then act like the person you want to be; It’s only about changing the way you feel and the way you think that would define you.

When recognition is the only inspiration, act like you have triumphed some crazy big match battling it out with confidence and hard work.Fake it till you make it’ for this can have surprisingly strong and immediate impact on your emotions. But then, it works only when you correctly identify something within yourself that’s holding you back.

Get surrounded with upbeat people

Yawns like smile are contagious. Positive vibes work the same way. Hanging around with people who aren’t so grouchy about anything and everything, could be your one-way ticket out of an unrelenting pessimism. And if you are not feeling particular chatty, you don’t have to talk about what’s troubling you or put around the word that your mind is in a negative tizz. No need for anybody to know exactly what’s bothering you.

But simply being surrounded with positive minded people is usually enough to trigger a grin all around and shift your mood.

Image source: Vlada Karpovich in pexels.com

So, keep your frown right where it is, for some form of pessimism actually heals when not taken too far. Ignored and unforgiving;it in fact is protective and sometimes rewarding!

Whatever…

Someone’s telling you ‘no, is always a problem.

Small choices! Yup…but encourage yourself to smile, smile…and smile for this world is only about solutions; not problems.

And happiness is a journey where so many things make you happier, #guaranteed.

Do dreams freak you out? Your brain might be trying to tell you something!!

And it doesn’t mean that a downright naked-in–a-crowd nightmare is waiting to happen!

Here’s what happens after you nod off.

Image source: ‘Can lucid dreaming help us understand consciousness?’ by David Robinson in theguardian.com on Nov. 14. 2021.

Did you have a dream last night that has left you bonkers? Is it the one that drops in on you day after day?

Spooky!…Maybe it’s trying to tell you something.

Or perhaps it’s our brain’s way of communicating while we sleep. It’s wired like that but…

Oddly our mind isn’t. It’s as recklessly restless as ever. In fact it stays as active as it is while we are awake. Of course it doesn’t work like a neon sign, flash momentarily and do away with the dreaming business. But while awake it gushes around analyzing things happening around us…feel, touch, emotions, events; just about anything that we bump into.

Strangely enough, all of this can turn into dreams, though it’s not always obvious what dreams try to tell us. Sometimes we get freaky ones that stick out. At others, these could be downright frightening.

What does it mean when you dream you can’t find your shoes? What if you go blind in dreams? What if you dreamed of getting divorced? Right from abysmal fall to a frightening abduction by ETs, every moment of your dream has something to speak of about yourself that you wouldn’t realize otherwise.

So…read on for some startling revelations! Here’s to few common dreams and what they might be trying to tell you!

You are running like hell

You definitely are mobbed by some insecurities. You worry too much about what people at work think of you; how’d they react to anything new happening in your life. Just about anything and everything disquiets you.

I wouldn’t wait for anything steroidal happening, if I were you. I would let go anything and everything crazy and creepy.

You can’t find your shoes

You couldn’t make up your mind over some important decision you have to make or some cracking position you have been asked to assume.

If you find you have misplaced something of value in dreams; it’s just that you don’t think much of yourself and value yourself a little less in real life. You could be steaming low on self esteem in waking life.

You are falling into an abysmal depth

It’s a huge red flag for you! It’s a sign that you have some major issues in life; work, relationship, just about anywhere. You would feel as if things are running out of control and there is very little you could do about it. You are rather hanging too tightly to something particular in waking life. So simply relax and let go of it.

You dream of your loved ones suffering

Would there be anything worse than to wake up from a dream where you watched your loved one suffer. It feels valley low. Guilt pangs have hit you hard for having done something wrong in your relationship with this person. Atone it and feel wonderful.

You dream of death

If you die or feel like dying, it might be that something in your life is coming to an end. It doesn’t necessarily mean foreboding death or you having some terminal illness you didn’t realize you had. In your waking life this signifies that a part of you is changing. How you react to the event in dreams is the only way to know if the change is a welcome one or has been forced upon you.

You are late

…And you couldn’t find ways to make a rush for some very important date! You are not a White rabbit yet you have panicked for being late! This simply means that you are overwhelmed and inundated with work stress. Being late makes you feel as if you’re making promises that you can’t keep. Don’t leapfrog but strap your boots tight!

You have become stinking rich

You have struck gold! You have won the lottery and you are feeling at the top of the world. This sudden richness in dream reveals your deepest desires- from being rich to traveling the world and mean that you have become more wiser in waking life. Not so much material as spiritual wealth, it would also mean elevation of your worth to others. No pep talk this one! It’s the beginning of a new you.

This is great! Now that you know of it; chase them.

You’re in love

This is serious! If you bump into a passionate date in dreams and feel as if you are about to fall in love, then kick yourself!! You lack this kind of intimacy and passion in your waking life. Your love life, if any is all flattening and your uniqueness is being ignored.

You have missed the ride

You find yourself stranded on a platform or tarmac for having missed your flight or the train has departed. It’s a sign that you are weighed down by too many commitments. Maybe you are pushing yourself too much in waking life and fallen from grace one time too often. It hurts. But you can get to redeem yourself once you become intensely aware of your deep seated priorities. Just leave unnecessary baggage behind and be friends to your internal vibes. Remember; you cannot beat the clock!

You have done horrible things

You dream of having committed some satanic crime and trying desperately to cover it up. This could mean that there’s a problem inside you and you need to address it fast before you get a meltdown. Besides a whole host of other wild dream-crimes might leave you feeling evil.

You’re unable to speak

If your voice fails you in your dream, this could mean you are bedeviled with some unresolved tension in your waking life. You really want to be out with what’s in your mind and to speak and be heard. Begin with addressing issues in waking life if you feel ignored and have found no way to make your opinions heard.

There’s always a better way to shoot the breeze!

Image source: ‘The serious health consequences of not dreaming’ by Derek Beres in bigthink.com on Mar.25, 2018.

You’re flying

Flying in a dream is extremely freeing. It encourages you to let go of things you couldn’t handle and let things happen the way they should. It’s a sign that you have freed yourself from something frustrating and difficult to overcome. Good times or mere coincidence?… may be; but even this feels only when you have managed some weighty decision or whacked through some serious responsibility.

That’s a dream I wouldn’t miss to get onboard with!

You are being intimate with a coworker

Strangely enough, intimate brush in dreams isn’t as straightforward as it sounds. If you dream of being physical with a coworker, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have a crush on them. You could actually be looking for an inner connect with that someone having ‘positive traits you admire’ and would ‘welcome in your own life’.

You showed up for an exam but weren’t prepared

You have showed up for an exam and suddenly your heart sinks! you realize you are totally unprepared for it! You feel weird. Bile is swelling in your throat and a sour taste fills your mouth. You fear, maybe you have prep for the wrong subject or just can’t make anything of pages before you.

This dream is a sign of something positive in you; you are a high performer, hard worker and believe in doing things right. So, no heavy hearts! Simply put, it’s your fear of being unprepared that keeps you stoked to be totally ready to perform.

You need to pee, but couldn’t find the wash room

You need it badly, you’re trying but couldn’t find a toilet! If you get bogged down with this dream, may be you’re not addressing your own needs rightly in your waking life .

You literally want to let the crap out of your life. You want to declutter and let go of something or someone you couldn’t hold onto any longer. But you just couldn’t!

Of course!… you might actually do need to go to wash room because your subconscious is tipping-off with dreams of you looking for bathroom in vain.

Search yourself and get rid of dark afternoons!!

You’re getting married to a stranger

A sense of unawareness about your partner to whom you are getting married, is a manifestation of untold fears. You are not totally sure of yourself, what is expected of you and that you might be committing to something that you are uncertain of. You doubt if you will have enough time for yourself if you commit.

You’re getting divorced

You are crass enough to have filled your schedule with too many things and are overwhelmed if you dream of this. Should you despair?

No! this one is trying to tell you that you have failed to balance your commitments and keep up the promises you made to someone close to your heart. You are succumbing to perils of your obligations and everything feels going murderously berserk.

You’re standing stark naked in public

Have you ever woken up in a dream to find yourself completely naked? If you feel at ease being buck naked, you probably couldn’t be more comfortable in your own skin. However, if you are scrambling for cover, it could just be that you feel vulnerable and not happy with who you are right now.

It’s a relief that it’s a dream only, but it might be time for you to find ways to get comfortable opening up to others. An improv class might just be the right choice to begin with.

People from waking life keep showing up

It’s perfectly normal to find friends and family in your dreams, but it’s confusing when you stumble upon an acquaintance. This may mean that someone has left impression on you and might turn important to you in the future. If you dream of someone you like (or love) with someone else, it would mean that you’ve lost the fire and aren’t so passionate about them as the other people around you are!

You’re in an empty room feeling trapped and scared

You’ve got untapped talents for sure. But if you are in an empty room with closed doors or barred windows and feeling spooky and all, it could be about something old that you haven’t look at before; anything related to your life—your job, a relationship—that you’ve shut the door on.

But…no need to be eternally skeptic. It’s only about trying to open that door, even if you’re scared. Take your gloves off and do your bit. If you can’t switch up something major, it wouldn’t hurt to go on holiday for a bit.

Image source: ‘Lucid Dreaming’  by Daviona Plowright in driveforwardfoundation.org on Jun.22, 2020,

You’ve gone blind

If you suffer blindness in dream it could just be that you’re overlooking something in life or worry that you aren’t able to see something. You are in a situation in life or your personality where you have hit a blind spot. You debility in dreams may be expressing areas in your life that you have been dismissive and cruel to.

In waking life you need to go beyond what the eyes see and find out ways to respond in a legit way.

You’re searching for someone

If you dream you’re searching for someone, it would mean that you are trying to reconnect with your own identity that you haven’t touched for so long. Dear me!…nothing to do with that particular person.

You’re lost in sea and drowning

These ones are pretty scary!! You are lost somewhere mid-ocean and you’re boat is sinking fast. This tells you that you’re feeling overwhelmed or unsupported somewhere in your life –either by your loved ones, friends, or at work.

You have found heaps of yummy food

Did you went to bed hungry? If not, this could be something deeper. Food symbolizes energy, knowledge, or nourishment. So, when you dream of it it could mean that you long for more knowledge or somebody or insights about something.

Demons have scared you to death

Whether or not you’re the one of them, if you dream of running around in their midst, it tells that you are secretly feeling as though you should change your behavior. You’re worried stiff about it lately.

It’s time you get rid of that garbage ways and earn some basic respect for yourself!

You’re paralyzed

This is the scariest thing that can happen to somebody in dreams. Dreaming of paralysis indicates that you have a lack of control in your waking life. Sleep paralysis though can occur at the moment between REM sleep and the waking stage of sleep.

Your teeth are falling out

Events in your life are in upheaval. You’ve probably lost something of value in life; maybe a job and with it, your feeling of being in control. Your teeth are the symbol of your confidence and how powerful you feel. So if you dream like this; something is definitely causing your confidence to crumble in waking life.

You’re accused of a crime

If dreams where you find yourself an accused or actually having committed a crime, torment you then probably you’re hiding something from yourself in your waking life—and it isn’t always have to be negative.

The hate dreams where we commit or stand accused some crime usually mimes a conscious choice that we make in waking life to gain wider social acceptance.

Worrying for a lifeline! Ignore some of your personal needs; purge yourself of any guilt and try fitting in. It’s perfectly alright to stay in your lane and redefine yourself.

Feature credits: ‘Interesting Facts About Dreams’ by Kendra Cherry in verywellmind.com on Feb.11, 2021.

So, does this all mean that you should worry! Are your teeth actually going to fall out?

Hell no!!…

Don’t psyche yourself out!

If you are all worked up and fear losing sleep over what your dreams might be trying to sell you, you need not dwell over it for long for one simple reason…

You are not alone!!

We all share more or less the same fantasies and nightmares and rummage for the meaning behind those strange way of messaging. It’s only the way we interpret them that matters.

What dreams speak of is not always as undisguised as you would want to; but you would sleep a little more soundly tonight if only you knew what your mind’s trying to tell.

Besides who said everybody is #perfect?

Six #egg-centric breakfast ideas to make you skip the snooze button!!

It’s seven in the morning and you have just slammed shut your bedside alarm clock##@@**

It goes off again; you press snooze but it wouldn’t mind.

With the next shrill buzz, you hop out of the bed and hustle to get ready. A quick head -out- of -the- front -door is what’s uppermost in your mind.

And then you realize that you haven’t thought of anything for breakfast.

Yup!…You do need a good one to ride you through supper.

Again thinking of skipping it? Running short of time, rushed morning or simply not hungry!! If you are missing out, then you definitely are one of those 37% of young working people, who would rather hop breakfast than be put off by Boss’s disapproving glare, for the rest of the day

Pity…if it happens daily!

Morning cuppa java is fine to ease out of your sleep, but to kick starts your body, you need enough of breakfast to break” the overnight “fast” quickly.

So, are you doing enough to outsmart the ‘four pillar’ challenge everybody is talking so much about these days? Are you good with nutrients? Do you savor your first tuck of the day and get enough of it without going overboard? Have you ever tried new food combinations to expand your palate or checked on some new healthy delicious choice?

Search for answers and I’m pretty sure, you wouldn’t fare any good on those healthcare indices when it comes to taking a delicious, sporty healthy breakfast to fuel you and get you moving in the morning-quick!… if you couldn’t manage some.

It sucks!!… you need to dig deep.

After all, it’s nutrition that you require each day, is what we are talking about.

So, how about swapping your egg benedict with something more exotic? Cereal and toast; bagel and cream-cheese; bacon, eggs and hash browns; you have had enough of these old timers. It’s time you re-imagined what your platter should look like, if a jump-to breakfast is your only option.

From warm noodle soup to fluffy steamed bao, from cottage cheese to black beans to flavorful veggies; some savory, some bold and pungent, some mellow and natura fare; look up for some delicate heart-matter inspiring new-to-you alternatives to your standard breakfast that would lit you up enough to become a breakfast believer!

If you know how to weigh-in your food choices and get yourself some good taste to experience without rushing into a diet disaster, upgrade your morning meal with some healthy, inspiring favorites.

Here’s to what to eat when your day begins all rushed-up…

Egg Hopper

Image source: ‘Sri Lankan egg hoppers with chilli and coconut sambol’ in coop.co.uk.

What is this mysterious pancake clutching my eggs and toast?” you ask yourself as you struggle with your senses over breakfast.

Flaunting a fiery mix of sambols (mix of freshly grated coconut, chili pepper and red onion ), some coconut gravy and a spoonful of creamy dhal (dried, split pulses), it wouldn’t be long before you fall in love with your first Egg Hopper Sri Lankan style for breakfast.

A simple affair of fresh chilli, onion relish and pol sambol mix, this delicious satisfying oomph dish has the punch to make you come alive in no time. Yeast raised coconut and rice flour pancakes sporting luscious yellow of egg yoke in the center and cooked in a small wok with lid, are a spicy delight and exciting to tuck. Lacy, crisp with slightly steamed texture, it takes less than five minutes to cook from start to finish. When served with exotic add-ons like fried mushroom, bacon, sausage and fresh fruits. it sets out a profound rendition of English breakfast.

Greek-Style Scrambled Egg

Image source: ’10 Traditional Greek Breakfast Recipes’ by KIm in insanelygoodrecipes.com on Jun. 09, 2021.

You’ve heard it before; your first meal of the day is the most important! But you wouldn’t care if it doesn’t come with a caveat; something with short cook time and no major meal prepping.

See…you have hands full mornings!

Easy to make and low in saturated fat, salt and sugar, this one is yet another great way to jump start your day. Heaps of protein will keep your energy up without spiking blood sugar.

Throw in some spring onions, shallots, dried thyme or herbs for a little extra punch of flavor. Swap ½ cup of tofu for the eggs and use any combination of vegetables, cheese, and spices. Stir in some feta cheese before serve; better do that in a whole grain pita pocket and with some fresh cut fruit, to perk up this energy boosting food to help you get a heap of extra fiber and load of antioxidants.

Oatmeal with spinach and poached egg

Image source: ‘Healthy Homemade Savory Oatmeal with Eggs Mushrooms and Spinach’ in gpembrace.com

When you need something in a snap for breakfast, oatmeal is one easy way to go. No refined flour or unnecessary fats, it’s an excellent source of fiber and carbs, and would give you the energy push you need first thing in the morning!

But it’s not uncommon of you to turn shy of it. It would slip into your failed menu item list in no time, if it stays bedeviled for long!

Try combining it with spinach and poached eggs with a dash of hot sauce and fresh grounded pepper. A heaping full bowl of this comfort food will just be the right choice to begin a perfect week day.

If the idea of quick sugar fixes like cereal isn’t your thing, then a good portion of this nourishing recipe is your answer for an easy, warming and incredibly hearty morning meal.

Egg Quesadilla

For all that; not sure what to have for breakfast today? Since egg breakfast ideas are the name of the game, a simple Quesadilla is my pick for a grab ‘n go breakfast for busy mornings.

Stuffed with scrambled eggs, green peppers, freshly grated cheddar or Monterrey Jack cheese and veggies, all enveloped between two crispy tortilla shells; this food is sure to leave you smiling on busy mornings.

Wise fillings only please; no watery veggies like tomatoes, cucumber! Check out for preheated meat only since the cooking time may not be enough to render it soft. The addition of toppings like guacamole, salsa, and sour cream would simply spin this food to perfection!

If I were you and looking for ways for some easy tasty breakfasts, I would whip up a few of these in no time for sure.

Weekday breakfast or weeknight dinner, quesadillas definitely do the trick!

Green Shakshuka

You have worked late and have slept fitfully. Now you’re standing in the kitchen, eyes still halfway open, sipping on coffee like a living-dead! And then the aromas of sizzling tomatoes, onions, red pepper, greens and spices waft into the air. You wake up wide and good to a hot ‘n’ spicy tomatillo-spiked brekkie, that is ideal to dig in with some crusty bread.

Image source: ‘The Mess Free, One-Pan Flavour Bomb!’ in bondiharvest.com.

A flawless, versatile and a delicious hearty cache of protein, eggs can be poached, fried, hard-boiled, whisked into a frittata, and served with anything sitting in your freezer; somehow, they always work.

Cloud-Egg Croque Madame

Have you ever given cloud eggs a try?

When the sink is already full of dirty dishes and morning rush is on you, go ahead and prep yourself an epic breakfast sandwich out of some creamy lemony eggs!

This egg-cellent croque dish is a mash-up of vintage French croque madame and a classic rally of cloud egg. At heart, with a toasted cheese and ham sandwich topped off by a simple fried egg, this dish is actually easier to make than it looks. The fluffy texture makes it even feel like you are devouring a cloud. With a runny yolk oozing and cascading down the sides of a crispy cheesy-peasey sandwich and an insanely fluffy egg white sitting atop, this lip smacking spin-off is an insane invitation to polish it off straightaway!

Feature credits: ” How to make Cloud Eggs(Eggs on a Cloud)’ by Happy Foods Tube in Youtube.com on May.18, 2017.

Look!… I love pancakes and waffles for breakfast as much as you do, but honestly; both are more of a dessert than a sumptuous healthy food.

And when you start rubbing “red velvet,” or “Brownie” waffles, it’s like;“OK”. But “I won’t”.

Indulgent, lot more traditional and…no kidding! I too live for some great sun-up breakfast ideas but not as wild as those blinking calorie pushers or sugar scammers.

Morning rushes or not, I am not the one to skip breakfast!.

How could anyone ever think of missing it out or settle for some lame one!”

Whatever…

If you are the one who hustles each AM between putting last minute touches to today’s presentation; to finding where you took off your shoes the day before; to figuring out some good explanation for being late, it’s easy that you will miss a good brekkie before you rush out of the door.

But it doesn’t have to be!

Mornings are hectic but you don’t need to flip omelets or bake fresh granola for a not-so-quick breakfast every morning.

Build up a breakfast menu from the likes of these easy yummy ideas. You’d find them good enough to fall back to each day of the week. And I wouldn’t worry much for a whole new menu each week either, if I were you!

Feeling inspired?

Next time you wake up feeling peckish, try one of these scrumptious deals to take your first bite of the day to next level.

I took time off to help myself make friends :Here’s how it went!

If Paul Simon or David Crosby had their way and ruled the world forever; all we’d need is to make a call and a BFF would show up right on our doorsteps!

Reality however, is like some dark afternoon and friendship is the stormiest of all the ties. As hard it is to find ethereal love, arguably it is even more difficult to pick up a new pal whom we can really connect to.

Image source: Sudip Paul in Pexels.com.

Free time is scarce- For everybody! And so are friends.

Making one, particularly in this day and age, isn’t easy either!

They just don’t appear. You have to intentionally reach out to someone who doesn’t bore you, is not a hypocrite and never stalls to share.

And I was running scarce on friends!!

So, I set up certain tricky standards before I could touch elbows. I looked around for adjacent friends; the types you sometimes get to see at the Gung-ho parties that usually share mutual friends, but never get to have one-to-one conversations.

Still I didn’t know how to get past that awkward small talk and double time the “Hi! would you care to be friends” business. I had always thought of making friends but dreaded going to the drawing board.

I tried to fit in with the people I already knew…well it just didn’t happen…maybe it was way deeper than I thought it ought to!

The year I turned fifty was the year I realized I didn’t have friends. I was moving into a new decade of my life and felt strongly about my career, accomplishments and relationships.

Yet when somebody would ask me whom I will send a ‘red heart’ on friendship day; my mouth will open, I would gulp and nothing would come out but a long trail of “ummms”…

Like everybody else I loved to hang around with friends. I was wary and timid but would always manage to survive the cutting edge. I would often step out of the box and was friends to many. I was spending very few hours of any day alone!

When I moved out to my job after University, I could still manage to get people to hang around with and never fell short of full social calendar. Real or not…those guys never left me off the hook. I was a footloose and always raring to fight fire with fire at the drop of a hat!

But then something changed!

A lot many of them got married and drifted off; a few shifted to bigger cities and I felt flat. For once I was robbed-off togetherness.

Crank calls grew stale and scarce. We would rarely see each other and whenever that happened, it felt empty. It were as if everybody had burnt the bridges behind their backs! No hang outs, no pep talks…no happy hours to attend; it sensed like I was laid-off from my full time job.

As if this was not enough of a complete shocker, an old timer buddy also left behind, declared abruptly that he no longer wanted to be friends anymore and wouldn’t care less if I felt the same way!

The last straw was blown to winds…. Everybody had hung me out to dry.

I felt sad and lonely. I was nearing retreat and struggling to be mates!

For the mess, I placed a lot of blame on myself. I was canceling weekend plans. I was forgetting to respond to text messages for days. It felt like I hadn’t invested time in fueling friendship. It was like I usurped everything to run it dry. I could have shown more interest in my friends and their families. Instead I chose to spend a lot of my free time sulking and arguing myself.

Why I couldn’t have someone to call a best friend ?

Why wouldn’t I have a guest list nice and long enough to reserve more than a table for two on my Anniv blast?

With so many screaming lives running at full speed and in different directions, it’s hard to slow down long enough to find and develop new friends. People are hooked more than ever onto devices; so finding someone who would care more for a real life connect is a challenge.

Did I get to make new friends?…

I realized that I needed a few things before I could rake up quick rapport with someone. Little did I know then that I was prepping myself for a new decade; both in age and life!

And this is how I saved myself hours of tepid, dead-end banter…

It was my call…so;

Feature credits:’ Value of Friends”by manu7 production in Youtube.com on Nov. 13. 2017.

I hustled to bore people!

Aren’t we all aware of the things to talk about when we meet somebody for the first time? Sports, weather, work… trivia only; and we worry that anything close to our heart might scare people away. This drift of playing safe, stonewalls everything we build to know about a person- if he or she is the right one to be a friend in the making!

Daring outcomes, I decided to let go of the slipshod gossip and went straight for what moved me.

What do you think is the best television finale of all time?” “Have you heard about the Pentagon’s recent UFO report?”

I would find these to be a great starter so long as they could stir up some interest for me. I would back away if it worked otherwise and that would save me some rancid moments!

Whatever…I thought either way I would end up happy all the same.

If I could strike a chord; I have won, If I didn’t…

Well! I never liked the idea of going public and make myself speak out to strangers in the first place.

Besides I abhorred the idea of putting down my phone whenever I went public!

I pushed myself to get curious about people

What’s a belief you have that has changed over the course of your life?” “What has been challenging for you the last year?”

Asking something like this helps to strengthen the fetters, or so I thought. Knowing each other’s opinion over things trivial without judging them might just about crush the challenge.

It felt good;I thought I have finally found a way to make the kill!

But It didn’t work out that way for me …

May be I was asking them to reveal so early about who they were or trying to be. I realized that there is no substitute for time when we think of bonding strongly to somebody.

So I pulled off those superficial stunts to avoid rejection and…

I didn’t have to wait for long to feel connected.

My take on this?...

Next time you’re partying, or hanging around with some one you might want to befriend, ask yourself what’s worth sharing and what’s worth knowing.

Get right to it only thereafter.

I decided to give it a try and said “cheese!”

Seriously! I tagged in smile on my list, for I think it is a powerful way to pickup connections. For one thing, smile takes you out of your head and defines you as profound as it goes. For another, you are no longer being dismissive or cruel.

Besides, who would want to be friends to some grumpy, irritable or crestfallen face?

So, I thought if I could connect to someone by showing off those pearly whites; why not?

I could afford to burn a little, if that helps!

I stepped out of the box

Am I limiting myself? I could easily hit it off with people some 10 years older than me. The only glitch was that I wasn’t sure if I would find somebody brave enough, to hero a dingbat like me…

And it felt like a half baked whiz kid idea fated to end miserably.

A fabled friend to many in the past, I couldn’t dare to stick my neck out and get along with 25-something people either!

I find no shame in struggling a bit; yet I couldn’t find that one soul, I was looking for.

I know this happen sometimes; but to me it happened one time too many. I did come across people who would share mutual respect for Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings and Jumanji. Next thing we know, we would be meeting for weekly brunches and all that pep talk!

But like always…it’s harder. I would end all screwed up. I can’t get past the feeling that I was the only person in the party without a partner in crime.

It just wouldn’t work for me.

Whatever the reason, I decided to stay put and not get discouraged. I knew that with enough self confidence, flexibility and patience, some day I will find friends – and get to keep them for life.

I wouldn’t queue up though!

Image source: Eren Li in pexels.com

Today, down the line with 10 years of craziness behind me, it doesn’t feel valley low. I remember to laugh, listen and be kind. I wouldn’t ever let no one who comes to me, leave without feeling better and happier.

I did though find someone freaking awesome with a beautiful mind!!

Life has since taken a coin flip for good. I hum with joy and stay stoked all day long. I wake up each morning wondering if my Octopus teachings did score a point!

What are you saying”? she would quip; “Friends are a choice to make and don’t come with a tag”; if I were to tell her what it all means to me.

“Why would you say that you get lonely when both of us know that we are not desperate to find each other every day of our lives?

“Isn’t being together and sharing, the same thing as friendship?”

And she would lit up the world for me.

Both of us would agree and smile but she would still chide softly.

And I thought saying ‘I love you to the Moon and back’ was pretty cool!!

For all that I know about it, it sounds picklish! It’s kinda box full of darkness.. You imagine being so close to your beau and you wouldn’t know if saying it would change your life for any good. You feel you mean to talk about love. But before saying things cliche’ about the moon!…think about what it really means. Isn’t it any better if said it in your own way!!

Image credit: ‘I Get That You’re Busy, But That’s Not An Excuse To Leave ANY Relationship Unnurtured’ by Dallas Jordan in theodesseyonline.com on Nov. 26, 2018.

# “The sun rises, and a bear and cub begin their day together. They splash in the water, climb mountains, and watch the shimmering sky. They show their love by touching noses, playing chase, and of course, hugging

I Love You to the Moon and Back’ is a sweet heart-tugging emotional gentle tale of a bear and her cub; an adorable read by Amelia Hepworth; a sweet gentle rhyme…

And it never fails to touch the strings…

Today, I am miles away from the person I was at fourteen; far away from those bittersweet mushy feelings that were a torment sometimes. I couldn’t win myself over to tell others what love is all about.

It always ended drearily;

Like everybody else, I too wanted to party on special days especially if it was a birthday or prom party!

Is it really not any easy thing to measure? I would wonder.

It’s always been a meh for me.Will you be my friend? And it will end abruptly.

Guess I couldn’t ever fake things over!

Feature credits: ‘Love You To The Moon and Back’ by Betsy Benn in Youtube.com on Feb.03, 2019.

Love- I hear everybody say, is a beautiful feeling and finds many ways to manifest itself. So, saying to someoneI Love You to the Moon and Back’; Is it a perfect way to treat somebody perfect? I have heard this countless times from those in serious relationships. It sounds just like a mother who loves her baby and tries to make her sleep.

It even sounds hoarse some times.

Perhaps they find it the best way to moonshine their love for someone more than anything or anyone else.

Maybe I toy with half baked ideas for long. May be I wasn’t a whiz kid after all.

I just didn’t know why! But I did figure out how.

It is the easiest thing to say I love you. Yet you are in for a rough time if you couldn’t voice your passion. Because love sets out for utter loyalty and you can’t fathom it; the best you can do is feel it and make your partner feel that he or she is the whole world for you.

I read it somewhere that our heart draws energy enough to drive a truck some 20 miles each day! Whoa!…reckon it’s equivalent to driving to moon and back in an average lifetime! So when you are as happy as a clam in your relationship and fired up enough to belter outI Love You to the Moon and Back’, you are essentially saying that you love them with all the blood your heart will pump in your entire life time.

That’s sweet… and great… and equally meaningful!

I however, find it gross and extremely cliché. Just too many people on too many occasions air their emotions the same way. It’s kinda wising off love to stay connected.

And why the moon? Why not the sun? Why not some other planets like Mars or Pluto? Have we unseated them because of the distance or that they are now considered dwarf planets?

The moon is about 238855 miles away. So when we blurt out our love this way, do we mean to say that we guarantee love only for 477710 miles only?

That’ some mathematics… Your guarantee to stay in love expires by the time you turn 60 assuming you are twenty now. Even a car could get you to travel approx 12000 kms every year.

So, that doesn’t tag you to a very strong way to promise love to eternity…

My take on this? Well…. It’s tad different than what you might think!

I believe that if I was twenty years old and have posted on InstagramI love you to the moon and back, to someone I assume I would be expected not to love that person when I got 60.

That’s real Cool! A simple’ I love youdoesn’t work these days. People need that extra frill to express themselves. An extra pizza that everyone else has- would do just fine.

But if this is what everybody is hollering for, should it mean the same to everybody?

#‘What is Real?’ asked the rabbit.” “Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. ‘It’s a thing that happens to you.” Margery Williams in The Velveteen Rabbit.

Image credit: ‘Powerful Full Moon Love Spells’ by Emma Waston in love-spells-that-really-work.com on JUn.17, 2016.

I have been in blissful wedlock for over thirty years with a coy, broad vision gal who never heard of this quote anytime earlier in her life and finds it rather amusing.

What are you saying”? she would quip; You can say it better in your own words”, if I were to tell her what it all means to everybody else.

“Why would you say that when both of us know that we are not desperate to find each other every time each day of our lives? “Isn’t being together and sharing and caring is same thing as love?”

Both of us know that but still she would admonish.

I assume you are wondering if I have gotten into something too philosophical. What’ s all this musing is about, if revelation is not worth it?

That’ some food for everyone of us to think about.

Besides she might take more than a minute to figure out what this phrase is really all about?

But that is the point…!

Over the moon?… not yet, but I’m Ok with that. Together we have won over many of those cytokine kinda storm of chemicals that leaves us blinded with screaming rage for a while. There are moments of frayed tempers, bad arguments, and godforsaken sizzlers tearing us apart! We might as well be driving each other crazy.

But we manage to get that mess out of our hairs – each time. There is no shame in struggling a bit.

Oh shoot…! Ask no questions and hear no lies!! No..click bait story that I know you wouldn’t buy.

It’s just that finding happiness in your life begins with not wanting to be happy all the time. It’s fine to have bad days. Even when everything in our lives is going well, still there are days when one of us is in bad mood. Life sucks.. everything feels and works awful sometimes.

When it gets this bad, we slow down for three minutes… no more and let our thoughts simmer down. We use those moments to let what is happening around us, sink in.

After those three minutes are up, that seething anger runs out of steam and simmers down to a slower pace.

Crisis staved off, I smile and in turn… she smiles!!

We truly take it in with all our senses. After all a joyful life is the best existence we can hope to achieve. To have someone to love and to be able to accept that love in return feels wonderful!

So, hiccups and hookups aside, who would want to ride to the moon to be happy?

It’s epic anyways!!

Image credit: ‘9 Cute and Crazy Promposal Stories that Will Make You Miss Your High School Prom’ by Kiana Palacios in wheninmanila.com on Feb. 20, 2019.

Next time, if you plan to take your partner for a ride to moon and back fearing that you might just fall shy of the trust and promises you have made and the whole episode will get trumped, if you didn’t…

Think twice about what it really means. You could do just about everything under the sun and be over the moon without riding up to it. You will come up with a brilliant win…always, all the times!!

So, stay stoked and be a gift to your partner and yourself !

You’ll feel better and so shall your partner.

Wake up your senses with a humble Cup o’ Joe! : Hustle your Coffee upgrade my way!!

Just like wine and whisky the world of coffee is intense and complex. With endless versions and infinite ways, learning every trick, every brew method and every mix sounds like a serious cliche’ but you’re never late to stoke your passion for those easy peasy beans.

Tune in to coffee making -the complex Indian way for a start. A stellar coffee experience, it will turn you a connoisseur — in less time than you may think.

Image source: ‘How to tap into the health benefits of coffee’ by Amanda Loudin in nbcnews.com on Dec. 05, 2019.

If you’re creative, shy and introvert kinda morning person, then odds are you prefer  coffee over tea.Rather I would say, you are a typical coffee loving person who looks for it’s zing first thing in the morning!

And, what if it gets you to make more money and more pay raises? People in Britain and elsewhere now rally behind the notion that your fondness and choice for morning cup could actually uptick your personality. It pushes you more as a productive, significant and an affordable hand at work!

…in turn your pockets get deeper alright!

More than the ‘tea people’ who are usually pensive and look for tea’s relaxing qualities…. coffee fans are easily likely to say they’re “always” on time.

Latte, Mocha, Italian or American…Like most ‘Coffee persons’ do you also fancy morning cuppa to be black, plain and simple?

Myself a coffee aficionado? No!

I am not a coffee buff nor I eagerly look forward to it. I would rather have tea over coffee. No particular reason… don’t get me wrong! I do like coffee and espresso, including lattes and cappuccinos, but my morning go-to favorite is a steamy cup of sweet fragrant tea.

I have been a caffeine skeptic for quite some time but it doesn’t mean that I have no nose for it. It’s just that becoming a coffee weirdo takes time. It’s equal to becoming a wine or a whiskey sommelier. I think that it takes passion, love for the beverage and the desire to know everything there is to know about it.

And with so much happening in the atlas of coffee making, it’s no easy feat!

I know I have the rush to appreciate the magic of beans and might some day start working my way forward. Still, I respect those who take me for acoffee snob’. And I understand that there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a coffee geek at heart!

The point as I see it, is that till you get to explore the world of coffee making and learn the ways to brew it the correct way, people will frown and the cup you think you love might not be even cutting it close.

Image source: ‘Natural Mountains Coffee Archives’ in iddukivalley.com.

Hand beaten or frothy- I wasn’t too fond of it until…!

Like everybody else you know much about coffee. You are aware of the different roasts. You know of the different types of beans, where they come from. You know various flavor profiles and you know of all the fêted ‘decoctions’. In fact you are on top of every new coffee trend that comes your way!

But if you know the beans, flavors, and brew styles so well, are you aware that there are more than one ways to beef up your brew’s flavors and aroma?

No!.. I am not talking about some plain simple morning pick-me-up kinda drink any more, but a hand crafted brew of tropical roasted grounded beans that has enough richness, flavor and complexity to shame even the Starbucks’ favorite.

An overall caffeine sceptic, for long, I was confident of my health when the people talked about anti oxidants and balanced diets. No.. I am no health quirk but it never occurred to me that I was missing anything nutrition wise. Good healthy food, stimulating beverages…just about everything! Tea was also doing fine, till I fell seriously ill in the fall of 2017.

I was diagnosed with acute pancreatitis!

And nobody could actually determine the cause for this mortal condition! Everything changed thereafter. The recovery was slow and painstaking. The attending surgeon was fussy and stern…and warned me to go easy with tea.

So I started looking around for shortcuts to improve my gut health. Like many things that I loved to eat and drink but had to let go, I decided to go blind with tea as well. I had realized that it was merely worsening my infirmity.

To cut it short, eventually it all ended up with me becoming a black coffee drinker! Of course I get to add a teaspoon of sweetener (usually white sugar) to my coffee.

It was while I was convalescing and looking ways to less complicate my caffeine intake, that the story that went into coffee making caught my attention.

Search me… it’s interesting!

Legend has it that the 9th-century Ethiopian goatherd Kaldi was the first to discover the stimulating effect of coffee when he noticed how excited his goats became after eating the beans from a certain bush. Curious, he too chewed on the bright red berries himself. Roused and exhilarated, he brought the berries to a nearby monastery. But the monk disapproved of their use and threw them into the fire. A seductive enticing aroma billowed out that drew others to come and investigate. The roasted beans were quickly raked out from the embers, grounded and dissolved in hot water thus yielding what was World’s first cup of coffee!!

The story is largely believed to be apocryphal; probably because it surfaced some 800 years from the time when it supposedly took place.

Whatever…

Okay, so maybe you already prefer a dark roast brew…

That’s good, but if you were to ask me, you ought to experience every type of blend that exist before you get to decide which one you love most..and which ones a tad less! Once you learn to savor your drink, you’ll have a newfound respect for your local java shop.

Spoon into your perfect coffee bliss: It’s not blah anymore!

While the beans you grind are essential for the flavor profile of your cup, how you brew it is just as important. To call yourself a coffee barista, you need to know all that there is to different brewing methods from different parts of the World and how they affect the taste.

So, here’s to some lip smacking ways to whip yourself a cuppa good coffee.

Pour-over, hand made and without machines, try it the way they do in India! Smooth frothy and beaten up, the Indian cappucino is a powerful espresso that comes topped with a sweet foam laced with some fresh cream and a sprinkle of bitter cocoa.

My pick however is a more trendy go-to-spice one. I tried the spice-laced one once and got hooked up instantly; flavors aside I thought-the benefits are worth it. Now I almost always add cinnamon to my coffee. The zing of this piquant candidate perks up my mood in no time, whenever I don’t feel like using cocoa powder straight.

High on antioxidants and anti-fungal properties, even cayenne pepper, ginger, cardamom, nutmeg, lavender, star anise, clove, pumpkin spice and gingerbread spice mix-all in small quantities- are inching out that square of dark chocolate from coffee these days!

Am I asking you to take a blind shot at this unusual blend? Is this an easy way to stomach those beneficial spices and fiber right through your coffee cup without having to open multiple containers?

Probably ‘ Yes’.

Spices work just great when added to grounded coffee or to dark beans and have significant health benefits.

And it doesn’t taste gross either!

The ways of Beaten coffee

I think this whole coffee craze is a bettered version of a new beverage trend that has coffee recipes popping all over social media.

The Indian filter coffee-southern style is one bodacious rage that is getting heads turned and attentions arrested!. Simply put, it is an easy and absolute fad among the coffee lovers who have chanced upon it.

This decadent Indian style coffee is somewhat similar to cappuccino in that it uses both espresso and steamed milk. The name ”beaten” comes from the process of whipping up the silky smooth and thick mixture that sits atop the brew. By hand beating instant coffee, sugar and water you always end up with the delicious brief.

Making it is simple and takes little to prepare. Brewed coffee using standard drip maker or French press is topped off with the mix of steamed milk (no scorching hot one please!), instant coffee, sugar and warm water, all beaten earlier till the mix turns golden brown and thickens into a smooth frothy mixture.

The aroma and flavors are simply a coffee connoisseurs’ delight and absolutely irresistible!!

Image source: ‘Coffee That Smells Like Freshly Ground Heaven’ in paramparai.store.

South Indian filter Kappi: What an utter delight!

Filter kappi, filter coffee, South Indian filter coffee; call it by whatever name, it is easily every coffee lover’s sigh of contentment.

Do you know why?…

It has one single characteristic that caffeine fanatics love to lust over; the unmatched blend of taste, flavor and the aroma. Even if you are not a coffee addict, nothing would better your mood than to wake up to a cup of freaking good, steamy, aromatic coffee- filtered and made traditionally the South Indian way!

Am I getting ahead of myself?

No… you wouldn’t dare rip through me, once you get to taste a pour of freshly roasted, grinded and filtered punch. Every cup’s a delight and the proper way to awaken your senses first thing in the morning! You’ll love the aroma as you sip away the traditional Madras belter.

For not long ago, I wouldn’t know anything of how to brew a good cuppa! I wasn’t eager enough to rush for it either. Not until I figured out how to make a humble brew into something so atrociously good and overbearing.

I got to travel down South last year on vacation. And there the curiosity trumped me.

I somehow got hooked to filter coffee!

Till then whenever I had attempted to do something with those dark beans, the brew would always end up being too watery. Every time I attempted, it turned out dreary; so much so that I could easily pour half a cup of brewed coffee into half cup of milk and still wouldn’t get it to be as strong as I’d like it to be.

It’s only from the by lanes and streets of Chennai (erstwhile Madras) that I learned the trick to make some really good stuff. It was some serious technique that led to some seriously good coffee in the end!

South Indian coffee requires only an indigenous coffee filter to make it right. You might think that plenty of them are lying around or one could be fashioned out; but this one is different; nothing like the regular ones! To taste authentic South Indian coffee it needs to be brewed through this unique stainless steel contraption; believe me; filtering effects are nearly impossible to replicate.

Consisting of two nested cups sitting atop each other; the one at the top holds the grounded coffee and has pores to allow the coffee to pass through while the other one is meant to store it.

Filter kaapi when served in a traditional tumbler-davaraa, all swished a couple of times between the two to produce delicious foam on the top, smells and tastes heavenly. A davaraa is a small cup shaped like a jug with a curved lip. (In some Udupi joints it is fondly called Meter-Kappi and is poured into the glass from a meter’s height to perk up maximum foam).

But you really don’t need one for a genuine Indian filter coffee. Any pair of mugs or cups would do. I wouldn’t approve of swishing though, for those who love it steaming hot. The disadvantage of swishing is that your coffee gets cold easily.

Feature credits: ‘Top Coffee Countries | The Best Coffee in the World 2021’ by Revel in You tube .com on Jul.09, 2020.

Heads-up! A storm of #coffee stories might be coming your way.

If you are with me just for the coffee and earnestly care about how your cuppa coffee should taste, then jump for a traditional Indian percolator with a clean filter, put 2 heaped tbsp of coffee powder and press it down with a spoon. Gently pour fresh water brought to a rolling boil and get an even concentration of decoction in the end. Mix a little bit of chicory and fill milk to 3/4th of the glass. Stir constantly and you have just made yourself a unique filter style complex and aromatic smooth cup of coffee.

Mild or strong- you get to enjoy the aroma and flavors with every sip. Add sugar if you wish and enjoy!

If I were you I would figure out ways to hold back things for tomorrow and start fishing around for a percolator ASAP -just the right one and get my coffee fix each morning-the Indian way!! Believe me, every cup is a delightful and legit way to awaken your senses first thing in the morning with an intense sensual kick.

Still unsure if that would be anything close to a third wave coffee shop?

Make no mistake- you are no pinhead; you’re right there. Just remember, ‘You can never be a wine connoisseur without ever being to a vineyard.

So, reach out, grab a perfect cup of that bold Indian filter coffee and feel a huge uptick happening right away!

Yup!…I won’t judge you!!

Buy me a coffee: It’s 2150! and I am all whacked out.

Time is embedded in everything we do. It towers large over how we perceive the Universe. Traveling through it and zipping-off into the sci-fi future is usually considered the stuff of science fiction. But walking through twists and turns of time travel or meeting your digital clone is no longer a tricky or impossible fantasy. Only that we are still messing with it and searching for a workaround.

It’s then no surprise that the freedom to move through time just as we move through space, drags on as a stupendous barrier and overrides everything else.

Would something close to time-travelling DeLorean or a custom-built wormhole allow us to travel from one event in present to another in future any time soon? Would Universe care if we moved an atom from position A to position B? Are there impossible answers or is it simply impossible to happen?

Let’s figure out how much more is to be done before we get to get a glimpse of future!!

Imagine you have hopped onto a time machine, pressed a button, and have journeyed back to 2019, before the corona-virus jumped the species -from animals to humans and you have found and isolated patient zero!

Well…theoretically, the pandemic wouldn’t have happened, right? Not quite, because then future-you wouldn’t have decided to time travel in the first place.

Things rather don’t not work the way we want them to. Events readjust around anything that might cause an inconsistency and don’t let it happen.

Simply said, you could travel back into the time but couldn’t change anything.

This sounds tragic for those who wish they could rewind the clock. And that’s not without a reason. Who wouldn’t want to blitz through time and space at the speed of light to reach out into the past and undo those bad decisions and vile events that are a torment today and might hurt someone?

Let’s assume for a moment that it could actually be done and you get to travel back into time of your liking; but…

What if you can’t fix the past? Wouldn’t it be rather you looked forward into the future than backwards. Besides regretting or trying to fix things done absolute in the past won’t help nobody! Maybe you could salvage some of your broken present in future!

And you don’t need a wormhole or a decked up DeLorean to do it!!

Try this…

Not many of us may know but time is not a constant and tends to slow down as you move faster through space. If theory of relativity is any good then real-life time travel to the future is possible through time dilation.

Feature credits: ‘‘The Time Machine(2002)’ by Sebastian Jarus in You tube. com on Dec.15, 2013.

Do you know what this unheard of time dilation really about? Simply put, it is the difference in elapsed time as measured by two clocks. This could happen either due to difference in gravitational pull at their locations or relative velocity between them. If dilation happens not because of either of these events, then it is the ‘Velocity’ that runs the show!

You think it’s all screwed up? May be ‘yes’ and ‘no’; Yes because the dynamics on which our Universe works are baffling; No because the euphoria of time travel is formidable yet stirring.

So, let’s dig a little deeper into the space-time’ theory that fuses the three dimensions of space and one dimension of time into one.

If you think that the space is something flat and rigid that holds the entire Universe, then it’s time you corrected yourself. Re-imagine it as a curved and maleable trampoline-a piece of taut, strong fabric stretched between a steel frame using many coiled springs, the one used in trapeze, gymnastics and acrobatic exercises. Place a bowling ball in the center and it would cause smaller objects placed on it to slide towards the center.

The gravitational dips around masses in a curved space work the same way! pulling other objects in; and the closer they gets to the center, the faster they accelerate. For us, the center of this gravitational dip is centered right in the Earth’s core and it is here the acceleration is the highest. The stronger the gravity, the more space time curves, and the slower time itself proceeds.

In other words, time moves more slowly as you go faster through space, the closer you are to a center of gravity-pulled up by a black hole, warm hole or even a star on the verge of collapse, the slower the time would move for the object.

Image source: ‘Are Wormholes Real?’ by By  Sabrina Stierwalt in scientificamerican.com on May29, 2019.

Let’s put it this way!

Look above to heavens. Some hundreds of GPS satellites are stationed about 20200 kms above us. This effect is most visible there. The highly precise onboard clocks gain an average of 38 microseconds per day and adjusts for time dilation. Run them 38 microseconds faster and positioning error of some 10 kms happens every 24 hours!! This would increase exponentially if the time lag goes uncorrected.

Still couldn’t get hold of what this time dilation is all about!? Try and get a feel of it in a more electrifying manner on Netflix. Watch Interstellar that critically acclaimed flick from 2014. Matthew McConaughey as ex-NASA pilot Joseph Cooper, is tasked to pilot a spacecraft along with a team of researchers to discover a new planet for humans as the Earth is slowly dying. The crew travel to outer space and land on a planet with extreme gravitational forces due to a nearby black hole. The intense gravitational pull slows down the time for those on the planet measuring one hour on it’s surface equal to seven years of Earth.

The revelation of time travel is massive and dumbfounding! It’s devastating for Cooper as he returns to a space habitat orbiting Saturn after traveling through a black hole (inside the boundaries of the Event Horizon). The 5d beings had safely transported Cooper to the edge of the wormhole  near Saturn where he gets picked up and finds way home, only to discover that his daughter has turned an old woman while he had aged almost none and appeared the same as when he had left.

Check this out; Murph, Cooper’s daughter was 10 years old when he had left. Cooper traveled for 2 years to the wormhole and subsequently lost 23 years in gravitational time dilation on Miller’s planet.

So if we are so good at finding answers to whys’, why couldn’t we just leap forward into future!

Dear me!! this is mind-bending. It’s the Velocity that holds the key to trans-temporal travel!

For us to travel into the future, only two things could make that happen; either we take advantage of the gravitational acceleration caused by black holes or we jump into the space at the speed of light (1 billion kms/hr). Today, we could manage only a few microseconds into the future, given the current technology at hand.

But like everything else, technology too is ever evolving!

Image source: ‘What Is the Grandfather Paradox?’ by Greg Uyeno in space.com on Jun.6, 2019.

Should this happen sometime soon, would it be possible for us to get back to reality from future using time dilation and share findings with everybody?

The answer is a big “Yes”; only if we could manage interstellar travels at the speed of light!

There is a catch here though!

The voyage will be one way ticket- into the future and not back to the past because we can’t use time dilation for passage back and forth.

Does this mean that past is forever inaccessible?

Perhaps no. only if we could put to use a wormholethe areas of space time that is warped and connects two distant points in space. This bridge in space, if it stays stable, happily consummates other physical laws and lives long enough for us to make a dash; may be we could catch sight of our past lives.

Few though dismiss ‘wormholes’ as science fiction and argue that both particles and states of matter have ‘exotic’ physical stuff that would violate all known laws of physics. For them a trek back to the past is more inviting than a peek into the future.

And why shouldn’t it be? Who wouldn’t want to see the Dinosaurs or meet Albert Einstein?

But if I were you, I’ll be wary of this hustle! While it’s fascinating enough to brave a travel into the past, it might tempt you to attempt a change that could destroy future for so many.

Remember that blockbuster movie ‘ Back to the Future’ that had smashed all box office collections for a sci-fi hit! Marty McFly traveled back into the time and prevented his parents from seeing each other, nearly cheating his own existence!

It sucks! If he had undone his own existence, how could he have doubled back in time in the first place?

Marty’s escapade if nothing else, is close to a variation of grandfather paradox’ that none of us would wish to ever happen. What if you were to go back into the time and kill your grandfather for him being a monster or something before your father is conceived? If you were to succeed, how could it be possible that you are alive to kill your grandpa in the first place?

Creepy? Well…you ought to be amped up by now!

When we say that the Universe has the ability to self-correct to avoid inconsistencies, does this makes an anomaly-free time travel easy to happen?

Hypothetically yes, theoretically no!

So what’s the upshot?

Although time dilation could allow us to get a glimpse of the future, we will never be able to visit the past let alone alter events to create a different future. If Stephen Hawkins in his book Black Holes and Baby Universes could weigh the future of time travel into the past as mysterious and as abysmal as black hole, then it’s cooler if we rather skip it altogether and went forward in time.

It’s completely different mathematics that sits behind the string theory’. In fact, all the dimensions of time and space work uniquely for all possible future and all possible pasts including realities with a physics totally different from what we know of today.

I looked around but couldn’t find a McDee!

Like everybody else. I too got stuck at home in pandemic. Everything stayed shut and I just rared to jet off to some fun-filled destination. Of course, this was not gonna happen any time sooner.

But I did manage to get my hands full! I deep dived and looked for answers…

What of traveling through time into the future, if the planetary science and intergalactic travel limitations deny us a glimpse of the past? And not just in a boring way; like the one where we wait for it to arrive one sec at a time. What if I could zip through time to future back and forth as easily as pushing buttons and actually live a fantasy that’s been on the cards for at least 125 years!

No way! H.G. Wells wouldn’t have imagined that his 1895 epicThe Time Machine would kick start some serious investigations into my mind.

Am I only a curious creep or seeing ghosts!# If we can move freely through space why not time?

I wish somebody from ##SpaceX is listening!!

Sometimes curiosity overwhelms… well almost everybody. At least I get bowled over more often than once. When this happens. I look around for cues that might have some answers to this intriguing unexplored journey.

If general relativity refers to gravity as bending or warping of space-time, maybe everything that we do with space, we can do with time also. It is this warp that paves us the way to go forward but unfortunately not backwards and that too at a rate that we can control!

Well.. that’s almost everything but not exactly everything!

Excited to know more…scroll google for famous twin paradox” and you will get to know why if you travel at the speed of light and your twin remains at Earth, you will uncover something insane. A bizarre windfall has happened while you were away. You’ll find yourself much younger than your twin! If the voyage draws out a bit longer, you might look just a few years older than when you left, while your twin is probably a grandpa now.

Time appears to have passed just as it always does for both of you twins; it’s only when you two reunite that the enormity of madness reveals itself.

It is a bit disappointing for Star trek enthusiasts too; for all I know, you have to get very close to the velocity of light to be any close to warp speed. No!…I don’t think we have even cracked a tenth of a percent of the speed of light as yet; max.

But there is one true revelation that saves the day for me; We know for sure that…

If we could somehow spend a good deal of time hugging close to that ultimate speed in the Universe, our clocks will run slower. We will get to travel through time into the future. Nothing will change except that for a couple of years in voyage, time on Earth must have advanced by centuries even ten of thousands of years.

Feature credits: ‘ ‘Stephen Hawking- What It Takes to Time Travel’ by
AtheismLogicReason in Youtube .com on April.14, 2013.

Rest is just surreal!!

Maybe someday I get to crack this pesky paradox and get to visit a McDee take-away on some distant planet millions of light years away, one like scores of it’s franchises spread across galaxies and time zones, all warmly swarmed and inundated with hungry time travelers!! The standard menu has changed faces but no faking…the unmistakable flavors of ‘McNasty’ stays tantalizing and lip smacking as ever.

Maybe you could buy for a cup of coffee if the rush is crushing… after all it’s 2150! and people have turned fond of intergalactic sojourns. No worries…we will pick up the grub in some other galaxy some other time or on way back to reality! Who’s gonna wait when stars zip by?

Today, my take remains unshaken though. Till such day I get to wade through time, my experience of it’s passage is absolutely normal. My clock doesn’t race or behaves dopey. It ticks normal as ever. I age normally and…

I am no further into my future than normal. But I wait…

Maybe someday I get to travel into my twin’s future!

Maybe someday I get to choose how quickly I reach it!!

It feels so good to be a #Sloth-My guide to finding happiness the lazy way!!

“I choose a lazy person to do a hard job. Because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.”Frank B. Gilbreth Sr.

When getting out of bed feels awful, when going to the gym seems utterly disgusting and when you just can’t face the idea of siting down at the Office desk, I could figure out what has happened to you. You have crossed into the dangerous territory of laziness! The thief of happiness and poacher of ambition, it will end you up doing nothing with your days, if you let it get hold of you. Quite simply you are ‘dumped but not down’ for you have missed seeing the error of your ways.

Want some help to get out of the funk? Check-out on me on how to trump the struggle and fight blues the lazy way. Sometimes the best way to make stuff happen and relive happiness is by doing nothing at all!

Image source: ‘Dangers- Sleeping with a blanket over the head’ by Richard Adjei in news.payperlez.com on May 25, 2021.

I live in a messy chaotic world. Yet I am perfectly content doing nothing at all. I no longer punish myself and do not let reluctant party animals, chronic slow pokers and clutter of messy desk wizards to hurt me for being a slow pusher any more. Not that I have been like this always. It’s just that one fine morning I discovered that it was not the laziness but my giant intellect that’s to blame for my misadventures. So, I reworked myself out. I lied to my enormous brain down to a nap with pride. And look!! The hard work of being lazy has paid off.

I have finally found happiness!

Funny; I wonder why it feels so good to be lazy in the first place. Why things do not turn turtle for work-shy people; rather everything would start falling into place more intensely? Why all this shade against doing nothing? Why an unenterprising soul is underrated when being lazy might turn him a ‘Kingsomeday. What’s more shocking is that whenever I reached out to romanticize laziness, I ended up get around ways to overcome it.

Feature credits: ‘Study Finds Lazy People Are Smarter’ by Jacqueline Sarkissian in You tube.com on Aug.18, 2016.

So, I decided not to waste time on unnecessary motions; instead I looked around for clues to trick it into my fold and #find the balance between work and weariness.

And see, this is what I learned;

The Hard Work of Being ‘Lazy’

Laziness is something we all experience from time to time, but some people simply love to stay in that refuge forever, once out of that everyday slavery. And there’s a pretty good reason why they adore it so much! They allow their minds to wander into creative territory for free…by being lazy!!

I guess we all are hardwired to fill time. We easily get overwhelmed by things that are on our to-do list and plunge headlong each day, trying as hard as possible to burn ourselves out.

I find this distracting. Do overs or not; for me unrewarded geniuses are not geniuses but clichés.

Interestingly, one study claims that the more the intelligent among us socialize or work heads-down the less happy and sullen they become. The more you mingle, the more intent you get on spilling your guts around telling everybody how happy you are, without being so; the more half-witted jerk you turn yourself into. This sniffs less savory to the more intelligent ones. And the nerd in you stays outclassed as ever.

It’s not so difficult to figure it all out yourselves! Besides who says the world needs Type A personalities only? The ‘L’ types are not like some failed menu item and will eventually land in some rut. Amid misplaced sense of FOMO, a ‘knightly’ life beckons them.

If you are anything close to me, take a sec off and stop being busy. Check yourself out.; what tempts you more, an hour-long walk with your dog, or a snug spell with your pet cat on your favorite couch; all lazed-up?

Well, this might surprise you. If you think that being snug and comfortable in your space and doing nothing, slurs you as a remiss; you are mistaken! This could actually be a sign of intelligence, and not an inclination to remain sedentary or desk bound.

If we are to trust the ethereal revelations of a wispy study made some eight years ago; then cat lovers score higher on intelligence than dog lovers. And why not? It makes some good sense too. A dog person is livelier because he goes out there walking and talking even to strangers with a tethered canine in tow. Contrary to this, if you are more introverted and sensitive, you would probably prefer to stay back at home, read a book, sip a cuppa tea…and your cat doesn’t need to go outside for a walk.

You may not believe this but your pet type influences your choice between different environments. Dog- you take a walk, Cat- you covet the cozy comfort of a couch with your cheesy Ginger snuggled in your lap.

Get the hang of it! Even a brief interruption derails our train of thoughts. Walk your dog and you are distracted by sight of every passerby. It’s like you went too close to another browser tab and got distracted by a cat video. Hang around your home with your cat and you do not let yourself be beaten by those fast-track requests that your quick witted brain lines up fast for you!

At some time or the other all of us get miffed in this mad mad world for one reason or the other. At times bitterness and despair is overwhelming. We are put off partly because we are worried that we have not done enough and largely because we believe that allowing ourselves to be lazy might not be the perfect antidote for that garden variety stress.

Uh oh! Search your soul…No do overs but I guess you know there are ways to be a heartthrob to yourself. Perhaps you’re not lazy after all, or maybe it’s just that your good old brain is playing tricks!

My idea of a perfect laziness however means snacking on a couch, watching telly or solving cross puzzles. This might shock you but I discovered that laziness is what got me interested in being productive at the end; getting more done in less time and getting more time to relax.

Today taking a break feels rewarding to me. I find it ok to allow myself to be lazy occasionally; not because I am a big fan of being lazy, but because I want to be happy. Take a break and be a little lazy yourself if you cherish the same. Next time if someone accuses you of being a sloth, just tell yourself, “I believe he meant to say highly efficient”.

Image source: ‘3 Ways Having a Lazy Weekend Can Be Good for Your Health’ by Lexi Petronis in glamour.com on Ap. 26, 2013.

Shortcuts will cut you short

Most of us are usually bad at being ‘lazy’. And by that I mean not only the mindless distractions that occupies our space and attention; I’m talking about choosing to do nothing; rather prefer being idle. Much of the day we spend checking things off from our to-do list believing it to be of little consequence.

Hell no; this does help!

Our brains are hard wired to focus on things that we find both novel and threatening. Why else would you check news or social media every 10 minutes or worry over some stupid prickly e-mail that you received a week ago? If you are the one who would skip after-work drinks for some other night on the settee and stretch your evenings for a zero-guilt day, you probably are n every hawk’s live checklist every time you enter your Office.

But there is a downside to laziness too!

Getting stuck indoors could make things uncanny; even worse. You tend to get slave to running checklists, always worried about being productive, cramming more things-to-do in a day’s time and in bargain give up things that make you happy. Taking a walk or reading a book or hanging around with friends- you miss all. Unable to perk up your surroundings, no sweet talks with your flame! The squeeze is too hard to stay pumped up all day long. Sure, you are neck deep in weeds and all set to get a miserable heartache and a grumpy evening!

So, if a lazing mindset isn’t always the right choice why Danes and Finns are the happiest persons in the World? Why the chase of getting things done the right way, is no longer an infernal experience for them? Dare find them work shy! No…rather it’s the brilliance of a drifting mindset that makes you more creative and better at problem solving. This is when your focus rests and your brain puts pedal to the metal.

It’s massive! But your brain worries about the future 14 times more during spells of idleness or laziness, compared to being attentive to just one thing when you are kicking around. It literally occupies 48 percent of your bootless time mostly weighing your long term goals and intentions! Try remembering the last time you cooked up some creative idea or worthy solution! Chances are that it didn’t happen when you were hell-bent to finish things before upheaval happened. Instead genius in you may have touched the nerve softly when you have been taking a long shower or sitting on a park enjoying the surroundings.

When you laze and allow your brain to rest, you actually save on your mental pluck and get to expend it on more and more of right things. Hardly anything runs dry your mental strength than an anxious mind and the fear of missing out.

Best way to waylay it?

Just stop running wild, catch your breath, close doors to your mind and let it do nothing; no logic, no reasoning, no judgment- just plain Zero. Cool your heels till it tells you what it needs rather than what it cries for.

To begin with you could stop being obsessing over news; Go take a walk; watch some Netflix, listen Mozart or just soak yourself in a nice leisurely warm bath. It might just be the right thing for you to do. Be crazy to be lazy for once and you get to turn into more productive person than you would ever imagine.

Not long ago, like everybody else I too believed that success stems from hard work alone; but today I find myself rescued. I have reclaimed myself. It didn’t come to me from hard work. It’s rather the lazy way of doing things that have done sheer good to me.

The only difficult part is to see myself a sloth bear. From a rewarding guy to a disinclined and forgettable creep! To work with it instead of against it; sounds weird doesn’t it?

Yet I have triumphed! I have taken to the lazy way of doing things and I have prevailed!

How good will it work for you? Maybe a little; maybe not at all. May be you will get success working long hours and pummeling your nose in the grindstone. But would you prefer not to take the bite if you haven’t tried being lazy? How would you know that it doesn’t work even better? Take a shot, you might like it; even hit the bulls’ eye.

I get plenty of “me” time outside sleeping and dreaming

For the last few days, I kinda feel strange; weird perhaps. I don’t feel like doing anything;

Leave aside work and laze-off? Yes; Screw-around? Maybe.

It is the guilt of doing nothing that has set me up. I get mad at myself and mess with happiness. Easily it is the end of creativity after a day of laziness.

But not all is at it seems! Laziness tend to lie to us and if you think that that’s a problem, then you are bending it and being untruthful to yourself.

Laziness is irksome only because it slows down the time for us. It’s upsetting but it leads to a new insight. For me it works like an early warning system. It’s a sign that I am about to burn out for being overly worked.

The thought itself is horrific and isn’t really an accident!

Feature credits: ‘If you are a lazy person then Watch this’ by daily Motivation in You tube.com on Oct. 14, 2019.

This is when the need to endure kicks in. It tells me that I am a jerk if I don’t get my lazy bum into action, I might be destroying myself for good. Do I need to be on my knees any longer?

The other day I sat quietly and mused. I found myself comparing my present workdays to the ones at my last job. At first, it seemed like I was working a lot less with no 9-5 job.

I deep dived and realized that I had panicked for no reason. I had posted twice as many weblog stories, picked up couple of on-line courses, read three times as many books, network with 5x more people and presently writing a new story. Am I suffering from self-doubt! Am I scattered and seeing Ghosts! Bumbled or fumbled but in the end…I felt relieved.

It’s so weird how we suddenly dig up the advice we need at the exact moment we need it.! Interestingly, my brain’s anatomical connectivity no longer sympathizes with anything that leads to the idea of”I’m lazy”! It is riveted to the belief that ‘I am working when I am not working‘!

If I were you, I would rather fancy these vibes not as something cold and crippling but a queer sign of revolt from a worn-out body crying for a break.

When you notice the truth behind your laziness, it’s possible to take a lesson or two to your advantage. It took me years altogether to learn that we are at work when we are doing the dishes, having a shower or tidying up the garden. These idle chores help to connect our hardwired brain to rewarding tasks that are on our to-do list. In fact, when we laze, our body betters all inputs while everything else is on hold.

Laziness is perhaps one sin you need most to make a better sense of the world. Trust me, if your lack of laziness causes your impending meltdown, Gods are not coming to save you.

At first sight it may seem to banish us from living successfully or from thinking in any way well of ourselves. But at close quarters things look brighter and shining. If the point of ‘doing nothing’ is to clean up our heart of hearts wouldn’t it be right to get down to the business of lolling?

After all, the threat to our happiness lies not in our failure to be busy, but in our inability to be “lazy” enough. A heroically hardworking person isn’t necessarily the one, who sits in the business lounge of an International airport; it might be the person who gazes out of the window and occasionally writes down an idea or two on a piece of paper.

Do what you have to do for laziness is not a lie

If you have a smartphone, which obviously like everybody else you do, it’s most likely that you have often struggled with the idea of “shutting down” after work. As you sit idle or perhaps watch a movie or listen to a podcast; a voice at the back of your mind keeps telling you that instead of being lazy, you ought to be on your phone cleaning out the inbox or readying yourself for tomorrow’s meeting.

Image source: ‘Laziness leads to happiness’ in mashupcorner.com on Sep. 01, 2021.

Believe me, your inability to stop working, or even the inability to do so without guilt, harms your enterprise more than your resolve to stay upbeat. If you truly are a sworn work horse, then you need to learn how to be lazy for this is all about efficiency and none of us is inherently lazy.

In fact, the challenge to this frailty lies with the guilt that overrides it. There is so much happening around us every day, so many excitements, regrets, suggestions and emotions. Are we not letting the marrow of life escape us? Is there nothing smart enough to reign it in?

You need not dig deep to find the answer!

Whenever you get lazy and desire for an intensely-felt life clean of all ruckus, sit back and imagine that a deep part of you is hustling to cook-up a big thought. Make no haste; though you run the risk of being accused of gross laziness! Plan your laze interlude in advance. When you schedule it you would know the duration of your subconscious shame for having done nothing. Complete your errands beforehand and it will inwardly feel good.

Consider making a day of your indolence and get cracking instead of freaking out. Get lazy on a regular basis and you will find out why not falling shy of it makes a heap of difference. Your mind is all stoked and will help you get out of the weeds; fix the broken ideas and mend your missing control.

For a productivity guy, you’ve become a sloth bear. But what the heck… don’t fret. Simply prioritize, no overtime and you will get the most done in shortest possible time!

Laziness is your free wellness tool with zero guilt

Haven’t you heard less is more?

Image source: ‘It’s Good to Be Lazy’ by Atulhost in atulhost.com on May 26, 2019.

There is a creative side to all of us. When we are lazy we get plenty of time to toy and tinker within us. Getting cheered for being a busy-bee is a burden now. People do not want to hear about how busy your life is. Besides, you miss out on your friends. You are never in a mood to head out on a Saturday night or burn yourself a little on a weekend run.

Not that you are not left with enough time to rouse the clever and gifted person that you always were.

Simply side step for a moment and choose to be different for a while. You have just aced the art of living life the right way! And remember, if you howl and cry for long, are unable to keep the desk tidy, fail the assignments any other time than the night before the deadline or lament for having ruined so much time doing nothing; you could be the one with a giant IQ!

In fact being lazy is another way of being efficient.

I think lazy persons are onto something all the time! Go ahead, take that nap and shake off all the fears of going overboard. It’s better rather you chill with a cat than walk a dog.

You will always end up beaming!

And someday, your mind and body will thank you for it!!

To be or not to be…Friends surprisingly make you a happier person, only if you could be with the real ones!!

If you think that you are done with friends in life, it’s time you tell yourself a different story.

Like love, friendship is a thick soupy word and a messy business. It’s hard to be friends with someone who couldn’t hold your hands, or cut loose your heart strings. It’s harder to look for companionship if it comes with the shroud of secrecy surrounding it. Friendship is rather a stretchy word. It’s more of a life choice that you hesitate to fully buy into, fearing darker truth may come out later.

Friendship means something different every time we say it. It’s what a relationship isn’t. You may find good mature acquaintances but they don’t really get you good lasting friendship. At times hopelessly vague; ‘calling them a friend’ doesn’t help. Let’s just be friends” is a no less confusing either because it could mean anything. From bosom friend to pink of a crush, all it does is communicate what you never meant in the first place.

In fact, there is not one single great word for the kind of relationship that you have with the ones you love or loved. Give the requited attention a miss and the other person won’t find you awesome enough to hit it off.

Yet you shrug and say, “Sure.” And try again. But it’s weird and gets murkier.

When you think about it, you have no idea what it means to be with real friends.

Think about them and you will still touch yourself.

Perhaps ‘friend’ is a catch-all high sign that helps in ignoring bittersweet emotions.

Get into the Act

I grew up a shy introvert with terrible socializing barriers and was often shelled with embarrassing suggestions by those around me. Honestly, I did muster enough courage to try them all and overcome my fears. But soon I realized that it’s lot easier and more effective to be kind than to try to act confident.

I never tried to compete with the extroverts. I let them win at their game. Instead, I decided to invent my own circle—went all-in on being as thoughtful as possible and this is what I found out.

Everyone loves to hang out one time or the other, with the person who won’t say or do anything to hurt your feelings. But not wanting to hurt someone’s beliefs and opinions isn’t friendship. Real friends never coddle egos. They always tell the truth, love spending time together and never get awkward in each other’s company. Good news, bad news and secrets, they share everything. Gossip and late night wakes; it’s all part of lives in bonhomie.

Like everybody else, I too wanted to be friends with every single person on this planet. Probably more so, but not with someone who wants kinda attention that I’d prefer not to give. I had learned that coming out with the truth was way better off than using words that are so vulnerable to misinterpretation. When you tell somebody you want to be friends, but you really don’t, you are not letting them down gently. Mocking hits like a harsh acquittal. It hurts no matter how gently you have hurled the bomb.

Perhaps sometimes we get to learn about friends the hard way.

Are true friends hard to get by!

In university one of my buddies fell hard for a gal who wasn’t into him. She had a crush for a guy Robin who looked smarter and was perhaps wealthier. Of course, Robin wasn’t into her.

It confused and hurt everybody, especially my mate.

But it was kinda different too. Both heand the girl were doing fine and everything a couple would, except touch. Dates, long walks, deep conversations, partying ; it seemed fascination was blossoming. One day he asked her if she thought friendship could turn into romance. He would muse how his mom couldn’t stand his dad before they got married. A day later she uninvited him to a party.(Robin was going to be there.). What followed was enough to shake up things badly. Sullen moods and peppery behaviour crept in slowly. Finally he couldn’t take it anymore, and stopped returning her calls.

A year went by, and then one day both ran into each other. She came up and regretted. “Can we be friends?”

“What do you mean…?” he asked.

“If I see you, I’d like to come up and say hi.” It sounded more like she wanted him to acquit her of all guilt. Both agreed to smile and wave if their paths ever crossed. Fears of misplaced trust, broken promises and brazen lies, all fell apart in that one moment of regret.

Fortunately, he never saw her again.

That story tells what lot many people mean when they say they want to be friends, yet prefer kind of stealth friendship where deeper feelings never grow. If you are honest you usually wouldn’t want to bejust friends”. It’s hard but being real friendsmeans you don’t hold onto your emotions and actually make yourself available to someone who might requite your feelings.

Real life stories like this one grow on trees but payoffs are important!

Contemplating a relationship as a sack of rotten tomatoes when things turn sour, is like eyeing everything with serious skepticism. Crush aside, you should expect no one to be your real friend until you stop wanting romance to creep in your emotions. Before then, being around them will only rip your heart apart.

Funny! There is a simple fix for this

Nobody is hard wired to spend time crying out for someone who cheats under the cloak of stealth friendship, forever. And you need not hate somebody to realize that they are not good for you either. It’s nobody ‘s fault. The chemistry simply hasn’t struck. The slyness has prevailed!

So, gift yourself the truth! Firstly to be friends you need to ease off being sheep eyed. And in the second place, if you think of someone as your friend each time you look for favors; then honestly you are not ready for friendship.

Ease off till you could show some respect to your affinity. Pull up your head, put aside your phones and the world around you will no longer be clueless. Smiling, holding doors and saying hello to strangers; those powerful gestures will make you stand out. Seeing people, acknowledging them, showing some respect might mean you are charming and perhaps charismatic too. Trust me, the frenzy of warm hands reaching out to you, in turn, would leave you overwhelmed.

But is it enough to get you good friends; the real ones?

Countless times I have met people who didn’t click right away, only to be heard of later with a friendly gesture of sorts; sometimes through a mutual friend on social networking, at others maybe for a book exchange or casual film recommendation. These interactions spoke little but emotionally measured high. I guess, it’s kinda hard for me now to dislike someone who was thoughtful enough to have gone to lengths and make an effort to reach out!

Some people couldn’t make easy initial connections. If you are one of them, give yourself some time to dazzle. Once you think you have made the right choice and want to make a connect, reach out with whatever little beans you could muster to make their lives a bit brighter, even if in a small way.

Today, I gather I was right about my insights in the first place. Aches and pains not withstanding, I had aced the key to finding a soul buddy!! You may find my suggestions a tad basic, but that’s the point! If I have learned anything during my journey from a shy, floundering kid to a quiet thoughtful, self inventing, all smiles person who takes stock of the world in HD, I believe I did my basics well enough to have led myself so well.

If you are an introvert, don’t curse yourself for this innate skill. Hang on to it, for the one who listens, is rare and precious. Only a handful of us actually has this gift that sets us apart. Don’t chide yourself either, if you couldn’t hold onto to your lead. “You only get one chance to make a first impression”; every Tom, Dick and Sally would love to tear into you. Sure! But a lot has changed and this cliche’ is your buried past now. Chance to strike a conversation is just a click away!

How would you feel if you open your phone and a message is waiting from someone you just met, wishing you well for your upcoming interview? Or how about you sending a one-of-a-kind get-well-soon message to your ailing elderly neighbor?

Uh oh! No this isn’t about copywriting beauty and the beast. Privy characteristics such as kindness turn emotions toasty, takes the chill off and outwits brains and air when it comes to accepting connections! So do a little jig, get yourself out of the weeds. You will have fun and find joy reaching out to real friends.

Feature credits: ‘A Real Friendship’ by manu7 production in youtube.com on Dec.19, 2017.

Happiness needs a warm hand

A real friendship never sucks! It stems from mutual understanding and respect. It’s not meant to serve pleasure or purpose all the times. Rather a good friend is for friendship sake; the gold equivalent of human relationship. A lucky few of us might get a handful of real friends in our lives and it shouldn’t matter if they are relatively new. It’s their uniqueness that makes them amazing and priceless.

I have always found the intriguing connection between friends, happiness and longevity a bit weird but promising. The cutting edge made me feel zesty. I found myself surrounded by good people- people who never failed to remind me if I needed a haircut; people who complimented me and hauled me over in crises. Life never fell short of league of gentle folks. Listen, watch, notice and praise…these were small actions, but they helped me feel good for everything about me, admire myself and have strong ties with others.

If you are anything like me, rub some dirt on your fears, sell yourself a lot of quality friendship and trust me, you will ripe through a ‘golden-over-the-hill’ life. Try not to forget that real friends are meant to share concerns and confidences, build trust and not always be a sham listener or a crazy admirer.

Sometimes you cannot push a special connection between friends. It just happens. Two people come together, who find ease between them instantly and are comfortable in their skins. Laughing away at silly jokes for hours or talking the night away; a lasting relationship begins to fall into place between two people who understood each other well by simply being themselves. The spark wouldn’t douse even if the two “thieve” enormous pint or two of bourbon and celebrate!

So! where would you find the kindred-spirit that accommodates your mood, occasionally mimics intimacy and excites you in ways different than those you would otherwise face when spending time alone; quietly. Could you think up of an egghead who has all the signs of a true friend? Where should you look for one and know if that somebody is the big Daddy you were hunting for?

Taverns, bars, coffee shops, clubs, and even rec rooms are the usual joints that foster inner circles among people. Yeah! This is the tribe of savvy thinkers who will get you to realize that all that sweating, lifting and walking is not absolutely necessary for finding happiness. It is here that sharp contrast of unselfish indulgences change hands. It is here that your voice could finally get to grow some teeth. And, it is here that a good Johnny-on-the-spot could hammer some sense out of your successes, failures, opportunities and help you choose differently.

Someday you will make the naysayers jealous

I never realized that rushing lifestyles could reduce relationships into commodities so fast. It has left every relationship hanging by thread and every affinity slain of excitement. In all our complexities, we have shrunk to titles and net worth and eye each other as a means to an end. It is difficult to know who is legit and who pretends.

It all feels so punishing and fiendishly difficult…isn’t so?

Putting on a smiley face or saying right things and turning their back when the going gets tough, makes a difficult choice between deceit and uprightness. Props in hard times alone do not matter. A friend is someone who genuinely wants to see you succeed and is happy to see things go well for you in life; each time, every time. A true mate loves the person you are, with all the flaws and quirks and imperfections.

That doesn’t mean friends agree all the times. Rattling opinions help expand horizons! If your choice has been the right one, you will find yourself surrounded with people who share your values but warn you the moment you start falling off the track.

Worse luck! if your buddy wouldn’t help you to make the right choice even if that means saying something that you never wanted to hear in the first place.

“Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me, I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.” ~ Albert Camus.

Close affinities like good friends just don’t pop out of nowhere and mature fast. So, if you happen to have more than a handful of real good ones, you are indeed blessed. Making and keeping real friends smells of a rare experience. Each lasting friendship represents a world within us, a world that is not born until they arrive. And it is only when we bump into each other, a new world is born for us.

So, get busy being an amazing human being. Be a good one and knight hearted. If you haven’t reached out in a while to the people in your life who love and support you; learn to do so. The awe of discovering a BFF will smitten you for good. Perhaps then you could make out what Mary Tilley (94) of two children, four grandchildren and two great-grandchildren, meant of Evelyn Hodge as friend- they had lived next door to each other for over 72 years in Britain– when she mused;“Evelyn is great company”.

Someday you too might as well get to get a real good friend who celebrates life with you.

Till then, keep smiling and face up…

It’s never too late to walk off into the sunset!!

Who moved my Pâte à choux? :12 insanely charming and generously forgiving ‘Tuck-away’ foods for a zesty dine!

Indulging your sweet tooth with a smart choice could sometimes save you from gorging hastily onto leftover chocolate chip cookies in the rec room. Watch out for those boring low-cal foods; stick to them or you could cool off with a scoopful of delightful tuck-away choices. Munch on delicious fudgy brownies or slurp on the gooey goodness of warm chocolate lava cake, just keep an eye for the size and you will never need to miss the fun!!

From a twice cooked, crisp, light and creamy pȃte à choux filled with vanilla ganache and grounded hazelnut paste, to a garlicky Korean Cream Cheese Bun or a chocolate chip cookie- crunchy at the edges and fudgey in the center; each has the remarkable pluck to hit the sweet spot every time and leave you surprised. Michelin perfect and raving over the spice n’ nice flavors, these good-for-you treats can seriously partner your sweet tooth.

“It sucks”? Not convinced either! You wonder if there is a reason why banana bread is such a rage after all ? What so good is there that could outclass traditional recipes and bowl you over with a single bite?

At some point or the other, if you crave for something sweet and find yourself looking for flavors on your table that are right from the get-go, you are not alone. Strong cravings usually get mushy in emotionally charged moments; Or is it only a nutritionist nightmare!

There is always a good chance that dusting off your mixer to whip up something sweet or sauntering off to nearest Patisserie might work as a good getaway for your sagging spirits. Sounds good, only if you could find a simple but delicious food with spin off flavors that could help and skyrocket your mood! If you were to ask me; for a best possible experience, try a coconut sponge cupcake with a swirl of buttercream on top and a jammy surprise of mango compote in the middle for a start. Swipe right and the exploding flavors will smitten you into love!

So, what roasts and bakes should you reach out and accept? And—most importantly, without compromising your nutritional needs? Should you dig into foods that are simple and satisfying but come with a blast of sugars? Choosing treats comes with its own set of problems!

Sugar isn’t something to eat freely.

Remember back when single-crusted, whipped-cream-topped, custard-based wonder -the cream pie was considered healthy? It existed simply as an unearthly way to use up surplus eggs and milk dying in the freezer, but lately thrived into ubiquity.

Speaking of cream pies, do you recall that classic French fruit tart, one that was essentially a single-crusted custard pie topped with sugar-glazed fresh fruit? Slender, colorful and mildly-flavored, this sweet was a staple of dessert carts and somehow managed to pass as a brunch selection at some of the fancy dines; no more! Heathilicious! “Uh-oh! Take cover!” Your teeth do not need to hurt or fall off just because you have decided to indulge in something sweet? For many years, I didn’t either, but now I know; you can eat sweet, keep your teeth and have a good beat!

If you have just finished a scrumptious healthy dinner and look for something sweet to quell your craving-light on calories, sugar and carbs but big on flavors– reach out to ones that are balanced and on a healthier track! Honestly who wouldn’t want to eat plenty of calories and then binge on easy treats that taste sweet and decadent but won’t leave you with a sugar crash!

For many of us, everyday dinner is like a light-on everything else, but joy. It feels more like a lackluster vinaigrette that would want you to skip the salad altogether. So, there is nothing wrong if you feel like you need a cleanse, as you did after all those Christmas cookies! Not like a juice cleanse but just don’t feel like eating cookies for sweets everyday kind of cleanse. If you are like me, eating dessert isn’t optional; I simply am not satisfied till I dig into something sweet. And just because you have a knack for eating healthy; doesn’t mean you ought to let go of a decadent taste and fiery flavors.

If you are hankering for something sweet but on the opposite side of the Cheesecake Factory horizon, look no further beyond these 12 incredibly addictive, healthy and guilt free foods, that run high on flavors but are light on everything else.

Turmeric sourdough toast

Feature credits: ‘How To Make Turmeric Bread Recipe’ by Top Food Eli in Youtube.com on Feb. 28, 2021.

This honey glazed toast, topped with a generous dollop of fat free butter and nigella seeds, is quintessentially a simple but skilled brunch plate to turn to. Few love to experiment it with Chia and poppy seeds. Delivering on each count of bright yellow color and beautiful aroma of honey, yeast and spices, the toast pairs nicely with a towering glass of hot chocolate, whipped up thick with Callebaut (a Belgian chocolate brand) on a rainy afternoon. Come summer and it is the perfect time to begin working with your favorite jam and jelly toppings. Could you ask for anything more of a perfect brunch? And to think you could drive right past your ‘tuck-away’ spot!

Uniquely organic the sourdough loaf has spicy, warming notes of turmeric and black pepper all holed-up in an airy chewy bread that is perfectly balanced with the natural tang of sourdough. Great for making some lively sandwiches or unconventional bruschetta, this loaf is an absolute must for avocado toast! True to its name this is one singular bread experience you just couldn’t miss!

Almond Chocolate Mug Cake

Feature credits: ‘ Now you can enjoy Mug cakes ‘Gluten free” by Ashees cookbook in Youtube.com on Sep.08, 2020.

On a keto diet? No worries! If there is one food that could up your protein count and is a heart-healthy choice, it is a cozy warm mug filled with a sweet, simple, gooey and moist cake! Unlike other mug cakes that run aground because of the taste of prep-made mixes, this one comes packed with goodness of almond meal, maple syrup, cacao powder and extra virgin olive oil and is one smart choice that will perk up your nutrients with 5 grams of fiber,13 grams of protein and 3 mgs. of iron. After all, you’re definitely need not eat empty calories with a comfort food!

Convenient and gluten free, a single serve of this mug cake packs extra punch of chips, stirred-in after it is baked. Try it and you will find yourself taking a shot at it again and again. Just who wouldn’t spare 10 minutes for a meltingly heathilicious chocolate cake?

Almond Coconut Macaroon

Feature credits: ‘Coconut Macaroons’ by El Mundo Eats in Youtube,com on Jul.25, 2020.

Feeling stressed or bowled over! you are getting nostalgic for your favorite classic treats but also dread jumping over the line and ruining your workout tips. To bail out, take your comfort food a notch higher considering your health goal and taste preferences and try this homemade delight to make sure if it’s worth it. The real deal of eating this treat is that none of the ingredients are complicated. Shredded coconut, dark chocolate, egg whites and almonds, all come together to keep your heart healthy and cool, while keeping type-2 diabetes at bay! Naturally occurring polyphenols, offer anti inflammatory and anti oxidant effects to reduce the risk of chronic diseases, especially if you have sized up your crush modestly and opt for the recipe with at least 70 percent cacao.

In other words, this is one meal after that you could feel good about indulging in. Look out for flavors versions like Mango Chilli and Coconut Passion fruit- you will be awestruck!

Coconut Cream Pie Chia pudding

Image source:’Toasted coconut cream pie chia pudding’ in wecountcarbs.com on Sep.03, 2020.

If you are anything close like me then you must be spending a great deal of time thinking about food! We all usually lack creativity for day meals that could be simple and often confused with being ‘flat’; but did you ever think that even a small platter of coconut cream pie chia pudding could bring a little sensation to the dinner table? Rich and decadent this velvety coconut pudding has slices of banana and comes topped with coconut whipped cream and toasted coconut!

Chia seeds are the most versatile of FODMAP (Fermentable Oligosaccharides, Disaccharides, Monosaccharides, and Polyols, or say short-chain carbohydrates and sugar)fiber source. 10 gms /2 tbsp potion and you have just served yourself 8 gs of carbs and 8 gs of fiber!. Packed with Omega-3s, proteins and dietary fiber, this indulgent and nutrient dense pudding is a smart way to keep your gut healthy. Texture though is something that takes getting used to but health benefits are unassailable.

Could you think of a better low carb, keto friendly sweet treat to perk up your dinner spread! So, do yourself some good and indulge in this taste of tropical paradise!

Lemon and Yogurt syrup cake

Image source: ‘Lemon and yoghurt syrup cakes’ in taste.com.au.

If you think that you are a sucker when it comes to lemony delights, then this slightly tangy, flavorful, moist and totally delicious incredible cake is what you will love even waking up to, let alone enjoying after a quaint dinner. Marrying healthier options of coconut sugar, spelt flour and low fat Greek yogurt, this cake is a super moist and amazingly delicious end to your sweet craving. A simple lemon syrup brushed on while the cake is still warm, whips up magical flavors in each slice. For a twist, have it served with fruits, whipped cream, chocolate syrup or whatever you can think of. Berries with a light sprinkle of powered sugar make it the perfect way to have an angel treat, when you are on the go!

Cherry Coconut Yogurt Bites

Image source: ‘Cherry Coconut Frozen Yogurt Bites’ in probulin.com on Ap.16, 2021.

If those summery days are still all heat and sweat and your discomfort is inching up, chances are you are looking for something to cool you down. This refreshing convenience food tastes more like a chill cheesecake. Pureed cherries, coconut flavored Greek yogurt, maple syrup and shredded coconut; all blend together into a heavenly frozen bite!

Getting worked up over wrecking your fitness goals? Don’t fret; in bargain you get 1 gram of fiber and 5 grams of protein for each little frozen bite. Besides you score high on vitamins and minerals like vitamin-C and calcium also. (Each one cup of raw, pitted cherries gets you 10.8 mgs of vitamin-C.). If you are good on tweaked recipes, try lemon and blueberry combines for a start. Flavors here come together to make a super fresh, tangy and fruity treat. Eating it is almost like eating a pineapple flavored Paleta. Even strawberries and raspberries work really well and so do the peaches, nectarines or mangoes! With real ingredients and 45 calories or less per cup, this could easily be the newest sweet sensation to your private selection of desserts.

Lemon Pannacotta with Vodka Blueberry syrup

Manifesting an all Italian heritage, this inspired creamy lightly sweet tart, looks and tastes just as fancy. Served with some fresh fruit for added sweetness to balance out the tartness of lemon, every creamy bite of this molded chilled dessert is an oomph moment where the superbly complimenting tang of fresh berry sauce never misses the count. Turn your simple dinner, quick breakfast or casual brunch into a delightful escapade. It’s a lovely ending for a great dine. Looking beautiful and tasting great, it’s always a big hit with guests!

Frozen Strawberry Cheesecake

Image source: ‘Frozen Strawberry Cheesecake’ in dairyfarmersofcanada.ca.

If you are searching for a ‘ healthy’ low calorie treat, look no further! Using buckwheat, almonds, coconut and dates in the base instead of crackers, means this cheesecake has already cut down on processed sugars and added natural goodness. A delicious departure from the classic version, this 210 calories per serve cheesecake is all set out frozen with fresh strawberry and mint topping. Plus, the flavors are amped up even more, thanks to a drizzle of homemade strawberry topping sauce. The end result is the cake you are not just going to find anywhere!

Chocolate Pudding With Olive Oil and Sea Salt

Image source: ‘Egg-Free Chocolate Pudding With Olive Oil and Sea Salt Recipe’ by David Zinczenko and Matt Goulding in eatthis.com on Mar. 12, 2019.

Off the shelf puddings usually fare worst on calorie counts. Besides the flat regular chocolate flavor would often leave you bored and wondering if it was really worth the splurge! This home cooked version of chocolate pudding skips the eggs, cuts down on calories and goes easy on dime! Peppery olive oil and crunchy flakes of salt combine sublimely in this rich bittersweet chocolate recipe while flavors simply get fired up up with a drizzle of caramel sauce and fruity olive oil.

Still looking for a twist! If you want a pudding that comes little less smoky, ask for the one that does half smoked oil and half regular. Alternatively you could try lemon, lime or mandarin olive oil. Results will just be as amazing for this 310 calorie per serve dessert and won’t derail any of your healthy eating plans either.

Ginger-Carrot Pineapple Cake

Image source: ‘Easy Ginger-Carrot Pineapple Cake Recipe’ in eatthis.com on Jul.11, 2019.

A moist carroty delight with pineapple, chopped walnuts and topping of an easy-peasy cream cheese, this cake is one perfect combination of truly irresistible savory and sweet flavors. Grounded cinnamon, ginger and nutmeg make this tropical looking cake an all time treat that comes dotted with sweet raisins. Between the juicy pineapple and bright colored carrot ribbons, it is a perfect dessert for you to feel good about! Canned pineapple juice and finely chopped chunks whip up a fascinating zing that would leave with you with an insane crush for it. With 265 calories per serve, a dressed up cake with large shavings of toasted coconut never fails to take the center stage.

Cinnamon-Orange Lava Cake

In some places, dessert could simply mean a delicious piece of fruit. But there is everything so satisfying about this gooey lava cake! Watch the chocolate filling seeping out onto your plate as you slice through and the whole thing feels decadent! It might seem complicated but in fact it isn’t. Cinnamon and orange zest join bittersweet chocolate and pair perfectly to whip up a ramekin full of amazing flavors combination that you won’t forget anytime sooner. With 16 ingredients and 281 calories per serve, this spice enhanced chocolate orange flavored lava cake is an irresistible fare.

Mango and Turmeric raw cupcakes

Image source: ‘Raw Mango Cupcakes’ by Hana Mendes in onegreenplanet.org.

How often would you not find turmeric reserved in kitchen cupboards for savory dishes? Do you know that this earthy spice mingles perfectly well with sweeter flavors too! Incredible! But turmeric is just the thing to whip up a healthy treat. It’s loaded with curcumin, is amazing with antioxidant, anti inflammatory nutrients and livens up any recipe with a delicious earthy flavor and warm yellow hue.

Ever tried a turmeric laced dessert? From paleo turmeric ‘Cadbury’ Crème eggs to Mango-Ginger ice creams, turmeric adds an unexpected delightful taste that is simple but satisfying.

Spring is behind us and sunshine, blue skies and cool weather is around the corner. These bright, healthy orbs of sunshine make for an inspired dining anytime, every time! The unique touch of turmeric mingles seamlessly with the rich sweetness of refreshing mango, fresh turmeric, fresh ginger, lime and creamed coconut. The crust is a mix of almonds, sunflower seeds and medjool dates. Grain free and vegan, the recipe brings every bit of elegance to your table and tastes absolutely divine. Tweak it anytime! Fresh mango slices, flaked coconut or edible flowers; it’s a healthy and beautiful compliment to your search to eat savvy. And the possibilities are endless!

The more conscious you are about what you eat, the more you are likely to live longer!!

Here’s the thing about ‘tuck-away’ foods; They don’t have a black-and-white definition and you just can’t treat them like any other food. One way to go about them, is to eat them like Vitamins. Binging on these nutrient dense desserts would mean adding more protein, more fats and other foods besides sugar. This would of course have one wanting for more and if that’s you, it’s best you stay focused on ‘ just calories’. There is a time and place for enriched desserts, maybe; but your cheat day is not everyday, every time. Just remember that a mouthful could serve your half the recommended calorie intake!

Your craving for something sweet may rolls in and out and bother you persistently, but you don’t have to chill or deprive your sweet tooth completely. It’s still possible to indulge in without canceling all your hard fitness work. Everything in moderation” sounds OK, but the only problem is that if you are anything like me, you will have trouble stopping at few bites. Getting overboard is so easy and while sometimes it’s worth it, at others it pays not to go with so rich and super indulgent foods.

So! go ahead, freak out and ride a culinary rollercoaster with these best low pep tuck-away foods. You wouldn’t know but these calorie conscious foods could help you in shedding those pesky pounds without the worry of overdoing it!!

“I will find sunshine myself”- The hidden upsides of revenge eating and beyond!!

Food alone won’t make you happy if you cannot live by yourself.

Generally the word ’healthy’ and ‘revenge food’ don’t share space together. A late night ‘Jack in the box’ run or a quick cheeseburger on a road trip, each could hurt you if you cannot stay away from super-sized value options or settle for anything that is fast and easy, only because you are hurt bad and are on a trip to avenge blindfolded!!

But whatever you figure out to straighten things up, do keep an eye out for a food with plenty of nutritional value. Revenge or otherwise, you would do well to love being a winner in anger!

A romance with retribution is always bittersweet. It drives crime unashamedly; statistics say, up to 20% of homicides and 60% of random fatal killings!! And what more it shapes politics too. Even President Trump’s rush to Oval was nothing short of ‘revenge of working class”; those who felt cheated and abandoned had set the choice as an unforgiving sentiment.

Many of us would believe that vengeance against who have wronged us, is the only right choice to even out and the best way to avenge. In the heat of the moment it might feel relieving. This in fact is a powerful all pervasive emotion to get angry and wanting to hurt somebody who has harmed you. Have no doubts; the urge to avenge is all spiraling, reckless and self-inflicting. But then there is yet another one reason to celebrate its onset.

Post break up of revenge bout, the resulting lack of appetite will leave you slim n gorgeous in no time!! Who said I don’t care! A fitter, hotter, healthier and stunning you could make even your ex regret the heartache he caused you.

Revenge diet is not only about being depressed and ignoring food, all because of a weak or failing appetite. It merely adds to your woes. Revenge can never be your driving force and can never lead to anything worthwhile. On the contrary, it would make you look pale, weak and wasted. But the other side of the dime would nudge you to move on and be the eager beaver you had always wanted to be. So, be the live wire and give yourself some credit if you are a belly watcher and following a crash diet. Just don’t let that other person get away with all the credits. Love the break in the clouds and swap your anger with a pirated but healthy diet. After all, a revengicidal you is at best a vengeful jihadi on a crash diet. If you are on little Caesars diet, the ‘positive’ side of a revenge diet will walk you to losing weight in style.

But remember if you have chosen squirrel‘s diet just to make your ex jealous or uncomfortable to those who annoy you, the spite might be short lived and end once you have moved on. Close on heels will be your diet plan that would just go for a toss. If revenge was the sole motive you may gain more than you have lost! So stay positive and shed those extra kilos just for yourself. Nothing matters to anybody, once you or they move on even if you look a lot sexier after having lost weight. So who are you losing your weight for? Who could be your better audience than you yourself?  Go for treks, cycle, do yoga or simply meditate. And you are on your way to a healthier, slim looks. Just make sure that once out for revenge, the romance with anger stays positive for you and diet itself remains healthy. Depressed people usually tend to lose interest in food and shed weight in an unhealthy way that messes the scale once out of revenge. So if you are out for revenge and wish to fume with anguish and anger in a useful way without getting mired in vindictive rations, try on these foodstuff and overcome your spiteful frenzy without hurting yourself. Some of these are better served cold. Here are 10 of them to cheer up with and enjoy while crushing your enemies, etc., etc.

The lies we tell ourselves about revenge food: It’s healthy, it’s delicious!

“You would never give your child a can of beer but you don’t think twice about giving them a can of soda.” Dr. Robert Lustig .

Forgive those who have wronged you for they say this is good for your overall wellbeing! Who’re you kidding? How could you move on tied to some good, old-fashioned, intricately plotted revenge, served ice cold? This reminds me –some of your favorite food is best served cold! From screamin’ Sicilian Pizza to Bessie’s Revenge Cheese to spaghetti Bolognese, and from gazpacho to an icy martini, each favorite awaits to be eaten with a chilly disposition. Remember eating exotic is never considered a funeral food.

Ice cream sandwich

This one calls for baking one giant cookie. Try hard not to forget your revenge when you bake a giant cookie. Nothing would be more thrilling than eating a giant cookie in front of those who’ve wronged you, and not offering them a bite. No morsel would be just brutal and befitting.

Cucumber Soup with Mint, Watercress, and Feta Cheese

Fuming and feeling hot under the collar? Try this soup and feel your anger piping down to find you cool as a cucumber in a jiffy. Your luv for Feta though has just turned a tight corner! This is certainly not a recipe for weight loss, though it looks like one.

Image source: ‘Chilled cucumber dill mint soup with feta and red onion’ by Chef Andreia in dontask4rsalt. com

Time for a Regina George truly evil badass moment!!

Olive Oil Ice cream

Wondering if this frozen dessert is any good! “If it tastes really awesome?’ The answer is yes. It tastes as good as the aftermath of retribution!! What won’t taste good though is if you also push some sautéed onions and garlic in it and try it in a chocolate dipped waffle cone, sprinkled with cinnamon dust.

For the fun of it maybe you could just let that thought marinate with you for a while. The mirthful satisfaction of avenging silently is so brazenly gratifying that your stormy mood will find peace even if it is short lived. Choose a light-bodied fruity olive oil over its heavy peppery cousin and you will fall in love with the olive oil gelato, Great flavor and texture!! You just afford to miss the works.

Raspberry and Aperol Floats

This frozen delight will make you shut out all the insanity and ills for a while. And so would Aperol, that Italian bitter aperitif with a vibrant orange hue made of gentian, rhubarb, and cinchona, among other things. But what if you took your first sip of what seemed like some great creamy vanilla ice cream float, and instead you get to jab a straw into a monstrous frozen orb of ice? Call it a disaster that would be the worst, correct; the absolute worst. This edgy creamsicle, bittersweetly balanced and boasting of a crown of coral foam, is somewhat akin to Campari but is less boozy. Try it, you may end up admiring it for all the things gone wrong here!

Ajoblanco

A popular Spanish cold soup made of bread, crushed almonds, garlic, water, olive oil, salt and sometimes vinegar and usually served with grapes or slices of melon is essentially a more delectable version of white gazpacho. Traditionally made with green grapes the recipe is brightened up by adding green apple. It however, does little to your soothe your stormy mood as you dig in.

Feature credit:’ Ajoblanco- Spanish Garlic Soup Recipe’ by Happy Foods Tube in youtube.com on Aug 31, 2013.

The velvety texture is what makes it luscious for slurping, and atrocious to clean out of your favorite shirt!!

Watermelon Gazpacho

It’s pretty hard to be pathetic and be in a woeful mood when eating this bright pink, creamy and sweet soup—but this dish is exactly the kind of recipe that you could try for a perfect revenge food!

Feature credits: ‘ Watermelon Gazpacho’ by Currytrail in you tube.com on Jun. 19, 2019.

Light and refreshing, Watermelon Gazpacho is healthy, low fat and very easy to digest, sweet and spicy in taste. Perfect as a cold summer soup, Gazpacho is much like its tomatoey version but has a blend of watermelon, cucumber, bell pepper and tomato.

When you rake up gazpacho regularly, this soup improves overnight as the flavors get a chance to blend. It’s perfect for a light meal on a hot day. You can easily make a large batch and enjoy it for days!

Potato Salad with Pickles and Dill

Image source: ‘Dill pickle potato salad’ by Sue in theeviewfromgreatisland.com .

Creamy and chunky, this potato salad with pickles and eggs, tossed with creamy dill dressing is a perfect side dish for your summer rush for revenge foods. This is one of those foods which could give you some inspiration for a perfectly delicious revenge diet. So simple yet dreamily cruel, this is a different and delicious take on a not-so-traditional potato salad. If you are a dill pickle lover, this is the right revenge salad for you. Swap out the mayonnaise for low-fat mayo when you want this salad to be full of crunchy, dill pickle goodness!

If you find it hard to eat, try inviting yourself to this not-so-delicious call. Hey, let’s just call it water under the bridge; let’s try some delicious potato salad!” in an apparent attempt to bury the hatchet all within you. The stellar tang of fresh dill, sweet celery and pungent red onions that beckons you is always a flavorful way to troll yourself with a pop of flavors!!

Cakes and bakes: There’s a sweeter way to avenge

And it’s not always sugar’s fault. Indulge in those beer and wine blended cupcakes or stuff yourself with custard filled tarts, take a trip to a bar to create your own unique combination of frosties or rush out to your vacations with pies that could travel in a jar!; you just couldn’t blame that little bright crystals of sweetness, each time you couldn’t pull off your revenge! Try passing on a sweet revenge on someone else then.

People say bizarrely mean things that could make anybody go really mad. And if you happen to be the fuming victim, it’s time for some of these so-called trolls to get a taste of their own medicine. So how does it work? Begin by tracking down the physical location of the offensive person via the IP address. Whip up a retaliatory mini cake with said comment decorated in icing or edible letters. Box it and send to the person who wrote the vile comment, with a copy of the comment taped to the inside of the box. Trust me, nothing feels better to identify the tweet that spoke ill of you and tried to trump you as being the most insane person and then slam it in your own unique way. It’s heartwarming to name and shame the guilty. The shaming mini-cake in fact works almost like having a little parachute of sanity. Your greatest satisfaction will be just how weirdly awkward and embarrassing it gets for the wrong-doer. It works in no less the same way as a sweet savory recipe!

Still not convinced!! If you cannot avenge then take revenge on yourself. Pretty Italian cakes for instance make for a delicious revenge diet. Try cassata—a traditional Sicilian cake that uses sponge cake, sweetened ricotta, chocolate bits and candied fruit draped with a bright green marzipan fondant. The taste however is rather acquired and could leave you crest fallen, hungry and utterly dismayed. Pared-down version that blends all the familiar flavors—ricotta, dark chocolate, pound cake, almond liqueur and candied orange, is a better choice though. Then you are welcome to try horde of other delights. From moist dark chocolate cakes with layers of buttercream icing to tarts with vanilla layers soaked in sour cream, coconut syrup and whipped icing all wrapped in fresh coconut; these devil foods are atrociously tasty and await to incriminate you.

Pico de gallo

Image source: ‘Pico De Gallo Salsa Recipe’ by Teri Gilson in foodmeanderings.com on Ap. 28, 2021.

Pico de gallo or salsa fresca or salsa cruda, is a typical Mexican cuisine. Traditionally made from chopped tomato, onion, and serrano peppers, with salt, lime juice, and cilantro, Pico de gallo is used in much the same way as other Mexican liquid salsas.

Traditionally made with in-season, ripe, juicy tomatoes, if you wish to draw the strings harder for your sins, pull it together using hard, flavorless “winter whites,” you’re just asking for a bland, lackluster salsa. And this is one dish nobody would ever wish on his or her worst enemies…or is it? Call it food regret, food challenge or food jealousy, vengeance is always more satisfying when exacted in an unexpected way at an unexpected time. Wish you some luck!

Sushi

Image source: ‘Top 5 Places for Sushi on International Sushi Day in Kolkata’ by Madhushree Basu Roy in eazydiner.com on Jun. 18, 2019.

Elegant arrangement, enhanced simplicity and ethereal beauty is what turns Sushi into a work of genius. The preparation, shape, presentation and taste though somewhat differs from place to place representing tradition and characteristics so inherent to the locality. What more, the drama unfolds right before your eyes by the chef, and the enchantment that follows is simply irresistible. Traditionally sushi was prepared as pickled fish preserved in vinegar but nowadays it contains rice and is prep with sushi vinegar served with a white radish thinly peeled to a sheet like thingy and then julienned into fine strips. Few restaurants prefer to serve string Daikon (white radish) sans its spicy tangy taste.

Is it rude? How could you possibly draw blood for your offence if it’s none other than you? And especially when you don’t want to eat rushing with other things! My advice? Don’t feel offended, dine out alone and make sure that sushi is served with chili- all cold. Weird combo of food would simply overpower your sushi rush and might just as well ruin the evening for food being wildly off-theme. What a crass way to avenge yourself! You eat a lot or you simply couldn’t. Just one of the few things I can think of!

Let happiness find you!

I have never really understood what is meant by saying ‘Revenge is a dish best served cold. Does it mean trying gazpacho? – a tomato soup that everyone likes hot, but is served chilled on purpose, to be a huge disappointment and a rude shocker; especially if you think you are a sensitive-toothed person.

And what about Revenge being sweet’? Is it a revenge-gazpacho that needs sugar and the tomatoes are unripe – but just a pinch. Maybe revenge should never be themed desserty; it’s confusing enough dish as it is. And finally there’s that saying, “Revenge is a kind of wild justice”, Uh-Oh! No food-references here! But you might try some cured salty pork and plate it as a hearty, chilled, salty refreshing revenge-gazpacho. That’s just perfect for your pay back moments. Of course, there are ways to turn your food into a good healthy diet that will bounce you back to freedom and lose weight happily! What do you care, if your revenge diet reeks of rebounds of sorts!

So sit back quietly, eat well, grieve if you must and carry on with losing flabs!!

If only your pie could talk! :10 untold sob stories of best loved desserts that you missed.

When it comes to sweets, who would ever say never to those fleeting spikes of pleasure! But ever wondered how guilty, bittersweet or elusive their past has been? From frosted pies to sweet buns to cakes to Pop tarts, they all are winners and each one of them has an intriguing story to tell. It’s time we heard them. Like an impossible love affair let’s try and make the future of cheat food truly free and fair!!  

Imagine this. You drop by your neighborhood pâtisserie and decide to pick up one of those non-descript sweets that you have read so much about; but have not tried so far.

You decide on the right one and reach out to pick it up… and it screams!!

What the hell?!

That pud is talking, you are taken aback! No correct, screaming!!

Ok, so now you are getting a little panicky. What’s happening here? What’s going on with this dish?

Not for a moment would you believe that a future is in the making where the food is empowered to talk back and tell us everything about itself? Not yet! Not sure for now, but give or take another ten years down the line, your favorite food might mimic a ‘block chain’-adifficult to follow chain without any trail”, thanks to digital identity technologies sailing high these days. Everything will have an end-to-end encrypted log and our everyday pud will be able to tell us the full story of its existence!

Think of a future when we make a pick of dessert, scan a QR code and see the story of its life, and everything that owns a part of its story. Could you believe that trust apart, the power will be all ours to vote with our wallet in this moment!

This is when our food will ask us to listen, wanting us to trust what it has to say!  Sounds weird doesn’t it? But if and when this happens the stories we get told, might become the truth and the narrative a reality.

Truly free and fair: The ‘run clean’ truth

Ever wondered, why bakes especially cakes are synonymous with birthdays? Why stubs of wax standing deep down in the frosting of a sticky sweet chocolate cake, wink at you when lighted, to blow them and make a wish before eating the poor-me with a gusto? Funny but intense; the secret lives of goodies at your table leaves so much to explore! So, let’s begin by unearthing unheard of amazing life stories of 10 classic desserts that may have lost relevance over the time to more modern, processed favorites like Oreos and Pop tarts, yet remain as stunning and awesome as ever.

German Chocolate Cake

 “No, it is not named after the country Germany. With key ingredients like sweet baking chocolate, coconut, and pecans , this out of box cake drew its name from an American- Sam German (1802-88)-who first came up with a mild dark baking chocolate bar for Baker’s Chocolate Company in 1852. The company chose to honor him by naming the chocolate after him– “Baker’s German’s Sweet Chocolate.” The possessive form slowly faded away over the years, leaving behind the name German Chocolate Cake that we know of today.

A stupendous hit ever since it came into being, this cake filled and topped with coconut pecan frosting, stayed unapologetically decadent and indulgent for the larger part of 20th century but today this  not–so-German chocolate cake seems to have lost all charm and sweetness, and offers not much but texture to the cake. In fact, without the cream cheese frosting that tops it, it might actually taste quite bland to few. The texture is quite similar to coconut and renders the cake a German vibe. That apart, this cake’s appeal is nothing much to write home about!!

Revenge Cookie (Neiman Marcus cookie)

It’s unlikely that you haven’t heard that funny story about the woman lunching at the Neiman Marcus Café in Dallas, who loved the cookies so much that she asked for the recipe. For “only two-fifty” and the bargain was settled; but when the bill arrived, to her dismay she found out that she was being charged $250 for the recipe. The outraged woman and the story of enduring myth that followed, famed Neiman Marcus cookies as a delicious variation of chocolate chips confection.

The blended oatmeal in the dough is what gives these famous cookies the kind of tender, chewy, chocolaty texture and body that thrills every palate. Homemade and full of chocolate chips and nuts, this knockout bake is a guaranteed crowd-pleaser any time of day.  Add some more chocolate from a grated Hershey bar and you could woo even the most unrepentant naysayers to taste it.

The cookie story in fact, serves beyond a typical chocolate chip confection recipe. And it’s not difficult to know why!  The state of outrage of this woman had decided that no one was ever going to pay for this recipe again and it was shared in no less than a chain letter style. Fast forward! This bake story lately came to be reimagined and reinterpreted as ‘Revenge cookie tale’. Some even called it Urban Legend cookie!

So much for the story, but it left in its wake equally delicious and mouthwatering trail of Neiman Marcus cookies.

‘Gosh’! It did make a good story.

Jalebi

From ‘Zulbiya’ of ancient Persia to Bengal’s omnipresent ‘Jilapi’ the luscious swirls of this Indian dessert– Jalebi has travelled a full circle!

Try it on a frosty, finger numbing cold winter morning. A hurried walk to the nearest sweet shop, all trussed up in woollens, an impatient wait in the queue and finally you get to sink your teeth in a platter full of hot, swirled, deep fried sugary goodness, topped with that heavenly rabri (sweet, condensed-milk-based dish). Your soul sighs in contentment!

Already going gaga over this unrivalled dish! And why shouldn’t you? It has never failed to stir up an obsessed enthusiast in you. Eat it just plain after a humble breakfast or evening snack of Samosa and Chai combo, in milk or with curd, hot or cold, this syrupy yeasty batter is a delightful end to your meal; any time, every time.

But there is a dark side to this recipe too! This may shock you a bit, but Jalebi never originated in India. In fact, the one that has turned into a national craze and is a foodie-favorite elsewhere, is an evolved version of Middle Eastern ‘Zalabiya’ or the Persian ‘Zulbiya’ of the early 10th century. Finding mention in ‘Kitab al-Tabeekh’ a Persian cook book by Muhammad bin Hasan al-Baghdadi, the recipe also found space in another 10th century cookbook Kitab al-Ṭabīḫ, penned by Ibn Sayyaf al-Warraq- an Arab cook book compiler and author from Baghdad.

Popular in Iran even to this day, Zulbiya unlike Jalebi has an asymmetric floral coil pattern and mandates the syrup of honey and rose water instead of simple cardamom flavored sugar syrup.

Brought into the Indian subcontinent by the Persian traders and invaders alike throughout the medieval period, the shipped-in Zulbiya didn’t take long to weave itself into the traditional Indian cuisine like never ever. Today this syrup sweetness has invaded every menu. From road side eatery to country side fair to upscale restaurants this delightful cheat food leaves everyone ecstatic, indulgent and stoked with joy- always!

From heavy weight Jaleba of night markets of Madhya Pradesh and Chhanar Jilipi’ of Bengali kitchens to ‘Khoya Jalebi’ of Hyderabad to Jahangiri’ of Andhra Pradesh; call what is what; the lip smacking flavors from a hot, sweet, dripping Jalebi will never let you have enough. Allow yourself to burn for a while and this could be one more oomph on your table!

Rasgulla

To those who argue if Bengal has contributed to this country anything other than Nobel laureate Rabindranath Tagore, spark to Indian nationalism and Well Spring Pharmaceutical Corporation (makers of Gelusil antacid), they must not forget that it is the Bengal that touched India with soft, pearly white balls of cheese, dipped in flavored sugar syrup that has endured a top pick frenzy ever since.

Just as much few claim foreign origin for Marx, some stand up for an extra Bengali source for the making of rasgulla. No beans spilled! But it stays; no reference to cheese is found in India till the end of 17th century. So how could the Bengal ever lay its hand on cheese?

After Vasco Da Gama ‘discovered’ India in 1498 via a route that the Arabs had in use for at least two millennia before him, it was not long after, that the Iberians had claimed the entire Indian coast stretching from Chittagong in Bengal to Bombay in Marathwada.

And it were the Portuguese that ended up introducing three different acid-curdled cheese to Bengal. One was obviously Chhana (milk split with citric acid). The other one was the more smoky ‘Bandel Cheese’; an all-time British favorite, and the last but not the least was more like a hardened ‘feta’ (a Greek brined curd white cheese made from sheep’s milk or from a mixture of sheep and goat’s milk) that could never take off or make big because of its tangy, salty and sharp flavors. Nowadays found only in Dhaka, it is fondly remembered asDhakai Paneer’.

Chhana subsequently spread to rest of India, where it was compressed into blocks and given the Persian name for cheese’ Paneer’; a name that even the Turkish had borrowed from elsewhere! The heavenly blend of milk solids and sugar that enraptures us today as ‘Rasgulla, owes its honeyed grace to an even more sugary soul from Bengal-Nobin Chandra Das. Few still argue over the brains behind the business and claim otherwise. Rude and shocking! But whatever the controversy; if he didn’t invent it in the first place, at least it was him who tweaked it, took it to the market and finally to your plate as an out of the box sweet.

To this day, this chhana ball boiled in sugar syrup that makes it spongier and gives it a longer shelf life, is unarguably one stellar pick of a dessert. Served cold makes it even more ravishing and overwhelming!

Baked Alaska

A cake that melts hearts and is a celebrations celebrity, baked Alaska usually ends up as a shared dessert in restaurant menus. This cake and ice cream dish enveloped in meringue and then brûléed on the outside, is an unlikely but wonderful outcome of the baking method that was conceived by an 18th century scientist Sir Benjamin Thompson whose way to prepare theOmelette Norwegge,” the treat’s name at the time, was later embraced by Charles Ranhofer, a Parisian chef working at Delmonico’s in New York.

This often ‘Go-dutch’ special dessert is said to have been invented to celebrate the US acquisition of Alaska in 1867. Carved out of velvety cake and tantalizing ice cream, topped with meringue and set on fire after adding Kirsch or liqueur, the tale, taste and drama of this classic cake is beyond a delicate acclaim!

Mud Pie

Rich, indulgent and gooey, this pie is made with flourless chocolate cake filling topped with whipped cream in a buttery chocolate crust, and looks and feels like the muddy banks of Mississippi river.  It is rumored that this delicate pie most likely originated in the U.S. State of Mississippi, hence the name. If anything said in ‘Our Fifty States’ is true, then the earliest confirmed mention of this legendary delicacy did come from Jenny Meyer, a waitress in Vicksburg, Mississippi. The melting frozen pie created by the Chef Percy Tolliver reminisced her of Mississippi mud that followed the great floods of 1927. Her remarks paved the way for christening this heavenly dish of Graham cracker crust, fudgey chocolate sauce, chocolate pudding, chocolate whipped cream and fluffy whipped cream; Baked Alaska! All in a sensational awesome blend of flavors, this recipe cares little or none for the waistlines. The gooey chocolate sauce sitting atop a crumbly chocolate crust and served with ice cream, ever screams indulgence and never has any mercy for potbellies!

With more than a dozen recipe variations, this pie nowadays comes with an Oreo cracker crust, a layer or three of chocolate pudding and a creamy topping of whipped cream, marshmallow fluff, or meringue. Honestly, I don’t think if it could get any better than this!

Doughnuts

“Who made the doughnut with the hole in the middle? Just how it got there will be always a riddle.” Guess why Cindy Hutchins – a celebrity singer of 20’s sounded so true to the convoluted past of the humble doughnut! The origin lay right there in the name, but was so easy to miss.

It is true that this meek recipe with a weird past, involved Dutch immigrants, Russian exiles, and French bakers and who else; celebs like Irving Berlin and Clark Gable!

Seemingly typical American in origin, doughnuts have been around so long that even the archaeologists have been prompted to rummage the history of Native American settlements. Fast forward to mid-19th century and you may come across Elizabeth Gregory, mother of New England ship’s captain Hanson Gregory, who dreamed of and created the first doughnut as a deep fried dough that used her son’s cargo of nutmeg and cinnamon and a bit of lemon rind. Some say she did this purposely so that her son and the crew could store the pastry for long voyages; one that would ward off scurvy and cold as well. She had put hazelnuts and walnuts in the center as an afterthought and in a literal-minded way called them doughnuts.

Few argue that it were the Dutch settlers who brought the olykoeks or “oily cakes”—to New Amsterdam or New York City of today sometimes in the 1800s. But few also credited Hanson Gregory, the captain for jabbing a hole in the middle of the pastry that created the first ever real doughnut meeting the ‘mortal eyes’. Cynics think otherwise and maintain that he did this to stint on ingredients or maybe he thought that the hole made it lot easier to digest!

You would agree that less is always more, but doughnut didn’t come to fore until World War I, when it was first fed to the French trenches in million. War over, and back home the natural yen for doughnuts invaded the supermarkets and home kitchens alike. But it was not until 1920 that Adolph Levitt -a Russian refugee’s doughnut machine that signaled the arrival of doughnuts as a gainful trade. Till then it was merely a taste sensation and a public spectacle. And it’s not so difficult to know why!

For generations people had stood behind those glass windows transfixed to shiny conveyor belts and racks filled with fresh glazed doughnuts, often half swooning at the warmth and sweet vanilla richness of it all and learning in the process that the hole is made and not cut out.  There right before their eyes, the dough, shaped like a perfect smoke ring, jumped  off into a vat of boiling oil, got turned over to brown on the other side, and came out from the oil on a moving ramp, one by one like ducks in a row.

Wars worked like a powerful stimulant that pushed the doughnut consumption. From Doughnut Dollies (the Red Cross women volunteers)to Irving Berlin to Smithsonian’s; by late 1950s, everybody had romanticized the doughnuts into a frenzy. Nobody was minding eating his or her way through some anxious waiting moments! Consumption figures though drew the ire of nutritionists.

Generally deplored and not encouraged by the waist watchers, the 300 calorie batter, derided mainly for its sugar and fat contents, bemoans the unsaturated fats of the glazed delight. But neither the science nor the culinary geniuses scoff at it or cry-wolf to its utter addicts. The Krispy Kreme‘s hot “original glazed” doughnut safely adverted as “angelic” or even “sugar-coated air” remains a top pick cheat food to stay stoked and ecstatic to this day!

Lady Baltimore cake

A specialty and a favorite wedding cake, this mountainous white cake topped with a “Seven Minute Frosting “is what makes it so distinctive. The combination of chopped nuts and dried or candied fruits in its frosting make this cake very unique and render it complex flavors.

Image source: ‘Lavender Lady Baltimore cake for Evelyn’ by Jennifer Teismann in flickr.com on April 21, 2010,

Culinarians and critics are unable to find any recorded mention or recipe for the Lady Baltimore Cake except that it was in 1906 that it first appeared in newspaper articles. So, who actually invented or first made this cake is a matter of dispute. Some say that Owen Wister (1860-1938), a popular romance novelist had modeled the central character Lady Baltimore-after one of the city’s former belles, Alicia Rhett Mayberry in his story line.  In the novel, Lady Baltimore created a cake also called “Lady Baltimore.” It is rumored that Wister’s description of the cake sent readers of his novel scrambling to find a recipe that was yet to be created.

Few chroniclers claim that it were the Florence and Nina Ottelengui, the longtime managers of  Charleston’s Lady Baltimore Tea Room for a quarter of a century, who had created a cake toward the end of the 19th century which was somewhat akin to common “Queen Cake” of that period.

And if Janet Clarkson of ‘The Old Foodie’ blog is to be believed, the first recipe surfaced in December 24th 1906 edition of the Daily Gazette and Bulletin newspaper of Williamsport, Pennsylvania. This classic delight created with white cake layers and a fruity and toasted nut filling of figs, raisins, pecans or walnuts and crowned with boiled marshmallow icing turns out as a much lauded southern belle cake of the early 20th century. Of course, the Lady Baltimore cake apparently had nothing to do with the city of Baltimore or a lady for that matter. From most accounts, its origin is a teaser.

Delicate and light in texture, this pillowy white cake enhanced by the syrupy sweetness of dates and raisins, is an anytime ethereal finish to your meal!

Lemon chiffon cake

Light and airy-thanks to the many beaten egg whites that are folded into the batter-the chiffon cake was invented by a Californian insurance agent turned caterer Harry Baker. Lighter than a buttery pound cake and moister than a sponge cake, the cake was an absolute hit overnight, but the recipe could gain some acceptance some 20 years later, only after it was sold to General Mills. A closely guarded recipe, the cake in the meantime kept on doing rounds in the Hollywood feasts and probably for Brown Derby in L.A.

Fast forward to 1947! once the beans got spilled, Betty Crocker shared it as a signature dessert in a pamphlet in 1948 along with 14 recipes and variations to it. Rest is just history!

Image source: ‘Lemon Chiffon Cake’ by Foodie Photography in foodiephotography.photoshelter.com.

Lower in saturated fat than most butter cakes, the light texture of the lemon chiffon cake comes primarily from beaten egg whites, which are folded into the batter and give it a high rise similar to that of an angel food cake. Tall with an airy, even crumb that promises every bite to be light and fluffy, this cake may not have multiple layers or snowy frosting, but never falls short as a crowd –pleaser either! Blissfully overwhelming and always a top pick, the cake is an inescapable addition to your repertoire for cake-bakes!

Chess pie

The name sounds a bit weird! But this pie certainly has nothing to do with the game of chess. Unlike the heady game, this pie is a simple but magical blend of butter, lots of sugar, milk, cornmeal, eggs and a dash of vinegar.

Little is known about its origin but most believe that the recipe descended from early English settlers in the Virginia colony. A recipe similar to it is found in the cook book by Martha Washington from mid-18th century. Few however disagree and claim that this could be a deviation of ‘cheese pie’ that is similar in texture to British cheesecake and lemon curd. Yet another belief is that it was named after the town of Chester, England or perhaps it drew its label after the pie chest’– a piece of furniture prior to advent of freezers in which the pies could be stored.

Plenty of guesses and a bit of folklore, but the origin of the name chess pie to this day is uncertain. The close one is, that since it resembled much to the English lemon curd pie, ‘chess ‘might have been a more ‘Americanized’ inflection of the word “cheese,” which basically meant curd pie.

A cheese-less cheesecake with variations ranging from lemon to chocolate to buttermilk and nuts to Coconut and orange; this exalted recipe has time travelled from the period when pecans and other nuts were hard to come by and a sugar pie merely meant combining eggs, sugar, flour or cornmeal and butter. With unrivalled storage qualities, this pie was one dessert that was crazily endeared even by the queens and bishops and knights alike.

To this day, this pantry staple classic made out of basic pantry ingredients is an up-the-sleeve surprise serve to friends and family alike!

Perhaps this all is a bit crazy or a little dreamy, but if sweet buns and cakes and those frosted pies could talk — tell us their real story — well, let’s just say, who wouldn’t want to listen? They may not be screaming yet but their story is screaming out to be told. So when they do talk someday, let’s listen…

Or at least, may be marvel at their awesome tale for now!

Even as more, stranger-than -fiction sobfest stories await to be heard!!

Sweet and forgotten: 15 old fashioned classic desserts from the decade I was born!

From the black forest cake you bring out at special celebrations to finger buns from the local bakery, the gen-x versions of retro desserts have a history to remember. And nothing hits the spot better than these vintage remakes. Reminisce and re-live the awesome goodness of these smash hits from the fabulous fifties. Just let go of yourself and don’t forget; you are never too old to enjoy!!

Few things endure, like fond memories of the foods we ate as children. They are pleasant and reassuring. If you are from the 1950s or 1960s, you would agree that life was no less complicated and imperfect then, as it is now. Those were the times when nobody would settle  for anything less, especially if it was about food. Yet it was all so simple and perfect! From frosted party sandwich loaves to tea sandwich treats, from ribbon sandwiches to their pinwheel and mosaic cousins; moist, frosted and vibrantly flavored classics ‘afters’ were everywhere. You just couldn’t have helped drool over those sensational dinner and dessert combos! Few of you might still be bumping into Spam loaf flashback now and then.

And remember those quirky ads plastered high and bright across the billboards and splashed over TV screens! ‘Try topping your mister’s Jell-O Chiffon Pie with whipped cream and shaved chocolate. He’ll love it!”. The years of fabled 50’s were the dawn of easy-to prepare foods. For the first time you didn’t need to make simple dish like pie from scratch. Jell-O had come out with new easy-fillings for favorites like Chiffon and Lemon meringue pie. Cakes and pies were the hot favorites for desserts. Every baker now knew that for Chiffon desserts, egg whites was to be beaten into the mix to produce the “fluffy” consistency. But with the new Jell-O Chiffon pie filling, only sugar and water whipped up a light and airy treat that was similar in texture to that of Chiffon fabric, another popular trend in the Fabulous Fifties!

The first thing that had stormed the center stage of desserts then, were the ads featuring Jell-O recipes. Jell-O was a big deal then and people were beginning to learn all the neat things one could do with it; Parfaits, Jell-O molds, even pies! Popping in a fruit into a Jell-O mold was the perfect sweet pot-luck theme. To the 1950’s, Jell-O was heaven-sent! It made things so easy to end up with people-pleasing treats. All that was then needed to satisfy a sweet tooth was a wrap of banana cream pudding, a frozen pie crust, and some whipped topping; simple, classic, and always a huge hit!

But, like all the subtler things in life, desserts too changed trends. Over the time the people have aced the art of making great desserts, but the missive is loud and clear; Golden desserts from fifties are still missed. You can’t time travel, but you can always remember the happy fulfilled days of poodle skirts, jukeboxes and diner foods of old fashioned recipes invariably flanked with assortment of delicious desserts to polish off.

Take a trip down the memory lane with these 15 long forgotten desserts and find out what second course everyone was talking about then and if any of those delights are still around or forgotten much like that exquisite chocolate fondue you were gifted on your wedding day!!

Angel Food Cake

This sponge cake was one dessert that made its place as the most popular sweet serve to the guests in the 1950s. Topped with sugary berries and no chemical leavener, this most ethereal of cakes drew its distinction from other kuchens of its time, for it ruled out  butter. First created in as early as the late 1800s, it gained wide acclaim because of a particularly light, fluffy, airy texture and mild flavor. “Food of the angels”, is how people knew it then. Traditionally baked in a tube pan or bundt pan (inspired by a traditional European cake known as Gugelhupf, the pan is shaped into a distinctive doughnut form), it was typically devoured plain, but preferred toppings were a fruit compote or sauce or a light glaze; flavors that turned it heaven-bound. Topped or frosted, these angels were delicious anytime of the year.

Baked Alaska

Feature credits: ‘ Baked Alaska recipe’ by Home cooking Adventure in youtube.com on Jun. 30, 2017.

Made from sponge cake and meringue topped ice cream, this decadent dessert, rumored to have been invented as early as 1867 in New York, is quick-baked in high temperatures. The meringue cuts–off the ice cream from the heat and prevents it from  melting while it sets.

Baked Alaska first found its way into print in Fannie Farmer’s 1896 Boston cooking school cook book, though some say that the idea of baking ice cream inside cake and meringue had been around for quite some time. This science defying pud vowed the masses when introduced in the 1950s. Made with a sponge bottom, a thick layer of jam, a dollop of ice cream and a perfectly baked meringue shell, this hot- outside-cold-inside dessert had quickly turned into an impressive potluck centerpiece. For a refreshing end to a rich meal, this freezer finale never failed to draw ‘oohs and aahs’.

Banana Split

First created in 1904 the banana split was the buzz word at soda fountains all the way up to 1950’s. There were lots of ways to make one, but the classic consisted of a banana cut lengthways, served with vanilla, chocolate and strawberry ice cream, a drizzle of pineapple, chocolate and strawberry sauce, plus whipped cream and maraschino cherries or two. Chopped nuts or peanuts, fresh berries, and pineapple chunks were other traditional toppings that made this dessert stood out among the usual fare. Cool, creamy and with no last minute fuss since you pull it out from the freezer, this classic banana skillet dessert was something to look at and unbelievably delicious.

Served in a boat shaped dish, it features as a vintage throw back on diner menus even today.

Pineapple Upside down Cake

Image source: ‘Pineapple Upside-Down Cake’ by Betty Crocker Kitchens in bettycrocker.com on

This cake has a long history stretching over to may be Victorian or more. Nobody is sure! Easy as it were; fruit, sugar and other ingredients were first added into a pan, then cake batter was poured over it and cooked over medium flame; the stuff would then be dumped upside down. Times changed and so did the way it were made. Not long after a machine was invented that sliced pine apples into rings, it was introduced to this upside down cake concept. By the end of 1950’s this simple delicious dessert had made inroads on kitchen platters everywhere. Jell-O products though didn’t blink then and continued to fascinate many. But kitchens of 50’s were beginning to like to use pineapple. Dole and Del-Monte pineapple ads were showcasing ideas on how to infuse pine apples into desserts. “Pineapple upside down cakefound firmer grounds thereafter.

The 1950’s version of this cake hasn’t changed much today, but its popularity has waned over the time as the canned pineapple, once a favored convenience food – so new and easy to make desserts – also lost most in shelf space.

Unlike other dessert to many, it still tastes heavenly. If you’ve had a slice of sweet cream pie before, you would know how good it tastes. Super simple ingredients! Sugar, butter, and heavy cream…need anything more to be said?

This old-school one-plate cake is often baked in large cast iron skillet and pizza pans. Studded with diced pineapple and topped with glazed coconut and nuts, this one from a pre-boxed-mix times hums heavenly flavors to any fan of dump cake!

Peach cobbler

Winter desserts are everybody’s favorite for they make you feel warm and cozy and satiate on a cold night. This dessert is no exception. Made in three easy steps you could try all types of fruit combinations. From blueberries, apples, pear, apricot, to mixed berries, just everything makes it look stunning and insanely yummy.

Although the dessert of baked fruits topped with biscuit dough has been around for ages, it came to be associated with the culinary renaissance of the 1950s. This was the time when adverts for tinned peaches were everywhere. Refreshing as it were with a smooth and sweet topping of whipped cream and light ice cream, a layer of diced peaches in it balanced out everything perfectly. The crust held the perfect touch of saltiness with a slight cinnamon flavor. No wonder this dessert checked out perfectly on all boxes; crunchy, sweet and salty, creamy, fruity; it’s got all you would ever want!

Made with fresh or canned peaches, a classic peach cobbler is never a miss even to this day. Prepared with fruits or savory filling, all baked in a large dish, covered with nuts and glorious sweetened peaches on the bottom and cakey goodness on top, this delightful lazy day cobbler could become your re-treat in no time!

Banana Foster

Image source: ‘ Banana foster’ in cookist.com

Sautéed bananas floating in a dreamy sauce of caramelized sugar and rum and topped with thawing vanilla ice cream! Would there be a more romantic dessert than this? Then there’s a flame too, to bring in the hype.

This sticky caramelized dessert first appeared at Brennan’s restaurant in early 50’s and was named after the New Orleans Crime Commission chairman Richard Foster for whom it was created. This ready-in-10 minutes dessert made from bananas and vanilla ice cream, all trumped up with a sauce of butter, brown sugar, cinnamon, dark rum, and banana liqueur, was so easy to whip up after dinner. Firm, ripe bananas sautéed in a rum-infused caramel sauce were flambéed tableside and spooned over with vanilla ice cream. A pinch of cinnamon thrown onto the sauce as it flamed, forged a visual treat with an extra bit of drama!

An iconic delicious dessert of mildly cooked bananas bathed in a gooey spiced caramel sauce and drizzled over vanilla ice cream, this remains the most favored decadent rum laced treat since good o’l days. You can order it from the menu even today. Spoon it over French toast, waffles or crepes and switch peaches, pears or cherries, for banana and the twist in flavors is so magical and refreshing. But hell!. Then it won’t be a banana foster any longer!

Garlic pudding

Feature credits: ‘Garlic Kheer’ by Times food in youtube.com on May 05, 2021.

When we say retro, the first thought that crosses our minds is something exotic and classic in an antique way; some long forgotten decadent treat that has retained its culinary appeal; is of high quality and represents the irresistibly best of its kind.

Garlic pudding is one such legendary dessert from Awadhi kitchens, which was not given a name, because the chefs didn’t want to reveal the secret ingredient in there. Its remarkable and intriguing history dates back to Mughal royal kitchens. With an unmistakable touch of silky flavors and mesmerizing textures, this all Indian signature dessert has somehow weathered the changing trends and has not lost on its heavenly appeal.

 Lehsun ki kheer” is a rich concoction of milk, dry fruits, and of course -the quintessential garlic. Rice pudding has always been an integral part of Indian cuisine and this one, because of the secret ingredient garlic, was not revealed until the late 40s. Still nonplussed!! Wondering how can garlic be used in a truly amazing dessert when it smells strong and has pungent flavor?

The smell incidentally is washed-off as garlic cloves undergo a hot bath and pungency is only a faint hint as the pudding is served cold with a handful of dry fruits as toppings. The flavor is something out of the box! The thick consistency of milk, the creaminess and the taste of cardamom, saffron and dry fruits, all make it  taste more  like an almond pudding. That mild pungency of garlic essentially helps to make this extreme dessert more subtle and light.

Kabishambardhana Burfi (Fudge)

Image source: ‘Top 20 Vintage Food Of India’ by superadmin in crazymasalafood.com on Ap.13, 2017.

The word Kabishambardhana means “Honors of the Poet “in Bengali. This historic recipe was prepared by the niece of India’s greatest poet and writer, “The Bard of Bengal ” Nobel Laureate Rabindranath Tagore, to celebrate his 50th birthday. It was his favorite sweet dish. This recipe traditionally originated from Kolkata but failed to make much of a headway as it was closely guarded and only few knew about it .

All cauliflower!! Would you have ever dreamed of a sweet made out of mild tasting, slightly nutty and crunchy textured veggie? Today this unique fudge is nowhere to be found on the menu and you need to spoil yourself in the kitchen to make it and enjoy.

Easy and simple, this fudge requires only two ingredients, cauliflower and khoya or milk solids. Making the latter is simple but takes minimum two hours from scratch to finish. Switch to condensed milk, If you find that too onerous. Either ways you get a decadent dessert which is simply yum. Gluten free and mouthwatering, this barfi (soft fudge) doesn’t ask much of brain wracking and is a simple homespun fare. Adding saffron is optional and it will give a lovely hue along with the rich aroma. 

Ricotta Pancakes in cardamom syrup

Malpuas or ricotta pancakes share an unmistakable special seat in every Indian kitchen and is a delight for innate connoisseurs around the World. Gluten free, rich, tender and indulgent; every bite of this creamy dessert soaked in cardamom syrup and sprinkled with pistachios make for an ethereal dessert and is an extravagance in taste! Similar to American hotcakes-wonderfully thick and fluffy and with just the right kind of light texture from the ricotta- these pancakes never fail to spark the craving for more.

But unlike the American peers, their popularity dates back to an era, that is best remembered as Vedic times. In Rigveda, there is a mention of ‘Apupas made of barley flour and honey. Undeterred and densely influenced, these delightful pancakes have travelled through the times and have matured to this day to relive the awe of forgotten times.

Made using flour, spices and milk solids or paneer (fresh Indian cottage cheese) these pancakes get their golden hue after being deep fried in ghee (clarified butter) and then dunked in cardamom or saffron flavored sugar syrup. Just to remember you or if you didn’t know; saffron contains pharmacologically active compounds that render notably potent antioxidant activity.

For a twist, a stack of these gratifying crêpes comes with the cardamom scented blueberry sauce for an indulgent brunch or fruity dessert. Top them with seasonal fruit and a drizzle of maple syrup, if you want a more evolved ‘sweet-afters’. There are still plenty of variations to be found; some have fruits like banana and pineapple mixed to the batter, others blend rice or barley flour with honey as a sweetener. A combination of spices like pepper, ginger, fennel and saffron are also used both in the batter and sugar syrup. Served with a garnish of chopped almonds and pistachios, it gets a Shineroad twist when accompanied with a creamy non dairy layering.

Magic Jell-O Dessert

Feature credits: ‘1950’s Magic Jell-O Dessert’ by Recipelion in youtube.com on Dec.27, 2016.

When it comes to dessert, sometimes we like a bit of nostalgia. Take a step back in time and you will find that some of the very best desserts from way-back-when came from golden agers. Somehow, they felt so comforting and filling, yet remained inexpensive!

It was the decade of 50’s that some staples of cuisine like macaroni and cheese were swaying the food connoisseurs; some of them immensely popular. People were also head-over-heels in love with Jell-O. Magic Jell-O Dessert had turned super popular then and it’s not difficult to see why? It was a show stopper that tasted stellar. Besides, the families of the 1950s were no longer afraid of crazy creativity in the kitchen and had come to value comfort foods.

So much was happening to good o’l school treats that they fell in and out of favors, yet remained just as delicious as ever. With simple ingredients, vintage desserts were both visually appealing and crazy easy. Jell-O in fact was easily a must have at any dinner or potluck party. Because everyone loved it there was always something for every taste. Cool things like slushies, chocolate pudding cats, dirt cups, and lollipop jiggles were creating fun for those who knew how to indulge in a yummy dessert that’s also fat-free and low-calorie. The excitement was virtually contagious!

Boiling water and gelatin blended for 30 secs and combined with cold water and ice cubes, never failed to spin the magic. Some more gelatin was stirred in till ice melted partially. A few hours of deep freeze, and everything was set nice and firm to enjoy.

Plain Jell-O and sweet Jell-O salads are still widely consumed and are reminiscent of the desserts from fabulous fifties.

Boston cream pie

Image source: ‘Gluten-Free Boston Cream Pie’ by Betty Crocker Kitchens in bettycrocker.com.

The French pastry chef who created this pie at Boston’s Parker House hotel as early as mid 19th century, wouldn’t have imagined that well over a century later, this sponge cake layered with cream and iced with vanilla and chocolate fondant would still be doing rounds; even finding fame in doughnut flavor. The unwavering appeal of two layers of golden sponge cake sandwiching thick custard and all topped with a ganache glaze of chocolate, in fact owed its visibility to the Betty Crocker Mix from the 1950s. But traditional or not, it’s simply irresistible.

Moist and tender, this trifle is a very old concoction, but the variations since 50s have turned it into a classic occasion-ready centerpiece today. Even those loyal to traditional Parker house version are not going to miss eclectic flavors pinned down in this sublime dessert.

Red Velvet Cake

If only you could recall the onslaught of red velvet desserts that peaked in the 50s! A ruby red cake with cream cheese frosting and a storied history as old as Victorian, it rose to fame after being served at the Waldorf-Astoria in the 1930s. Red velvet’s origins are in fact mixed up with a more visually subtle dessert. This was America’s first chocolate cake that depended more on the science of baking for its color than a pinch of edible dye. A perfect throwback milk frosting had found everybody falling hard for it then in the 1950s.

Cream cheese frosting is the fun-fact hype on red velvet cake these days. Classic whipped cream frosting though is still everybody’s call for a more balanced sweetness. A cloud of meringue piled sky-high over lemon-curd filling makes this  meals-after a best seller.

Chocolate Chiffon Cake

Image source: ‘Chocolate Chiffon Cake with Cocoa Cream Filling’ by Jennifer in totallychefs.com

If you are keen for a potluck dessert that stands out from the rest, this is the cake you ought to be looking for. As adverted by General Mills “the first really new cake in 100 years”, the chiffon cake were everywhere in the late 1950s. Standing tall and elegant and put together in oil instead of traditional butter, this super soft rich textured kuchen was baked in a cake tin with a metal tube in the middle to help it rise high.

Drenched in a succulent chocolate glaze, with an airy texture and simmering flavors of coconut ginger, even to this day it’s a ravishing and unforgettable finish to your meals.

Coconut Cream Pie

Image source: ‘Triple-Threat Coconut Cream Pie. by Pillsbury Kitchens in pillsbury.com.

If you love pies, this one just got added to your list! Just think of it as a Samoa cookie in pie form. It’s easy pat-in rich grainy crust, fills-in old fashioned coconut cream and is topped with a fluffy meringue. Sporting airy texture and out-of-this-world coconut-ginger flavor, it’s a delightful end to meals each time, every time.

Whensoever you need an impressive potluck worthy dessert for a special occasion, turn to this one! Creamy and full of coconut flavor all confined within a delicious crust and topped with fresh whipped cream; it’s always a hard to resist favorite.

Bonus: Torch it, for even more drama!!

Classic finger buns

If there is one baked treat from 50s that could stir up nostalgia from childhood days, it is Finger buns aka iced buns. A sweet staple from Aussie bakeries, these yeasted buns, filled with raisins and coated with pink ice cream and desiccated coconut was every child’s idea of slice of heaven on plate. Made from enriched dough, the soft and fluffy delights were somewhat similar to French Brioche but were less buttery.

Up-market versions these days go all out and use a mix of raisins and dried currants. Even dried sour berries and cranberries find preferences sometimes. But make no mistake! these buns are popular for one good reason. The combination of fluffy sweet, sticky bread bun laced on the top with a thick layer of butter cream icing and a sprinkle of cinnamon sugar, is a celebration of flavors; once and always!

From potluck pies and box cakes of 50’s to cake pops and liquid nitrogen desserts of 90’s to trendy delights of this century, our preferences for sweet course have changed hugely. Yet desserts from bygone times continue to trigger some of the sweetest, happiest food related memories. If or not you grew up in the middle of the last century, as I did and feel some nostalgia stirring within when it comes to desserts, then perhaps you are curious to know which desserts had caught everybody fancy then. What fascinations romanticized platters and caught every family’s attention as they sat together for a quaint meal each day and finished it with a delicious fun filled sweet? Answers are many, but few are worthy of a rally. There wasn’t much of a health craze then, but home cooks from the 1950s had created some delicious treats that never lost their appeal and many are still around today. From Peeps to Peanuts M&M to Chocolate and Root beer Dumdums; every authentic bunch of desserts  has earned a comeback. For me, these were certainly some sweet discoveries that debuted in the best decade of all times. 

So sit back after a dinner soirée, relax and enjoy them. This is your moment for a fun-filled time travel to fantastic fifties with wobbly, gooey, frozen, silky wonders; all reborn with a twist!

15 potluck worthy dream desserts that will make you quit calorie counting!

From warm, moist and cinnamon flavored waffles topped with Nutella or Belgian pearl sugar to soft and spongy, melt in the mouth gulab jamun… is there anything better?

Like everybody else, a warm lazy day to me means hanging out and lots of outdoor eating. Guess I might find it easy to throw in a few sandwiches together or fire up the grill or dream of juicy BBQ meats and grilled veggies at tabletop spreads, but like everybody says, the best part of a meal comes at the end!

This is when the sweet tooth begins to throb! It’s time to break out tubs of chilly homemade ice cream or indulgent cakes layered with fresh seasonal fruit!  But more lip smacking options are equally tempting!!! From delicious green tomato pie and flavorful strawberry shortcakes that would look gorgeous on any table, to an icebox cake, a fruit-filled pie or even jello with toppings of fresh fruits like strawberries, cherries and peaches, all would seemingly make any backyard BBQ feel timeless. Abundance of choice is bewildering.

A classic comfort food always brings a delicious end to every meal. If you ever get stuck up with options for something sugary yet healthy, don’t despair! There are several taste easy and quick desserts to slake your sugar rush. Cool, innovative and plumb delightful, these fat-easy guilt free cakes, shakes, ice-creams, sorbet or waffles are so utterly delicious that you wouldn’t even know they were healthy if not told!

But should you be quitting calorie tracking before indulging? Is sugary binge so frightening after all? We all know it’s not sustainable long term but for waist watchers every bite matters! Let’s find out if this food freedom talk is anything but a weary prop!

If only you could ace binging: Easy and healthy!!

How would you know if your occasional overindulgence is not a serious binging issue? It’s likely that you may find isolated runs as normal but binge eating is something that needs to be watched over. More than food, it’s your changing mindset that could make you ditch your diet plans.

Of course, all of us are mindful enough to listen to our bodies and recognize when it is enough. Keep tabs though. It helps; but everything about it is simply exhausting. Stop or miss it even for a day and the scales become alive and threaten!

Eventually your ability to trust yourself turns punishing enough and would push you to eat much. This is when you need to stop. Don’t let counting calories turn into an obsession. Learn to live with yourself. Usually the weight that you eye or envy is always thinner than what your body wants to be. Besides, if you don’t binge with so many trigger foods around you and keep tracking calories, then it’s not worth it. It’s neither healthy for your body nor your mind. So, just let the fun happen. Life is just too short to miss it. 

And desserts are desserts!! It’s never over till you have sunk your teeth in some ‘Butter dainties’ or that timeless classic Tiramisu or a deliciously inventive and iconic Kheer, or that unforgettable fresh and thirst-quenching Lemon semifreddo.’ Social eating or not, these delectable summery treats would make anybody happy. You just cannot go wrong with these simple heavenly delights.

Tiramisu

Feature credits: ‘ Tiramisu Cake’ by Nino’s home in youtube.com on Oct.17, 2020.

Literally meaning “cheer me up” or “pull me up,” tiramisu is a timeless classic no-bake coffee flavored patisserie that has sponge cake ladyfingers soaked in coffee and liqueur and the mascarpone cream layer. Lady Fingers are essentially sponge cake batter piped into strips then baked and dried into biscuits. Also known as “savoiardi” these absorb the syrup well without getting soggy. Absolutely perfect for a dessert plate!

Mascarpone is essentially the Italian version of whipped cream cheese, stabilized with lemon juice or citric acid.  Smooth in consistency and mildly flavored, this cheese though has twice as much fat as cream cheese.

Blending the bold flavors of cocoa and espresso with savory mascarpone cheese and wine and layered with ladyfinger biscuits, this dessert is a lavish display of forgiving ingredients and unforgettable flavor combinations.

Try it for once and much the same way like English trifle, you may not wait for another time to dig in this treat again!

Blackberry cheesecake

Image source: ‘Vegan, No bake Blackberry Cheesecake’ by Eva in thehealthytart.com

Blackberry cheesecake is essentially a creamy vanilla cheesecake with a hint of lemon in it. With swirls of fresh blackberry sauce, it is baked on golden Oreo cookie crust. The baked cheesecake makes for a perfectly healthy dessert because of its star ingredient- the blackberry. Low on carbs, the sweet blackberry sauce topping paired with the rich cheesecake filling takes the flavors beyond delicious! Still looking for a twist!

Just swirl the luscious blackberry sauce and add crunch with a scattering of honeycomb. Or simply try with fresh blackberries and clotted cream.

There are so many versions of blackberry cheesecake. Crust comes topped with syrupy blackberries before filling is poured. Blackberries are baked right into the filling itself. A strained blackberry puree ‘is added to the filling to create a beautiful purple masterpiece.  Swirls of blackberry puree make lovely designs on the top of the cake and turns this treat irresistible.  Even the no-bake version with a crunchy biscuit base all covered in a delicate cheese cream and garnished with sweet and fresh blackberries will get you hooked to this delight. The ploy to keep you buried in this delight is simply awesome and thick!

 Lemon semifreddo

Image source: ‘Lemon and yogurt semi freddo’ in realfood.tesco.com.

If you’re looking for a fresh, thirst quenching dessert, this fragrant and delicate yet simple Italian inspired dessert is the perfect sweet treat for you.

Semifreddo is an Italian word meaning “half cold.” Light and airy with a texture of  mousse, this frozen layered terrine is an ideal dessert that is so easy to pull out, slice, and serve. Traditionally made by heating sugar to 248 degrees F. (this is when the sugar turns firm and flexible), then whisked into egg and finally folding the egg white mixture into whipped cream, semifreddo could also be made by using the French meringue method of simply whisking sugar into egg whites. Both inspire the same goodness.

Want to try something that comes with a twist! Light chewy meringue, crumbled into luscious whipped cream, lemon curd and Greek yogurt is a classic dish amongst the semi frozen desserts. Laced with a drizzle of honey and few fresh berries, this lush creamyhungry for more’ eat has an intensely lemony flavor and is super refreshing.

And don’t confuse it with ice cream. They are similar but different too! Ice cream is frozen first and then air is pushed in, whereas semifreddo is whisked first and then frozen which makes it feel like half frozen.

Matcha Green Tea Frozen Yogurt

It’s the frozen yogurt that shines better than ice cream and sorbet! The Matcha Green Tea Frozen Yogurt is stuffed with antioxidants and protein, made only with natural ingredients, is vegan and claims a modest 277 kcal for each serve (half cup). Packed with irresistible flavors, this exotic super food is a sure way to keep your days supercharged!

Matcha is the fine grounded tea leaves that speeds up your metabolism. The tea’s natural buzz makes this frozen dessert a natural energy booster. Heavy on green tea flavor, the vanilla vodka is optional if you want it to be soft and velvety. An awesome healthy alternative to ice-cream, you can devour it as flavored yoghurt too! Try honey vanilla flavored yogurt if you prefer mild.

Gelato

Image source: ‘The Easiest Homemade Strawberry Gelato ‘ by Gemma Stafford in biggerbolderbaking.com on Jun. 11, 2020.

Walk around any upscale business district and you’re bound to pass faces buried deep in creamy, frozen desserts, unaware that when it comes to eating healthy, it’s better to skip dessert or may be reserve a slice of Banana Split for cheat days. But probably everybody seems to have found out which dessert works best for them. Lower calorie ice creams and frozen yogurt treats like gelato have run rogue and are hot favorites now.

Although it is difficult to tell the difference from a distance, both ice cream and it’s more densely flavored cousin- Gelato, are quite distinct. Made with a base of 3.25% whole milk and sugar, gelato has fewer calories, less sugar and lower fat content per serving than ice cream. A typical 3.5 oz. serving of vanilla gelato contains 90 calories and 3 grams of fat, compared to 125 calories and 7 grams of fat in vanilla ice cream. Much silkier and less denser than ice cream, gelato comes in an array of flavors that include raspberry, pistachio, rum, and chocolate usually packing flavors from natural sources.

So, should you be breaking out your spoons now? Not so fast! gelato has a much lower fat content of around 4–9% but packs more sugar than ice cream  and often use of  real fruit or fruit juice increases the carbs . Since it is a fairly dense, calories stack up fast. Be wary! portion control is a must if you’re on a crash diet and yet want to dig in! Low fat ice cream could soothe your cravings but if you are a fan of flavors, a small serve of gelato is just great. It won’t wreck your diet plans and Probiotics in yogurt will have some pay-offs for your health too.

Belgian waffle

Alone and have a sudden rush for dessert!  Try Belgian waffle or better still a Nutella waffle. This deep pocket sugary treat is simply delicious!! Coming straight out of Belgian street food fame books, this buttery treat tastes best when eaten warm and topped with powdered sugar or Nutella.  Crispy on the outside and fluffy on the inside, Belgian waffles are reckoned a brunch superstar.  Cooked in a hot griddle with a grid pattern, the original Belgian version has bigger and deeper pockets than the regular ones which are a wee bit smaller in size. Sometimes the only difference between different types of waffles is the number of squares pressed. Light and fluffy, the authentic Liege waffles are made with dough and include bits of caramelized Belgian pearl sugar. Try them with maple syrup or fruit and be shocked with a delicious tsunami of flavors.

Gulab Jamun

Image source: ‘Gulab Jamun Recipe’ by TNN in recipes.timesofindia.com on Jun.2, 2021.

While some of you might not want to change their lifestyle or say ‘Yes’ to clean eating fearing it would mean giving up your favorite foods; desserts make things even harder.

Saying goodbye to your favorite foods has never been so easy. And I have to say, it definitely is not a small compromise. Fortunately you need not always be into fray to eat healthy. All you should do is opt for real, whole ingredients and adjust your favorite portions a little bit not to go overboard. And this definitely applies to desserts that quickly add up the calories. But then there are a few exceptions that are deliciously healthified.

Soft and spongy, gulab jamun is one such melt in the mouth desert made from milk solids that are reduced to the consistency of soft dough. Shaped into small balls, fried and then dunked in delicately flavored sugar syrup mixed with cardamom and rose water, it is a lip smacking insight to flavors of traditional Indian desserts, every time you dig in. Be wary though of how much of it you can polish off. Flavors do not betray calories!

Garnished with nuts such as almonds and served hot, each ball of gulab jamun contains about 125 calories. Of this carbs are 90 calories, proteins about 9 and remaining 25 calories come from fat. In fact each serve of 2 pieces provides about 6 % of daily calorie requirement of a standard adult diet of 2000 calories. So watch out for this silky sweet  dessert before it makes a kill of your diet plan !!

Lamington

Image source: ‘Lamington Cake’ by Kristina Vanni in thespruceeats.com on Sep.29, 2020.

An ode to classic Aussie cooking, these dessert squares consist of butter cake or yellow sponge cake coated in chocolate sauce and then rolled into coconut flakes. The thin mixture when absorbed into the outside of the sponge cake and left to set, gives the dessert a distinctive texture. Cut into small squares, this white cake delicacy is dipped in a sweet chocolate frosting and then dunked in dried coconut flakes. It would often remind you of a chocolate and coconut covered cake doughnut that has been crafted into a delightful masterpiece. Even its namesake Lord Lamington -Governor of Queensland from 1896 – 190l, would have been at his wits end had he foreseen how popular these dessert bites were to become.

Kheer (Indian rice pudding)

Image source: ‘Rice Kheer | Indian Rice Pudding (6 ingredients, gluten-free)’ in honeywahtscooking.com on Oct. 19, 2020.

The sweet and creamy cardamom scented Indian rice pudding often served as delicious side dish or dessert – hot or cold, owes its richness to a thick and creamy base of whole milk that has been reduced to half during the preparation of this decadent treat. 

Kheer, also called Rice payasam, is one peculiar dessert that traces back its history to many different cultures. Mexicans have Arroz con Leche, Lebanese call it Moghli, and the Greeks have come out with a similar dish, rizogalo. The English have their own version of this dish and call it porridge

So flavorful and yummy, the rice pudding first originated during Tudor period in United Kingdom with the recipe first documented in 1615. Variations over the period and regions however all agree on key ingredients rice, milk, cream, and sugar though differ in flavoring and techniques involved.

Rice pudding is at best one of the most underrated desserts. So, how it is made insanely irresistible? The secret is combining it with chia pudding, a staple that’s good for gut and is filled with healthy fats and proteins. Here it makes the rice pudding give you a stick-to-your-ribs satisfaction without being at all heavy. The mix of rose, pistachio, and cardamom add the rich yummy flavor combinations.

Fresh Pumpkin Ice Cream

Image source: ‘Pumpkin Ice Cream’ by Makinze Gore in delish.com on Sep. 11, 2019.

Whoever said low-calorie desserts are not as good as regular ones, has probably never tried fresh pumpkin ice cream. Full of warm pumpkin flavors and just the right amount of richness, this one could be your pick of a spot-on creamy, sweet and delicious dessert. It’s amazing how a cup of canned unsweetened pumpkin puree’ with all the toasty flavors of pumpkin pie in a chilly ice cream, could turn into a perfect fall themed clean-eating dessert with prep time of 15 minutes only.

Vegan, dairy-free, and gluten-free, this is the dream ice cream for all the pumpkin spice fans. With 158 kcal per serve (125 gms),  this ice cream needs little garnishing though a grating of cinnamon stick would make a smart gig and add a bit more of spicy oomph. Drizzle of pumpkin shake with milk, maple syrup and bourbon and toppings of warm butter-pecan sauce or candied pepitas (pumpkin seeds) add some zest to the dish. So dig into a scoop of pancakes or waffles topped with this mushy ice cream and swoon over a decadent brunch! 

Peach Ice Cream

Peach Ice Cream is one summertime classic after eat, that has so often bowled over even the most impassioned food critique. Rich, creamy and so luscious, the peaches make it take on a deeper, richer flavor and become even sweeter. Roasted and cooled down before being added to the mix makes it easier to eat pieces of peach in the ice cream.

Yet another variant has maple syrup blended in to deepen the flavor. This actually enhances the flavor of peaches without tasting like if maple syrup has been added to it. Coming together in a matter of minutes without spending a lot of time prepping it, this vegan, gluten free goes easy with the calories at 87 kcal per serve.

 Lemon Blueberry Sorbet

Image source: ‘Blueberry Sorbet’ by Elise Bauer in simplyrecipes.com on Feb. 10, 2021.

Try this super easy, low-sugar, and perfect Lemon Blueberry Sorbet to muzzle your sweet craving. A delightful treat with great fruity taste minus the extra calories and refined sugars, this blend of wild Maine blueberries, lemon juice, zest and water, turn the sorbet into a wrap up of refreshing, light, any time dessert for health freaks. If you want a dessert option with still lesser calories than 98 kcals standard, try the one with a drizzle of honey. Lemons on the other hand add a bit of tartness and complete the whole flavor profile.

And for all we know, blueberries do wonders to our health. So, all you need is to grab a spoon and dig in!

Raspberry Sorbet

Image source: ‘Raspberry Sorbet’ in bhg.com.

Raspberry sorbet is a great option when you crave for a dessert but have no appetite for processed sugars and fats in traditional desserts. Made with raw honey, raspberries, lemon juice and water, this sorbet is one light, refreshing frozen treat that makes for one of the best easy healthy dessert.

Raw honey for added sweetness or lemon juice for a little pop of flavor  add punch to this fruity upgraded version of a fruit snack. And using good, fresh raspberries full of pectin make all the difference! A great choice, this fruit makes for a yummy, creamy, and almost ice-cream like delightful sorbet. 

Chocolate Banana Ice Cream

Feature credits: ‘Healthy 3 Ingredient Chocolate Banana Ice Cream’ by The Endless Meal in youtube.com on July 07, 2018.

Do you ever want a sweet treat but couldn’t without feeling guilty about eating it? This chocolate banana ice cream is just what could be the right choice for you. When it comes to healthy dessert options, I don’t think it gets any easier than this chocolate banana ice cream. Outrageously flavorful, this in fact is not really an ice cream; it’s a faux ice cream. With 2 simple ingredients and 110 kcals for 2 serves (0.5 cup each), this ice cream is definitely a health dream. The consistency is very similar to ice cream but it doesn’t contain dairy or sugar. When ripe frozen bananas and cocoa powder are blitzed together until smooth, you get to taste a creamy, guilt-free, scrumptious frozen treat. Besides, it’s gluten-free and vegan!

Raspberry Lemon Chia Cheesecake

Feature credits: ‘Raspberry cheesecake’ by Thy Than in youtube.com on May 07, 2021.

Just because you are in a healthy lifestyle or a cleansing detox doesn’t mean that you have to let go the desserts form your daily eats. Merely be a little wiser in your choices and there is no dearth of ways to slake your sugar rush without harming your health goals.

Besides, the good news is that are a host of dessert options that are healthy. You might say that what is healthy need not necessarily be good in taste and healthy ones usually do not taste as good as the unhealthy ones. But for once, I beg to differ. A bite of this nutritious scrumptious cheesecake will make you think twice.

With a nut-date base, cashew and coconut milk filling and raspberry chia jam topping, this dessert is your perfect rescue for healthy eating. And need you be reminded of how chia does wonders to our health? Pick this dessert when you crave for something sweet and you are good to go. Trust me; you won’t get overdosed with sugar either!

Feature credits:’20 best desserts around the world’ by the crazy trips in youtube.com on Jun.20,2019.

While it’s amazing no matter where you have it, desserts differ from country to country. Some are light and fruity, some rich and chocolaty. From Japan’s mochi to Poland’s poppy seed rolls, each has the punch to muzzle any sweet tooth.

Let’s face it—sooner or later you too could be hit with that craving for something sweet.  So, take a moment here to wax some admiration for those simple healthy desserts where sugar does not make the overkill!

It may be difficult to find a perfect classic dessert for your fancied sweet blast, but these ones are pretty close. Few are though served drizzled with sugar, honey or maple syrup, often dunked in chocolate sauce or where even yogurt is rather set aflame with vanilla vodka. If you find them deep on calories, you might want to be careful to have your pick and get it served with a whirl.

Whatever…get your back with a few of these jaw dropping healthilicious desserts to slake your sugar rush and spare yourself a knock -over in Jacob’s feast!

Five reasons why your pursuit of happiness may be flawed and elusive!!

Find out what bedevils your quest and learn how to get that twinkle-toed happiness back in your life.

We humans are complex life forms in a beautiful way. Put us in an intimate, passionate relationship and that seductive crush gets all hyped-up. We reckon awareness and acceptance as thumb prints and adore the quest for happiness, better still; most desirable. Perhaps spending more time with our kinds, getting a more fulfilling and secure job, or even improving our health is the reason we consider happiness a worthy pursuit. After all, being happy feels good. But do we build our lives on that reasoning alone?

Feature credits:’ Happiness with nature’ by Vigorswitch in youtube.com on Aug. 26, 2020.

Deep inside, we all treasure a fascinating tale of lifestyle and feelings, raring to be heard and appreciated. In fact, looking for an opportunity to engage and be recognized for that distinct wharf of ours, nourishes and strengthens us or at times weakens breaks or crushes us. Perhaps maximizing happiness is the only reason, we chase it. Still perceptions bump and make it so easy for us to get sad or depressed.

You think of yourself as a frightful and appalling person

We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. You may wish for a better life; maybe much better of it. But it is not always perfect for you. Sufferings turn ugly once you mentally label them as a bad situation. The emotional trauma that follows cuts you off from the vigour of life. So, once you get mired neck deep in a miserly spot that sucks, your downhill spiral begins, howsoever much you shout to the World that you are perfect and the best.

This however, doesn’t mean that you throw your hands in the air and let that moment pass by when you could reach out and grab happiness. You can still be contented and happy. Just let go of that dreary thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on. Accept yourself with utmost honesty the way you are and you will give others 10 reasons to envy you. Once the clouds of denial are gone, the magic of acceptance and contentment will unfold in your life. Just be the true rendition of self improvement and learn to love yourself.

You have sucked your soul out for long

I have a friend who never tires of talking and in most conversations he is the only one who seems to be interested in things he has to say. So, people tend to avoid his company and maybe he knows how uncomfortable sometimes it becomes. But I find him one happy person who has shaken himself awake and enthused his perspective from negative to positive outlook. Next day he could be found talking nineteen to the dozen in another gathering! I think he see the things in his life as a glass that is half full  rather than half empty, and never miss out on moments that tend to make him happy.

Happy or otherwise, we all have choice as to how we spend our live. It’s our perspective that does the picking. Nothing changes for us unless we decide to take pleasure from life and live every moment as a blessing. We all know that our moods are fleeting and their causes uncertain but we also appreciate that a life spent experiencing happiness, is in some ways a good life. The concern though, is not what happiness means to you, but instead why it eluded you and how to get it.

We tend to see happiness as inconsistent to sadness or depression, suggesting that being happy means few woes and fewer regrets. If we remain contented to see the things in our life as a glass that is half empty, rather than half full, we tend to miss out on the opportunities that may be present around us. Not accepting challenges and considering them as bad consequences would never let you grow out of your miseries.

 “Unhappy is he who depends on success to be happy,” Alex Dias Ribeiro.

As successful as you are or hope to be in your life and work, be sure that you will find happiness only in things that are deeply ordinary; enjoying a walk or a conversation with a loved one or plucking turnips and tomatoes from kitchen garden. For few who worship hard work or strive to outperform, this may sound like an admission of defeat. But accepting things as they happen and facing challenges head on makes you find meaning in them and move forward. So, get interested; it’s time you started living with gusto and made the most of today.

“Today is life– the only life you are sure of”.-Dale Carnegie.

You are yet to open up your mind and heart to life

Lately you have been torn up in your mind and heart. You have been questioning yourself quite uncomfortably. “Am I ill-mannered?”, “Do I always sound argumentative?”, “Do I talk too loud?”, “Does my breath smell?”, “Do I ever bore others when in company?”

Lending ears to comments and criticisms and not treating them with rejoinders like, “Don’t exaggerate! That’s just the way I am!” opens up our minds and hearts for good. It’s not how much we have in us but how much we appreciate for having it with us, rules our general state of happiness. After all life is made up of some great experiences and is a gift in our hands to nimble-toe through. Trust me; it makes the best out of inevitable for us. Each day shapes us and helps us to grow and change. So, get along, chose to be happy and live through every moment of life with grace and gratitude.

You are evasive to your ‘present’

The desire to be happy is instinctive to human nature, though it flirts and fleets. Naturally evasive, happiness is not a bad thing any more than a wine is. Both bring fun and sweetness to life when positive events like winning a lottery, promotions or even something as little as a gift from someone close to your heart, ring sweet bells in your heart or goose bumps all over.

Like it or not, being “present” for every moment shapes happiness for you. Your present is the moment where all reality is. The past is gone, the future is yet to arrive and the present is passing by. So, focus on living in and celebrating the present to the full. Live every moment of life as a blessing and you will have the greatest opportunity to experience happiness.

“When we are present and still and our minds are open, we will find that happiness is our natural state.”-Dr. Robert Puff.

The world doesn’t fall apart, every time you get hit!!

While many for us would be relieved and happy to have survived the pandemic in 2021, for others the global scourge may have caused stress meltdown and severe sufferings. The world for them would have felt like it’s upside down—literally.

We all know that anguish is an inevitable consequence of being alive. But if minimizing distress can bring happiness, it gets important to get hold of your emotional health. At least, if you can’t control it, you will always have the control over how to guard it!

Everyone experiences situations gone wrong one time or the other, but not everyone treats it in the same way. Of course, feeling stressed out sucks. It leaves you with two choices—let it suffocate you or bring the change and rewrite a new story. Remember life is a rollercoaster ride and stress will happen. So, master your sanity and good sense to ride through it. Feeling overwhelmed already? It’s time you did some soul searching and refashioned your perspective. Here are five ways to know if you do overreact to all that happens around you and wouldn’t allow yourself to manage a happy disposition.

Happiness has many faces

Our past uncannily keeps us tied down in turmoil and sadness; we are wired like that. Negativity rules over us and at times it hurts, even when you get moments of happiness in between. No denying; if you experience it, you are hanging on to the grudges and resentment of the past and could not get rid of them. Or maybe you have come up against different kinds of happiness, which do not always go together. Having too much of happiness of one sort could spoil your ability to have enough space for other. For instance, you could be butting heads how to balance career and family all together and in turn could be equally unhappy in both lives. This could be significantly damaging to yourself and those around you.

Empathy is one buzzword though, that could help. As Sadhguru puts it, walk away from your past wiser, not wounded”. A dire need for approval in the past has left you vulnerable and your fragile self esteem is weighed down.  Your chances of experiencing happiness have vanished.  So, declutter your past conflicts. Stay motivated and enjoy the life to the fullest; no matter what happens-good or bad. Help yourself to grow and change and chose to be happy. Of course, you cannot forget or wipe out your gloomy past but those very crises best increase your chances of success in pursuit to happiness.

Happiness addict’ prefer being special over being successful

In short, keep moving with life and see it as a blessing than be damned. Enjoy it and have a whale of a time while you can. Unfortunate things happen sometimes, but so do some great things. Try not to react much to whatever is happening around you. Don’t grind yourself and be serious about how others sleep on it. You are just not being authentic or legit. Even to put on a show could ruin your chances to be happy. Live life like an adventure, Explore and plan it the way you want to. Sometimes you may even need to laugh at yourself.

Feature credits: ‘Relax with the beauty of nature’ by the Whole Happy Life in youtube.com on Mar.21,2020.

So smile as much as you can, laugh often, hang out with mates and above all just try not to be fussy or play ducks and drakes. Make the best of what you have and keep growing.

“Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive”-Elbert Hubbard

15 classic Asian comfort foods for the summery days you crave takeouts.

Miss the bite of extravagance and you wouldn’t know the ultimate joy of filling up!!

Sometimes we all need delicious comfort food! Like when life gives you lemon, make lemonade. Or get some good comfort food! Or maybe both! Doesn’t it feel good to reach out to a yummy comforting meal after a long hard day and enjoy it? Perched up nice and cool in a refreshing restaurant or sitting cozy in your living room and enjoying food; doesn’t summery nights and delicious takeouts truly sum up the day with a punch of happiness?

Besides, there’s nothing that a hot plate of comfort food can’t solve. Unwell, going through a bad break, work stress or just plain bad day? The aroma of freshly cooked veggie crumbles and sweet and spicy glazed mango sriracha or BBQ-flavored vegan waffle and naturally sweetened wholegrain brownie, all just make problems vanish away.

The knock out version of Asian food is a burst of bold flavors!

No more copy cat recipes!! Fun filled Asian cuisine come with a twist each time you reach out to them and are all full of hot ideas and inundating choices. From delicious bite size pizzas to chocolate croissants, it’s hard to tell if theburger with the works is better than “Peanut BBQ sweet potato burger with avocado”. So, catch up with some iconic Asian dishes and discover if the Friends of Pho in Kolkata or Once upon a bite in Dubai and Senn Thai Comfort Food in New York city or Soul Food Mahanakorn in Watthana Bangkok could make you get hungry just looking at the photos and blow your senses over once eaten!

Though a cross kitchen between Tokyo and Texas or Shanghai and New Delhi is an obstinate possibility, upscale restaurants do treasure rundown menus from edgy cookbooks, full of diverse Asian comfort food recipes. There is Japanese-Peruvian cuisine; French patisserie, Mexican tacos, and many more crowd-pullers. From fancy take away beaneries to countless neighborhood stalls, all serve from spicy gravies, saucy noodles to legendary chicken or vegetable Manchurian and much more. With names as scrumptious as China Bowl, China Pearl, Chung Wahor Zhangs, these delights- usually batter fried and doused in chilli garlic sauce- are quintessentially soul satisfying comfort food that always come with a kick.

In Asian style cooking, simple elements like rice, noodles, fruits, and veggies are recast, blended with unique herbs and seasonings and reinvented into stunning dishes. From Japanese noodles to Chinese stir-fry to Indian naan, you just can’t run out of options for Asian-themed dines. So, spicing your weekday dinners and weekend pleasures with all things, here are the tastiest 15 such Asian comfort foods to instantly perk up your platter!

Asian Slaw

Crisp, colorful, and wildly delicious: the Asian slaw comes packed with bright vegetables laced with an insanely good sauce that would trump any other rival. Crammed with bright vegetables like shredded cabbage, carrots, edamame, bell peppers and peanuts and flavored with scallions and cilantro, this slaw comes with a dressing of a thick, sweet-savory spicy sauce and is a perfect medley of flavors and textures. Can you imagine all those elements in one bite?

Korean popcorn chicken

Image source: ‘ Korean Popcorn Chicken’ by Julie in tastemade.com.

If you are looking for a starter that’s all fire and flavor, try this tangy, sticky and crunchy chicken popcorn inspired by the much hyped Korean street food Dakgangjeong and trust me, you just won’t have enough of these crazy fireballs! Deep-fried boneless sticky and tangy, these chicken nuggets are bite-sized salvos that’s all set to get you rolling! Made from boneless chicken fillet, this full-of-crackling food gets a typical Korean zing once tossed with tangy and spicy seasoning. The dripping hot sauce further amps up the heat  and turns these super-crunchy balls into a fiery feast!

Chicken Noodle Soup

Image source: The Ultimate Chicken Noodle Soup’ in tasteofhome.com.

A truly work of art, this soup is a bowl of chewy noodles immersed in a steaming savory broth, topped with meats and veggies. An ultimate definition of classic Asian comfort food there couldn’t be a better way to spend a balmy evening than by having a bowl or two of chicken noodle soup.

Thai Noodle Soup

Image source: ‘ Spicy Thai Curry Noodle Soup’ innheathercristo.com.

If you’ve never had it before, you’re in for a cozy surprise! A delicate mix of rice noodles, crisp veggies, and nutty peanut sauce, this soup is an insanely good dish.  It is not only about noodles cabbage, carrots and bell peppers that unfold the magic. The wizardry lies in the sauce. Thick, perfectly sweet, spicy and wonderfully nutty, this sauce is an ultimate count in finger-licking good indulgence! Bites of tender chicken, bok choy, rice noodles, cilantro, basil, lime juice and flavors of curry and coconut make this dish a perfect must-try deal.

Wonton Soup

Image source: ‘Red curry chicken wonton soup’ by Tara in tarasmulticulturaltable.com on Sep.7, 2020.

Getting tire of buffalo wings? How about a bowl of steaming Wonton soup loaded with silky flavors of seasoned chicken broth with filled wantons to ward off your worries!! An Asian equivalent of ravioli or tortellini, wontons are dumplings made with ground meat wrapped in a dumpling wrapper and steamed until cooked and tender. Served with hot broth, just one spoonful can quickly turn that frown upside down. If you’ve never have had them before, now is the time!

Gado Gado

A traditional Indonesian salad of mildly boiled, blanched or steamed veggies like carrots, red cabbage and hard boiled eggs, fried tofu, tempeh and lontong (which is a dense rice cake  wrapped inside a banana leaf. Rice is rolled inside a banana leaf and boiled, then cut into small cakes as a replacement of steamed rice). Served along with a thick spicy nutty peanut sauce, the real tweak  happens when sweet potato is used in place of carrots and green beans are switched for red cabbage. Since the salad is rice-based, it’s hearty and a full meal on its own. Build mainly on cooked veggies and meatless proteins with toppings like prawn crackers, this food is a super quick way to satisfy your craving.

Volcano Fries

Topped with spicy mayo, green onion, and a bit of seaweed, volcano fries is a sensory overload one cannot resist. Served with a generous topping of gooey cheese, crispy chicken cubes and sauce, sprinkled with Cheetos (cheese puff snack) – it’s a dish your nutritionist may frown upon, but trust me, every bite is a journey to heaven and back. With toppings of kani (crab meat) and seaweed salad, scallions, sriracha (fermented hot sauce) and Japanese mayo, the dish turns fiercer but you just shouldn’t get yourself cut loose without trying this one most indulgent food.

Crispy tofu broccoli stir fry

Feature credits: ‘Crispy tofu broccoli stir fry’ in myfoodstory.com on Nov. 16, 2020.

This 20 minutes stir fry dish is the perfect mix of protein and vegetables. Try it with quinoa when you want something light or with noodles if you want something hearty! Stir fried crispy tofu and fresh veggies like broccoli and spinach sautéed in a quick and easy garlic sesame sauce, give this dish all the markings of an easy and healthy food that you can turn to again and again. With firm and flavorful tofu, fresh and colorful veggies all drenched in just enough sauce to coat the tofu and broccoli so that crunchiness stays intact; this salty savory dish is one comfort food that you can always tag to your bucket list!

Vegan Cheesesteak sandwich

This vegan sandwich with mushrooms smothered in gooey cheese sauce creates a whole food that brings you a great taste, some protein and a great texture; all in 20 minutes. A low-calorie, easy to make mushroom cheesesteak sandwich is all you need when your sandwich craving hits the ceiling. Mimicking the meat base, slices of Portobello mushroom sautéed with a thicket of peppers and onions, then tucked into a toasted roll and drenched with a bit of melted provolone, mark it as a great vegetarian dish that wouldn’t decimate your diet plan. Eat this for seven days a week and you could still end up thinner than when you started. What more, you don’t even have to be a vegetarian to enjoy it!

Scallion Pancake

Feature credits: ‘kitchenstories.com.

Crisp on the outside, fluffy on the inside and wonderfully savory all over, scallion pancakes are a popular food that has a crispy, flaky texture and is a new twist on regular pancakes. Made out of an unleavened flatbread and stuffed with scallions or green onions or spring onions, cilantro and sesame, these pancakes are truly addictive. Crispy, flaky, and with the *slightest* bit of chew, wh