Tag Archives: #Fear

You Are An Incredibly Protean Person If You Can Chase A Million Dreams Together!

It’s one way street. You’ll tick for sure! But you being multifaceted is the very reason people will think of you as fake, crazy and more sardonically -unhinged. It’s your duality of being warm and cold when necessary that ruffles the feathers.

Image source: ‘The Top 8 Things People Desperately Desire But Can’t Seem To Attain’ by Kathy Caprino in forbes.com

And yet there are ways to assert that two can exist at once.

I chose the word “unstoppable” not because it easily distracts from more mundane things but because I need to be more focused and prioritize what is most important to me. If I can get in the flow by focusing on one thing at a time without taking my eyes off the unseeable, I think I’m unstoppable.

I chose the word unstoppable” because it lends me the power over my choices and the consequences that follow. The choices that I make are meant to impact others and they can also affect who I become.

Think about it; today is the youngest you’ll ever be. Every moment is precious. Life is ephemeral and right now you are who you are because of the choices you’ve made so far. Tomorrow it may be different or you may keep moving the same way. Everything is about the progress you make all by what you say or do. Nothing is perfect. I accept that it’s okay to make mistakes. But it’s equally important to learn from mistakes and use them as opportunities for growth and self-improvement, rather than be excessively hard on yourself.

As I grew up, I also followed the same unwritten rule that is such a convention everywhere; focus on a niche and become an accomplished person. That of course makes sense. By learning the ropes and acquiring expertise wouldn’t I be able to take on additional responsibility and assume greater roles?

Theatrics apart, it did little to help me out. After working for a couple of years as a corporate executive, my dreams faded and my well laid out plans just went out of the window.  I stopped thinking or worrying much about my position and instead seriously began thinking about shifting roles or rather what felt more authentic to me.

What followed next is history. For some nebulous reason I stayed stuck. I quickly lost heart in doing whatever I was doing. I was engaged in a role that was not aligned with my values and passion. Nothing would help me feel more connected to my sense of purpose.

Until;

I learned that the only way to rid the rut was to ruminate and re-examine my beliefs and motives. Was I curious enough about my purpose? Do I have a habit of thinking only about my own pattern of thought? To be unstoppable don’t I have to be self aware and know myself? It’s like an internal vibe- a big ol’ authentic paw print that you leave on the world around you-like the lingering scent of fresh buttermilk cookies dipped in honey waiting on your kitchen table to be savored with morning tea!

To crank up my desirability I dived into three small but mighty capable things that I thought will most likely help me build a dream boat lifestyle. I wanted to be chased as a confident, kind and ambitious guy and not be out there wobbling through my life like a three legged stool.

Needless to say you shouldn’t expect to attract a 3-star Michelin human experience if you’ve been living and working in a laid-back way I had been doing.

Image source: ‘The trend of solo travel picks up during the pandemic’ in hindustantimes.com

Keep it Short and Real

Verity these days is as rare as a great white shark flailing around to show it loves to cuddle.

I gave up trying to impress people around me with everything I had; money, success, status you name it. It was not a big deal. I simply had to junk the idea to make a splash hurriedly presuming that this move will somehow improve the quality of my life. It’s pretty exhausting and tough. I was letting people see me as an ego-tripping self absorbed smug.

For some reason I found my own foolishness amusing. I was trying to reconfigure and make a fresh start and I was clueless to figure it out!

It made me laugh at myself. I laughed at my mistakes; I laughed thinking how seriously people would take my brief encounters.

Still the mirth was quite elevating. It helped me plan, procure and perform no less than I ever wanted to.

­­So don’t drift if you’re willing to take the plunge. Unwittingly if you forget to chill, remember to recall Steve Jobs’s words on ‘why being worth $10.2 billion doesn’t matter at the end of the rope‘. You’ll get your redemption.

Choose the Right Battle

Do you struggle much while trying to ‘fix your weaknesses? You’re great at marketing, but tech is your worst nightmare. Grappling with problems make you nervous. You get uneasy easily, feel helpless and usually end up procrastinating. Making time and energy sans result messes with your overall confidence levels.

So why not just outsource or delegate it if you think you cannot handle it all by yourself? Sometimes, the key to better confidence is to avoid something, rather than do something silly. Focus on your strengths and your confidence will skyrocket! Your self esteem will turn bold and you’ll feel empowered like never before.

Don’t Let Fear Scare You

Ever heard of ‘Productive Paranoia’? It’s what Jim Collins brought up in his book ‘Great by Choice. It describes a positive and proactive mindset, meaning that if you are afraid you’ll jump to act to address the cause of fear. Bill Gates said he used to worry a lot that unseen an unknown teenager working on somewhere someday might make his existing tech obsolete. He used and directed that fear into working even harder!

Manipulate your fear to take action. Go ahead, Hit the road. You will no longer feel helpless. This is when you’ll be in control and absolutely sure of yourself. You’ll know when and what to take on!

However there’s another hurdle that you simply cannot jump over. Once you’ve accomplished what you think is one thing that would make you successful…What next? Success, happiness, and fulfillment all have an unhealthy way of changing over time. After you’ve found success in one way, try to find it in another.

By overcoming adversity and scaling expansive goals, you create a penchant for personal success in your subconscious mind. You will find yourself being driven impulsively toward repeating that success in your other endeavors. Trust me, when this happens! Pride yourself; you’ve learned to succeed by succeeding. Eventually this synergy will start to toot horn for you and success will rain in from all sides.

Do you know each one of us has the potential and ability to accomplish extraordinary things in our lifetime? Except when you do not know how to get going, there’s nothing to stop you from pursuing success.

Not knowing why I did half the things I did, I had continually struggled until it became absolutely clear to me that complacency is only a restful escape from reality. I need to reach out and embrace productive practices to become unstoppable in life.

Image source:’Positive and Negative Energy : Your concepts of negative may be someone’s positive!’ by Udaylal Pai in udaypai.in

Thirty years later, today I do not fear- often disruptive- life changing choices. I no longer stand meekly in the land of busted and broken insecurity. I am not unadventurous but I choose to steer clear of known failures and move on from an unworkable solution to figure out something howsoever unfamiliar.

Isn’t ‘approbation the only eternal edge everybody aims and hopes for in a genuinely successful life? Is there a better way to rewrite your story than to junk the stereotype to become multifaceted?

Aren’t you tired of wishing you had more? Be careful; there is little difference between your dreams and desires!

Like Drake, sometimes I wish if I could go back in times, not to change anything but to feel couple of things twice! I would want more of this dangerous, jazz-shaped immortality for myself!

Life sucks and it definitely is not a cakewalk. If it were, wouldn’t we all be rich, sipping a classic mimosa on our ocean front property? But even when it’s true that I don’t or ever will own a beach house, doesn’t mean that my some 50-ish years have been hard-only. Loads of little things have inundated my life- improving everyday of it without totally breaking the barriers. From miniature vacuums to bedside night lights to heated lunchboxes, shower liners with handy pockets, and even a shampoo brush to massage my scalp, these endless options haven’t failed me few clever moments of sweet happiness. But the phantom in me, pines for more. There’s this stain remover that works so well on red wine, that I forgot; I think I can hear it calling my name.

Let’s face it; Life isn’t easy and glee and all that; but you know what is?

It’s almost a year since I started to catalogue list of things that I wished I had lots of them in life. I called it ;“Things I wish I had more of them”. I initially came up with some boring things about life, career and relationships; things that I’d learned over the years and gathered from mentors, books, friends and people close to my heart. But later some better stuff filtered in; good choices like love, happiness, contentment trumped everything else.

I created it to remind myself of useful things that mattered; probably more so because it kept my hope alive to relive them someday.

A year later I still read it a few times each day and wait for crazy things to happen!!

What do I wish I haven’t had enough? What could I offer myself back again with what I have learned over the past years? Of course, this is an idea that people play around with in their minds; and quite often realize that an upbeat past has the genius to turn things around for some good in present as well. So, why not wish for it?

Unable to warp back in time? Fear not! You’re not scammed…

If you are someone like me, let me recommend a few out of my own list that I wish for more. It’s Ok if I couldn’t wake up to a wish fulfilled each morning. I know desires have a cranky way to keep you thinking for the rest of your life about an even stranger scenario; you returning back and reliving them.

Image source: ‘Woman leaning on her table’ by Marcus Aurelius in pexels.com

Wish I could do exciting things once again

Funnily; it’s not about success or even remotely about happiness! It’s about doing things that are exciting. In my declining year, I still want to be a 25yr old jaunty good looking beau, gleefully chasing some haute’ damsel from neighborhood. I want us to climb the trees, jump the wall and beat up all the bully boys when feeling pissed off! I want to live my share of one heartbreak, one true love, one success and one moment of despair again. I don’t want the creaking knees or cringing eyes falter me or the loosening skin shame me. I want to be reminded of all the battles that I survived and the ones that I won.

I want me to be excited. I want to be nubile and mercurial. I want to be foxy, short, sweet and crisp; all at the same time!

Could there be anything more desirable than this?

Image source: ‘Old dirty sneakers on tree’ by Chris F. in pexels.com

Wish I had saved more

Like any young boisterous nerd, when young I was quite mindless about money. I did save and invested but I couldn’t manage to hoard it. Not that I was letting the thought pass by me but I had more exciting things crowding my days. I was getting carried away by the whims of the moment. A few simpler things could have made my present more bullish and upbeat. I could have done so much but didn’t pick up; I simply whizzed past in the fast lane!

See…when you are young you ride the wave of youth. You feel you’re gonna stay young forever. Behaving like a teenybopper I too was equally less impressive and less receptive or perhaps more distracted by less meaningful things! I thought the opportunity to save more will keep on endlessly coming and kept on spending the dime on utterly trivial things.

Why don’t we ever listen to a good advice when we are young? Somehow I feel though that I wouldn’t have listened even to my older 50-ish self then.

Today I wish I could travel back in time and save myself the pain, effort and trouble that I was going to earn for myself later.

If you’re in your mid-20’s and reading this, do yourself a favor;  don’t burns the candle at both ends; heed when some good advice heads your way.

Image source: ‘Signboard’ by Monstera in pexels.com.

Wish I had worried less about changing jobs that I didn’t like!

This surely applies to everyone but is more prevalent when you’re a young rookie and Waterloo moment stares you in the face every day of your nine-to-five life. You’re easily intimidated and influenced by peer pressure, authority and roles models expecting you to behave or not behave in a certain way!

Many of my decisions including the one of staying stuck with one job-it hurt most; was influenced largely by the presumption of how it’d look like to others if I did jump the fence and whether everybody would approve of it.

Today, it all reeks of nonsense…

If I couldn’t get out of my fears or shake off influences then, did I miss something important? Have I lose out on living a happy authentic life? Hell no!… but I could have saved myself from endless hours in a dead-end job that failed my purpose and skills.

For the same reason, I admit that being present in the moment with unfulfilled desires is more difficult than when you are in your 20s. You just can’t fathom the value of being present at that age.

#I wish if I were more present then, so many things would have cut fine today!

Image source: ‘Travel items’ by Nataliya Vaitkevich in pexels.com.

Wish I’d read Wayne Dyer earlier or perhaps get to watch Lady Gaga in concert

Years later, I could begin to understand the power of simple intentions only now. I wish I could size myself with Wayne Dyer…Umm! for no particular reason; but living a life of unlimited abundance and getting into your life the right people at the right time; Well…I’ll be damned if I couldn’t pick up the idea; something that I needed  so much when I was young. So much time, energy and money I wasted on things that only clutter and complicate our lives. I wish I had learned to co create my World my way when young.

Gee whiz!!…I could have done more with so much less.

Okay! Perhaps Wayne had not hit the stands then yet and I’m not sure about the latter; maybe she took to stage sometimes in late 1980s or what… I never got the opportunity to read him on the SoNet and neither could I get the chance to see her perform live.

Imagine my 20s!! I couldn’t fathom that they were going to change my life so much later on…

Amid all uncertainties, I wish I ought to have read all the enlightening things being taught in the books then or perhaps seen her perform on screen at least!

Today I watch Lady Gaga getting love from fans for sweet moments with Liza Minnelli at Oscars 2022 on flickering screens. I wish someday I’d get the opportunity to watch her perform live at Dolby’s.

But for now I guess, she‘ll have to stay in my list of should haves.’

Feature credits: ‘ Run!’ by Proper films in Youtube.com on Sep. 02, 2019.

Life is all about what’s happening in the present moment. While we wish, want and dream, our real lives are already happening. For me there has never been anything more terrifying than the prospect of dying out and missing out on all of it, because I have been way too busy wishing what more I wanted instead of appreciating what I have.

I wish…

Someday, if I could ever get to meet my younger self face-to-face, the first thing I’d want to say;Hey, stop worrying. It’s useless. Life will turn out just fine. But you can make it better by following your heart. And know what… everything you hope to feel when you get what you wish for, is with you right here, right now”

If you think that one day you might find yourself saying; “I wish, I had” then by all means do that thing right now! Hopefully you’ll never have to look back for things you wish you had accomplished more.

Trust me; it will pay off so long as you consider your wishes as no more than a little vacuum to clean up your everyday mess!!