Tag Archives: #Lifestyle

Are You Working to Live Or Living To Work?

Why making a Life is more important than making a living!

Are you someone who absolutely loves heading to the Office every day? Or even if you don’t maybe you’re connected enough that you simply cannot resist showing up. You keep giving your all unceasingly; sometimes murdering yourself, all the time hoping that this turns out to be your best bet at acing everybody’s attention and getting taller professionally.

I guess, people who fit in this category are unwittingly married to their jobs and often are set out as living to work’.

If you’re a Zoomer, you know what it’s like; the excitement of being resourceful, independent and liberal is overwhelming, way better than the dudes from Gen-X might have experienced. You’re the perfect portrayal of a deep seated personal connection to the work that you do for a fat pay-check. Perhaps you believe that success happens only to those who have an all–round desire and true commitment to work.  You’re not unaware as well that this runs the risk of compromising health and quality of life outside work place.

Yet on the flip side, many choose to separate the idea of ‘doing what I love from “I’ll do what I must to make a living”. For them it like ‘discovering a long lost passion’; so foreign and yet entirely removed from reality where work is what you do and not who you are!

Speaking of which, do you take on more work than you must? Are you putting in more hours than you ought to? When is the time to quietly start doing less to the extent that it appears not quitting after all?

How bad is too much of a good thing?

Living to work for most of us is like crossing the fine line between being occupied and being eaten-up by work. Your work life balance is at risk when you let disproportionate amount of your time and energy spent on your career.

People, who live to work count heavily on work for thrills and kicks and shut out other sources of joy and happiness. What’s worse, addicted to the adrenaline that comes from solving a crisis or tying self-worth to work, these people would often find themselves on the fast track to burnout.

See…over engagement is never free of its perils. With time, distraught work-life balance takes its toll. Your ability to handle stress is impaired and your overall well being gets affected. And more often than not, you won’t be to see it because you’re moving so fast, completely absorbed in the reality that you’ve created — knowingly or not.

So what’s the point?

Image source: ‘7 ways to reduce work-related stress’ by Neil Spooner in resetmindbodysoul.co.uk on Oct. 08, 2020.

When you fail to find the ‘just right’ level of engagement, you live your life on one extreme or the other always struggling to find the right kind of work-life balance.

But the grass is not greener for those either who consider doing little less at work, re prioritize work versus life or refuse to take a bigger chew than the one’s mandated or must.

Hell yes of course!…When you work to live, you miss out on that rich sense of fulfillment that only a meaningful pursuit brings forth.

Did I miss something?

The 10 hour work day -like so many people I braced for 30 long years, -never ever for once went out of fashion. It stood firm then and it’s as stoic today except that nowadays it’s your call how to balance everything in the new age. The strings were as tight then as they are now.

Jinxed and marred with bad breaks, I spent an entire lifetime slogging to build a career and in the process woefully destroyed part of me.  I kept judging whether it was of any worth at all, despite knowing all the while that in reality I couldn’t undoor reboot’ anything. I had no widget, no push button…none other than a blue sky above and some wishful thinking. I yearned for one. So many things I would’ve loved to rescript for a better tomorrow! Of course, there was always another tactical choice at hand; Do it the new way. This certainly was a flattering option and like everybody else my age, I was gullible. I fell for it and chose to use it.

The thought of shaping a better life and a taller me never felt fictional then.

Image source: ‘New Signs You’re Stressed at Work’ by Christine Bernier Lienke in flexjobs.com

I know I’ve never been great at work and I have struggled long enough trying to figure out why I wasn’t fine and famous at it. I would usually end up comparing myself to friends and rivals who have been fervently neck deep in work and have made some great careers and good living out of it.

It’s only after so many years of imperfections and wanting, I could discover that I was  in fact truly happy, living my life doing what I wanted to do- endeavoring, indulging and battling! Sometimes winning at others loosing, yet never letting myself forget the battles that I survived.

 I had chosen to work what I “could do” and not what I “wanted to do”.

If only I had known then what I know now, maybe I could have had both of them a lot sooner- living a great life and making a living the way I love most’.

I would let the life happen!

Life is short and full of shifts and ebbs and flows. You just can’t exist to make a living. It’s more than about living decently… ordinarily! We all deserve more and entitled to a life full of joy and happiness.

And who said it’s too late to flatter yourself?

I know how important is to earn for a good living. But you can make a living and still make a life! It’s all about perspective; about whom you love most; you as a person or as a pen pusher. With pliable mindset and a bit of allowance for wise adjustments you could let the real troubleshooter in you make life deep and smiling.

Image source: ‘Live to work or work to live? 72 per cent of Brits go to work just to get by’ by Owen Gough in smallbusiness.co.uk on Dec.08, 2017.

Of course, ‘working to liveor ‘living to work’ aren’t the only choices available. It’s absolutely possible to put the two shoes together and yet walk on sunshine. Breaking away from either of the two could though actually help you find a breezy life-work balance in a hurry.

Seriously, sometimes taking a few steps back — or a few steps forward — breaks the barrier standing between you and the life you have painted for yourself!

Don’t know how to be yourself at work? 3 easy ways to use your charm offensive to win over!

Ever since Tom Peters lured his way into the workspace of millions of career workers and professionals by reimagining the waypersonal branding’ works; business speaks, love to hate pep talks at lunch breaks and crazy hashtags swarming the inter-web; all have buckled topersonal image’ as something to be reckoned with. It’s no longer about the lettering or labeling alone; it’s our own sense of worth that has come to matter. ‘The Brand Called you in 1997’, ‘The Start-Up of You’; why else would bookshelves today brandish neatly stacked up advices on how to maximize your personal branding, become an influencer and above all stand tall in the crowd? However, they need not perplex you if you are mindful enough of gulf between an advice and a warning …

So…are you really your own self at work? Have you been good at balancing your different Worlds? Are you the one for whom there is always a sharp divide between work and home lives? …and interestingly, don’t you want to keep it that way knowing well that you’d never ever  be free of hiatuses?

It’ Ok to be yourself. Each one of us is way different in how we cope with our experiences. Some of us manage well and grow; others struggle and often sink. But either way there are moments of downside in between for all of us and it’s not impossible to become too risk-averse about the same time. It’s as difficult to hide a part of you and hesitate to rub shoulders freely. Because doing so would mean masking a part of you all the time and …that can be gross and very tiring. Cloak yourself at work, and you prevent others to reach out to you fully!

My understanding of this ball game is rather plain sailing; it’s a simple confection of three infamous anomies- frequent gut wrenching feeling of being overworked, underpaid and usually underrated! And, if you couldn’t belt-tighten forever, it sure is a tough call for you to constantly climb uphill.

This is when, I guess you fall prey to the harsh side of plutocracy and obviously won’t do well at achieving high value ‘ends’. And when that happens…

Nothing beats that creepy cold dislike for everything around you and awful urge to bite the hand that feeds you; especially when you know that you’ve been good at work and yourself all the time.  The ambush doesn’t stop here! You get tired and sick of being asked to do extra tasks outside your normal position because you’re eyed as theexpertor ‘best’ but have little or no heart for it?

Seriously….it’s time to put an end to this everyday insanity and do something to feel highly valued than taken advantage of. Nothing earth shattering of course! But if you wish to try your hand at something worthwhile to bring in a positive change in your life, check out with these three life altering choices. Heaven knows, you might ease your way into the castle without being loud or messy and without being hung out to dry!

The habit of acceptance unclogs

Image source: ’10 side gigs you can do from home’ by Alison Doyle in thebalancecareers.com on Aug.10, 2022.

If you are a stickler to rules with a bent to fight the things you can’t change, then I guess you’re to blame for all your sorrows that keep hurting you all the time. It’s simple…the more time you spend trying to change uncontrollable situations in your life, the more you get scammed by anger and stress and you’re never future ready.

It sucks! but this is how it works. Stay trussed up with a fiery mix of emotions, everything anywhere would feel schmuck. Nothing would seem to happen quick and easy.

All screwed up? Not to worry…there’s always a way to fit-in! Just remind yourself that the world never backs off whenever things go south for you. And at the end of the day, it’s your share of scares that brings you cold feet!

Yet, I think it’s Ok to be mindful …you taking all the responsibility for everything happening around you. Awesome!… you might be an instant hit in a population minority. Still, if you feel gutted and dismay tugs at your heart, then in all probability you’ve missed out one final chapter in your work book; acceptance.

Rancid and unsavory sometimes, one good thing about it is that it really changes your life.  And one bad thing is its works differently for each one of us. But one thing about it is conclusive. If you could figure out how to weigh-in your choices, it would get you one step closer to being warm and alive again!

Simply learn to unlearn the habit of non-acceptance. Stop identifying with the things you aren’t accepting. Stay close to reality. It would bail you out of most uncertainties. Your willingness to experience things as they are, instead of insisting that they be as you want them to be, is what will bring the change. And knowing thateverything is or can be temporary” would help in becoming special.

No need to die a thousand deaths

Image source: ‘Prioritise yourself, set boundaries: Effective ways to deal with burnout at work’in economictimes.indiatimes.com on Jul.18, 2022.

Sometimes when you’re wading through tough times, you get so distracted and lost that you can’t see straight. Emotions overwhelm and perspectives cloud.  You get vulnerable all the more when the fight between ‘old school style brass’ and your attempts at building ‘personal branding turns intense. It hurts…literally everybody!

This is when you need to step back and look deeper at your situation subtly from outside; somewhat more like a “a fly on the wall or a lone passerby on the street. You will get the much needed objectivity to overcome your negative thoughts. A long list of problems might have left you jittery, but few moments of emotional distancing will make you feel better and outshine the crowd in the right way at the right time.

Just be willing to let go of all that once was!

Genuine connections are comforting

Image source: ‘ What does it mean to “be yourself” at work?’ by Tim Eisenhauer in axerosolutions.com

No matter what we’re doing, we always feel better when we do it with others. Our brains are wired like that. Social bonding is irrefutably the most crucial shot in the arm for determining our happiness. It helps in taking care of ourselves and builds trust.

In work life, it happens rather differently. The din, the outcry, the backlash just about everything becomes a natural barrier to trusting each other. It simply wouldn’t let you connect with others.

When that happens it becomes difficult to forge a meaningful association with a person who is in fact someone different than the personality you’re seeing? And to rake up some trust over that? Well! that’s some raw asking!

Feature credits: ‘’How to succeed’ by Mr Monk in YouTube.com on Dec.20, 2013.

Incredibly! …legit or otherwise, bosses and managers think differently and are cold eyed about how to lead and manage without being vulnerable or revealing their more authentic self. Maybe this is what Robert Reich’s ‘harsh form of capitalism’ is all about.

All the same, if you feel trapped, vilified and find yourself struggling with too many things at the same time, you might be injuring yourself thinking ill all the time. Bail yourself out by creating your own brand; one that is truly personal. Of course you’re in charge of how much you reveal, but let people around you have enough of a glimpse to let them truly connect, understand and engage with the real you. Surely we grow by building for scale and not by aggregating it to someone else’s advantage.

Honestly, it’s your turn now to bone up your take on a struggle that in fact is not real.

Consider everything else non-negotiable when it comes to taking care of yourself.

5 simple lifestyle changes to make your life 10X happier and fun filled!

Are you someone who feels like having denied enough fun? That for some reason you never have had a happier more fulfilling successful life? Even a boat load of playfulness wouldn’t help to shake off a pretty boring life and you’re always looking for fun outside of you!

Image source: ’10 simple habits for a successful and happy life’ by Jeff Bell in moneyinc.com on Sep.27, 2018.

If that’s you, then in all probability fun is like the exact opposite of work to you; the party is no longer living within you and you couldn’t have fun anywhere.

Simply put you’re not a fun person anymore!

Fun isn’t frivolous but it can actually help you to be not only happier but more successful at work as well. In short it isn’t just a pleasant distraction from the serious business of living. In an uncertain world where stress rides piggy back all the time, holding on to a sense of playfulness can be hard.

Keeping on top of all serious responsibilities of adulthood and still hoping to make room for fun moments in life?…well, not everyone has the “fun mindset” or the ability to negotiate conflict, build empathy and  let off a crazy LOL. With no fun around to motivate, you might never outlive a poker faced person! But if you could manage it the Einstein way… I mean learn faster, work furiously and be successful like never before, may be you could manage few more moments of it.

And yet, we think having fun isn’t an option and let years of not having it reinforce this belief.

So, if you’re wondering where to begin and how to become a fun person to bring out all the mirth and gaiety that has lived inside you holed up, but hasn’t seen the light of the day for a while, here’re a few tips to beat the blues off.

I begin my day by remembering what I’m grateful for

Being thankful and appreciative is perhaps the easiest way to change tracks from despair and hopelessness to cheerfulness and some great expectations. Each morning I set aside a few wakeful moments to feel obligated for all the goodness that has happened to me. It reminds me of all that is exciting in life and encourages me to build on them.

Believe me, it’s a phenomenal way to start the day!

Instead of scrolling on Insta or surfing the net mindlessly while having my morning cup of tea, I pull out my old crinky journal and write down 10 good things that have happened to me and make me feel thankful for; being precise or detailed…it doesn’t matter.

It works as a reminder of what happy times I’ve experienced. Everything else fades into background. Best…I keep a spitting image of this note at the back of my mind throughout the day.

And trust me, it works!…it helps to relieve stress. It helps to forget the struggles that I lost. But it also helps to relive the ones that I won!

Image source: ‘How to be happy: 27 habits to add to your routine’ in healthline.com.

Being easy with fun is exciting!

How many times have you felt like you life has run out of control? Despair and gloom overshadows everything else.

Mastering it though is what would let you back in control of yourself and make the most of every opportunity!

But …how to go about it?

I think we all are open to making changes in our lives if that could make us happier and more successful. A few of us follow the humor route though. The easiest way to have more of it … I think is not to try to be funny but look for good moments to laugh.

Laughter comes at a price but has more a benefit unto itself. The more open you are to laughter the more attractive you’ll be both to other people and to yourself.

Sometimes saying “yes” works- best!

You may have heard of this … it could make a fun magnet out of you and turn you into a charming, fanciful and amusing person. All it amounts to is greeting new ideas with enthusiasm and building a few of your own.

You don’t need to be a slapstick jester to be good at this. Instead begin by choosing not to shoot down other people’s ideas but to build on them and make them feel inclusive.

Being adaptive and open would mean you’ve become less of a wet blanket.

Image source: ‘This One Thing Can Help You Live A Longer And Happier Life, Science Says’ by Alexa Mellardo in eatthis.com on Jan.20, 2022.

Nothing betters loving yourself

If you want to a happier fun filled life, don’t chase anything- not even happiness. It doesn’t come nearly as easily to those either who constantly pursue it!

There is another more simple easier way to unlock true happiness…

Making time each day to do things just for you, has an euphoric effect on the way you feel about yourself and the world happening around you. Morning or night…doing things dear to you will make you more relaxed and will leave you with something to look forward to. These things don’t have to be over the top or grand or glorious; anything as simple as taking half an hour each morning to read your favorite story book or going for a stroll or a short nimble walk…can you think of anything to better this shot at self care!

Allowing yourself to experience your best emotions-whatever they may be-is your best bet to enhance your happiness.

 Gestures speak better than badass words!

You do know how a dog when it wants to play raises its butt, prances around and wags its tail. No words uttered and yet it lets you know what it wants!

I think we should all master the human equivalent of this amazing canine act. A brief eye contact, a wry smile or perhaps an unintentional comment never intended to strike a conversation, might lit the spark. Not  much I’d say when it comes to sending out play signals but even a sarcasm sometimes works.Nice weather here! even when you’re experiencing one of the worst snowstorm in recent times, might just be the right shot to make a hit.

See… finding a way to look up from your phone and making a point, howsoever irrelevant, is surely a wonderful way to invite perky conversations –and finally more fun in your life! Even if you’re shy, introverted or a person with more on serious side, discovering the secret to having more fun is never any less exciting!

Feature credits: ‘When Nobody’s Watching’ by Klick in YouTube.com on Dec.08, 2020.

Nobody is perfect at this and life’s not always rainbows and ice creams for everybody, but whatever we choose to think and how we decide to view them…the stories we tell ourselves; just about everything becomes a part of our longing to build up a more joyous and happier life.

And it’s never been about just sitting back and letting life happen to you…

It’s you who need to happen to life!

Fortunes stumbling! What’s luck got to do with it?

Julian Danielly of Aladan Corp. never over rated the bourses swings or market pulse. The upbeat outlook later was to make him emerge as a global leader in latex gloves and durex manufacturing.

Image source: ‘Lucky Numbers and Science’ by Heiko Dudzus in assertnotmagic.com

And it didn’t happen accidentally.

One in a million lucky breaks!

Well…the only piece of luck, if you may call it, happened when he got fired by his previous employer Ansell Corp in August 1986! He had a harrowing time finding buyers for the ugly duckling of items coming out of his own stable in early years of struggle but eventually could strike a good deal with Aussies who wanted to enter the U.S. market in a hurry.

Does this mean that luck smiled or hurt him by chance alone? Has it got nothing to do with his choices or efforts? If luck is that real in deciding our everyday fate, what about the truth that everything fell his way more out of grind than luck happening as an accident?

Speaking of it, don’t we incorrectly use the word luck to avoid taking responsibilities for our choices? We consider ourselves lucky; if we are born healthy and able bodied; if we have a perfect weather on our day off; if a stranger buys us a coffee and compliments with a “have a nice day.”; if we put a dime in a slot machine and win a jackpot bonus; all such things happening truly benefit us and yet are completely out of our control.

On the contrary, what we consider bad luck is what harms us by chance. We feel unlucky, when we get a flat on our way to work; when our flight gets cancelled and we sit for six long hours at airport hoping to get a seat in the next one, worse still may be at the back of the plane next to a hollering baby. In fact, the upshot of completely out-of-control event makes us feel unlucky, dejected and perhaps angry!

What when it comes to money?

If Randy Schutt’s- a long-time progressive activist and researcher- unforgiving illustration of unequal luck is to be believed then when it comes to money, fate does matter quite a bit!.  The idea that hard work is all that’s needed for health, wealth and happiness, is all a blind caper!  “The Chancy Islands: A Land of Equally Capable People But With Unequal Luck explains just how much of dumb luck, bit of a chance and slice of encouraging circumstances can play monkey in who becomes wealthy and who stays poor’!

Beaten down by the everyday dismal science of bread and butter, most of us consider ourselves lucky if we could manage enough to get by; very lucky if we’re doing well and extremely lucky if we‘re super rich.

But to ride the circumstances and become wealthy!…well, that’s usually not true. Some people amass huge wealth even in face of random shocks of accidents, disasters and windfall fortunes. Others continue to wallow into shortages and sleep rough without having done anything to deserve deprivation.

Tax the wealthy in popular ways and hope for eliminating long term equality!  Well…economic mobility does help those born in the bottom fifth of the wellness ladder to sweat their way up; but rebalancing the chances with choices is a lost dream for most people.

It’s quirky and gets corrupted each time we try to rejig it!

Image source: pexels.com

Feeling lucky? Start counting your blessings

Ever wondered why so many gamblers risk a loss knowing well the odds of a win are against them? Is the belief that dice is ‘hot’ in a winning streak good enough for them to keep going? Why do we all expect heads on a coin toss next, after several flips have turned up tails each time? Is luck got something to do with it or is it simply a fickled mind’s illusion?

For most of us luck still matters-profoundly! As entertaining and informative as it is, our belief in it and the decrepit mindset of winning or losing an opportunity, never fails to sell us a million dollar bet on luck, each time we get the chance to ace it. Somebody’s struck with catastrophic illness, another’s winning a jackpot; without a healthy dose of good luck, nothing meets success. We all know that but prefer to believe that we are more in control of our lives than we actually are.

That doesn’t mean that we give up or stop trying in the hope that luck would influence the random events that come our way; good or bad, one way or another! There‘s a lot we can do to ensure that only the good one keeps flowing your way.

Everything is impossible until it isn’t!

For years altogether, I have taught myself to listen to the very first half awake thoughts in the morning. It’s amazing! I always end up with list of things that I am grateful today. I am alive; I am happy and there’s plenty of comforting things around me. People love me, mates respect me and friends admire me….so many good things are happening around me and there is so much to do in life.

Then there’s of course a list of bad things that could have happened but didn’t. For that I thank my…good luck for buying me yet another safe day.

Trust nobody but yourself; nothing would better your day than to start it by getting on the ‘field of life’ and every time taking a swing for the fences. I begin mine by giving it my best to stay alive and improve.

Image source: pexels.com

I believe, fortune never fails those who choose to give it their all.

Bad luck is real and so are bad choices!

I’m so often struck by the way people talk of luck in everyday gossip as something that only hurts or benefits by chance; nobody talks much of choices. The truth is that most of us keep lying to ourselves by blaming luck for our misfortunes. And we do this frequently in situations or around people who would remind us of truth about ourselves without restraint.

So, to keep the good fortunes flowing your way; try hanging out with this naked truth; Luck doesn’t get us to bourses- making money and thrive is a choice that nobody would ever let go’.

Feature credits:’‘Luck /Apple TV+’ in youtube.com on May13, 2022.

Life is full of randomness and is not obliged to give you what you expect. Pulling up each day and buckling down, to get more tailwinds than headwinds will make you covet your choices more than surreal luck.

When you want to spot a lie, listen for the word luck and when you get that, ask yourself; “Isn’t this only about avoiding taking responsibilities?”

Clichés aside, once you’ve braced yourself enough to own the truth and wouldn’t pause for luck; you surely will get your chance at change.

Besides it’s never any good to bet on some crapshooter illusion!

Don’t let yourself be robbed of happiness when you’re sad and down in the dumps!

Life is chaotic and sometimes awful things happen out of blue. And when that occurs, it feels like we’ve been thrown for a loop. Pushing to edge, it infects all our waking hours with endless worries and mellows our happiness.

Image source: ‘7 Steps to Embracing Mind-Body Wholeness in the New Year’ by Deepak Chopra in chopra.com on Dec.19,2018.

Yet, instinctively we keep driving through, often surviving on adrenaline. We over schedule ourselves; we drink umpteen cups of coffee; we respond to one more e-mail; we stay amped all day believing that we’ll eventually be able to set things straight and done. And in the way, we let ourselves burn recklessly.

It’s rude and shocking…for all that burning doesn’t do any good. Except that it overwhelms us and drowns all our happiness amidst the entire struggle. Misplaced trust, broken promises, blatant lies; just about everything stokes our sufferings.

Looking forward!

In this frantic world, happiness is like a friend you rarely have the chance to catch up with. But finding a moment of reassurance is never impossible. You may presume that you can find happiness when you’re finally completely free of troubles; but that’s not how it works.

In fact it runs the other way around and isn’t as challenging as it seems.

Terrible things do happen to each one us at some point in life. When you are caught in the thick of things-whether it’s about a snappy senior or a brassy relative who don’t believe in boundaries or yet another viral video of a violent racist incident you’re left stranded with mounting fears and have no clue how to handle it.  Worse, rather than hoping for a better end, you come up with a snappy retort and a quick fix to quell your unease.

But would an irrational assumption and aggression be of any good? Like climate change wouldn’t that mean hurtling down a worm hole of offensive ends and no-win arguments?

So, if you feel you have no space for peace left with you, are terribly hurt or perhaps angry and looking for a smarter way-a calmer way to bring to you greater attention and ingenuity without shedding one bit of happiness…these three simple ways might just let you find your Zen in a world that seems anything but peaceful.

Image source: ‘Seven ways to rest’ by Sherryl Garratt in the creativelife.net on Dec.06, 2021.

Forgiveness is good

Feeling hurt, even angry is a forgivable response when you are wronged or treated unfairly. But holding on to slights doesn’t help in reclaiming happiness. They take up so much of your emotional energy and push your emotional wellness to the wall.

Forgiveness on the other hand, isn’t something that helps the person alone you forgive. It does even more for you in the end. Of course, it’s a long demanding emotion and goes beyond a simple, “I forgive you”. Worse, sans compassion, it misses acceptance and would leave you mired in self blame and regret.

Regretting and trying to clean up the wrong on the other hand, is one good amend to begin with. Over the time, real good changes will happen to your behavior and I’m sure you won’t have to lie to your worrisome waking hours any more.

Find time for yourself

I find loneliness a mere normal state of mind that builds around relationships but desperately yens for sociability when abandoned.

While spending just the right amount of time with yourself is good for your emotional well being, excess of solitude can badly hurt your happiness over the time. Let it turn intense and it will become all consuming and wreck your everyday life. Your creative side will erode; you won’t be able to re-evaluate your boundaries and above all you wouldn’t be able to connect with your needs.

When something terrible happens and stress overwhelms, we speculate about what wrong we’ve done to cause bad luck. “I must have been wrong in standing up to myself. I created this mess for someone else and now it has double backed to me.” It’s natural for you to think and regress then.

Correct this distortion if that’s what is hurting you. Don’t wait to use your supports. They might help you see the problem differently, but deserting your nemesis and rebooting your mind to do away with ill thoughts is your personal need.

Catch them young and you could reclaim your happiness even while busy in your daily grind.

Get back to nature

Don’t we all head back to the trees (or the seas) when stress goes for a spin and begin to take its toll? Doesn’t the feel of the breeze, the smell of the grass, the sound of water running, feel at home in the outdoors?

Setting better boundaries starts here!…

Getting back to nature is one step to ease your emotional distress. It’s amazing how you could find great friends in elements around you whenever disquiet turns exhausting. As extravagant or as simple as you want it to be, there is no need for a footslog far away to some mountain top. Start with few smaller hauls and as you get closer and closer to nature, you’ll find you’re rid of your excessive worries and your innate self is back in gear. You’re no longer bedeviled! Trust me, your best bet to escape from 100 or 1000 worries lies right beyond your garden fence.

And don’t forget to leave your phone at home. A constant stream of notifications and e-mails or the urge to refresh your social media frequently can quickly chip away at your newly found zing!

Image source: pexels.com.

Most meltdowns, I think are rarely catastrophic. They are fixable and never meant to be a 24/7 experience. Yet being constantly surrounded by them feels more like being hunted in a savanna by some wild animal where your stress response is all spooked up to save your life. Your attention is mobilized and riveted, your muscles are strained for a quick sprint and your immune system is racy enough to get you quickly out of danger.

This edginess though is usually short lived. In fact you’re stressed in real sense only for five minutes….more like before you die! But even in those few anxious moments it burns into your body, slams your emotional well being and crashes your decision making. It is then that you get tightly wound up and are more likely to react harshly than to respond with reason.

No matter what you choose to purge your guilt or how you decide to go about it, repossessing happiness never happens overnight. It’s only your patience that would make all the difference between a beaten sod and a wishful Pollyanna.

Your takeaway!…

Next whenever you hit a bad trip and are clueless about how to cope with it, find a ray of hope in my playbook; without pre judging anything try your hand for once… something might just work right for you!

Can’t think straight? No worries…being grumpy is actually good and useful!

Warren Buffett certainly knows a thing a two about wealth management but his best one is straight out of pure common sense and is a polite reminder to always stay in your lane.

Success depends largely on knowing your strengths and weaknesses’.

But what happens when your anger begins to showcase your negative side? What then is there to make you truly happy?

Image source: ‘Five Reasons Being Moody Is Actually Good for You’ by Joseph Paul Forgas in vice.com on May 11, 2018.

Often we spend our entire lives looking for things that bring us happiness. While what brings joy to one person might be different from what brings happiness to another, there are few basic things that we all need to be happy. Amongst them, anger like regret and worries is an influencing emotion and the only key to our happiness in some way.

Look…we all do certain things to survive and a few more to be happy. But we do know that there is no shortcut in between. Sometimes it’s the good positive habit of accepting others unconditionally that does someone’s heart good. At others it’s the emotions involved in taking care of ourselves that lit the spark of joy somewhere in our lives. Incredibly, loving the things we do is what makes for some genuine happiness.

Imagine what would happen if in your sullenness you do things that are not natural of you, only to distract you from everyday challenges? What if you never have had any heart for any of them and yet slog on? Binge-watching, eating mindlessly, going on buying spree even though you don’t truly need things, would only worsen your mood. Pushing ahead without truly enjoying anything would make you feel roasted and bad tempered. And like it or not your dense behavior would flame out your pie-in-the-sky thoughts, if any, in a flash.

One way to get out of this rut truly, is to seize the day and live in the moment. Doing so helps to elude the most nightmarish of emotions; regret anger and worry; the three brassy devils that are at the dead center of our lives and determine our happiness. But is it enough… to stop focusing much on regrets and anger about the past or worries about the future? Is this all we need to build a truly happy peaceful life?

See…our brains are hardwired to live in the past and future at the same time. You just can’t learn your present without living in the past and you can’t plan your tomorrow without living in the future.

Frayed tempers, we all know could tear apart a relationship if go unchecked for long. Minus one little bit of humility and your affinity would go for a toss; everything gets ruined for good! Above all you’re stricken with cold feet, never ready for a difficult task ahead and would remonstrate easily.

Does this mean the end of everything shining bright? Is there a way to make sure that fears of failure never reach you? If only there could be a way to ignore the sob stories surrounding expectations!

The upsides of defensive pessimism are heartening and might just be the right game plan for you to follow. Dismayed! Don’t be… it earns you a chance at managing your future events and lets you ride out the obstacles. I won’t say it’s epic but it allows you to set for yourself reasonably low expectations of success and encourages not going overboard over any potential failure.

Believe me; it doesn’t get any better than this. You’d overcome your fears and obstacles more calmly even if you’re unsure of everything and not feeling good about it. It’s easy to deceive and sell to ourselves that we have full control over our happiness. But bluffing always ends at cross purposes.

Adversity, stress, unfairness, everything shapes how we feel. To believe that you can think yourself better simply by focusing on positive emotions, is at the very least naïve.

Here’s how to stay hopeful and give your best even when you’re uneasy, disquieted and feeling prickly;

Image source: pexels.com

Stick to the things that you’re good at, not what’s cool

Remember Alex cross in 2001 thriller ‘Along Came a Spider’!…

You do what you are. You’re born with a gift. If not that, then you get good at something along the way. And what you’re good at, you don’t take for granted”.

Many of us waste a lot of time chasing pipe dreams to learn few new things that we think are cool and reckon worthy of learning. It could be anything; from a programming language to new framework or even some difficult topic in deep learning. But before that!…everyone of us want to be good at things we’re passionate about. Not many of us, of course even know what exactly that is.

Trying to figure out it out is hard enough on its own. And it gets even trickier when you’re banging your head on a wall to make sense of what being good at something is all about.

For a start, think of Alex Cross whenever you’re in a cranky mood and feeling miserable. You might be helping yourself to figure out your strengths and what you’re naturally good at. Yet even when in one of your most peevish moods, don’t ever think of chasing waterfalls.

You’re already the greatest of what you could be.

Do what you love, not what you like

Knowing your strengths, doing exactly what you’re good at and putting all your heart into it, rewards you with all the fun and happiness you desire- otherwise what’s the point of getting rid of that ratty mood? What Tim Cook meant when he said “Do what you love, and put your whole heart into it, and then just have fun” isn’t hard to guess.

I had spent a lot of time thinking over how to evolve a pursuit that I love most when my work and career means something that I can’t help but keep going. The thoughts often left me grumpy and fuming. Deep down I knew that somehow I needed to optimize my life… but how? Wasn’t that something that I always want to do in the first place?

And then I decided to do more of the things I loved and less of the things I liked. It felt cleaner, fulfilling and helped me get in better shape.

Image source: istockphoto.com.

So, before you decide to shock yourself to shake off that low mood, take a deep breath and tell yourself that this is a question that everyone asks themselves at some point in their lives. Everyone wants to be good at things they’re passionate about. It’s just as you must cut back on things you like, to make room for what you love, you should also cut back on the your shoulds.

Still all fret and fumes trying to figure out if this is the answer to what you want to do for the rest of your life?

As I said, figuring out what it is that you’re good at, is a great place to begin with!

Wishing for a brighter side? Five promising ways to make yourself irresistibly attractive !!

Everything has attraction but not everyone sees it’.

Image source: ‘What makes someone naturally beautiful?’ in naturaluniversalsecrets.com

I wonder how good is that when people’s preference for faces changes remarkably every time they run into one?

For most part we could do little to change how we look but isn’t smelling good, being funny or not talking about your ex strongly influences your uniqueness?

I’m no Dale Carnegie or a big thumping philanthrop like Oprah. But I’ve learned a thing or two about how to draw the world around me; how to work with it than around it.

Having wrinkles or two is not a sign of horror; it’s a sign of experience, of weariness and above all your love for life. It means you’re trying to be the best person you can be; you’re trying to keep the twinkle in your eyes because you want to be happy. And you smile brightly because you know that makes you overwhelmingly attractive!!

Still, if you think that attraction is just a word and couldn’t define who you are; here’re some ways to make people love the freckles on your face.

Smile to win over!

Smile is one big way stir up things. It’s one damn good way to make others find you appealing and attractive. It hints at friendliness and receptivity. Smiling and laughing is cool; it not only makes you more attractive but it makes you feel more attractive. And doing so you, lets you experience joy and happiness even when things don’t seem to be going well.

A smile speaks of its own and works like some rustic aphrodisiac that could pull even the ever-serious counterparts towards you. Sad wry faces feel dismissive and cruel.

Imagine if you could pair a face with something positive and beautiful; that face would then begin to look more attractive. A beaming mug is way different from sad sullen ones that crowd around you every day and is the obvious choice to be judged as more attractive!

Look…

Who you find attractive is less about where you grew up or where you ran around in life. Your choice is more influenced by experiencing the pull that is so unique when you look at  a simple, coy and  pleasantly bright face.

Image source: ‘freepick.com’.

Air of excitement around you!

Let it happen! Sometimes it helps build ridiculous amount of attraction!!

People generally love being accepted and feel comfortable when that happens but not unless you make their interests important to you just as much you want them to as well. If you want others to like you, let your gestures build up some comfort.

Your friends may know who you are but others judge you only by your looks and how you connect with them. More than anything your body stance, attitude and the eagerness to open up when you bump into some stranger; that’s what make people find you attractive.

I am flattered when somebody I happen to meet first time, gets curious about my life or my hobbies. I’m sure, that someone also expects to be enquired. And that’s Ok…I think that if you could find the right stuff to make a heart flutter, the allure will rake up a warm companionship all by itself.

Truth is that every one of us on this planet believes that we know something that the other doesn’t. And we would rather die trying to learn something new. If you believe that everything happens for a reason; create your own style and share the excitement of togetherness. No matter what, how you feel is more important than how you look! Heads will turn, once you begin to get comfortable in your skin.

It’s not long before people will recognize you as an attractive and fantastic person.

 Monday blues are bad!

Negative side of everything is unpleasant. People with a peppy attitude, on the other hand bring encouraging changes in everybody’s lives, help avoid worries, see the brighter side of everything and expect the best to happen. Just living their lives and doing things they love most is what makes them attractive.

Could you think of the times when someone has been unexpectedly friendly and nice to you? Is it the person who smiled at you while you went strolling in the park? Maybe it’s only a cheerful good morning’; nothing was said at first. Maybe it’s the person who picked up a conversation with you first time and bowled you over with an unexpected compliment. Believe me, these are the kind of thoughts that never leave us. Whenever roused, they make our day feel a little better.

These small positive actions get people innately attracted to and want that someone to be around when everything goes gross.

Geez…do we need to be happy all the times? Surely that’s not possible. We all have our moments of sadness, loss, anger and hardships. And yet we know how to combat loneliness and stay snug in life.

So, just stay cool, keep telling yourself that you can do whatever it takes to be happy and let the life happen. You’ll wake up each morning knowing that you deserve the awesome life you’re living.

Trust me…

People get attracted to you, feel connected to and remember you as a fair deal only when you don’t act silly goose, are unassuming and not always cooked up to look unmistakably attractive.   

Image source: pexels.com.

Learning is wonderful

Going back to University, sweating out over some online course or catching up a seminar? If you are looking to fit into at least one of them, then learning is your one way ticket to stay relevant everywhere you go. It helps you understand how the world works. It helps you to realize your passion, boost creativity and live a better life. The benefits are simply enormous.

Sometimes we find ourselves troubled in an intense impassioned life circles where perceptions keep changing. And so do our imperfections. The painful truth is that knowing backwards sometimes feels far less important and we usually junk the very idea of learning something new!

This is where the pit gets deeper… Feeling gutted makes it worse.

For people whom we find attractive, learning is something that’s endless. They take the time to be savvy and admit when they don’t have an answer, but work around to find one. Wary and unsure, not many of us have the heart to rise and take the same first step.

For times when you couldn’t see the whole staircase and burn yourself too much over ‘I think I can or think I can’t’; it’s best to take a step back and sell yourself this story…

“Attraction is a funny thing. It never resists change. And it never lets you go dark either.”

Learning and knowing better would nudge more and more people towards you.

You’re never too good!

It’s a mean old world where life follows one single rule. If you want to succeed and be a happy attraction to others, don’t take yourself too seriously. Stop believing that everything revolves around you. In fact, there’s a good chance that when you’re gone, you’ll be completely forgotten in no time. There’s always somebody to take your place.

I find perfectionism as the enemy of change. It never lets us rest or to have fun and be happy wanting to do everything our way. We fear that one single mistake would ruin everything we’ve build for so long. It’s a delusion that wouldn’t let us be a messy imperfect and perhaps a happy person!

Image source: ‘freepik.com‘.

Sometimes I also get comfortable being uncomfortable. I love my perfectly imperfect moments. But that’s my burden and I’ve learned to take it seriously, not myself. I think being attractive is just a matter of being confident in your skin and loving the way you look like.

So, stop being a perfect student, perfect employee, perfect son, perfect sister, perfect…??.

Do your stuff with an abandon and people with a sense of light heartedness will find you attractive for sure!!

Returning back to Office? Three ways to know if you’re not stuck at the wrong work place!

It’s 8 in the morning and you’re all flustered and rushed to make it to your workplace on time. Loads of little things are hurting your head and you don’t have time to live a few clever moments of sweet happiness!

Life sucks and nothing seems like a cakewalk. Your WFH siesta has ended leaving you all keyed up with crazy jaded ideas about how you are going to begin offline. You don’t feel any heart left for your desk after a long break and don’t know how and if you can you keep pace with life now. The vacuum is all eating you up. You wish you could go back in time; not to change anything but to feel couple of things twice and possibly change hands with something more exciting.

The phantom in you whines and pines for more.

Let’s face it; Life isn’t easy and glee and all that, but you know what? If you endure your daily grind and drain yourself out without knowing why, it’s possible that your personality and your place of work might run into odds with each other. You are aware that ripping the band-aid off could get you the sun shine you were looking for so long than enduring an unfitting, ill suited work space; but a switch over is always a difficult choice.

You’re not sure if that would be the right thing to do…!

If you’re facing the headwinds- right from Covid to quality and performance concerns and feel low and trapped – the list of crises hitting businesses keeps getting longerbad breaks aren’t going to leave you any time sooner.

Here are three way to know if your hard time is simply some short living raw deal or your work place is particularly draining for your personality.

It feels like entering a pit hole!

Your Office pyramid works infamously with a twisted bottom line mentality. It’s 3Ps-Productivity, performance and profits and that’s that. No room for anything else! Your wellness and personal relations have no takers here. The demon of highbrowism is raging in every corner. It’s problematic and unhealthy–especially if you’re obsessively passionate about your work and often land yourself right in the middle of the rut!

If you are someone who is passionately preoccupied with the job and unwittingly ignores his personal wellness, then a damaging crisis awaits you with no near term exit in sight; one that can pile tremendous pressure on your happiness.

So, should this mean you’re stranded at cross roads?

Gosh-darn!…it’s intense. From sob story to small choices…you’d always figure out something and find the balance.

If you are hooked to a “spongy” mentality and dire the struggle, there is nothing much for you to do than to try and keep your obsessive passion for work at bay. Pursue the whole nine yards with a sense of balance and flexibility and you may survive the crisis.

Indeed, there is no saying where it all ends but any emotional distance between you and your work might just work.

The waters here are choppy and bruising!

The relief here always comes too little, too late! The workstead that lacks autonomy but typically has dogsbody driven high turnover, is unhealthy for most passionate people.

So, if you get butterflies in your gut, get tizzy and flustered easily and jim jams make you jumpy whenever work stress spikes; you’re in for some troubled times. Even the micromanagement would fail you completely and the unstoppable domino effect would skewer your anxiety to unhealthy levels. Again, in a job that is highly stressful and tags little or no job security; increase in bitterness, anger and sulkiness is inevitable.

When things get so screwed up and it gets harder to get out of the mess, is there anything helpful besides a non-micro managing boss to move your happiness needle, leewards?

Nothing much…if you cannot rid yourself of work slave mentality or empower yourself  enough to bring changes in your work environment; then it’s time to move on. Should you get to stay; you’d continue to burn slow and so would your happiness.

However,…

If you begin your day at your workstation with a sense of belonging, have a clear sense of purpose and at the end of the day feel like you’ve achieved what you had set out for in the morning; then probably you are working in an inclusive and respectful workplace. Experiencing appreciation, freedom, leaning while earning well and feeling supported by a helpful boss! Christ!… that’s a paradise no nine-to-fiver ever stops dreaming of! No need to move quickly to act. This place is no goof up!!

WFH exclusivity continues!

Image source: ‘Should I be working from home now?’ in bbc.com,

Virus has waned but work from home is a dreamy reality that is yet to end. For many this is a desire come true; for others though it works better in theory than practice. Bad habits, gross indiscipline and over sedentary days spew out of remote connectivity. Boozing, watching Netflix or surfing e-commerce sites during work hours have driven people low on conscientiousness. Discipline has taken some punishing and frowned upon behaviors have upped the ante.

You don’t find anything wrong in that…do you? After all it’s rest, respite and work at will…no boundaries, no godforsaken tantrums, no frayed tempers! It feels like you’ve got everything under the sun!

But if you find yourself struggling with the pivot to work-from-home especially when you are completely disconnected from work at the end of the day, then in all probability you’d feel all screwed up. What if your workstead has chosen a hybrid employment model where you spend part of your time working from home and part in Office. Better work-life balance, less commute stress, location independence improved inclusivity, minimized distraction; there are 20 different reasons that your boss could rattle off to advocate the benefits of remote working. You try fitting in like always but wouldn’t find the foothold.

Are you the one to give up on team building events and could endure endless unmotivated sessions? Unmonitored performance, increased likelihood of overworking, distractions at home, lesser perks, increased isolation; everything makes it tough to turn off. The laptop at your kitchen table beckons and you may not feel enough separation between your work and life. This all would contribute to feeling of being overwhelmed or even burnout. And, above all….

People don’t believe you’re actually working!!

Image source: ‘Working from home: The good, the bad, and the ugly’ in humanresourceonline.net on Jun.22, 2020.

Let’s be real, no matter where you’re working from, you’re still doing just that; Working. Honestly it all comes down to the environment you’re most effective in. But if your workstead promotes WFH it is not for the sake of some classic benefits of telecommuting. It’s more about a great opportunity to dig deep in to the market. Remote work is the new cool for it saves your boss from 6 different costs, gets the work done round the clock, enhances branding, parks pre-trained employees for no extra strings and a lot more. Biggest surprise!!… He could be saving up to 50% on operational costs, 15-25% on assets and up to 31% reduction in health insurance spends. Another big-wig here… smart savings is done on energy-printers, laptops, cooling systems, lighting etc. as well. So don’t fool yourself with narratives surrounding remote work.

Besides your work place at home would never sport a garden view!!

Being stranded with an ill suited job always has some serious fallout. Your personality  becomes a twisted image of you. It’s no place for you to return if it incites a bottom line mentality in you. Say no to pressure cooker environment. Even if you are somewhat less conscientious and not so passionately obsessive about work; WFH settings would still harm you.

Feeling at sea and don’t know how to let go your jammed session with this new project? and what with the Netflix hollering all the time; “You still have 3 episodes of ‘Ice piercer’ to watch”!

My word!

Return to a place that spares you a high degree of independence, choice, self direction and belonging. Stop being chased.

Feature credits:’Welcome back to the Office” by The Executive Centre in youtube.com on Oct.19, 2020.

On a brighter note!…

In bargain you’ll find yourself some small doses of happiness that you didn’t know you needed until now.

Feeling stuck and lost in life? Five reasons why it’s a great place to be in!

If you’re reading this with some indifference and don’t feel inclined to hear what’s about to come next, then odds are that your life has lost sparkle and you don’t think of yourself as good enough to thrive or at least start from timidly flat to something more exciting!!

Does this mean no “sweet spotsfor you ?

Yup! You certainly are stuck somewhere in life or at work.

That’s nothing strange; to find asking yourself if this is how you’d imagined your life; if this was the kinda job you really wanted. You are feeling low, restless with nothing to wink at; all sad and alone in your world. But then it’s Ok to be like that! This is your moment to gather your wits and push forward. Besides it’s nearly an universal experience . We all get our share of anguish of being alone and glued to the past once in a while. Career, relationship or even what’s coming next! – most people do get frozen at some point or the other!

Image source: Getty images.

So, what being stuck looks like! How’d you know life‘s been mugging you? Wouldn’t something new – a new job, relationship or tweaked health for instance, put you in the stride and shine up your life?

For me being stuck and feeling peevish means really wanting something and then losing the motivation to get it! It’s like you put your finger onto something that looks exciting and then you talk yourself out of it. It would also mean endlessly thinking about what could be better or different; if it could be done in a more gainful way .

If you’re mired in any of these; it seems indecision, worry and over thinking has robbed you of everything terrific and likable in life. In fact life has lost all sheen for you.

The truth about being stuck

Being stuck is like quicksand. The more you try to get out, the deeper you sink. Your insecurity is on overdrive and asking your mind to push, control and manipulate. You just want to feel secure, loved, appear remarkable and admired everywhere. You think that if you could control everything, all would be swell. But it’s not until the reality hits you right in the face that misadventure happens for you. You get stuck because you think you should be something you are not and when you think life ought to be different than it is.

What of me! At times when I feel truly stuck, I write.

As I write this, I find myself in a stuck period as well since the last few months. But I don’t cry foul!  I struggle less because I’ve learned to let it be. I try not to do something silly when words like “should,” ”have to,” or ”must” fluster me. When I relax and surrender to the quietness of life, things seem okay. Restless!…I see I can’t control life. I can only notice things what life brings to me.

Feature credits: ‘ 10 Things To Remember When You’re Feeling Stuck In Life’ by The Law Of Attraction in youtube,com on Jul.28, 2016.

Being stuck sometimes is all about growing naturally. It’s the time when not much happens when you think it should. These are the moments when you begin to grind yourself to come up with ideas to make things happen.

And when you couldn’t get anywhere, I call it being stuck!

Let’s find you a happy place

Remembering good ol’ days is harmless but becoming stuck there completely? That’s an entirely different story. This means you don’t feel inspired and find it difficult to get excited about things that used to earlier!

Maybe you’re ghosting a failed relationship; maybe you haven’t forgiven yourself for something awful of your past. You’re continually going over that and wondering if you could have done things differently. Maybe you’re holding onto something terrible from your childhood that doesn’t serve you.

Or maybe something else….

Regardless of how you are stuck, you at least earn yourself the agony of not enjoying your present! And that’s awful and sad!

So, why does this happens in the first place?

Missing amour proper, sinking self worth, clueless and FOMO; all are the core reasons why people feel stuck. Unhappy with present life, nerves raw and taught over some issue or perhaps fearful of future…any or all may stand in your way to be more comfortable, safe and predictable!

If you suspect that you’ve cronied your past long enough to be anything but comfortable, these five mindful tips could help you to climb out of the slump and start moving forward again!

Image source: Getty images.

Dismiss the noise

You can hardly miss this one. It’s silent; its impact powerful and it’s savage enough to keep you stuck in the same place. I often see people who have surrendered to this dear emotion willingly; the voices that they allow in and let them collide with their judgment. It could be your mom’s who loves you dearly but won’t want you to risk anything for something; it might be a dear friend who with all good intents steers you away from a great opportunity because he doesn’t want to see you fail.

Sometimes we let the voices of the people we love and care about, impact our choices. And it’s Ok!…so long as you can decide which one matters most in the situation before you let it sink in; what voices are going to help you get unstuck and which one would make you go bust. Ignoring those who love you most and could help you get you unstuck fast, though is the worst mistake you could ever make.

It’s a weird world out there and they are your best options to ride through safely.

So, simply choose carefully how much you should weigh their thoughts and opinion. Filter out what doesn’t serve right away and hang on to the voice that does!

Change your mind about anything and everything

Standing at the base of the mountain you’re about to climb and looking upwards…that looks formidable but only until you’re half way up. Looking down then doesn’t seem that disastrous. Your perspective changes and suddenly you’re excited about having won half the battle.

When feeling stuck, something close to this happens; your perspective gets stuck. You may be assessing and trying to salvage something from your past experiences, but sometimes you just couldn’t do much to give it a new look; the fear of failing the heights is frightening! You’re easily scared to hell to experiment!

But what if you chose to dig in instead of being a dead meat and try to learn of something new? The moment you begin to think differently, the stuck feeling begins to fade. It doesn’t melt altogether, but it starts to feel soft and yielding.

And now you can figure out what to do next!

Those nightmares are dreadful!

Unease and the shakes are all part of growing up normally. But being buried in them for long, isn’t. So when you’re uncertain and fear the unknown- take a moment off, breathe in long and sift through the snag. Search, what’s causing the sulk? Is it real or some phantom playing in your head? Is it actually trying to tell you something?

Fear, for most of us works like a catalyst. It startles our intuition awake when it’s time to take action; when we need to do something we haven’t done before or in a long time and we sense that something better lies out there. All we need is to go to the other side and find it.

So, what if instead of stepping back from fear, you walk towards it and push through? Take control of your worst nightmares for they are the one who have held you back. Once you do that all those moments of screwed up craziness –so dismissive or cruel– wouldn’t dare mock you. Suddenly you won’t be feeling valley low any longer!

And when that happens; you are all prepped to define yourself once again.

Isn’t that what you were looking for in the first place?

Talking to someone you love, helps

At one time or the other, we all get stuck and it doesn’t help either to know that this will not be the last time. So whenever your present freezes in your past and everything sucks…try talking to someone who loves you; not just anyone, but someone who’s close to heart. No one else would give an earful or could provide a safe space for you.

Being seen, heard and understood is something we all would die for; only an adoring admirer could remind you of your strengths and dreams.

We are tempted to change tracks in our stuck today when someone we love, looks us in the eye and shares and celebrates our dreams. It’s then the haze lifts and the picture of what lies ahead begins to take shape.

Hold tight and think easy

That will give you some more room to grow!

We all want good times, sunny successes and happy relationships to come easy even when we all know that that’s not entirely true. Dismay and chagrin usually fluster our attempts to be happy all the times. So, instead of wondering why things happen with difficulty, learning how to overcome them, matters! Nothing worthwhile comes without a struggle and you can gain so much wisdom in trying times than in ease!

See…It is the edge of our discomfort zone that lets us find our greatness.

And don’t forget… every failure is a lesson and every mistake a moment to learn!! 

Image source: Getty images.

Like I said, we look to others to help us get unstuck, but search yourself!…isn’t that a complete waste of time? The only person who can liberate you –is you. Even when the empathy and generosity of others feels like a gift, the action for the win – all starts with us. No one else but you have to do the works to light up your life.

So, sit back, take a hard look at what’s making you feel grounded and promise to push yourself no matter what!

Believe me –stuck is a good place to be in, for it gets you to know that there is something better on the other side!!

Good to Whoa! 8 pleasure foods to put brakes on your unhealthy eating- the healthy way!

Are you a fitness freak working for a rawbone or losing sleep over a lean sylphlike waist and seeing no results? What about those crash diets; still no gains?

You’ll probably hit the most success when you junk sin foods from your routine and start your day with healthy foods that do not cut out anything important. What kind of benefits you’re looking at here? Well…these slimming super foods are good at melting away that last inch of belly bloat like whoa…

Some days, you’re a kale smoothie-guzzling, bok choy-chopping freak, while on others you’re drooling over a candy bowl. But adding these incredible foods to your diet, don’t help much in getting toned and tight!

Interestingly…the way our body works is bit confusing. Hunger is what decides for it to holler for energy, but by the time it tells you that, it’s already deficient and gone wild.  That emptiness and growing pangs are in fact it’s last ditch attempt to convince you to eat.

Many of us consume the bulk of our food in two or three large meals a day and go long hours with nothing in between. This reduced–calorie- three- meal plan sounds good but you can’t make your body burn fat any more efficiently than it does of its own! Every core exercise you try isn’t always a do-gooder. Your abs may refuse to grow and your potbelly may just decide not to give up!

So, does this mean that you should stay ahead of the curve and eat even before your belly starts growling? What kinda food would work best? And what if you running short on  time? Is a four-ounce chicken breast, a small baked potato and a jumpy salad good enough to craft you a winsome body?

Hard to tell…Huh!

Sometimes my gut also screams, “feed me nice and good!”; especially on holidays and weekends. Honestly I love vegan food more than anything else but I balance my love for eating plants with need to keep my body equally supplemented, so that something wholesome and nutritious always finds its way into my belly.

If you too are looking for some healthy food without giving up on your winning routine; check out on these eight simple super eats that can thaw away that last bit of your beer belly in 2022!

Here’s the sticky widget though;

While spot-reducing belly fat is not exactly possible, eating fewer calories than you burn might earn you an overall weight loss—and that includes your belly.

But what the heck!… consider this as your go-to list for good health; at least.

Roasted   mushroom and bean soup.

Image source: ‘White bean and roasted mushroom soup recipe’ by Amy Johnson in shewearsmanyhats.com.

This white bean and roasted mushroom soup- an ageless classic- has ruled the charts on She Wears Many Hats ever since originally published in October 2011. The magical partying of pureed white beans and broth base instead of cream and roasted onions, garlic and herbs, is a guilt free gratification for those chasing a simple  wholesome stuff!

I don’t think anything else could warm you more than this savory, drool-inducing tang of this consommé.

And it’s so very worth it. Served alongside a simple salad with crusty bread, it makes for a perfect day. Looking for a vegetarian version? Simply swap veggies broth with chicken one. Bonus here!…You also get to substitute one part to three of dried herbs as you head into colder months when seasonings are hard to get by.

Black Bean Omelet

Image source: ‘Black Bean Omelets with Salsa Verde’ in goya.com.

Coffee sure does perk you up in the morning. But if you pair it with sugary cereal, bagels, or donuts, you’re very likely to stay starry eyed and listless for the rest of the day. These empty carbs taste good on the tongue, but do little for your body. Instead fill your morning meal with some healthy complex alternative that would leave you feeling energized!

Simply put, it’s all about picking a high protein fiber packed food that would promise good nutrients to your body.

I begin my day with a wholesome breakfast; be it the one that’s on-the-go list for rush days or a more relaxed oversized gut bomb for weekend brunch. Which would you prefer; a pricey spinach omelet, packing nearly 1000 cals or a simple affordable 330 cals high protein, fiber packed omelet sandwiching black beans and cheese? 

A black bean omelet is sure to make you feel satisfied and keep you full for hours. The soluble fiber helps lower your cholesterol, keep you regular and set your taste buds a –jingling! Refried black beans set off by chunks of ripe fried tomatoes, savory onions and cilantro, leave one smacking good after-taste that would have you wanting more of it.

Try it! Your palate will thank you.

Grilled Chicken Pineapple Sandwich

Image source: ‘Teriyaki Chicken Sandwich’ by Shelly in frugalfamilyhome.com.

This grilled chicken and pineapple sandwich is your best bet if you are a health freak. Not even the healthy genre of grilled sandwiches that beckon you invitingly each time you pass by the neighborhood rotisserie, are a close match to it.

Packing a mouth watering punch in every bite, this sandwich is a sweet-spicy combination of teriyaki glazed chicken, juicy grilled pineapple, fiery jalapenos and is a great reduction in your days’ saturated fat and sodium intake. An end to all flattering chicken sandwiches, this one with 400 cals and 640 mg of sodium gets you the best of both the worlds; a little sweet here a little spicy there! The sandwich with a whole wheat bun comes to you super balanced with lean proteins and high fiber carbs.

Trust me; take a shot and surely you won’t miss the fried version at all once you sink your teeth into this blast of flavors.  

Chicken Tikka Masala

Image source: ‘Authentic chicken tikka masala recipe’ in nishkitchen.com.

Traditionally cooked in clay tandoor and then served in a subtly spiced tomato cream sauce with a dash of dried herbs, coconut milk, ginger and lemon and greek yogurt; this marinated boneless chicken dish is an absolute belter and is a popular fare in curry houses from right across the East End bistros of “Curry Lane” in London to Cumins in Chicago,Indigoin Budapest to Le Palaise de Raja Maharaja” at rue d’Ouessant Paris. This all time fan-favorite is a must dig for diners all across South and South East Asia.

The creamy spicy sauce made with Greek yogurt instead of full fat cream, is insanely good and the soft marinated chicken tastes just divine! The meal gets complete with some turmeric rice and fresh naan.

It’s simply… cozy , fabulous and finger lickin’ good!

Grilled Caesar Salad

This perhaps is the most misleading food; it’s kinda dish that you order when you want to go easy with your food, only to find out that you have ended up eating almost half of your day’s calories in one serve!

Feature credits: Kitchenstories.com

A classic eat, this salad boasts of a savory combination of crisp romaine (a variety of lettuce), rich and garlicky dressing, crunchy croutons and an enticing pungent tang of Parmesan cheese. High calorie dressing however,transforms into lighter vinaigrette packing an awesome substance, flavor and nutrition of sun dried tomatoes and olives in it. Char- grilled lettuce brings some happy change and perk up everything.

 The salad preps quickly and easily with simple ingredients like boneless and skinless chicken thighs that stay juicy all through and cook quickly.

To think of this as volte-face nutrition!  410 calories, 29 gms fat and 610 mg sodium per serve! What more could you ask for?…

Try it and surely you won’t be digging into anything else anymore!

Rajma Dal

Image source: ‘Rajma masala’ by Kiran Afzal in curiouscuisiniere.com on Dec.12, 2020,

If actionable tips  and cook videos from ‘The Spruce Eats-NY are any cue then this high and hearty red kidney beans curry with a mesmerizing blend of spicy masala, ginger, garlic, chilies and tomatoes is a rustic vegetarian dish that comes cheap, is nutritious, comforting and one satisfying comfort food that could easily humble any menu item any time. A delightful vegetarian curry dish, it savors great over rice and pickled vegetables.

If you’re looking for some indulgent healthilicious  dish that could come together in less than half an hour, this one-pan cook makes for an excellent choice. Served with kachumbar salad and pickle as sides, this 232 calories unsophisticated eat has managed some space in Stock Images and Shutter stock collections too.

Palak Paneer

Another hot favorite among foodies! This mildly flavored super food is super healthy and tastes great when served with a side of basmati rice. The star of the dish is the creamy sauce, which is made out of blanched spinach blended with an amazing medley of spices. Complimenting the sauce are shallow fried cubes of paneer (Indian cottage cheese). The healthy spinach gravy is sautéed with finely balanced curry spices in aromatic ghee to up the ante!

Image source: ‘Palak Paneer’ in awesomecuisine.com.

Simple but irresistible, this dish has the punch to satisfy absolutely all taste buds! If cheese is not on hand or you’re looking for a dairy free option, tofu or veggies like cauliflower or potato will taste just as good. You may even ask for whole yogurt in place of heavy cream for the sauce to make it lighter.

This food may not be totally main stream yet, but there’s one good reason to incorporate this extremely nutrient rich leafy gem into your regular diet. Packed with high levels of carotenoids, Vitamin-C, Vitamin-K, Folic acid, Iron and Calcium, it’s a warehouse to some amazing compounds like lutein ( improves eye health), kaempferol( reduces risk of cancer and chronic diseases) nitrates( promotes heart health), quercetin (wards off infection and inflammations) and zeaxanthin( helpful in impaired vision).

So, next time you get hungry and crave for a scrumptious healthy meal, dig into a warm comforting bowl of spinach paneer curry with equally delicious garlic naan or jeera rice or plain basmati rice. Side of a red onion salad  adds zing to a super delicious hearty happy fill.

Italian Stuffed Artichokes

There is really nothing quite like an artichoke.  Whether you’re eating the hearts as part of an antipasto platter or in a spinach artichoke dip, their flavor is quite unlike any other food.

Image source: ‘italian stuffed artichokes’ in garlicandzest.com.

Tender, herby with perfect amount of zest, stuffed artichoke is  one prebiotic food that helps keep things moving through your gut. Trimmed and stuffed with garlicky breadcrumbs and baked in a buttery lemon and white wine sauce until tender, this super eat is an all time favorite and admired as an interactive food that has a distinct start, middle and an end! Like onions and leeks, artichokes also carry acetate that spurs the fat-burning activity in the body.

Need more of greens and taste? Roast artichoke hearts and asparagus with olive oil, Parmesan cheese, breadcrumbs, and a spritz of lemon. And if you’re any good at experimenting, try stuffing your ‘choke with quinoa, tomatoes and herbs and see some fascinating taste unfold on your platter.

Considering people at all phases of life are under-consuming iron and fiber and proteins and other lesser known serious nutrients, the benefits of cruising through your day with all-natural version eats, goes beyond these eight delightful melt-off foods. There are hundreds of sin food recommendations to cut back on your calorie consumption heavily. But there is no super eat that could increase your lifespan, help you feel full, clear up your complexion, control your cholesterol and reduce your risk for cancer, diabetes and heart disease?

All you could do is to mix and match foods to meet your daily quota without going easy on your weight loss plan.

And you’ll definitely have to let go of that Achilles heel; the one food that you can’t seem to help yourself digging into!

Aren’t you tired of wishing you had more? Be careful; there is little difference between your dreams and desires!

Like Drake, sometimes I wish if I could go back in times, not to change anything but to feel couple of things twice! I would want more of this dangerous, jazz-shaped immortality for myself!

Life sucks and it definitely is not a cakewalk. If it were, wouldn’t we all be rich, sipping a classic mimosa on our ocean front property? But even when it’s true that I don’t or ever will own a beach house, doesn’t mean that my some 50-ish years have been hard-only. Loads of little things have inundated my life- improving everyday of it without totally breaking the barriers. From miniature vacuums to bedside night lights to heated lunchboxes, shower liners with handy pockets, and even a shampoo brush to massage my scalp, these endless options haven’t failed me few clever moments of sweet happiness. But the phantom in me, pines for more. There’s this stain remover that works so well on red wine, that I forgot; I think I can hear it calling my name.

Let’s face it; Life isn’t easy and glee and all that; but you know what is?

It’s almost a year since I started to catalogue list of things that I wished I had lots of them in life. I called it ;“Things I wish I had more of them”. I initially came up with some boring things about life, career and relationships; things that I’d learned over the years and gathered from mentors, books, friends and people close to my heart. But later some better stuff filtered in; good choices like love, happiness, contentment trumped everything else.

I created it to remind myself of useful things that mattered; probably more so because it kept my hope alive to relive them someday.

A year later I still read it a few times each day and wait for crazy things to happen!!

What do I wish I haven’t had enough? What could I offer myself back again with what I have learned over the past years? Of course, this is an idea that people play around with in their minds; and quite often realize that an upbeat past has the genius to turn things around for some good in present as well. So, why not wish for it?

Unable to warp back in time? Fear not! You’re not scammed…

If you are someone like me, let me recommend a few out of my own list that I wish for more. It’s Ok if I couldn’t wake up to a wish fulfilled each morning. I know desires have a cranky way to keep you thinking for the rest of your life about an even stranger scenario; you returning back and reliving them.

Image source: ‘Woman leaning on her table’ by Marcus Aurelius in pexels.com

Wish I could do exciting things once again

Funnily; it’s not about success or even remotely about happiness! It’s about doing things that are exciting. In my declining year, I still want to be a 25yr old jaunty good looking beau, gleefully chasing some haute’ damsel from neighborhood. I want us to climb the trees, jump the wall and beat up all the bully boys when feeling pissed off! I want to live my share of one heartbreak, one true love, one success and one moment of despair again. I don’t want the creaking knees or cringing eyes falter me or the loosening skin shame me. I want to be reminded of all the battles that I survived and the ones that I won.

I want me to be excited. I want to be nubile and mercurial. I want to be foxy, short, sweet and crisp; all at the same time!

Could there be anything more desirable than this?

Image source: ‘Old dirty sneakers on tree’ by Chris F. in pexels.com

Wish I had saved more

Like any young boisterous nerd, when young I was quite mindless about money. I did save and invested but I couldn’t manage to hoard it. Not that I was letting the thought pass by me but I had more exciting things crowding my days. I was getting carried away by the whims of the moment. A few simpler things could have made my present more bullish and upbeat. I could have done so much but didn’t pick up; I simply whizzed past in the fast lane!

See…when you are young you ride the wave of youth. You feel you’re gonna stay young forever. Behaving like a teenybopper I too was equally less impressive and less receptive or perhaps more distracted by less meaningful things! I thought the opportunity to save more will keep on endlessly coming and kept on spending the dime on utterly trivial things.

Why don’t we ever listen to a good advice when we are young? Somehow I feel though that I wouldn’t have listened even to my older 50-ish self then.

Today I wish I could travel back in time and save myself the pain, effort and trouble that I was going to earn for myself later.

If you’re in your mid-20’s and reading this, do yourself a favor;  don’t burns the candle at both ends; heed when some good advice heads your way.

Image source: ‘Signboard’ by Monstera in pexels.com.

Wish I had worried less about changing jobs that I didn’t like!

This surely applies to everyone but is more prevalent when you’re a young rookie and Waterloo moment stares you in the face every day of your nine-to-five life. You’re easily intimidated and influenced by peer pressure, authority and roles models expecting you to behave or not behave in a certain way!

Many of my decisions including the one of staying stuck with one job-it hurt most; was influenced largely by the presumption of how it’d look like to others if I did jump the fence and whether everybody would approve of it.

Today, it all reeks of nonsense…

If I couldn’t get out of my fears or shake off influences then, did I miss something important? Have I lose out on living a happy authentic life? Hell no!… but I could have saved myself from endless hours in a dead-end job that failed my purpose and skills.

For the same reason, I admit that being present in the moment with unfulfilled desires is more difficult than when you are in your 20s. You just can’t fathom the value of being present at that age.

#I wish if I were more present then, so many things would have cut fine today!

Image source: ‘Travel items’ by Nataliya Vaitkevich in pexels.com.

Wish I’d read Wayne Dyer earlier or perhaps get to watch Lady Gaga in concert

Years later, I could begin to understand the power of simple intentions only now. I wish I could size myself with Wayne Dyer…Umm! for no particular reason; but living a life of unlimited abundance and getting into your life the right people at the right time; Well…I’ll be damned if I couldn’t pick up the idea; something that I needed  so much when I was young. So much time, energy and money I wasted on things that only clutter and complicate our lives. I wish I had learned to co create my World my way when young.

Gee whiz!!…I could have done more with so much less.

Okay! Perhaps Wayne had not hit the stands then yet and I’m not sure about the latter; maybe she took to stage sometimes in late 1980s or what… I never got the opportunity to read him on the SoNet and neither could I get the chance to see her perform live.

Imagine my 20s!! I couldn’t fathom that they were going to change my life so much later on…

Amid all uncertainties, I wish I ought to have read all the enlightening things being taught in the books then or perhaps seen her perform on screen at least!

Today I watch Lady Gaga getting love from fans for sweet moments with Liza Minnelli at Oscars 2022 on flickering screens. I wish someday I’d get the opportunity to watch her perform live at Dolby’s.

But for now I guess, she‘ll have to stay in my list of should haves.’

Feature credits: ‘ Run!’ by Proper films in Youtube.com on Sep. 02, 2019.

Life is all about what’s happening in the present moment. While we wish, want and dream, our real lives are already happening. For me there has never been anything more terrifying than the prospect of dying out and missing out on all of it, because I have been way too busy wishing what more I wanted instead of appreciating what I have.

I wish…

Someday, if I could ever get to meet my younger self face-to-face, the first thing I’d want to say;Hey, stop worrying. It’s useless. Life will turn out just fine. But you can make it better by following your heart. And know what… everything you hope to feel when you get what you wish for, is with you right here, right now”

If you think that one day you might find yourself saying; “I wish, I had” then by all means do that thing right now! Hopefully you’ll never have to look back for things you wish you had accomplished more.

Trust me; it will pay off so long as you consider your wishes as no more than a little vacuum to clean up your everyday mess!!

Three ways to know if the time is right for a good bye; burning slow doesn’t help!!

From moments of pure bliss to “badass togetherness”, relationships sometimes flinch. Between valleys and peaks, you are never certain whether or not it’s meant to be what it is. Sure you could work around to fix the rough patch somehow. But will that hold? Will everything be the same as before? At what point should you draw the line between rough times and simply giving up?

Or is it time to say enough is enough?

Like everybody else, I could realize the spoil only when it was too late. But  I spared myself the anguish, for I knew it’s never too easy to see it from the inside. Sometimes it’s blindingly true, yet we couldn’t see the red flag or smell the rot.

And surprisingly you couldn’t get to start over again…

Bad things do happen in relationships and the rot might ruin the romance, friendship or just about anything familial. Sometimes it hurts and in your  anger or inconsolable grief you feel like lashing out, cursing or yelling to let the world know how bad the hurt is. You may even get to the state where you want everybody to be hurt no less; to make everybody feel the misery no less.

The edge happens only when you find there’s no time left to reveal your love; to let others  know that over the last few months they made your days a bit brighter and helped you heal better from the hurt that others left behind; that they sank into your heart and stayed put. In the midst of impossible, somehow they became your favorite.

But like good and bad times, there are moments when things begin to get out of control. You are clueless; not sure whether to go with it or away from it. You just can’t hug harder any longer.

If any of these signs are persistently a part of your relationship, you have a serious problem to consider. It might have reached a dead-end and this could be the time to let it go peacefully.

Remember though, every tragic of something is the beginning to a fresh start.

Image source: ‘Sad in railway stock photos and images’in 123rf.com.

When enough is enough

Criticism is good; it gives you an opportunity to find your misplaced positives. But even that has a quota. Negative comments feel cruel and so does one nasty word that can silence a million applause. See…even the SoNet community works the same way; your fans may have cheered you a thousand times but you’d only remember one single message that tried to run you down.

However, if someone in your life always jumps in to say something about your wins all the time, you have a red flag there too!

I say… life sucks! but that’s how it is.

If criticism and negative comments begin to corner your attention… you need a deeper look into what’s happening around. Is getting out of a messy relationship worth the anguish of parting ways? Sometimes it gets dismissive but severing ties peacefully is more impactful than inflicting emotional damage on yourself.

See…there is a pattern of narcissism specific to each one of us. But even that doesn’t work right all the time. If somebody keeps pushing you constantly and tells you that it’s for your own good so that you may improve; don’t jump for it. If you fall for it you’ll always be looking for doses of approval from others which will never come even if you gave your 100%. Some may even pin for your attention and time!

Criticism and negative comments lower your energy and distract your attention. If you do not want to turn yourself into a junkie looking only for approval and adoration, allow yourself a course correction. Simply let go of a relationship that has  constrained you all these years.

And remind yourself…you deserve to live free! So, just let go of the decay.

Feature credits: ‘Letter to a Friend’ by Eddie Pinero in youtube.com on Jul.02, 2019.

No crooning or cocktails!

There is never any dearth of time to change your ideas about the future. It’s Ok if you are not where you thought you’d be today- you have many tomorrows ahead of you. But the journey is never straight; you’d sometimes outgrow what you once wanted in your connections. It’d feel  good if you could realize the extent of your responsibility in the context of relationship, today.

This is your journey and yours alone. So, be wary of the people close to you who would not hesitate to throw in your face the things they did for you. They may have lend you a thousand bucks and say that they saved you from penury; more to make you feel wretched than to value kinship.

I know it’s a profound statement and maybe incorrect for some of you; but that’s the truth. If the other person needs to hang the medals for having helped you, it’s time to start over afresh. You can’t turn back the clock or delete memories, but you can choose to live quietly  in present.

So, it’s time you bid adieu!

Image source: ‘Here Is How You Say Goodbye To Your Forever Person’ by Ariel Quinn in herway.net on Mar.01, 2022.

In the hustle and bustle, trust walks off

When the bad outweighs the good, it usually means hard times have arrived and are likely to stay for a while. If you can’t remember the last time you were happy…surely the problem is deeper than meets the eye!

Arguments in a relationship come with a territory. You are sad and neglected and could sense that something is seriously off, yet couldn’t pin point why. You find a pair of hoop earrings that definitely don’t belong to your mate or wake up each morning staring vacantly at the ceiling fan and think, How the hell did I get here?” He’s off to another business trip or you come home to an eerie silence everyday; your phone used to ring off the hook and now all you hear is crickets! You hang in there hoping things to turn around somehow. But with explosive fights, mascara running down the cheeks duels, you know something terrible is waiting to happen.

Essentially, you both have morphed into nasty dinosaurs for each other. You may try to convince yourself that what matters is to live in here and now; but the truth is more savage- you just cannot hide from it.

So, when at the end of the day as you lie down and pat yourself, “Wow! We made it a day without fighting,”, it’s time to get out of the fracas.

Don’t be blind to the obvious and wait to get your heart pummeled. It’s time to dump those dingy rose colored glasses and get yourself a terrific new pair.

Believe me…if you can’t stay civil on vacation in a gorgeous hotel with gorgeous spreads and cocktails and room service…it’s time to say quits.

Image source: ‘Why is it so hard to say goodbye?’ by Richard in richardcollison.net on Oct.22, 2017.

Many times you’d be tempted to make excuses and stay put in a relationship that has reached its expiration. You keep on hitting the reboot button, frantically hoping that everything will be Ok again. This continues to happen until the next time when the not so funny emotional roller coaster starts all over again. Eventually it’s a Joe No-Show and you could feel the cold feet. This means that both of you have flaked out and lost each other for good.

You may not be ready to face it…but that’s fear talking. Don’t let it rule your life. So listen to your instincts, trust your guts and stop working for a relationship that has jumped the fence. It’s time to admit that your future with the other person isn’t on the radar.

Should this happen, start taking care of you and break into a happier life. Value your needs, wants, and most importantly, yourself. Without depleting yourself, step out into a life that you truly deserve. Think of yourself twenty or thirty years from now and merit yourself by doing the right thing.

Above all stay away from people who will sooner or later leave you stranded.

Trust me, your future will thank you!!

Cry, forgive and learn to let go these five things to live a happy life!!

Are you in despair and unhappy? It’s possible that your past mistakes may have caught up with your thoughts and somehow messed with your happiness. The key to understanding why you’re upset in the first place and couldn’t be happier- lies with you!

Image source: ‘Happiness’ by Justina Daugelaite in reachingout.eu.

Don’t we all spend one helluva time thinking about what we need to be happy? Do we ever think what holds us back when we believe we have done enough for some life changing tomorrow?

Honestly…changing life for some good is not that easy. We learn every day and take each day with a grain of salt to make space for a brighter tomorrow.

This isn’t about that though, is it? Clearly not…I’d wager it doesn’t end up nicely all the time.

An irrational hunt for happiness has been waging for decades in true sense and the rage is yet to die down. Even Roger Hargreaves in his 1971 rhetoric Mr Happy’ with all his hippy dippy wellbeing ideas couldn’t get any close to being relief to more modern ideas about mid-life burnout and the gut wrenching resignation syndrome!!

When young, I had learned an easy way to guard myself; I pretended –I don’t care and because I wouldn’t, nothing would hurt me. To me, it was simple game plan and it worked so well; sadly if only for a short period of time. In exchange, I gave up all hope of building some meaningful relationships, warmth and few fine moments of euphoria.

In college I wasn’t any close to camaraderie either; almost no friends. I never went to parties or would hustle to catch up for coffees with campus buddies.

Of course that hurt. Deep within I desperately longed for the college life that you’d see splashed across billboards or experience in some smug misty-eyed soap channel. But the thought of putting out and possible snub was just overwhelming.

So, I convinced myself- I have no time for friends.

I was bitter, angry and sometimes resented everyone and everything; but at least I spared myself any rebuff.

Fortunately, as I grew up I learned to open up and face myself. Yup! it did hurt sometimes. It’s never fun to judge yourself.

But you know what? Today, it feels better than the other alternative; settling for a life half lived!

If you have read me this far, it’s possible that your moonlight happiness story has got lost somehow. You’re caught in a web of your past mistakes or maybe you’ve been giving more brains than brawl to your past and have wrecked your present as a consequence.

Whatever…

Isn’t it time to stop living adrift? How else could you ever hope to be happy again, if you can’t let go of what’s already happened?

If you ask me, life is both beautiful and ugly and we all get to choose how we want to spend it. Many of us make things way more complicated and usually crash out than live it in a simple way. Yet there are those too who endure each day with a happy sunshine view on life.

And so could you; only if you know how to look forward to improve your life!

Here are a few simple-yet powerful things; not judgment, toxicity, perfection, gossip, grudges or excuses; the usual trivia-  that you need to let go right away, if  you want to  reward yourself;

Create some free space for joy and happiness

Image source: ‘Woman with open arms’ by Emma Peneder in unsplash.com.

Happiness comes from living true to yourself.  Sure, we all make mistakes and stumble and fumble, but then life is far from perfect. It’s comforting if you play it by your own rules and not the one pieced together by others.

When we spend too much time wondering and thinking about other’s lives, we lose sight of all that that matters to us. Instead of living for our hopes and dreams, we start following someone else’s play book. This slowly becomes a plucky gamble; one that you can never hope to win.

So, look around, let others inspire you but when you feel that you are beginning to lose yourself, it’s time to let go…that clammy endless collating.

Renew and get rid of the rascal in you

Image source: ‘Floating green leaf plant’ by Ravi Roshan in unsplash.com.

Not that it deliberately blocks happiness from entering our lives when you want it …but it tends to make-believe that everything in life hovers between black and white, right and wrong, good and bad.

I’ve struggled with this wretch and it has earned me only a lot of unnecessary stress and conflict in my life.

#She comes to date tonight, or she doesn’t love me.

#I either succeed today, or I’m a complete jerk.

#You will either support me totally on this, or you don’t trust me.

Do these sound any familiar? I had burrowed myself in cheat stories like these in my ‘I’m hype’ age and it’s something that I lock horns with even today.

But I have learned to respect the duality of life. I make space for it. Today, someone cancels plans and I still love that person unconditionally. I’d fail over and over again in some weird project and yet I’d know I have made progress. I believe in her though I know sometimes I’d get to face some raised eyebrows.

Of course, certain things in life are not there to question but you need to stop jumping to conclusions.

Begin by accepting that every life holds many shades of grey.

Love it or hate it but ditch perfection

Image source : ‘Girl with paint’ by Senjuti Kundu in unsplash.com.

There is hardly anything wrong with self improvement only if you could keep in mind that chase to perfection never ends. In fact, it may even keep you away from happiness and stall you from taking risks. You may miss living life to the fullest.

Perfection to me is nothing short of a huge problem. You set for yourself high banners and grails but you merely rollick between better and the best.

And it reeks of sickness and twisted psyche…. You’ll always feel as if haven’t done enough or maybe you’re not good enough to deliver. This may even stop you from trying anything at all.

We perceive this as something negative…something that destroys our flair and clouds our judgement.

However, I see it differently . I consider this to be my USP for I’ve tried hardest to reach the best. Giving your 100% is kinda celebrating your uniqueness that made you so different.

Once you accept that moving forward is more important than being flawless, you’ll never again be afraid to make mistakes.

Everybody sometimes fail and so would you. So, simply endure. It’s more important that you embrace these mistakes and learn from them than let these mistakes keep you away from trying something at all!

It’s tough to keep everybody happy

Image source: ‘Silhouette of person jumping’ by Mohamed Nohassi in unsplash.com.

It’s natural for us to want people to like us for making them happy. But sometimes it hurts. It prevents us from being happy ourselves. This has a lot to do with our insight about what makes others happy.

You’d say that if people are pleased, they’ll be happy. But it doesn’t work that way always.

Happiness finds way in our life only if and when we want it to. True…we feel it when we succeed in making others happy. But it’s unlikely that the end result is true happiness. It’s tough to keep everybody happy for people have different needs. You might end up making somebody unhappy because of what you did to make someone else happy!

See!…It’s exhausting and stressful when we neglect our own happiness and rank pleasing others above ours.

Not that you should drop caring about others and getting along with them. Making someone smile feels fantastic and could greatly affect your own joy. But incessantly trying to please others usually backfires. So stop gagman theatrics and be your friend first.

Bliss will follow…

Feature credits: ‘Live Your Own Life’ by Eddie Pinero in youtube.com on Nov. 17, 2020.

Piano man with hard habits!

It’s human to believe that one’s always right. That’s even true when it might not be the case. Different values and beliefs is what decide between right and wrong. So when you say you’re right, it might mean that opinion differs.

Of course, it’s hard not to assume that we’re right unless proven otherwise. And to believe that you’re right 100% of the time, sometimes has negative portends. Endless arguments and pointless conflicts don’t prove a thing because there are two sides to every argument. “I don’t know”, say this and you acknowledge that you don’t know everything.

Conflicts would wane when you take this simple huge step in the right direction.

And that’s something, Yup…that will make you feel happier.

It’s never been easy and I’m still learning every day; but for now I can yell a lungful; I’m happier than ever before. I have laid off things that used to make my space crappier and buried the hatchet for good. In return I have earned me a brighter tomorrow.

And I have touched the piano man with a golden heart …

Three simple life hacks that helped me find my Atlas of happiness!

Everybody loves a happy ending, especially when it’s the story of their own life. I have begun writing that ending today. After roughly couple of months in it, lots of scratchy notes and 2000 odd words later I have finally researched my way to be happy forever!!

Image source: ‘7 Simple Ways To Be Happier’ by Seth Symond in lifehack.org.

If you are someone who believes that one doesn’t always need to stay happy and hopeful through difficult times and seriously think that recluse in vulnerable spaces is enough to ease off your discomfort, then it’s time you come out of your therapeutic feel good irrationality!

Imagine yourself 10 years ago. Were you happier or less happy than you are today? It’s not inappropriate if you think that you were happier. But 10 years hence, things are likely to be a lot less rosy. And it’s no fun to rake your brains over it now.

Happiness tends to decline as we walk through our lives and bottoms out at around 50. Then something strange happens; it races uphill again till people get split into two groups; those who get a lot happier and those who couldn’t be any less unhappy.

Right around the“I’m so hype!”age, most of us would rush to make few good financial decisions, plan ahead and are more likely to be able to support themselves in comfort and be alive always; rest who wouldn’t, just couldn’t.

Something similar happens with happiness. As we grow old, we begin to see things differently. The excitement and fun of adolescence gives way to brutally negative jibes of adulthood. By now most of us have experienced bittersweet pleasures of life; but little do we realize that these tiny time specks can make us appreciate more and encourage us to be on cloud nine, when the going gets tough.

Tough!!… is it a bad word? It certainly sounds dismissive and cruel. We all have had our fair share of moments when wits got thrown to wilds. It hurt… but prepped us for some plucky life moments ahead!

­­­If you ask me good things happen more often than the bad ones, but often we miss opportunity to stay connected to happiness. We easily forget that age is like some fabled sycophancy that allows us to fly high in the real World. At 50 you could still be the same adorable pig tailed gal or some jaunty good looking knock-out beau. Both of you could still climb the trees, jump the wall and beat up all the boys. Young and raunchy, fiercely ambitious you both have had your share of one heart break, one breakdown, one true love, one success, one moment of despair and gloom – you have had mountains of them.

Cringing eyes, creaking knees and despairingly loosening skin, need not make you falter now. There is no shame in growing old and struggling a bit; it’s a reminder of all the battles that you have survived and the ones you won!

Once you have learned how to love your lines and folds and aches and pains, begin looking for some honest happy moments, few of which you could save for grey years.

Here’s what I did to make my life stay as full and happy as possible when I reach my later years;

Does age equals happiness?

Image source: ‘This is how to find joy: 4 simple secrets to the good life’ by Eric Barker in theladders.com on Mar.17, 2018.

Like everybody else I too will grow old. But I don’t see myself climbing mountains every day to be happy or live in a landscape where that’s an option. I would rather go for a walk or sit in a stretch of green watching the birds feeding. Doing so would give me something to look forward to each day.

For me the sweetness of doing little or nothing’ is all about savoring the moment , having joy in the present and saving a bit for declining years.

When I was young, the happy–well person in me learned well to accumulate resources and habits in pursuit of happiness. Few of these, like generational wealthso difficult to control, happy childhood-that descended from long lived ancestors and sometimes spots of depression-again a formidable enemy; all have been there to teach me about late-life happiness.  

Elders would mock, “Only handfuls heed; rest count on being lucky!”

I picked that up rather seriously!

I thought that being passionate about something that I could pride later on, won’t hurt anybody. So, I chose the best way of maximizing my chances of being happy in my autumn years.

I have made some big investments in my disposition-smoking, drinking, body weight, exercise, emotional resilience, education, and relationships ranked high in my judgment. I have dug deep, chosen the hackneyed lane and I believe that I’ve done the right thing! To some varying degrees, I have kept all of them under my fold since then.

Surprisingly simple, it’s perhaps the most reliable way to see yourself smiling forever!!

Love doing what makes you happiest

Image source: ‘Being Creative Can Make Your Golden Years More Enjoyable’ by Jim Pietrangelo in healthline.com on Oct. 19, 2017.

It didn’t take me long to realize that the best way I could tweak my chances of happiness, is to pursue that one thing that could make my heart race in high octane. Not that I would let any of dopamine, adrenaline or norepinephrine run out of control.

So, I chose…

One small deed; one overwhelming gesture that when I lock my eyes onto, would make me feel all pumped up; one simple action that would make  me smile every time I looked back.

I strongly willed to improve upon my ability to weather stressful and unexpected turn of events in life. And I chose to pour my heart into it, letting it to be the last! 

Ever since, I have realized that one single most important thing for wellness in life is to raise and foster warm relationships; one that would make you quit small sins; one that you’d have to hold on to if things go south; one that would let you fit the bar pretty well even in a squeaky wrinkled frame.

I’m no die hard biophile. It’s a mean old world and we all have scars but for me happiness is no longer a matter of the heart. I know that I won’t necessarily be doomed to misery if I could work my way to few good, warm relationships.

I just want to be happy and successful. To look back on my life when I’m all old and grey, and think to myself;

“See! I totally nailed it. I have zero regrets.”

Life is surprisingly simple

We hear about success and happiness everywhere we look. We get all sorts of tips and advices about life and about things we should and shouldn’t do.

But it never really works that way every time!

Like most of us, I wasn’t sure what these words actually meant or how to get there. I might already be there and wouldn’t know it yet!

So, I looked around… What could I do to make sure I’m not getting waylaid in my pursuit of happiness? How would I know for sure that I am working towards joy and happiness that right now doesn’t feel tangible?

It’s hard to reconcile everything. Wish for an everlasting happiness and it would usually contradict ways to a successful life. The hard part is that there is no clear answer to this and all those wisdom bombs are only part truth, part value.

I needed to find the right balance for myself.

I took an inventory of all my habits and behavior and judged myself where I needed to invest a little more time, a little more energy and a little more silver to start moving in the right direction. I worked ‘smarter not harder’ so I’d still have some fun left to myself and not be exhausted or miserable when I turn 70s.

I’m no goofball; I’m hopeful and see opportunities differently. I’m sure I’ll find my  perfect grin soon.

Feature credits: ‘The Seed’ by Andy Matthews in youtube.com on Aug. 24, 2017.

As I sit quietly, I reminisce one premier episode of Grey’s Anatomy; normally a few laughs, sometimes some tears; one dialogue in particular that really hit home for me. Somewhere a patient had said something along the lines of;

“Well of course you are happy, but is there really a cap on happiness?

Lately I think I’ve been very happy; maybe I’ve maxed out. But then I remind myself; there is always room for more of happiness… there’s so many miles to go.

I also know that not everyone feels the same way. I see people battling with misery and anxiety every day and this touches me to appreciate my happiness all the more.

All this has drawn an empath in me and I know that everyone deserves to be as happy as I am.

I wish, if only you’d do just one small close to your heart thing, to bring a difference in your World and empower yourself to be happy always.

It’s unlikely that you’ll follow everything that matters and that’s Ok. Just pick and choose the one that sounds easy and worthwhile and take your first step slowly!!

Someday you’ll find yourself lucky… blessed if you may!!

13 foods to try when you are pissed off and want to set something on fire!!

Anger is a nightmare and not without consequences. Many a times we reach out for stuff that does nothing to relieve our hideous mood while we endure. But one thing is certain… anger is something that few of us can control and the rest can count on having major issues dealing with it. To calm down all you’d do is either count till 100 –this does not work for me- or sip on some green tea to save yourself from going back to those peevish emotions.

But yup! … There’s another way out too.

If you are in a snappy mood, yelling and overreacting to anything and everything, then you definitely need to work on your cranky attitude. It’s hard to rationalize but you really aren’t yourself if you are angry and without realizing it neither are your well controlled self.

Hopping mad and hormones in you upping the ante! Between snapping at everyone in sight and angry at the entire world, your stomach rumbles and you get more irritable. Maybe you are hit by Hanger- the ugly-romantic expression for mash up of anger and hunger. Shaking, feeling weak and fatigued, you continue to boil while the fight-and-flight hormone (adrenaline) continues to race through your veins, pushing your mood to limits and making you behave ugly.

This is when even small things feel like the end of the world!

If there is nothing happening outside your body for your irrational behavior, then probably you are not getting enough glucose to your brain and it’s struggling with energy intensive tasks. Your blood sugar has dropped and you are fighting yourself not to flambé your surroundings.

But you are not alone…

As much I hate to admit, I love to think of myself as calm, level headed fellow but deny me food for a few hours and the going gets tough for just about  everything! I have had my fair share of anger management but crying for food? ….everything would fly off the handle. And I ain’t sorry for what I say or do.

This I believe, is the point when extra snacking helps even if the next eat was a while away.

There is a lot in the world that could make you angry, stressed or worried all the time. So, when times get tough and moods tougher, navigate yourself to some squeaky clean food to calm yourself down. A box of donuts or a bag of chips is what you’d jump for, but be wary…they will also quickly push you back into throes of anger.

So, here are a few eats that may not exactly relieve you of incendiary emotions but would help you channel that fuming energy into something blessedly trivial. Besides no matter how cross you are, you still have to eat! Why not something that would ease off your thumping pulse?

Chickpea and pomegranate Greek salad

Fifteen minute prep time and this salad is a go-for meal after a ‘not-so-healthy’ day, when you’re looking for few good things that you couldn’t find in 4 champagne cocktails, cheesy dip or a late night pizza.

There are many smart ways to a pomegranate only if you knew how. Help yourself to a quick, simple almost vegetarian stuff. Of course you’d have preferred something more elaborate, but now with a nasty busy day staring you in the face, you’d better settle for something inane.

Feature credits: ‘Greek Marinated Chickpea Salad’ by Recipe Tin Eats in You tube .com on Jun.03, 2020.

This salad is straightforward enough but the appeal lies in texture. Chickpeas as always are dense and mushy but meaty crunchy cucumbers and pomegranate seeds, creamy salty feta cheese and bright herbs, all woven together in a simple tangy dressing of olive oil and tart red wine vinegar, come to your rescue in fighting off your misery.

Smacked cucumber salad

Image source: ‘Smacked Cucumber in Garlicky Sauce (Suan Mi Pau Huang Gua)’ in blog,seasonwithspice.com.

Wake up your therapeutic feelings by smacking a cucumber into bite-size treat. It’s a delightful salad, right down to its salty, slightly spicy sauce and a perfect food for short outbursts or when you suddenly find yourself about to explode right in the middle of something important.

Lentil and macaroni soup

Image source:’Lentil Soup with Macaroni’ in eatsmarter.com.

Isn’t it exciting and euphoric to clench something tightly in your fists and crush it into tiny bits? One perfect fix for your pent up irritability and you let off some steam in a jiffy! Crushed canned whole tomato soup with tantalizing fresh macaroni pasta with a dash of olive oil is your best spin of the day. Believe me; nothing would better a bowl of this refreshing nourishment. Leftovers would keep well for a few days. Leave out the pasta and you can freeze dry it for quite some time.

Banana-almond-flax smoothie

Image source: ‘Banana almond flaxseed smoothie’ in footprintstofitness.com on Aug.7, 2016.

Is your boss giving you some tempers off late? Somebody close getting onto your nerves? Slurp down some of the hostility on the go with a banana-almond-flax smoothie that works great both to your mental health and your taste buds. Ward off anger and depression with nuts and flax seeds that are good sources of omega-3s.

Greek yogurt with honey and granola

Image source: ‘Greek Yogurt With Honey, Fruit And Granola’ in recipebook.io.

Packing-in a few happy ingredients, this positivity parfait is one easy way to curl up your spooky madness on the go. Friendly probiotics slackening your depression and easing off those buzzing sounds in your head make full fat Greek yogurt a tasty way to fight the blues.  Add a spoonful of honeyed sweetness and you get a punch-up to fight off irritability; in part by reducing inflammation in your brain. Pitch in some berries to score one extra health point!

Quinoa, spinach, and shiitake salad

Image source:’Shiitake Quinoa Salad Recipe’ by Stephanie in iamafoodbog.com.

This super-food-packed salad’s has all the awesome goodness of vegan protein. A complex carbohydrate, it reins in depression and anger by pushing up levels of neuro transmitter serotonin in your brain. Besides the mood-boosting spinach comes loaded with B vitamins. Pair it with mushrooms- a good source of selenium and give a tough fight to anger and depression.

Poached eggs and asparagus

Image source: ‘Poached Eggs With Asparagus And Tomatoes’ in incredibleegg.org.

These stellar protein orbs are any time epic food even for jaded gourmands. A good source of vitamin D, eggs provide mood-boosting vitamin B. Paired with asparagus that contains tryptophan, the combination is an ultimate bite on a cold wintry morning. Frayed tempers, godforsaken tantrums!… increased levels of feel-good serotonin in your brain would do the trick and sizzling arguments would never get past your  plate.

Brown rice and black beans

Image source: ‘Black Beans with Brown Rice’ in tasteofhome.com.

Eating when you’re angry or riding low is usually not recommended. But certain foods have the power to ease anxiety and fight anger. Beans aren’t just good enough for your heart— they work wonders to your brain too. Selenium in them picks you back up when you’re feeling low. Plus, brown rice helps to lift your mood by regulating serotonin levels.

Walnut-miso noodles

Image source : ‘Walnut Miso Noodles Recipe’ by Heidi in 101cookbooks.com.

If you feel like a raging bull, all seething, stormy and blustering; this food is your best bet to keep your frenzy in check. Everything about this dish yells health, happiness and moreish. The whole wheat pasta is a complex carb to nurse your serotonin levels while walnuts come with the punch of Omega-3s to help grapple with your anger and grouchiness.

Whole-wheat pasta with cauliflower and collards

Image source: ‘Sicilian-Style Cauliflower with Whole Wheat Pasta’ in foodnetwork.com.

If you are reeling with anger and frustration, chances are your brain is not getting enough fuel to manage normal cognitive functions. Don’t beat yourself up over some stale cracker or lint covered protein bar. You may have come across touted versions of this dish elsewhere but the one with cauliflower and collard greens is your best cinch.

Generous portions of cauliflower not only make it taste gorgeous but also provide vitamin B-6 and folate.

Chocolate Chia seed pudding

Image source: ‘Chocolate chia pudding’ by Lisa Bryan in downshiftology.com on May 09, 2019.

If you notice people around you are slowly backing up and turning indignant to your mood, it’s likely that your hanger’s ugly head has turned menacing. Not only you are frightening to people around you but also you are vulnerable to mistakes you wouldn’t otherwise!

So, cool off a little with classic scoops of Chia and Chocolate pudding! A more sustaining alternative to standard tapioca, this one is a double whammy food to fix your mood swings.

Chia seeds have all the goodness of depression and anger fighting omega-3s, and dark cocoa powder helps keep bad moods in check.

Coffee with cinnamon

Image source: ’10 reasons you need to add cinnamon to your coffee’ by Heather Fishel in food-hacks.wonderhowto.com on 14 Mar.2016.

No Red Bull for you if you have the urge for a war cry in the thick of a long afternoon. Coffee is a natural stimulant, boosts your energy and perks up the metabolism so you can face the day without berating much. A hot one kicks you alive by raising levels of neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin. And a sprinkle of cinnamon is all it takes to pep up your slurp.

Green tea and honey

Image source: ‘Lemon Honey Green Tea’ in godrej.com.

Angry and hungry!… you’re more likely to pick up  an argument with your sweetheart for no particular reason. Since you may in all likelihood act awkward or be aggressive towards the people you’re closest to, it’s not uncommon that both of you will share the ignominy together.

Green tea is one great source of L-thiamine to relax your mind and sharpen your wits. Sip through a cup of the green stuff at breakfast, before bedtime or… during a brawl break.

Does this all mean that food is the cheeky stuff that could alter your mood and probably back-off your pyromaniac blues? Is it something that we should depend on for our mood swings and anger control? Aren’t we happy enough when we go for pizza or head straight to ice cream buckets and cakes and cheese induced snacks? 

Not to place judgment, I just wish more people would see how detrimental it is to their well being to be hamstrung by anger and not doing enough to let it go.

Not that I’d know anything about them!

 

From Anger to laziness: This is how I put my two worst enemies to good use!!

Image source:’ Woman sitting on black chair’ by Anthony Tran in Unsplash.com.

It’s a mean old world and we all have our share of scars. Yet we all talk about how great things will happen in future. But happiness isn’t something that we wait to happen later. It is something that we strive for each moment every single day; work deadlines pushed up, coffee spilled over new shoes or failing that midterm, annoyances and hard habits pulled under the rug; everything and everybody works to be just happy.  Even the most pessimistic could do with a little bit of sweetness in life.

Unfortunately not everyone has fewer problems or lesser troubles in life. Things do sometimes turn topsy-turvy. And you could be in trouble if nagging emotions like guilt and shame  overshadow your resolve even for something as simple as losing weight or cutting back on booze. You are absolutely the kinda person who succumbs to his worst habits pretty fast.

But it doesn’t have to be this way all the time.

What if we could somehow influence our worst traits enough to serve us better? Skeptical! … It’s not my kinda stuff either but if you ask me, things don’t turn south every time you push for redemption. By being intelligently and purposely lazy, less mindful, messy, slow, cluttered and bad tempered, you could actually get rid of years of craziness and be more successful and happier on your own terms.

Building a good relationship with yourself is always a worthy investment…isn’t it? After all, we all spend quite a bit of time with ourselves; so might as well learn to enjoy it!

Here are a few life hacks that made even the lazy and wrathful person in me a little bit more happier.

Love your anger

Do you get to explode at a work meeting? Or do you think, ‘What that person says, is upsetting. I’m going to address it, but not now.

Whatever, you simply can’t wish anger to go away. It’s strong – it’s high energy, it’s not comfortable and it takes some time to ease off. There are times when you are in-the-moment but don’t know how to handle it to your advantage. But what if you could plan using that anger at some other time?

Everybody gets angry when a situation changes disruptively but very few realize that we can use that intense energy only if and when we know what we’re angry about.

Image source: ‘ Smiling Asian woman in apron’ by Amina filkins in pexels.com.

I learned to draw on that anger- not to match the intensity or reactionary blow-ups – but to harness it for good. Rather than wading in or stepping up the conflict, I found it helpful in managing overwhelming situations. All I pushed for was not to let it get out of hand.

After all anger is not rage. It’s not the hardest thing to handle; but if you could, it would sharpen your focus, ping you with lots of emotional information and get you some surprising outcomes.

It’s neither good nor bad-it’s what you do with it that matters.

Stop being ‘ busy’

I guess I love being lazy now!…. but I do not let my mind be occupied with squeaky distractions. I am talking of proper idleness- choosing to do nothing!

For most part of the day we stay focused on checking things off our to-do-list which is otherwise Ok. It helps in developing a productive mindset but en route it turns our personal lives into kinda running checklist, rather than something enjoyable.

Allowing myself to be lazy was just the perfect antidote I was looking for. For once I could stop checking G-news and Face book and WhatsApp every 10 minutes or hang on to some freaky e-mail that ought to have left me worried some three weeks ago.

Stuck with laziness! …maybe a little but for once I could waylay those scary to-do-lists at home and  embrace slower healthier activities like taking a walk or reading a good book. Wonder, why I couldn’t guess earlier; I was so close to being happier, simply by being brilliantly lazy!

Of course, the tricky part isn’t finding the way but having the reason to fulfill it.

Negative emotions sometimes do fix things

I never like the idea to settle things in part because being with difficult emotions leaves me feeling wasted. Maybe my understanding of toxic positivity’ touches the darker side of psyche each time I land in a limbo. It’s like ‘I am trying to cheer up someone who actually just wants to be heard’.

The positivity falls flat.

Haven’t we all have experienced it; when as a parent or as a partner all we wanted was our problem solved instead of simply talking about it?

But I find million good things about negative emotions. Fear, rejection, jealousy, guilt, sadness; all help me to navigate well in the social world. Like everybody else, I don’t spend much time tolerating negative emotions. I turn on Netflix or would grab a good book, sip through a cuppa good coffee or rush out to the porch to do some good to myself. I prefer to stay out of touch with intolerance.

I am no longer parenting misery or sadness!

Feature credits: ‘8 Ways to Overcome Anger’ by Mind Tools Videos in YouTube.com on Aug.06, 2018.

Try to be less mindful: It works!

Mindfulness isn’t something that creates a moment of calm if you are in the middle of a crisis. Anxiety, panic attacks or physical dissociation – these disruptive emotions with generally negative results and potential side effects leave you with nothing to fall back if things go awry. I won’t say mindfulness is bad but it doesn’t make life any better. I realized that being mindful made me feel unlovable, unworthy and if I allowed-it would consume me. I wouldn’t feel cared for and insecure with no sense of belonging.

Contrarily, I got better at recognizing that worrying less- helps, for there is no cure for it. It simply arouses feeling of fear and anxiety and gloom.

Besides who wouldn’t love to feel safe, secure and free of any fear?

Things have since gotten nicer and better as I dwell on it and gently guide myself back to everything that matters.

So, you too could make this personal for whatever your needs are and see things brighten up!

I jumped making resolutions

I despise getting bogged down by those silly New Year’s vows. I am not the kind who put his feet down firmly and stays put. I get shy fast and would quit in no time.

So, this year I decided to stay clear of resolutions. I tried approaching myself with as much kindness and love as possible. And…it felt good!

Think of it like this;

“If you hate your guts enough to lose 20 pounds, do you really think you would end up 20 pound lighter?

Hmm!… maybe, maybe not. But what you will certainly have practiced is hating your guts.

Image source: ‘Happy young woman in apron’ by Tim Douglas in pexels.com.

As far as I can see, self dislike is what drives most of us to resolutions. Dreams to dazzle push you to make epic promises that usually never get past the idea.

It would sound infamy to say this, but to be at large has been a brilliant win for me. It’s also the most loving, beautiful and exciting fun to keep all those barren promises out of my hair.

I feel free and I tell myself… life’s not so bad!

I think I now love myself deeply, no matter what!!

Do dreams freak you out? Your brain might be trying to tell you something!!

And it doesn’t mean that a downright naked-in–a-crowd nightmare is waiting to happen!

Here’s what happens after you nod off.

Image source: ‘Can lucid dreaming help us understand consciousness?’ by David Robinson in theguardian.com on Nov. 14. 2021.

Did you have a dream last night that has left you bonkers? Is it the one that drops in on you day after day?

Spooky!…Maybe it’s trying to tell you something.

Or perhaps it’s our brain’s way of communicating while we sleep. It’s wired like that but…

Oddly our mind isn’t. It’s as recklessly restless as ever. In fact it stays as active as it is while we are awake. Of course it doesn’t work like a neon sign, flash momentarily and do away with the dreaming business. But while awake it gushes around analyzing things happening around us…feel, touch, emotions, events; just about anything that we bump into.

Strangely enough, all of this can turn into dreams, though it’s not always obvious what dreams try to tell us. Sometimes we get freaky ones that stick out. At others, these could be downright frightening.

What does it mean when you dream you can’t find your shoes? What if you go blind in dreams? What if you dreamed of getting divorced? Right from abysmal fall to a frightening abduction by ETs, every moment of your dream has something to speak of about yourself that you wouldn’t realize otherwise.

So…read on for some startling revelations! Here’s to few common dreams and what they might be trying to tell you!

You are running like hell

You definitely are mobbed by some insecurities. You worry too much about what people at work think of you; how’d they react to anything new happening in your life. Just about anything and everything disquiets you.

I wouldn’t wait for anything steroidal happening, if I were you. I would let go anything and everything crazy and creepy.

You can’t find your shoes

You couldn’t make up your mind over some important decision you have to make or some cracking position you have been asked to assume.

If you find you have misplaced something of value in dreams; it’s just that you don’t think much of yourself and value yourself a little less in real life. You could be steaming low on self esteem in waking life.

You are falling into an abysmal depth

It’s a huge red flag for you! It’s a sign that you have some major issues in life; work, relationship, just about anywhere. You would feel as if things are running out of control and there is very little you could do about it. You are rather hanging too tightly to something particular in waking life. So simply relax and let go of it.

You dream of your loved ones suffering

Would there be anything worse than to wake up from a dream where you watched your loved one suffer. It feels valley low. Guilt pangs have hit you hard for having done something wrong in your relationship with this person. Atone it and feel wonderful.

You dream of death

If you die or feel like dying, it might be that something in your life is coming to an end. It doesn’t necessarily mean foreboding death or you having some terminal illness you didn’t realize you had. In your waking life this signifies that a part of you is changing. How you react to the event in dreams is the only way to know if the change is a welcome one or has been forced upon you.

You are late

…And you couldn’t find ways to make a rush for some very important date! You are not a White rabbit yet you have panicked for being late! This simply means that you are overwhelmed and inundated with work stress. Being late makes you feel as if you’re making promises that you can’t keep. Don’t leapfrog but strap your boots tight!

You have become stinking rich

You have struck gold! You have won the lottery and you are feeling at the top of the world. This sudden richness in dream reveals your deepest desires- from being rich to traveling the world and mean that you have become more wiser in waking life. Not so much material as spiritual wealth, it would also mean elevation of your worth to others. No pep talk this one! It’s the beginning of a new you.

This is great! Now that you know of it; chase them.

You’re in love

This is serious! If you bump into a passionate date in dreams and feel as if you are about to fall in love, then kick yourself!! You lack this kind of intimacy and passion in your waking life. Your love life, if any is all flattening and your uniqueness is being ignored.

You have missed the ride

You find yourself stranded on a platform or tarmac for having missed your flight or the train has departed. It’s a sign that you are weighed down by too many commitments. Maybe you are pushing yourself too much in waking life and fallen from grace one time too often. It hurts. But you can get to redeem yourself once you become intensely aware of your deep seated priorities. Just leave unnecessary baggage behind and be friends to your internal vibes. Remember; you cannot beat the clock!

You have done horrible things

You dream of having committed some satanic crime and trying desperately to cover it up. This could mean that there’s a problem inside you and you need to address it fast before you get a meltdown. Besides a whole host of other wild dream-crimes might leave you feeling evil.

You’re unable to speak

If your voice fails you in your dream, this could mean you are bedeviled with some unresolved tension in your waking life. You really want to be out with what’s in your mind and to speak and be heard. Begin with addressing issues in waking life if you feel ignored and have found no way to make your opinions heard.

There’s always a better way to shoot the breeze!

Image source: ‘The serious health consequences of not dreaming’ by Derek Beres in bigthink.com on Mar.25, 2018.

You’re flying

Flying in a dream is extremely freeing. It encourages you to let go of things you couldn’t handle and let things happen the way they should. It’s a sign that you have freed yourself from something frustrating and difficult to overcome. Good times or mere coincidence?… may be; but even this feels only when you have managed some weighty decision or whacked through some serious responsibility.

That’s a dream I wouldn’t miss to get onboard with!

You are being intimate with a coworker

Strangely enough, intimate brush in dreams isn’t as straightforward as it sounds. If you dream of being physical with a coworker, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have a crush on them. You could actually be looking for an inner connect with that someone having ‘positive traits you admire’ and would ‘welcome in your own life’.

You showed up for an exam but weren’t prepared

You have showed up for an exam and suddenly your heart sinks! you realize you are totally unprepared for it! You feel weird. Bile is swelling in your throat and a sour taste fills your mouth. You fear, maybe you have prep for the wrong subject or just can’t make anything of pages before you.

This dream is a sign of something positive in you; you are a high performer, hard worker and believe in doing things right. So, no heavy hearts! Simply put, it’s your fear of being unprepared that keeps you stoked to be totally ready to perform.

You need to pee, but couldn’t find the wash room

You need it badly, you’re trying but couldn’t find a toilet! If you get bogged down with this dream, may be you’re not addressing your own needs rightly in your waking life .

You literally want to let the crap out of your life. You want to declutter and let go of something or someone you couldn’t hold onto any longer. But you just couldn’t!

Of course!… you might actually do need to go to wash room because your subconscious is tipping-off with dreams of you looking for bathroom in vain.

Search yourself and get rid of dark afternoons!!

You’re getting married to a stranger

A sense of unawareness about your partner to whom you are getting married, is a manifestation of untold fears. You are not totally sure of yourself, what is expected of you and that you might be committing to something that you are uncertain of. You doubt if you will have enough time for yourself if you commit.

You’re getting divorced

You are crass enough to have filled your schedule with too many things and are overwhelmed if you dream of this. Should you despair?

No! this one is trying to tell you that you have failed to balance your commitments and keep up the promises you made to someone close to your heart. You are succumbing to perils of your obligations and everything feels going murderously berserk.

You’re standing stark naked in public

Have you ever woken up in a dream to find yourself completely naked? If you feel at ease being buck naked, you probably couldn’t be more comfortable in your own skin. However, if you are scrambling for cover, it could just be that you feel vulnerable and not happy with who you are right now.

It’s a relief that it’s a dream only, but it might be time for you to find ways to get comfortable opening up to others. An improv class might just be the right choice to begin with.

People from waking life keep showing up

It’s perfectly normal to find friends and family in your dreams, but it’s confusing when you stumble upon an acquaintance. This may mean that someone has left impression on you and might turn important to you in the future. If you dream of someone you like (or love) with someone else, it would mean that you’ve lost the fire and aren’t so passionate about them as the other people around you are!

You’re in an empty room feeling trapped and scared

You’ve got untapped talents for sure. But if you are in an empty room with closed doors or barred windows and feeling spooky and all, it could be about something old that you haven’t look at before; anything related to your life—your job, a relationship—that you’ve shut the door on.

But…no need to be eternally skeptic. It’s only about trying to open that door, even if you’re scared. Take your gloves off and do your bit. If you can’t switch up something major, it wouldn’t hurt to go on holiday for a bit.

Image source: ‘Lucid Dreaming’  by Daviona Plowright in driveforwardfoundation.org on Jun.22, 2020,

You’ve gone blind

If you suffer blindness in dream it could just be that you’re overlooking something in life or worry that you aren’t able to see something. You are in a situation in life or your personality where you have hit a blind spot. You debility in dreams may be expressing areas in your life that you have been dismissive and cruel to.

In waking life you need to go beyond what the eyes see and find out ways to respond in a legit way.

You’re searching for someone

If you dream you’re searching for someone, it would mean that you are trying to reconnect with your own identity that you haven’t touched for so long. Dear me!…nothing to do with that particular person.

You’re lost in sea and drowning

These ones are pretty scary!! You are lost somewhere mid-ocean and you’re boat is sinking fast. This tells you that you’re feeling overwhelmed or unsupported somewhere in your life –either by your loved ones, friends, or at work.

You have found heaps of yummy food

Did you went to bed hungry? If not, this could be something deeper. Food symbolizes energy, knowledge, or nourishment. So, when you dream of it it could mean that you long for more knowledge or somebody or insights about something.

Demons have scared you to death

Whether or not you’re the one of them, if you dream of running around in their midst, it tells that you are secretly feeling as though you should change your behavior. You’re worried stiff about it lately.

It’s time you get rid of that garbage ways and earn some basic respect for yourself!

You’re paralyzed

This is the scariest thing that can happen to somebody in dreams. Dreaming of paralysis indicates that you have a lack of control in your waking life. Sleep paralysis though can occur at the moment between REM sleep and the waking stage of sleep.

Your teeth are falling out

Events in your life are in upheaval. You’ve probably lost something of value in life; maybe a job and with it, your feeling of being in control. Your teeth are the symbol of your confidence and how powerful you feel. So if you dream like this; something is definitely causing your confidence to crumble in waking life.

You’re accused of a crime

If dreams where you find yourself an accused or actually having committed a crime, torment you then probably you’re hiding something from yourself in your waking life—and it isn’t always have to be negative.

The hate dreams where we commit or stand accused some crime usually mimes a conscious choice that we make in waking life to gain wider social acceptance.

Worrying for a lifeline! Ignore some of your personal needs; purge yourself of any guilt and try fitting in. It’s perfectly alright to stay in your lane and redefine yourself.

Feature credits: ‘Interesting Facts About Dreams’ by Kendra Cherry in verywellmind.com on Feb.11, 2021.

So, does this all mean that you should worry! Are your teeth actually going to fall out?

Hell no!!…

Don’t psyche yourself out!

If you are all worked up and fear losing sleep over what your dreams might be trying to sell you, you need not dwell over it for long for one simple reason…

You are not alone!!

We all share more or less the same fantasies and nightmares and rummage for the meaning behind those strange way of messaging. It’s only the way we interpret them that matters.

What dreams speak of is not always as undisguised as you would want to; but you would sleep a little more soundly tonight if only you knew what your mind’s trying to tell.

Besides who said everybody is #perfect?

Six #egg-centric breakfast ideas to make you skip the snooze button!!

It’s seven in the morning and you have just slammed shut your bedside alarm clock##@@**

It goes off again; you press snooze but it wouldn’t mind.

With the next shrill buzz, you hop out of the bed and hustle to get ready. A quick head -out- of -the- front -door is what’s uppermost in your mind.

And then you realize that you haven’t thought of anything for breakfast.

Yup!…You do need a good one to ride you through supper.

Again thinking of skipping it? Running short of time, rushed morning or simply not hungry!! If you are missing out, then you definitely are one of those 37% of young working people, who would rather hop breakfast than be put off by Boss’s disapproving glare, for the rest of the day

Pity…if it happens daily!

Morning cuppa java is fine to ease out of your sleep, but to kick starts your body, you need enough of breakfast to break” the overnight “fast” quickly.

So, are you doing enough to outsmart the ‘four pillar’ challenge everybody is talking so much about these days? Are you good with nutrients? Do you savor your first tuck of the day and get enough of it without going overboard? Have you ever tried new food combinations to expand your palate or checked on some new healthy delicious choice?

Search for answers and I’m pretty sure, you wouldn’t fare any good on those healthcare indices when it comes to taking a delicious, sporty healthy breakfast to fuel you and get you moving in the morning-quick!… if you couldn’t manage some.

It sucks!!… you need to dig deep.

After all, it’s nutrition that you require each day, is what we are talking about.

So, how about swapping your egg benedict with something more exotic? Cereal and toast; bagel and cream-cheese; bacon, eggs and hash browns; you have had enough of these old timers. It’s time you re-imagined what your platter should look like, if a jump-to breakfast is your only option.

From warm noodle soup to fluffy steamed bao, from cottage cheese to black beans to flavorful veggies; some savory, some bold and pungent, some mellow and natura fare; look up for some delicate heart-matter inspiring new-to-you alternatives to your standard breakfast that would lit you up enough to become a breakfast believer!

If you know how to weigh-in your food choices and get yourself some good taste to experience without rushing into a diet disaster, upgrade your morning meal with some healthy, inspiring favorites.

Here’s to what to eat when your day begins all rushed-up…

Egg Hopper

Image source: ‘Sri Lankan egg hoppers with chilli and coconut sambol’ in coop.co.uk.

What is this mysterious pancake clutching my eggs and toast?” you ask yourself as you struggle with your senses over breakfast.

Flaunting a fiery mix of sambols (mix of freshly grated coconut, chili pepper and red onion ), some coconut gravy and a spoonful of creamy dhal (dried, split pulses), it wouldn’t be long before you fall in love with your first Egg Hopper Sri Lankan style for breakfast.

A simple affair of fresh chilli, onion relish and pol sambol mix, this delicious satisfying oomph dish has the punch to make you come alive in no time. Yeast raised coconut and rice flour pancakes sporting luscious yellow of egg yoke in the center and cooked in a small wok with lid, are a spicy delight and exciting to tuck. Lacy, crisp with slightly steamed texture, it takes less than five minutes to cook from start to finish. When served with exotic add-ons like fried mushroom, bacon, sausage and fresh fruits. it sets out a profound rendition of English breakfast.

Greek-Style Scrambled Egg

Image source: ’10 Traditional Greek Breakfast Recipes’ by KIm in insanelygoodrecipes.com on Jun. 09, 2021.

You’ve heard it before; your first meal of the day is the most important! But you wouldn’t care if it doesn’t come with a caveat; something with short cook time and no major meal prepping.

See…you have hands full mornings!

Easy to make and low in saturated fat, salt and sugar, this one is yet another great way to jump start your day. Heaps of protein will keep your energy up without spiking blood sugar.

Throw in some spring onions, shallots, dried thyme or herbs for a little extra punch of flavor. Swap ½ cup of tofu for the eggs and use any combination of vegetables, cheese, and spices. Stir in some feta cheese before serve; better do that in a whole grain pita pocket and with some fresh cut fruit, to perk up this energy boosting food to help you get a heap of extra fiber and load of antioxidants.

Oatmeal with spinach and poached egg

Image source: ‘Healthy Homemade Savory Oatmeal with Eggs Mushrooms and Spinach’ in gpembrace.com

When you need something in a snap for breakfast, oatmeal is one easy way to go. No refined flour or unnecessary fats, it’s an excellent source of fiber and carbs, and would give you the energy push you need first thing in the morning!

But it’s not uncommon of you to turn shy of it. It would slip into your failed menu item list in no time, if it stays bedeviled for long!

Try combining it with spinach and poached eggs with a dash of hot sauce and fresh grounded pepper. A heaping full bowl of this comfort food will just be the right choice to begin a perfect week day.

If the idea of quick sugar fixes like cereal isn’t your thing, then a good portion of this nourishing recipe is your answer for an easy, warming and incredibly hearty morning meal.

Egg Quesadilla

For all that; not sure what to have for breakfast today? Since egg breakfast ideas are the name of the game, a simple Quesadilla is my pick for a grab ‘n go breakfast for busy mornings.

Stuffed with scrambled eggs, green peppers, freshly grated cheddar or Monterrey Jack cheese and veggies, all enveloped between two crispy tortilla shells; this food is sure to leave you smiling on busy mornings.

Wise fillings only please; no watery veggies like tomatoes, cucumber! Check out for preheated meat only since the cooking time may not be enough to render it soft. The addition of toppings like guacamole, salsa, and sour cream would simply spin this food to perfection!

If I were you and looking for ways for some easy tasty breakfasts, I would whip up a few of these in no time for sure.

Weekday breakfast or weeknight dinner, quesadillas definitely do the trick!

Green Shakshuka

You have worked late and have slept fitfully. Now you’re standing in the kitchen, eyes still halfway open, sipping on coffee like a living-dead! And then the aromas of sizzling tomatoes, onions, red pepper, greens and spices waft into the air. You wake up wide and good to a hot ‘n’ spicy tomatillo-spiked brekkie, that is ideal to dig in with some crusty bread.

Image source: ‘The Mess Free, One-Pan Flavour Bomb!’ in bondiharvest.com.

A flawless, versatile and a delicious hearty cache of protein, eggs can be poached, fried, hard-boiled, whisked into a frittata, and served with anything sitting in your freezer; somehow, they always work.

Cloud-Egg Croque Madame

Have you ever given cloud eggs a try?

When the sink is already full of dirty dishes and morning rush is on you, go ahead and prep yourself an epic breakfast sandwich out of some creamy lemony eggs!

This egg-cellent croque dish is a mash-up of vintage French croque madame and a classic rally of cloud egg. At heart, with a toasted cheese and ham sandwich topped off by a simple fried egg, this dish is actually easier to make than it looks. The fluffy texture makes it even feel like you are devouring a cloud. With a runny yolk oozing and cascading down the sides of a crispy cheesy-peasey sandwich and an insanely fluffy egg white sitting atop, this lip smacking spin-off is an insane invitation to polish it off straightaway!

Feature credits: ” How to make Cloud Eggs(Eggs on a Cloud)’ by Happy Foods Tube in Youtube.com on May.18, 2017.

Look!… I love pancakes and waffles for breakfast as much as you do, but honestly; both are more of a dessert than a sumptuous healthy food.

And when you start rubbing “red velvet,” or “Brownie” waffles, it’s like;“OK”. But “I won’t”.

Indulgent, lot more traditional and…no kidding! I too live for some great sun-up breakfast ideas but not as wild as those blinking calorie pushers or sugar scammers.

Morning rushes or not, I am not the one to skip breakfast!.

How could anyone ever think of missing it out or settle for some lame one!”

Whatever…

If you are the one who hustles each AM between putting last minute touches to today’s presentation; to finding where you took off your shoes the day before; to figuring out some good explanation for being late, it’s easy that you will miss a good brekkie before you rush out of the door.

But it doesn’t have to be!

Mornings are hectic but you don’t need to flip omelets or bake fresh granola for a not-so-quick breakfast every morning.

Build up a breakfast menu from the likes of these easy yummy ideas. You’d find them good enough to fall back to each day of the week. And I wouldn’t worry much for a whole new menu each week either, if I were you!

Feeling inspired?

Next time you wake up feeling peckish, try one of these scrumptious deals to take your first bite of the day to next level.

I took time off to help myself make friends :Here’s how it went!

If Paul Simon or David Crosby had their way and ruled the world forever; all we’d need is to make a call and a BFF would show up right on our doorsteps!

Reality however, is like some dark afternoon and friendship is the stormiest of all the ties. As hard it is to find ethereal love, arguably it is even more difficult to pick up a new pal whom we can really connect to.

Image source: Sudip Paul in Pexels.com.

Free time is scarce- For everybody! And so are friends.

Making one, particularly in this day and age, isn’t easy either!

They just don’t appear. You have to intentionally reach out to someone who doesn’t bore you, is not a hypocrite and never stalls to share.

And I was running scarce on friends!!

So, I set up certain tricky standards before I could touch elbows. I looked around for adjacent friends; the types you sometimes get to see at the Gung-ho parties that usually share mutual friends, but never get to have one-to-one conversations.

Still I didn’t know how to get past that awkward small talk and double time the “Hi! would you care to be friends” business. I had always thought of making friends but dreaded going to the drawing board.

I tried to fit in with the people I already knew…well it just didn’t happen…maybe it was way deeper than I thought it ought to!

The year I turned fifty was the year I realized I didn’t have friends. I was moving into a new decade of my life and felt strongly about my career, accomplishments and relationships.

Yet when somebody would ask me whom I will send a ‘red heart’ on friendship day; my mouth will open, I would gulp and nothing would come out but a long trail of “ummms”…

Like everybody else I loved to hang around with friends. I was wary and timid but would always manage to survive the cutting edge. I would often step out of the box and was friends to many. I was spending very few hours of any day alone!

When I moved out to my job after University, I could still manage to get people to hang around with and never fell short of full social calendar. Real or not…those guys never left me off the hook. I was a footloose and always raring to fight fire with fire at the drop of a hat!

But then something changed!

A lot many of them got married and drifted off; a few shifted to bigger cities and I felt flat. For once I was robbed-off togetherness.

Crank calls grew stale and scarce. We would rarely see each other and whenever that happened, it felt empty. It were as if everybody had burnt the bridges behind their backs! No hang outs, no pep talks…no happy hours to attend; it sensed like I was laid-off from my full time job.

As if this was not enough of a complete shocker, an old timer buddy also left behind, declared abruptly that he no longer wanted to be friends anymore and wouldn’t care less if I felt the same way!

The last straw was blown to winds…. Everybody had hung me out to dry.

I felt sad and lonely. I was nearing retreat and struggling to be mates!

For the mess, I placed a lot of blame on myself. I was canceling weekend plans. I was forgetting to respond to text messages for days. It felt like I hadn’t invested time in fueling friendship. It was like I usurped everything to run it dry. I could have shown more interest in my friends and their families. Instead I chose to spend a lot of my free time sulking and arguing myself.

Why I couldn’t have someone to call a best friend ?

Why wouldn’t I have a guest list nice and long enough to reserve more than a table for two on my Anniv blast?

With so many screaming lives running at full speed and in different directions, it’s hard to slow down long enough to find and develop new friends. People are hooked more than ever onto devices; so finding someone who would care more for a real life connect is a challenge.

Did I get to make new friends?…

I realized that I needed a few things before I could rake up quick rapport with someone. Little did I know then that I was prepping myself for a new decade; both in age and life!

And this is how I saved myself hours of tepid, dead-end banter…

It was my call…so;

Feature credits:’ Value of Friends”by manu7 production in Youtube.com on Nov. 13. 2017.

I hustled to bore people!

Aren’t we all aware of the things to talk about when we meet somebody for the first time? Sports, weather, work… trivia only; and we worry that anything close to our heart might scare people away. This drift of playing safe, stonewalls everything we build to know about a person- if he or she is the right one to be a friend in the making!

Daring outcomes, I decided to let go of the slipshod gossip and went straight for what moved me.

What do you think is the best television finale of all time?” “Have you heard about the Pentagon’s recent UFO report?”

I would find these to be a great starter so long as they could stir up some interest for me. I would back away if it worked otherwise and that would save me some rancid moments!

Whatever…I thought either way I would end up happy all the same.

If I could strike a chord; I have won, If I didn’t…

Well! I never liked the idea of going public and make myself speak out to strangers in the first place.

Besides I abhorred the idea of putting down my phone whenever I went public!

I pushed myself to get curious about people

What’s a belief you have that has changed over the course of your life?” “What has been challenging for you the last year?”

Asking something like this helps to strengthen the fetters, or so I thought. Knowing each other’s opinion over things trivial without judging them might just about crush the challenge.

It felt good;I thought I have finally found a way to make the kill!

But It didn’t work out that way for me …

May be I was asking them to reveal so early about who they were or trying to be. I realized that there is no substitute for time when we think of bonding strongly to somebody.

So I pulled off those superficial stunts to avoid rejection and…

I didn’t have to wait for long to feel connected.

My take on this?...

Next time you’re partying, or hanging around with some one you might want to befriend, ask yourself what’s worth sharing and what’s worth knowing.

Get right to it only thereafter.

I decided to give it a try and said “cheese!”

Seriously! I tagged in smile on my list, for I think it is a powerful way to pickup connections. For one thing, smile takes you out of your head and defines you as profound as it goes. For another, you are no longer being dismissive or cruel.

Besides, who would want to be friends to some grumpy, irritable or crestfallen face?

So, I thought if I could connect to someone by showing off those pearly whites; why not?

I could afford to burn a little, if that helps!

I stepped out of the box

Am I limiting myself? I could easily hit it off with people some 10 years older than me. The only glitch was that I wasn’t sure if I would find somebody brave enough, to hero a dingbat like me…

And it felt like a half baked whiz kid idea fated to end miserably.

A fabled friend to many in the past, I couldn’t dare to stick my neck out and get along with 25-something people either!

I find no shame in struggling a bit; yet I couldn’t find that one soul, I was looking for.

I know this happen sometimes; but to me it happened one time too many. I did come across people who would share mutual respect for Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings and Jumanji. Next thing we know, we would be meeting for weekly brunches and all that pep talk!

But like always…it’s harder. I would end all screwed up. I can’t get past the feeling that I was the only person in the party without a partner in crime.

It just wouldn’t work for me.

Whatever the reason, I decided to stay put and not get discouraged. I knew that with enough self confidence, flexibility and patience, some day I will find friends – and get to keep them for life.

I wouldn’t queue up though!

Image source: Eren Li in pexels.com

Today, down the line with 10 years of craziness behind me, it doesn’t feel valley low. I remember to laugh, listen and be kind. I wouldn’t ever let no one who comes to me, leave without feeling better and happier.

I did though find someone freaking awesome with a beautiful mind!!

Life has since taken a coin flip for good. I hum with joy and stay stoked all day long. I wake up each morning wondering if my Octopus teachings did score a point!

What are you saying”? she would quip; “Friends are a choice to make and don’t come with a tag”; if I were to tell her what it all means to me.

“Why would you say that you get lonely when both of us know that we are not desperate to find each other every day of our lives?

“Isn’t being together and sharing, the same thing as friendship?”

And she would lit up the world for me.

Both of us would agree and smile but she would still chide softly.

And I thought saying ‘I love you to the Moon and back’ was pretty cool!!

For all that I know about it, it sounds picklish! It’s kinda box full of darkness.. You imagine being so close to your beau and you wouldn’t know if saying it would change your life for any good. You feel you mean to talk about love. But before saying things cliche’ about the moon!…think about what it really means. Isn’t it any better if said it in your own way!!

Image credit: ‘I Get That You’re Busy, But That’s Not An Excuse To Leave ANY Relationship Unnurtured’ by Dallas Jordan in theodesseyonline.com on Nov. 26, 2018.

# “The sun rises, and a bear and cub begin their day together. They splash in the water, climb mountains, and watch the shimmering sky. They show their love by touching noses, playing chase, and of course, hugging

I Love You to the Moon and Back’ is a sweet heart-tugging emotional gentle tale of a bear and her cub; an adorable read by Amelia Hepworth; a sweet gentle rhyme…

And it never fails to touch the strings…

Today, I am miles away from the person I was at fourteen; far away from those bittersweet mushy feelings that were a torment sometimes. I couldn’t win myself over to tell others what love is all about.

It always ended drearily;

Like everybody else, I too wanted to party on special days especially if it was a birthday or prom party!

Is it really not any easy thing to measure? I would wonder.

It’s always been a meh for me.Will you be my friend? And it will end abruptly.

Guess I couldn’t ever fake things over!

Feature credits: ‘Love You To The Moon and Back’ by Betsy Benn in Youtube.com on Feb.03, 2019.

Love- I hear everybody say, is a beautiful feeling and finds many ways to manifest itself. So, saying to someoneI Love You to the Moon and Back’; Is it a perfect way to treat somebody perfect? I have heard this countless times from those in serious relationships. It sounds just like a mother who loves her baby and tries to make her sleep.

It even sounds hoarse some times.

Perhaps they find it the best way to moonshine their love for someone more than anything or anyone else.

Maybe I toy with half baked ideas for long. May be I wasn’t a whiz kid after all.

I just didn’t know why! But I did figure out how.

It is the easiest thing to say I love you. Yet you are in for a rough time if you couldn’t voice your passion. Because love sets out for utter loyalty and you can’t fathom it; the best you can do is feel it and make your partner feel that he or she is the whole world for you.

I read it somewhere that our heart draws energy enough to drive a truck some 20 miles each day! Whoa!…reckon it’s equivalent to driving to moon and back in an average lifetime! So when you are as happy as a clam in your relationship and fired up enough to belter outI Love You to the Moon and Back’, you are essentially saying that you love them with all the blood your heart will pump in your entire life time.

That’s sweet… and great… and equally meaningful!

I however, find it gross and extremely cliché. Just too many people on too many occasions air their emotions the same way. It’s kinda wising off love to stay connected.

And why the moon? Why not the sun? Why not some other planets like Mars or Pluto? Have we unseated them because of the distance or that they are now considered dwarf planets?

The moon is about 238855 miles away. So when we blurt out our love this way, do we mean to say that we guarantee love only for 477710 miles only?

That’ some mathematics… Your guarantee to stay in love expires by the time you turn 60 assuming you are twenty now. Even a car could get you to travel approx 12000 kms every year.

So, that doesn’t tag you to a very strong way to promise love to eternity…

My take on this? Well…. It’s tad different than what you might think!

I believe that if I was twenty years old and have posted on InstagramI love you to the moon and back, to someone I assume I would be expected not to love that person when I got 60.

That’s real Cool! A simple’ I love youdoesn’t work these days. People need that extra frill to express themselves. An extra pizza that everyone else has- would do just fine.

But if this is what everybody is hollering for, should it mean the same to everybody?

#‘What is Real?’ asked the rabbit.” “Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. ‘It’s a thing that happens to you.” Margery Williams in The Velveteen Rabbit.

Image credit: ‘Powerful Full Moon Love Spells’ by Emma Waston in love-spells-that-really-work.com on JUn.17, 2016.

I have been in blissful wedlock for over thirty years with a coy, broad vision gal who never heard of this quote anytime earlier in her life and finds it rather amusing.

What are you saying”? she would quip; You can say it better in your own words”, if I were to tell her what it all means to everybody else.

“Why would you say that when both of us know that we are not desperate to find each other every time each day of our lives? “Isn’t being together and sharing and caring is same thing as love?”

Both of us know that but still she would admonish.

I assume you are wondering if I have gotten into something too philosophical. What’ s all this musing is about, if revelation is not worth it?

That’ some food for everyone of us to think about.

Besides she might take more than a minute to figure out what this phrase is really all about?

But that is the point…!

Over the moon?… not yet, but I’m Ok with that. Together we have won over many of those cytokine kinda storm of chemicals that leaves us blinded with screaming rage for a while. There are moments of frayed tempers, bad arguments, and godforsaken sizzlers tearing us apart! We might as well be driving each other crazy.

But we manage to get that mess out of our hairs – each time. There is no shame in struggling a bit.

Oh shoot…! Ask no questions and hear no lies!! No..click bait story that I know you wouldn’t buy.

It’s just that finding happiness in your life begins with not wanting to be happy all the time. It’s fine to have bad days. Even when everything in our lives is going well, still there are days when one of us is in bad mood. Life sucks.. everything feels and works awful sometimes.

When it gets this bad, we slow down for three minutes… no more and let our thoughts simmer down. We use those moments to let what is happening around us, sink in.

After those three minutes are up, that seething anger runs out of steam and simmers down to a slower pace.

Crisis staved off, I smile and in turn… she smiles!!

We truly take it in with all our senses. After all a joyful life is the best existence we can hope to achieve. To have someone to love and to be able to accept that love in return feels wonderful!

So, hiccups and hookups aside, who would want to ride to the moon to be happy?

It’s epic anyways!!

Image credit: ‘9 Cute and Crazy Promposal Stories that Will Make You Miss Your High School Prom’ by Kiana Palacios in wheninmanila.com on Feb. 20, 2019.

Next time, if you plan to take your partner for a ride to moon and back fearing that you might just fall shy of the trust and promises you have made and the whole episode will get trumped, if you didn’t…

Think twice about what it really means. You could do just about everything under the sun and be over the moon without riding up to it. You will come up with a brilliant win…always, all the times!!

So, stay stoked and be a gift to your partner and yourself !

You’ll feel better and so shall your partner.

Wake up your senses with a humble Cup o’ Joe! : Hustle your Coffee upgrade my way!!

Just like wine and whisky the world of coffee is intense and complex. With endless versions and infinite ways, learning every trick, every brew method and every mix sounds like a serious cliche’ but you’re never late to stoke your passion for those easy peasy beans.

Tune in to coffee making -the complex Indian way for a start. A stellar coffee experience, it will turn you a connoisseur — in less time than you may think.

Image source: ‘How to tap into the health benefits of coffee’ by Amanda Loudin in nbcnews.com on Dec. 05, 2019.

If you’re creative, shy and introvert kinda morning person, then odds are you prefer  coffee over tea.Rather I would say, you are a typical coffee loving person who looks for it’s zing first thing in the morning!

And, what if it gets you to make more money and more pay raises? People in Britain and elsewhere now rally behind the notion that your fondness and choice for morning cup could actually uptick your personality. It pushes you more as a productive, significant and an affordable hand at work!

…in turn your pockets get deeper alright!

More than the ‘tea people’ who are usually pensive and look for tea’s relaxing qualities…. coffee fans are easily likely to say they’re “always” on time.

Latte, Mocha, Italian or American…Like most ‘Coffee persons’ do you also fancy morning cuppa to be black, plain and simple?

Myself a coffee aficionado? No!

I am not a coffee buff nor I eagerly look forward to it. I would rather have tea over coffee. No particular reason… don’t get me wrong! I do like coffee and espresso, including lattes and cappuccinos, but my morning go-to favorite is a steamy cup of sweet fragrant tea.

I have been a caffeine skeptic for quite some time but it doesn’t mean that I have no nose for it. It’s just that becoming a coffee weirdo takes time. It’s equal to becoming a wine or a whiskey sommelier. I think that it takes passion, love for the beverage and the desire to know everything there is to know about it.

And with so much happening in the atlas of coffee making, it’s no easy feat!

I know I have the rush to appreciate the magic of beans and might some day start working my way forward. Still, I respect those who take me for acoffee snob’. And I understand that there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a coffee geek at heart!

The point as I see it, is that till you get to explore the world of coffee making and learn the ways to brew it the correct way, people will frown and the cup you think you love might not be even cutting it close.

Image source: ‘Natural Mountains Coffee Archives’ in iddukivalley.com.

Hand beaten or frothy- I wasn’t too fond of it until…!

Like everybody else you know much about coffee. You are aware of the different roasts. You know of the different types of beans, where they come from. You know various flavor profiles and you know of all the fêted ‘decoctions’. In fact you are on top of every new coffee trend that comes your way!

But if you know the beans, flavors, and brew styles so well, are you aware that there are more than one ways to beef up your brew’s flavors and aroma?

No!.. I am not talking about some plain simple morning pick-me-up kinda drink any more, but a hand crafted brew of tropical roasted grounded beans that has enough richness, flavor and complexity to shame even the Starbucks’ favorite.

An overall caffeine sceptic, for long, I was confident of my health when the people talked about anti oxidants and balanced diets. No.. I am no health quirk but it never occurred to me that I was missing anything nutrition wise. Good healthy food, stimulating beverages…just about everything! Tea was also doing fine, till I fell seriously ill in the fall of 2017.

I was diagnosed with acute pancreatitis!

And nobody could actually determine the cause for this mortal condition! Everything changed thereafter. The recovery was slow and painstaking. The attending surgeon was fussy and stern…and warned me to go easy with tea.

So I started looking around for shortcuts to improve my gut health. Like many things that I loved to eat and drink but had to let go, I decided to go blind with tea as well. I had realized that it was merely worsening my infirmity.

To cut it short, eventually it all ended up with me becoming a black coffee drinker! Of course I get to add a teaspoon of sweetener (usually white sugar) to my coffee.

It was while I was convalescing and looking ways to less complicate my caffeine intake, that the story that went into coffee making caught my attention.

Search me… it’s interesting!

Legend has it that the 9th-century Ethiopian goatherd Kaldi was the first to discover the stimulating effect of coffee when he noticed how excited his goats became after eating the beans from a certain bush. Curious, he too chewed on the bright red berries himself. Roused and exhilarated, he brought the berries to a nearby monastery. But the monk disapproved of their use and threw them into the fire. A seductive enticing aroma billowed out that drew others to come and investigate. The roasted beans were quickly raked out from the embers, grounded and dissolved in hot water thus yielding what was World’s first cup of coffee!!

The story is largely believed to be apocryphal; probably because it surfaced some 800 years from the time when it supposedly took place.

Whatever…

Okay, so maybe you already prefer a dark roast brew…

That’s good, but if you were to ask me, you ought to experience every type of blend that exist before you get to decide which one you love most..and which ones a tad less! Once you learn to savor your drink, you’ll have a newfound respect for your local java shop.

Spoon into your perfect coffee bliss: It’s not blah anymore!

While the beans you grind are essential for the flavor profile of your cup, how you brew it is just as important. To call yourself a coffee barista, you need to know all that there is to different brewing methods from different parts of the World and how they affect the taste.

So, here’s to some lip smacking ways to whip yourself a cuppa good coffee.

Pour-over, hand made and without machines, try it the way they do in India! Smooth frothy and beaten up, the Indian cappucino is a powerful espresso that comes topped with a sweet foam laced with some fresh cream and a sprinkle of bitter cocoa.

My pick however is a more trendy go-to-spice one. I tried the spice-laced one once and got hooked up instantly; flavors aside I thought-the benefits are worth it. Now I almost always add cinnamon to my coffee. The zing of this piquant candidate perks up my mood in no time, whenever I don’t feel like using cocoa powder straight.

High on antioxidants and anti-fungal properties, even cayenne pepper, ginger, cardamom, nutmeg, lavender, star anise, clove, pumpkin spice and gingerbread spice mix-all in small quantities- are inching out that square of dark chocolate from coffee these days!

Am I asking you to take a blind shot at this unusual blend? Is this an easy way to stomach those beneficial spices and fiber right through your coffee cup without having to open multiple containers?

Probably ‘ Yes’.

Spices work just great when added to grounded coffee or to dark beans and have significant health benefits.

And it doesn’t taste gross either!

The ways of Beaten coffee

I think this whole coffee craze is a bettered version of a new beverage trend that has coffee recipes popping all over social media.

The Indian filter coffee-southern style is one bodacious rage that is getting heads turned and attentions arrested!. Simply put, it is an easy and absolute fad among the coffee lovers who have chanced upon it.

This decadent Indian style coffee is somewhat similar to cappuccino in that it uses both espresso and steamed milk. The name ”beaten” comes from the process of whipping up the silky smooth and thick mixture that sits atop the brew. By hand beating instant coffee, sugar and water you always end up with the delicious brief.

Making it is simple and takes little to prepare. Brewed coffee using standard drip maker or French press is topped off with the mix of steamed milk (no scorching hot one please!), instant coffee, sugar and warm water, all beaten earlier till the mix turns golden brown and thickens into a smooth frothy mixture.

The aroma and flavors are simply a coffee connoisseurs’ delight and absolutely irresistible!!

Image source: ‘Coffee That Smells Like Freshly Ground Heaven’ in paramparai.store.

South Indian filter Kappi: What an utter delight!

Filter kappi, filter coffee, South Indian filter coffee; call it by whatever name, it is easily every coffee lover’s sigh of contentment.

Do you know why?…

It has one single characteristic that caffeine fanatics love to lust over; the unmatched blend of taste, flavor and the aroma. Even if you are not a coffee addict, nothing would better your mood than to wake up to a cup of freaking good, steamy, aromatic coffee- filtered and made traditionally the South Indian way!

Am I getting ahead of myself?

No… you wouldn’t dare rip through me, once you get to taste a pour of freshly roasted, grinded and filtered punch. Every cup’s a delight and the proper way to awaken your senses first thing in the morning! You’ll love the aroma as you sip away the traditional Madras belter.

For not long ago, I wouldn’t know anything of how to brew a good cuppa! I wasn’t eager enough to rush for it either. Not until I figured out how to make a humble brew into something so atrociously good and overbearing.

I got to travel down South last year on vacation. And there the curiosity trumped me.

I somehow got hooked to filter coffee!

Till then whenever I had attempted to do something with those dark beans, the brew would always end up being too watery. Every time I attempted, it turned out dreary; so much so that I could easily pour half a cup of brewed coffee into half cup of milk and still wouldn’t get it to be as strong as I’d like it to be.

It’s only from the by lanes and streets of Chennai (erstwhile Madras) that I learned the trick to make some really good stuff. It was some serious technique that led to some seriously good coffee in the end!

South Indian coffee requires only an indigenous coffee filter to make it right. You might think that plenty of them are lying around or one could be fashioned out; but this one is different; nothing like the regular ones! To taste authentic South Indian coffee it needs to be brewed through this unique stainless steel contraption; believe me; filtering effects are nearly impossible to replicate.

Consisting of two nested cups sitting atop each other; the one at the top holds the grounded coffee and has pores to allow the coffee to pass through while the other one is meant to store it.

Filter kaapi when served in a traditional tumbler-davaraa, all swished a couple of times between the two to produce delicious foam on the top, smells and tastes heavenly. A davaraa is a small cup shaped like a jug with a curved lip. (In some Udupi joints it is fondly called Meter-Kappi and is poured into the glass from a meter’s height to perk up maximum foam).

But you really don’t need one for a genuine Indian filter coffee. Any pair of mugs or cups would do. I wouldn’t approve of swishing though, for those who love it steaming hot. The disadvantage of swishing is that your coffee gets cold easily.

Feature credits: ‘Top Coffee Countries | The Best Coffee in the World 2021’ by Revel in You tube .com on Jul.09, 2020.

Heads-up! A storm of #coffee stories might be coming your way.

If you are with me just for the coffee and earnestly care about how your cuppa coffee should taste, then jump for a traditional Indian percolator with a clean filter, put 2 heaped tbsp of coffee powder and press it down with a spoon. Gently pour fresh water brought to a rolling boil and get an even concentration of decoction in the end. Mix a little bit of chicory and fill milk to 3/4th of the glass. Stir constantly and you have just made yourself a unique filter style complex and aromatic smooth cup of coffee.

Mild or strong- you get to enjoy the aroma and flavors with every sip. Add sugar if you wish and enjoy!

If I were you I would figure out ways to hold back things for tomorrow and start fishing around for a percolator ASAP -just the right one and get my coffee fix each morning-the Indian way!! Believe me, every cup is a delightful and legit way to awaken your senses first thing in the morning with an intense sensual kick.

Still unsure if that would be anything close to a third wave coffee shop?

Make no mistake- you are no pinhead; you’re right there. Just remember, ‘You can never be a wine connoisseur without ever being to a vineyard.

So, reach out, grab a perfect cup of that bold Indian filter coffee and feel a huge uptick happening right away!

Yup!…I won’t judge you!!

It feels so good to be a #Sloth-My guide to finding happiness the lazy way!!

“I choose a lazy person to do a hard job. Because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.”Frank B. Gilbreth Sr.

When getting out of bed feels awful, when going to the gym seems utterly disgusting and when you just can’t face the idea of siting down at the Office desk, I could figure out what has happened to you. You have crossed into the dangerous territory of laziness! The thief of happiness and poacher of ambition, it will end you up doing nothing with your days, if you let it get hold of you. Quite simply you are ‘dumped but not down’ for you have missed seeing the error of your ways.

Want some help to get out of the funk? Check-out on me on how to trump the struggle and fight blues the lazy way. Sometimes the best way to make stuff happen and relive happiness is by doing nothing at all!

Image source: ‘Dangers- Sleeping with a blanket over the head’ by Richard Adjei in news.payperlez.com on May 25, 2021.

I live in a messy chaotic world. Yet I am perfectly content doing nothing at all. I no longer punish myself and do not let reluctant party animals, chronic slow pokers and clutter of messy desk wizards to hurt me for being a slow pusher any more. Not that I have been like this always. It’s just that one fine morning I discovered that it was not the laziness but my giant intellect that’s to blame for my misadventures. So, I reworked myself out. I lied to my enormous brain down to a nap with pride. And look!! The hard work of being lazy has paid off.

I have finally found happiness!

Funny; I wonder why it feels so good to be lazy in the first place. Why things do not turn turtle for work-shy people; rather everything would start falling into place more intensely? Why all this shade against doing nothing? Why an unenterprising soul is underrated when being lazy might turn him a ‘Kingsomeday. What’s more shocking is that whenever I reached out to romanticize laziness, I ended up get around ways to overcome it.

Feature credits: ‘Study Finds Lazy People Are Smarter’ by Jacqueline Sarkissian in You tube.com on Aug.18, 2016.

So, I decided not to waste time on unnecessary motions; instead I looked around for clues to trick it into my fold and #find the balance between work and weariness.

And see, this is what I learned;

The Hard Work of Being ‘Lazy’

Laziness is something we all experience from time to time, but some people simply love to stay in that refuge forever, once out of that everyday slavery. And there’s a pretty good reason why they adore it so much! They allow their minds to wander into creative territory for free…by being lazy!!

I guess we all are hardwired to fill time. We easily get overwhelmed by things that are on our to-do list and plunge headlong each day, trying as hard as possible to burn ourselves out.

I find this distracting. Do overs or not; for me unrewarded geniuses are not geniuses but clichés.

Interestingly, one study claims that the more the intelligent among us socialize or work heads-down the less happy and sullen they become. The more you mingle, the more intent you get on spilling your guts around telling everybody how happy you are, without being so; the more half-witted jerk you turn yourself into. This sniffs less savory to the more intelligent ones. And the nerd in you stays outclassed as ever.

It’s not so difficult to figure it all out yourselves! Besides who says the world needs Type A personalities only? The ‘L’ types are not like some failed menu item and will eventually land in some rut. Amid misplaced sense of FOMO, a ‘knightly’ life beckons them.

If you are anything close to me, take a sec off and stop being busy. Check yourself out.; what tempts you more, an hour-long walk with your dog, or a snug spell with your pet cat on your favorite couch; all lazed-up?

Well, this might surprise you. If you think that being snug and comfortable in your space and doing nothing, slurs you as a remiss; you are mistaken! This could actually be a sign of intelligence, and not an inclination to remain sedentary or desk bound.

If we are to trust the ethereal revelations of a wispy study made some eight years ago; then cat lovers score higher on intelligence than dog lovers. And why not? It makes some good sense too. A dog person is livelier because he goes out there walking and talking even to strangers with a tethered canine in tow. Contrary to this, if you are more introverted and sensitive, you would probably prefer to stay back at home, read a book, sip a cuppa tea…and your cat doesn’t need to go outside for a walk.

You may not believe this but your pet type influences your choice between different environments. Dog- you take a walk, Cat- you covet the cozy comfort of a couch with your cheesy Ginger snuggled in your lap.

Get the hang of it! Even a brief interruption derails our train of thoughts. Walk your dog and you are distracted by sight of every passerby. It’s like you went too close to another browser tab and got distracted by a cat video. Hang around your home with your cat and you do not let yourself be beaten by those fast-track requests that your quick witted brain lines up fast for you!

At some time or the other all of us get miffed in this mad mad world for one reason or the other. At times bitterness and despair is overwhelming. We are put off partly because we are worried that we have not done enough and largely because we believe that allowing ourselves to be lazy might not be the perfect antidote for that garden variety stress.

Uh oh! Search your soul…No do overs but I guess you know there are ways to be a heartthrob to yourself. Perhaps you’re not lazy after all, or maybe it’s just that your good old brain is playing tricks!

My idea of a perfect laziness however means snacking on a couch, watching telly or solving cross puzzles. This might shock you but I discovered that laziness is what got me interested in being productive at the end; getting more done in less time and getting more time to relax.

Today taking a break feels rewarding to me. I find it ok to allow myself to be lazy occasionally; not because I am a big fan of being lazy, but because I want to be happy. Take a break and be a little lazy yourself if you cherish the same. Next time if someone accuses you of being a sloth, just tell yourself, “I believe he meant to say highly efficient”.

Image source: ‘3 Ways Having a Lazy Weekend Can Be Good for Your Health’ by Lexi Petronis in glamour.com on Ap. 26, 2013.

Shortcuts will cut you short

Most of us are usually bad at being ‘lazy’. And by that I mean not only the mindless distractions that occupies our space and attention; I’m talking about choosing to do nothing; rather prefer being idle. Much of the day we spend checking things off from our to-do list believing it to be of little consequence.

Hell no; this does help!

Our brains are hard wired to focus on things that we find both novel and threatening. Why else would you check news or social media every 10 minutes or worry over some stupid prickly e-mail that you received a week ago? If you are the one who would skip after-work drinks for some other night on the settee and stretch your evenings for a zero-guilt day, you probably are n every hawk’s live checklist every time you enter your Office.

But there is a downside to laziness too!

Getting stuck indoors could make things uncanny; even worse. You tend to get slave to running checklists, always worried about being productive, cramming more things-to-do in a day’s time and in bargain give up things that make you happy. Taking a walk or reading a book or hanging around with friends- you miss all. Unable to perk up your surroundings, no sweet talks with your flame! The squeeze is too hard to stay pumped up all day long. Sure, you are neck deep in weeds and all set to get a miserable heartache and a grumpy evening!

So, if a lazing mindset isn’t always the right choice why Danes and Finns are the happiest persons in the World? Why the chase of getting things done the right way, is no longer an infernal experience for them? Dare find them work shy! No…rather it’s the brilliance of a drifting mindset that makes you more creative and better at problem solving. This is when your focus rests and your brain puts pedal to the metal.

It’s massive! But your brain worries about the future 14 times more during spells of idleness or laziness, compared to being attentive to just one thing when you are kicking around. It literally occupies 48 percent of your bootless time mostly weighing your long term goals and intentions! Try remembering the last time you cooked up some creative idea or worthy solution! Chances are that it didn’t happen when you were hell-bent to finish things before upheaval happened. Instead genius in you may have touched the nerve softly when you have been taking a long shower or sitting on a park enjoying the surroundings.

When you laze and allow your brain to rest, you actually save on your mental pluck and get to expend it on more and more of right things. Hardly anything runs dry your mental strength than an anxious mind and the fear of missing out.

Best way to waylay it?

Just stop running wild, catch your breath, close doors to your mind and let it do nothing; no logic, no reasoning, no judgment- just plain Zero. Cool your heels till it tells you what it needs rather than what it cries for.

To begin with you could stop being obsessing over news; Go take a walk; watch some Netflix, listen Mozart or just soak yourself in a nice leisurely warm bath. It might just be the right thing for you to do. Be crazy to be lazy for once and you get to turn into more productive person than you would ever imagine.

Not long ago, like everybody else I too believed that success stems from hard work alone; but today I find myself rescued. I have reclaimed myself. It didn’t come to me from hard work. It’s rather the lazy way of doing things that have done sheer good to me.

The only difficult part is to see myself a sloth bear. From a rewarding guy to a disinclined and forgettable creep! To work with it instead of against it; sounds weird doesn’t it?

Yet I have triumphed! I have taken to the lazy way of doing things and I have prevailed!

How good will it work for you? Maybe a little; maybe not at all. May be you will get success working long hours and pummeling your nose in the grindstone. But would you prefer not to take the bite if you haven’t tried being lazy? How would you know that it doesn’t work even better? Take a shot, you might like it; even hit the bulls’ eye.

I get plenty of “me” time outside sleeping and dreaming

For the last few days, I kinda feel strange; weird perhaps. I don’t feel like doing anything;

Leave aside work and laze-off? Yes; Screw-around? Maybe.

It is the guilt of doing nothing that has set me up. I get mad at myself and mess with happiness. Easily it is the end of creativity after a day of laziness.

But not all is at it seems! Laziness tend to lie to us and if you think that that’s a problem, then you are bending it and being untruthful to yourself.

Laziness is irksome only because it slows down the time for us. It’s upsetting but it leads to a new insight. For me it works like an early warning system. It’s a sign that I am about to burn out for being overly worked.

The thought itself is horrific and isn’t really an accident!

Feature credits: ‘If you are a lazy person then Watch this’ by daily Motivation in You tube.com on Oct. 14, 2019.

This is when the need to endure kicks in. It tells me that I am a jerk if I don’t get my lazy bum into action, I might be destroying myself for good. Do I need to be on my knees any longer?

The other day I sat quietly and mused. I found myself comparing my present workdays to the ones at my last job. At first, it seemed like I was working a lot less with no 9-5 job.

I deep dived and realized that I had panicked for no reason. I had posted twice as many weblog stories, picked up couple of on-line courses, read three times as many books, network with 5x more people and presently writing a new story. Am I suffering from self-doubt! Am I scattered and seeing Ghosts! Bumbled or fumbled but in the end…I felt relieved.

It’s so weird how we suddenly dig up the advice we need at the exact moment we need it.! Interestingly, my brain’s anatomical connectivity no longer sympathizes with anything that leads to the idea of”I’m lazy”! It is riveted to the belief that ‘I am working when I am not working‘!

If I were you, I would rather fancy these vibes not as something cold and crippling but a queer sign of revolt from a worn-out body crying for a break.

When you notice the truth behind your laziness, it’s possible to take a lesson or two to your advantage. It took me years altogether to learn that we are at work when we are doing the dishes, having a shower or tidying up the garden. These idle chores help to connect our hardwired brain to rewarding tasks that are on our to-do list. In fact, when we laze, our body betters all inputs while everything else is on hold.

Laziness is perhaps one sin you need most to make a better sense of the world. Trust me, if your lack of laziness causes your impending meltdown, Gods are not coming to save you.

At first sight it may seem to banish us from living successfully or from thinking in any way well of ourselves. But at close quarters things look brighter and shining. If the point of ‘doing nothing’ is to clean up our heart of hearts wouldn’t it be right to get down to the business of lolling?

After all, the threat to our happiness lies not in our failure to be busy, but in our inability to be “lazy” enough. A heroically hardworking person isn’t necessarily the one, who sits in the business lounge of an International airport; it might be the person who gazes out of the window and occasionally writes down an idea or two on a piece of paper.

Do what you have to do for laziness is not a lie

If you have a smartphone, which obviously like everybody else you do, it’s most likely that you have often struggled with the idea of “shutting down” after work. As you sit idle or perhaps watch a movie or listen to a podcast; a voice at the back of your mind keeps telling you that instead of being lazy, you ought to be on your phone cleaning out the inbox or readying yourself for tomorrow’s meeting.

Image source: ‘Laziness leads to happiness’ in mashupcorner.com on Sep. 01, 2021.

Believe me, your inability to stop working, or even the inability to do so without guilt, harms your enterprise more than your resolve to stay upbeat. If you truly are a sworn work horse, then you need to learn how to be lazy for this is all about efficiency and none of us is inherently lazy.

In fact, the challenge to this frailty lies with the guilt that overrides it. There is so much happening around us every day, so many excitements, regrets, suggestions and emotions. Are we not letting the marrow of life escape us? Is there nothing smart enough to reign it in?

You need not dig deep to find the answer!

Whenever you get lazy and desire for an intensely-felt life clean of all ruckus, sit back and imagine that a deep part of you is hustling to cook-up a big thought. Make no haste; though you run the risk of being accused of gross laziness! Plan your laze interlude in advance. When you schedule it you would know the duration of your subconscious shame for having done nothing. Complete your errands beforehand and it will inwardly feel good.

Consider making a day of your indolence and get cracking instead of freaking out. Get lazy on a regular basis and you will find out why not falling shy of it makes a heap of difference. Your mind is all stoked and will help you get out of the weeds; fix the broken ideas and mend your missing control.

For a productivity guy, you’ve become a sloth bear. But what the heck… don’t fret. Simply prioritize, no overtime and you will get the most done in shortest possible time!

Laziness is your free wellness tool with zero guilt

Haven’t you heard less is more?

Image source: ‘It’s Good to Be Lazy’ by Atulhost in atulhost.com on May 26, 2019.

There is a creative side to all of us. When we are lazy we get plenty of time to toy and tinker within us. Getting cheered for being a busy-bee is a burden now. People do not want to hear about how busy your life is. Besides, you miss out on your friends. You are never in a mood to head out on a Saturday night or burn yourself a little on a weekend run.

Not that you are not left with enough time to rouse the clever and gifted person that you always were.

Simply side step for a moment and choose to be different for a while. You have just aced the art of living life the right way! And remember, if you howl and cry for long, are unable to keep the desk tidy, fail the assignments any other time than the night before the deadline or lament for having ruined so much time doing nothing; you could be the one with a giant IQ!

In fact being lazy is another way of being efficient.

I think lazy persons are onto something all the time! Go ahead, take that nap and shake off all the fears of going overboard. It’s better rather you chill with a cat than walk a dog.

You will always end up beaming!

And someday, your mind and body will thank you for it!!

To be or not to be…Friends surprisingly make you a happier person, only if you could be with the real ones!!

If you think that you are done with friends in life, it’s time you tell yourself a different story.

Like love, friendship is a thick soupy word and a messy business. It’s hard to be friends with someone who couldn’t hold your hands, or cut loose your heart strings. It’s harder to look for companionship if it comes with the shroud of secrecy surrounding it. Friendship is rather a stretchy word. It’s more of a life choice that you hesitate to fully buy into, fearing darker truth may come out later.

Friendship means something different every time we say it. It’s what a relationship isn’t. You may find good mature acquaintances but they don’t really get you good lasting friendship. At times hopelessly vague; ‘calling them a friend’ doesn’t help. Let’s just be friends” is a no less confusing either because it could mean anything. From bosom friend to pink of a crush, all it does is communicate what you never meant in the first place.

In fact, there is not one single great word for the kind of relationship that you have with the ones you love or loved. Give the requited attention a miss and the other person won’t find you awesome enough to hit it off.

Yet you shrug and say, “Sure.” And try again. But it’s weird and gets murkier.

When you think about it, you have no idea what it means to be with real friends.

Think about them and you will still touch yourself.

Perhaps ‘friend’ is a catch-all high sign that helps in ignoring bittersweet emotions.

Get into the Act

I grew up a shy introvert with terrible socializing barriers and was often shelled with embarrassing suggestions by those around me. Honestly, I did muster enough courage to try them all and overcome my fears. But soon I realized that it’s lot easier and more effective to be kind than to try to act confident.

I never tried to compete with the extroverts. I let them win at their game. Instead, I decided to invent my own circle—went all-in on being as thoughtful as possible and this is what I found out.

Everyone loves to hang out one time or the other, with the person who won’t say or do anything to hurt your feelings. But not wanting to hurt someone’s beliefs and opinions isn’t friendship. Real friends never coddle egos. They always tell the truth, love spending time together and never get awkward in each other’s company. Good news, bad news and secrets, they share everything. Gossip and late night wakes; it’s all part of lives in bonhomie.

Like everybody else, I too wanted to be friends with every single person on this planet. Probably more so, but not with someone who wants kinda attention that I’d prefer not to give. I had learned that coming out with the truth was way better off than using words that are so vulnerable to misinterpretation. When you tell somebody you want to be friends, but you really don’t, you are not letting them down gently. Mocking hits like a harsh acquittal. It hurts no matter how gently you have hurled the bomb.

Perhaps sometimes we get to learn about friends the hard way.

Are true friends hard to get by!

In university one of my buddies fell hard for a gal who wasn’t into him. She had a crush for a guy Robin who looked smarter and was perhaps wealthier. Of course, Robin wasn’t into her.

It confused and hurt everybody, especially my mate.

But it was kinda different too. Both heand the girl were doing fine and everything a couple would, except touch. Dates, long walks, deep conversations, partying ; it seemed fascination was blossoming. One day he asked her if she thought friendship could turn into romance. He would muse how his mom couldn’t stand his dad before they got married. A day later she uninvited him to a party.(Robin was going to be there.). What followed was enough to shake up things badly. Sullen moods and peppery behaviour crept in slowly. Finally he couldn’t take it anymore, and stopped returning her calls.

A year went by, and then one day both ran into each other. She came up and regretted. “Can we be friends?”

“What do you mean…?” he asked.

“If I see you, I’d like to come up and say hi.” It sounded more like she wanted him to acquit her of all guilt. Both agreed to smile and wave if their paths ever crossed. Fears of misplaced trust, broken promises and brazen lies, all fell apart in that one moment of regret.

Fortunately, he never saw her again.

That story tells what lot many people mean when they say they want to be friends, yet prefer kind of stealth friendship where deeper feelings never grow. If you are honest you usually wouldn’t want to bejust friends”. It’s hard but being real friendsmeans you don’t hold onto your emotions and actually make yourself available to someone who might requite your feelings.

Real life stories like this one grow on trees but payoffs are important!

Contemplating a relationship as a sack of rotten tomatoes when things turn sour, is like eyeing everything with serious skepticism. Crush aside, you should expect no one to be your real friend until you stop wanting romance to creep in your emotions. Before then, being around them will only rip your heart apart.

Funny! There is a simple fix for this

Nobody is hard wired to spend time crying out for someone who cheats under the cloak of stealth friendship, forever. And you need not hate somebody to realize that they are not good for you either. It’s nobody ‘s fault. The chemistry simply hasn’t struck. The slyness has prevailed!

So, gift yourself the truth! Firstly to be friends you need to ease off being sheep eyed. And in the second place, if you think of someone as your friend each time you look for favors; then honestly you are not ready for friendship.

Ease off till you could show some respect to your affinity. Pull up your head, put aside your phones and the world around you will no longer be clueless. Smiling, holding doors and saying hello to strangers; those powerful gestures will make you stand out. Seeing people, acknowledging them, showing some respect might mean you are charming and perhaps charismatic too. Trust me, the frenzy of warm hands reaching out to you, in turn, would leave you overwhelmed.

But is it enough to get you good friends; the real ones?

Countless times I have met people who didn’t click right away, only to be heard of later with a friendly gesture of sorts; sometimes through a mutual friend on social networking, at others maybe for a book exchange or casual film recommendation. These interactions spoke little but emotionally measured high. I guess, it’s kinda hard for me now to dislike someone who was thoughtful enough to have gone to lengths and make an effort to reach out!

Some people couldn’t make easy initial connections. If you are one of them, give yourself some time to dazzle. Once you think you have made the right choice and want to make a connect, reach out with whatever little beans you could muster to make their lives a bit brighter, even if in a small way.

Today, I gather I was right about my insights in the first place. Aches and pains not withstanding, I had aced the key to finding a soul buddy!! You may find my suggestions a tad basic, but that’s the point! If I have learned anything during my journey from a shy, floundering kid to a quiet thoughtful, self inventing, all smiles person who takes stock of the world in HD, I believe I did my basics well enough to have led myself so well.

If you are an introvert, don’t curse yourself for this innate skill. Hang on to it, for the one who listens, is rare and precious. Only a handful of us actually has this gift that sets us apart. Don’t chide yourself either, if you couldn’t hold onto to your lead. “You only get one chance to make a first impression”; every Tom, Dick and Sally would love to tear into you. Sure! But a lot has changed and this cliche’ is your buried past now. Chance to strike a conversation is just a click away!

How would you feel if you open your phone and a message is waiting from someone you just met, wishing you well for your upcoming interview? Or how about you sending a one-of-a-kind get-well-soon message to your ailing elderly neighbor?

Uh oh! No this isn’t about copywriting beauty and the beast. Privy characteristics such as kindness turn emotions toasty, takes the chill off and outwits brains and air when it comes to accepting connections! So do a little jig, get yourself out of the weeds. You will have fun and find joy reaching out to real friends.

Feature credits: ‘A Real Friendship’ by manu7 production in youtube.com on Dec.19, 2017.

Happiness needs a warm hand

A real friendship never sucks! It stems from mutual understanding and respect. It’s not meant to serve pleasure or purpose all the times. Rather a good friend is for friendship sake; the gold equivalent of human relationship. A lucky few of us might get a handful of real friends in our lives and it shouldn’t matter if they are relatively new. It’s their uniqueness that makes them amazing and priceless.

I have always found the intriguing connection between friends, happiness and longevity a bit weird but promising. The cutting edge made me feel zesty. I found myself surrounded by good people- people who never failed to remind me if I needed a haircut; people who complimented me and hauled me over in crises. Life never fell short of league of gentle folks. Listen, watch, notice and praise…these were small actions, but they helped me feel good for everything about me, admire myself and have strong ties with others.

If you are anything like me, rub some dirt on your fears, sell yourself a lot of quality friendship and trust me, you will ripe through a ‘golden-over-the-hill’ life. Try not to forget that real friends are meant to share concerns and confidences, build trust and not always be a sham listener or a crazy admirer.

Sometimes you cannot push a special connection between friends. It just happens. Two people come together, who find ease between them instantly and are comfortable in their skins. Laughing away at silly jokes for hours or talking the night away; a lasting relationship begins to fall into place between two people who understood each other well by simply being themselves. The spark wouldn’t douse even if the two “thieve” enormous pint or two of bourbon and celebrate!

So! where would you find the kindred-spirit that accommodates your mood, occasionally mimics intimacy and excites you in ways different than those you would otherwise face when spending time alone; quietly. Could you think up of an egghead who has all the signs of a true friend? Where should you look for one and know if that somebody is the big Daddy you were hunting for?

Taverns, bars, coffee shops, clubs, and even rec rooms are the usual joints that foster inner circles among people. Yeah! This is the tribe of savvy thinkers who will get you to realize that all that sweating, lifting and walking is not absolutely necessary for finding happiness. It is here that sharp contrast of unselfish indulgences change hands. It is here that your voice could finally get to grow some teeth. And, it is here that a good Johnny-on-the-spot could hammer some sense out of your successes, failures, opportunities and help you choose differently.

Someday you will make the naysayers jealous

I never realized that rushing lifestyles could reduce relationships into commodities so fast. It has left every relationship hanging by thread and every affinity slain of excitement. In all our complexities, we have shrunk to titles and net worth and eye each other as a means to an end. It is difficult to know who is legit and who pretends.

It all feels so punishing and fiendishly difficult…isn’t so?

Putting on a smiley face or saying right things and turning their back when the going gets tough, makes a difficult choice between deceit and uprightness. Props in hard times alone do not matter. A friend is someone who genuinely wants to see you succeed and is happy to see things go well for you in life; each time, every time. A true mate loves the person you are, with all the flaws and quirks and imperfections.

That doesn’t mean friends agree all the times. Rattling opinions help expand horizons! If your choice has been the right one, you will find yourself surrounded with people who share your values but warn you the moment you start falling off the track.

Worse luck! if your buddy wouldn’t help you to make the right choice even if that means saying something that you never wanted to hear in the first place.

“Don’t walk behind me, I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me, I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.” ~ Albert Camus.

Close affinities like good friends just don’t pop out of nowhere and mature fast. So, if you happen to have more than a handful of real good ones, you are indeed blessed. Making and keeping real friends smells of a rare experience. Each lasting friendship represents a world within us, a world that is not born until they arrive. And it is only when we bump into each other, a new world is born for us.

So, get busy being an amazing human being. Be a good one and knight hearted. If you haven’t reached out in a while to the people in your life who love and support you; learn to do so. The awe of discovering a BFF will smitten you for good. Perhaps then you could make out what Mary Tilley (94) of two children, four grandchildren and two great-grandchildren, meant of Evelyn Hodge as friend- they had lived next door to each other for over 72 years in Britain– when she mused;“Evelyn is great company”.

Someday you too might as well get to get a real good friend who celebrates life with you.

Till then, keep smiling and face up…

It’s never too late to walk off into the sunset!!

Who moved my Pâte à choux? :12 insanely charming and generously forgiving ‘Tuck-away’ foods for a zesty dine!

Indulging your sweet tooth with a smart choice could sometimes save you from gorging hastily onto leftover chocolate chip cookies in the rec room. Watch out for those boring low-cal foods; stick to them or you could cool off with a scoopful of delightful tuck-away choices. Munch on delicious fudgy brownies or slurp on the gooey goodness of warm chocolate lava cake, just keep an eye for the size and you will never need to miss the fun!!

From a twice cooked, crisp, light and creamy pȃte à choux filled with vanilla ganache and grounded hazelnut paste, to a garlicky Korean Cream Cheese Bun or a chocolate chip cookie- crunchy at the edges and fudgey in the center; each has the remarkable pluck to hit the sweet spot every time and leave you surprised. Michelin perfect and raving over the spice n’ nice flavors, these good-for-you treats can seriously partner your sweet tooth.

“It sucks”? Not convinced either! You wonder if there is a reason why banana bread is such a rage after all ? What so good is there that could outclass traditional recipes and bowl you over with a single bite?

At some point or the other, if you crave for something sweet and find yourself looking for flavors on your table that are right from the get-go, you are not alone. Strong cravings usually get mushy in emotionally charged moments; Or is it only a nutritionist nightmare!

There is always a good chance that dusting off your mixer to whip up something sweet or sauntering off to nearest Patisserie might work as a good getaway for your sagging spirits. Sounds good, only if you could find a simple but delicious food with spin off flavors that could help and skyrocket your mood! If you were to ask me; for a best possible experience, try a coconut sponge cupcake with a swirl of buttercream on top and a jammy surprise of mango compote in the middle for a start. Swipe right and the exploding flavors will smitten you into love!

So, what roasts and bakes should you reach out and accept? And—most importantly, without compromising your nutritional needs? Should you dig into foods that are simple and satisfying but come with a blast of sugars? Choosing treats comes with its own set of problems!

Sugar isn’t something to eat freely.

Remember back when single-crusted, whipped-cream-topped, custard-based wonder -the cream pie was considered healthy? It existed simply as an unearthly way to use up surplus eggs and milk dying in the freezer, but lately thrived into ubiquity.

Speaking of cream pies, do you recall that classic French fruit tart, one that was essentially a single-crusted custard pie topped with sugar-glazed fresh fruit? Slender, colorful and mildly-flavored, this sweet was a staple of dessert carts and somehow managed to pass as a brunch selection at some of the fancy dines; no more! Heathilicious! “Uh-oh! Take cover!” Your teeth do not need to hurt or fall off just because you have decided to indulge in something sweet? For many years, I didn’t either, but now I know; you can eat sweet, keep your teeth and have a good beat!

If you have just finished a scrumptious healthy dinner and look for something sweet to quell your craving-light on calories, sugar and carbs but big on flavors– reach out to ones that are balanced and on a healthier track! Honestly who wouldn’t want to eat plenty of calories and then binge on easy treats that taste sweet and decadent but won’t leave you with a sugar crash!

For many of us, everyday dinner is like a light-on everything else, but joy. It feels more like a lackluster vinaigrette that would want you to skip the salad altogether. So, there is nothing wrong if you feel like you need a cleanse, as you did after all those Christmas cookies! Not like a juice cleanse but just don’t feel like eating cookies for sweets everyday kind of cleanse. If you are like me, eating dessert isn’t optional; I simply am not satisfied till I dig into something sweet. And just because you have a knack for eating healthy; doesn’t mean you ought to let go of a decadent taste and fiery flavors.

If you are hankering for something sweet but on the opposite side of the Cheesecake Factory horizon, look no further beyond these 12 incredibly addictive, healthy and guilt free foods, that run high on flavors but are light on everything else.

Turmeric sourdough toast

Feature credits: ‘How To Make Turmeric Bread Recipe’ by Top Food Eli in Youtube.com on Feb. 28, 2021.

This honey glazed toast, topped with a generous dollop of fat free butter and nigella seeds, is quintessentially a simple but skilled brunch plate to turn to. Few love to experiment it with Chia and poppy seeds. Delivering on each count of bright yellow color and beautiful aroma of honey, yeast and spices, the toast pairs nicely with a towering glass of hot chocolate, whipped up thick with Callebaut (a Belgian chocolate brand) on a rainy afternoon. Come summer and it is the perfect time to begin working with your favorite jam and jelly toppings. Could you ask for anything more of a perfect brunch? And to think you could drive right past your ‘tuck-away’ spot!

Uniquely organic the sourdough loaf has spicy, warming notes of turmeric and black pepper all holed-up in an airy chewy bread that is perfectly balanced with the natural tang of sourdough. Great for making some lively sandwiches or unconventional bruschetta, this loaf is an absolute must for avocado toast! True to its name this is one singular bread experience you just couldn’t miss!

Almond Chocolate Mug Cake

Feature credits: ‘ Now you can enjoy Mug cakes ‘Gluten free” by Ashees cookbook in Youtube.com on Sep.08, 2020.

On a keto diet? No worries! If there is one food that could up your protein count and is a heart-healthy choice, it is a cozy warm mug filled with a sweet, simple, gooey and moist cake! Unlike other mug cakes that run aground because of the taste of prep-made mixes, this one comes packed with goodness of almond meal, maple syrup, cacao powder and extra virgin olive oil and is one smart choice that will perk up your nutrients with 5 grams of fiber,13 grams of protein and 3 mgs. of iron. After all, you’re definitely need not eat empty calories with a comfort food!

Convenient and gluten free, a single serve of this mug cake packs extra punch of chips, stirred-in after it is baked. Try it and you will find yourself taking a shot at it again and again. Just who wouldn’t spare 10 minutes for a meltingly heathilicious chocolate cake?

Almond Coconut Macaroon

Feature credits: ‘Coconut Macaroons’ by El Mundo Eats in Youtube,com on Jul.25, 2020.

Feeling stressed or bowled over! you are getting nostalgic for your favorite classic treats but also dread jumping over the line and ruining your workout tips. To bail out, take your comfort food a notch higher considering your health goal and taste preferences and try this homemade delight to make sure if it’s worth it. The real deal of eating this treat is that none of the ingredients are complicated. Shredded coconut, dark chocolate, egg whites and almonds, all come together to keep your heart healthy and cool, while keeping type-2 diabetes at bay! Naturally occurring polyphenols, offer anti inflammatory and anti oxidant effects to reduce the risk of chronic diseases, especially if you have sized up your crush modestly and opt for the recipe with at least 70 percent cacao.

In other words, this is one meal after that you could feel good about indulging in. Look out for flavors versions like Mango Chilli and Coconut Passion fruit- you will be awestruck!

Coconut Cream Pie Chia pudding

Image source:’Toasted coconut cream pie chia pudding’ in wecountcarbs.com on Sep.03, 2020.

If you are anything close like me then you must be spending a great deal of time thinking about food! We all usually lack creativity for day meals that could be simple and often confused with being ‘flat’; but did you ever think that even a small platter of coconut cream pie chia pudding could bring a little sensation to the dinner table? Rich and decadent this velvety coconut pudding has slices of banana and comes topped with coconut whipped cream and toasted coconut!

Chia seeds are the most versatile of FODMAP (Fermentable Oligosaccharides, Disaccharides, Monosaccharides, and Polyols, or say short-chain carbohydrates and sugar)fiber source. 10 gms /2 tbsp potion and you have just served yourself 8 gs of carbs and 8 gs of fiber!. Packed with Omega-3s, proteins and dietary fiber, this indulgent and nutrient dense pudding is a smart way to keep your gut healthy. Texture though is something that takes getting used to but health benefits are unassailable.

Could you think of a better low carb, keto friendly sweet treat to perk up your dinner spread! So, do yourself some good and indulge in this taste of tropical paradise!

Lemon and Yogurt syrup cake

Image source: ‘Lemon and yoghurt syrup cakes’ in taste.com.au.

If you think that you are a sucker when it comes to lemony delights, then this slightly tangy, flavorful, moist and totally delicious incredible cake is what you will love even waking up to, let alone enjoying after a quaint dinner. Marrying healthier options of coconut sugar, spelt flour and low fat Greek yogurt, this cake is a super moist and amazingly delicious end to your sweet craving. A simple lemon syrup brushed on while the cake is still warm, whips up magical flavors in each slice. For a twist, have it served with fruits, whipped cream, chocolate syrup or whatever you can think of. Berries with a light sprinkle of powered sugar make it the perfect way to have an angel treat, when you are on the go!

Cherry Coconut Yogurt Bites

Image source: ‘Cherry Coconut Frozen Yogurt Bites’ in probulin.com on Ap.16, 2021.

If those summery days are still all heat and sweat and your discomfort is inching up, chances are you are looking for something to cool you down. This refreshing convenience food tastes more like a chill cheesecake. Pureed cherries, coconut flavored Greek yogurt, maple syrup and shredded coconut; all blend together into a heavenly frozen bite!

Getting worked up over wrecking your fitness goals? Don’t fret; in bargain you get 1 gram of fiber and 5 grams of protein for each little frozen bite. Besides you score high on vitamins and minerals like vitamin-C and calcium also. (Each one cup of raw, pitted cherries gets you 10.8 mgs of vitamin-C.). If you are good on tweaked recipes, try lemon and blueberry combines for a start. Flavors here come together to make a super fresh, tangy and fruity treat. Eating it is almost like eating a pineapple flavored Paleta. Even strawberries and raspberries work really well and so do the peaches, nectarines or mangoes! With real ingredients and 45 calories or less per cup, this could easily be the newest sweet sensation to your private selection of desserts.

Lemon Pannacotta with Vodka Blueberry syrup

Manifesting an all Italian heritage, this inspired creamy lightly sweet tart, looks and tastes just as fancy. Served with some fresh fruit for added sweetness to balance out the tartness of lemon, every creamy bite of this molded chilled dessert is an oomph moment where the superbly complimenting tang of fresh berry sauce never misses the count. Turn your simple dinner, quick breakfast or casual brunch into a delightful escapade. It’s a lovely ending for a great dine. Looking beautiful and tasting great, it’s always a big hit with guests!

Frozen Strawberry Cheesecake

Image source: ‘Frozen Strawberry Cheesecake’ in dairyfarmersofcanada.ca.

If you are searching for a ‘ healthy’ low calorie treat, look no further! Using buckwheat, almonds, coconut and dates in the base instead of crackers, means this cheesecake has already cut down on processed sugars and added natural goodness. A delicious departure from the classic version, this 210 calories per serve cheesecake is all set out frozen with fresh strawberry and mint topping. Plus, the flavors are amped up even more, thanks to a drizzle of homemade strawberry topping sauce. The end result is the cake you are not just going to find anywhere!

Chocolate Pudding With Olive Oil and Sea Salt

Image source: ‘Egg-Free Chocolate Pudding With Olive Oil and Sea Salt Recipe’ by David Zinczenko and Matt Goulding in eatthis.com on Mar. 12, 2019.

Off the shelf puddings usually fare worst on calorie counts. Besides the flat regular chocolate flavor would often leave you bored and wondering if it was really worth the splurge! This home cooked version of chocolate pudding skips the eggs, cuts down on calories and goes easy on dime! Peppery olive oil and crunchy flakes of salt combine sublimely in this rich bittersweet chocolate recipe while flavors simply get fired up up with a drizzle of caramel sauce and fruity olive oil.

Still looking for a twist! If you want a pudding that comes little less smoky, ask for the one that does half smoked oil and half regular. Alternatively you could try lemon, lime or mandarin olive oil. Results will just be as amazing for this 310 calorie per serve dessert and won’t derail any of your healthy eating plans either.

Ginger-Carrot Pineapple Cake

Image source: ‘Easy Ginger-Carrot Pineapple Cake Recipe’ in eatthis.com on Jul.11, 2019.

A moist carroty delight with pineapple, chopped walnuts and topping of an easy-peasy cream cheese, this cake is one perfect combination of truly irresistible savory and sweet flavors. Grounded cinnamon, ginger and nutmeg make this tropical looking cake an all time treat that comes dotted with sweet raisins. Between the juicy pineapple and bright colored carrot ribbons, it is a perfect dessert for you to feel good about! Canned pineapple juice and finely chopped chunks whip up a fascinating zing that would leave with you with an insane crush for it. With 265 calories per serve, a dressed up cake with large shavings of toasted coconut never fails to take the center stage.

Cinnamon-Orange Lava Cake

In some places, dessert could simply mean a delicious piece of fruit. But there is everything so satisfying about this gooey lava cake! Watch the chocolate filling seeping out onto your plate as you slice through and the whole thing feels decadent! It might seem complicated but in fact it isn’t. Cinnamon and orange zest join bittersweet chocolate and pair perfectly to whip up a ramekin full of amazing flavors combination that you won’t forget anytime sooner. With 16 ingredients and 281 calories per serve, this spice enhanced chocolate orange flavored lava cake is an irresistible fare.

Mango and Turmeric raw cupcakes

Image source: ‘Raw Mango Cupcakes’ by Hana Mendes in onegreenplanet.org.

How often would you not find turmeric reserved in kitchen cupboards for savory dishes? Do you know that this earthy spice mingles perfectly well with sweeter flavors too! Incredible! But turmeric is just the thing to whip up a healthy treat. It’s loaded with curcumin, is amazing with antioxidant, anti inflammatory nutrients and livens up any recipe with a delicious earthy flavor and warm yellow hue.

Ever tried a turmeric laced dessert? From paleo turmeric ‘Cadbury’ Crème eggs to Mango-Ginger ice creams, turmeric adds an unexpected delightful taste that is simple but satisfying.

Spring is behind us and sunshine, blue skies and cool weather is around the corner. These bright, healthy orbs of sunshine make for an inspired dining anytime, every time! The unique touch of turmeric mingles seamlessly with the rich sweetness of refreshing mango, fresh turmeric, fresh ginger, lime and creamed coconut. The crust is a mix of almonds, sunflower seeds and medjool dates. Grain free and vegan, the recipe brings every bit of elegance to your table and tastes absolutely divine. Tweak it anytime! Fresh mango slices, flaked coconut or edible flowers; it’s a healthy and beautiful compliment to your search to eat savvy. And the possibilities are endless!

The more conscious you are about what you eat, the more you are likely to live longer!!

Here’s the thing about ‘tuck-away’ foods; They don’t have a black-and-white definition and you just can’t treat them like any other food. One way to go about them, is to eat them like Vitamins. Binging on these nutrient dense desserts would mean adding more protein, more fats and other foods besides sugar. This would of course have one wanting for more and if that’s you, it’s best you stay focused on ‘ just calories’. There is a time and place for enriched desserts, maybe; but your cheat day is not everyday, every time. Just remember that a mouthful could serve your half the recommended calorie intake!

Your craving for something sweet may rolls in and out and bother you persistently, but you don’t have to chill or deprive your sweet tooth completely. It’s still possible to indulge in without canceling all your hard fitness work. Everything in moderation” sounds OK, but the only problem is that if you are anything like me, you will have trouble stopping at few bites. Getting overboard is so easy and while sometimes it’s worth it, at others it pays not to go with so rich and super indulgent foods.

So! go ahead, freak out and ride a culinary rollercoaster with these best low pep tuck-away foods. You wouldn’t know but these calorie conscious foods could help you in shedding those pesky pounds without the worry of overdoing it!!

“I will find sunshine myself”- The hidden upsides of revenge eating and beyond!!

Food alone won’t make you happy if you cannot live by yourself.

Generally the word ’healthy’ and ‘revenge food’ don’t share space together. A late night ‘Jack in the box’ run or a quick cheeseburger on a road trip, each could hurt you if you cannot stay away from super-sized value options or settle for anything that is fast and easy, only because you are hurt bad and are on a trip to avenge blindfolded!!

But whatever you figure out to straighten things up, do keep an eye out for a food with plenty of nutritional value. Revenge or otherwise, you would do well to love being a winner in anger!

A romance with retribution is always bittersweet. It drives crime unashamedly; statistics say, up to 20% of homicides and 60% of random fatal killings!! And what more it shapes politics too. Even President Trump’s rush to Oval was nothing short of ‘revenge of working class”; those who felt cheated and abandoned had set the choice as an unforgiving sentiment.

Many of us would believe that vengeance against who have wronged us, is the only right choice to even out and the best way to avenge. In the heat of the moment it might feel relieving. This in fact is a powerful all pervasive emotion to get angry and wanting to hurt somebody who has harmed you. Have no doubts; the urge to avenge is all spiraling, reckless and self-inflicting. But then there is yet another one reason to celebrate its onset.

Post break up of revenge bout, the resulting lack of appetite will leave you slim n gorgeous in no time!! Who said I don’t care! A fitter, hotter, healthier and stunning you could make even your ex regret the heartache he caused you.

Revenge diet is not only about being depressed and ignoring food, all because of a weak or failing appetite. It merely adds to your woes. Revenge can never be your driving force and can never lead to anything worthwhile. On the contrary, it would make you look pale, weak and wasted. But the other side of the dime would nudge you to move on and be the eager beaver you had always wanted to be. So, be the live wire and give yourself some credit if you are a belly watcher and following a crash diet. Just don’t let that other person get away with all the credits. Love the break in the clouds and swap your anger with a pirated but healthy diet. After all, a revengicidal you is at best a vengeful jihadi on a crash diet. If you are on little Caesars diet, the ‘positive’ side of a revenge diet will walk you to losing weight in style.

But remember if you have chosen squirrel‘s diet just to make your ex jealous or uncomfortable to those who annoy you, the spite might be short lived and end once you have moved on. Close on heels will be your diet plan that would just go for a toss. If revenge was the sole motive you may gain more than you have lost! So stay positive and shed those extra kilos just for yourself. Nothing matters to anybody, once you or they move on even if you look a lot sexier after having lost weight. So who are you losing your weight for? Who could be your better audience than you yourself?  Go for treks, cycle, do yoga or simply meditate. And you are on your way to a healthier, slim looks. Just make sure that once out for revenge, the romance with anger stays positive for you and diet itself remains healthy. Depressed people usually tend to lose interest in food and shed weight in an unhealthy way that messes the scale once out of revenge. So if you are out for revenge and wish to fume with anguish and anger in a useful way without getting mired in vindictive rations, try on these foodstuff and overcome your spiteful frenzy without hurting yourself. Some of these are better served cold. Here are 10 of them to cheer up with and enjoy while crushing your enemies, etc., etc.

The lies we tell ourselves about revenge food: It’s healthy, it’s delicious!

“You would never give your child a can of beer but you don’t think twice about giving them a can of soda.” Dr. Robert Lustig .

Forgive those who have wronged you for they say this is good for your overall wellbeing! Who’re you kidding? How could you move on tied to some good, old-fashioned, intricately plotted revenge, served ice cold? This reminds me –some of your favorite food is best served cold! From screamin’ Sicilian Pizza to Bessie’s Revenge Cheese to spaghetti Bolognese, and from gazpacho to an icy martini, each favorite awaits to be eaten with a chilly disposition. Remember eating exotic is never considered a funeral food.

Ice cream sandwich

This one calls for baking one giant cookie. Try hard not to forget your revenge when you bake a giant cookie. Nothing would be more thrilling than eating a giant cookie in front of those who’ve wronged you, and not offering them a bite. No morsel would be just brutal and befitting.

Cucumber Soup with Mint, Watercress, and Feta Cheese

Fuming and feeling hot under the collar? Try this soup and feel your anger piping down to find you cool as a cucumber in a jiffy. Your luv for Feta though has just turned a tight corner! This is certainly not a recipe for weight loss, though it looks like one.

Image source: ‘Chilled cucumber dill mint soup with feta and red onion’ by Chef Andreia in dontask4rsalt. com

Time for a Regina George truly evil badass moment!!

Olive Oil Ice cream

Wondering if this frozen dessert is any good! “If it tastes really awesome?’ The answer is yes. It tastes as good as the aftermath of retribution!! What won’t taste good though is if you also push some sautéed onions and garlic in it and try it in a chocolate dipped waffle cone, sprinkled with cinnamon dust.

For the fun of it maybe you could just let that thought marinate with you for a while. The mirthful satisfaction of avenging silently is so brazenly gratifying that your stormy mood will find peace even if it is short lived. Choose a light-bodied fruity olive oil over its heavy peppery cousin and you will fall in love with the olive oil gelato, Great flavor and texture!! You just afford to miss the works.

Raspberry and Aperol Floats

This frozen delight will make you shut out all the insanity and ills for a while. And so would Aperol, that Italian bitter aperitif with a vibrant orange hue made of gentian, rhubarb, and cinchona, among other things. But what if you took your first sip of what seemed like some great creamy vanilla ice cream float, and instead you get to jab a straw into a monstrous frozen orb of ice? Call it a disaster that would be the worst, correct; the absolute worst. This edgy creamsicle, bittersweetly balanced and boasting of a crown of coral foam, is somewhat akin to Campari but is less boozy. Try it, you may end up admiring it for all the things gone wrong here!

Ajoblanco

A popular Spanish cold soup made of bread, crushed almonds, garlic, water, olive oil, salt and sometimes vinegar and usually served with grapes or slices of melon is essentially a more delectable version of white gazpacho. Traditionally made with green grapes the recipe is brightened up by adding green apple. It however, does little to your soothe your stormy mood as you dig in.

Feature credit:’ Ajoblanco- Spanish Garlic Soup Recipe’ by Happy Foods Tube in youtube.com on Aug 31, 2013.

The velvety texture is what makes it luscious for slurping, and atrocious to clean out of your favorite shirt!!

Watermelon Gazpacho

It’s pretty hard to be pathetic and be in a woeful mood when eating this bright pink, creamy and sweet soup—but this dish is exactly the kind of recipe that you could try for a perfect revenge food!

Feature credits: ‘ Watermelon Gazpacho’ by Currytrail in you tube.com on Jun. 19, 2019.

Light and refreshing, Watermelon Gazpacho is healthy, low fat and very easy to digest, sweet and spicy in taste. Perfect as a cold summer soup, Gazpacho is much like its tomatoey version but has a blend of watermelon, cucumber, bell pepper and tomato.

When you rake up gazpacho regularly, this soup improves overnight as the flavors get a chance to blend. It’s perfect for a light meal on a hot day. You can easily make a large batch and enjoy it for days!

Potato Salad with Pickles and Dill

Image source: ‘Dill pickle potato salad’ by Sue in theeviewfromgreatisland.com .

Creamy and chunky, this potato salad with pickles and eggs, tossed with creamy dill dressing is a perfect side dish for your summer rush for revenge foods. This is one of those foods which could give you some inspiration for a perfectly delicious revenge diet. So simple yet dreamily cruel, this is a different and delicious take on a not-so-traditional potato salad. If you are a dill pickle lover, this is the right revenge salad for you. Swap out the mayonnaise for low-fat mayo when you want this salad to be full of crunchy, dill pickle goodness!

If you find it hard to eat, try inviting yourself to this not-so-delicious call. Hey, let’s just call it water under the bridge; let’s try some delicious potato salad!” in an apparent attempt to bury the hatchet all within you. The stellar tang of fresh dill, sweet celery and pungent red onions that beckons you is always a flavorful way to troll yourself with a pop of flavors!!

Cakes and bakes: There’s a sweeter way to avenge

And it’s not always sugar’s fault. Indulge in those beer and wine blended cupcakes or stuff yourself with custard filled tarts, take a trip to a bar to create your own unique combination of frosties or rush out to your vacations with pies that could travel in a jar!; you just couldn’t blame that little bright crystals of sweetness, each time you couldn’t pull off your revenge! Try passing on a sweet revenge on someone else then.

People say bizarrely mean things that could make anybody go really mad. And if you happen to be the fuming victim, it’s time for some of these so-called trolls to get a taste of their own medicine. So how does it work? Begin by tracking down the physical location of the offensive person via the IP address. Whip up a retaliatory mini cake with said comment decorated in icing or edible letters. Box it and send to the person who wrote the vile comment, with a copy of the comment taped to the inside of the box. Trust me, nothing feels better to identify the tweet that spoke ill of you and tried to trump you as being the most insane person and then slam it in your own unique way. It’s heartwarming to name and shame the guilty. The shaming mini-cake in fact works almost like having a little parachute of sanity. Your greatest satisfaction will be just how weirdly awkward and embarrassing it gets for the wrong-doer. It works in no less the same way as a sweet savory recipe!

Still not convinced!! If you cannot avenge then take revenge on yourself. Pretty Italian cakes for instance make for a delicious revenge diet. Try cassata—a traditional Sicilian cake that uses sponge cake, sweetened ricotta, chocolate bits and candied fruit draped with a bright green marzipan fondant. The taste however is rather acquired and could leave you crest fallen, hungry and utterly dismayed. Pared-down version that blends all the familiar flavors—ricotta, dark chocolate, pound cake, almond liqueur and candied orange, is a better choice though. Then you are welcome to try horde of other delights. From moist dark chocolate cakes with layers of buttercream icing to tarts with vanilla layers soaked in sour cream, coconut syrup and whipped icing all wrapped in fresh coconut; these devil foods are atrociously tasty and await to incriminate you.

Pico de gallo

Image source: ‘Pico De Gallo Salsa Recipe’ by Teri Gilson in foodmeanderings.com on Ap. 28, 2021.

Pico de gallo or salsa fresca or salsa cruda, is a typical Mexican cuisine. Traditionally made from chopped tomato, onion, and serrano peppers, with salt, lime juice, and cilantro, Pico de gallo is used in much the same way as other Mexican liquid salsas.

Traditionally made with in-season, ripe, juicy tomatoes, if you wish to draw the strings harder for your sins, pull it together using hard, flavorless “winter whites,” you’re just asking for a bland, lackluster salsa. And this is one dish nobody would ever wish on his or her worst enemies…or is it? Call it food regret, food challenge or food jealousy, vengeance is always more satisfying when exacted in an unexpected way at an unexpected time. Wish you some luck!

Sushi

Image source: ‘Top 5 Places for Sushi on International Sushi Day in Kolkata’ by Madhushree Basu Roy in eazydiner.com on Jun. 18, 2019.

Elegant arrangement, enhanced simplicity and ethereal beauty is what turns Sushi into a work of genius. The preparation, shape, presentation and taste though somewhat differs from place to place representing tradition and characteristics so inherent to the locality. What more, the drama unfolds right before your eyes by the chef, and the enchantment that follows is simply irresistible. Traditionally sushi was prepared as pickled fish preserved in vinegar but nowadays it contains rice and is prep with sushi vinegar served with a white radish thinly peeled to a sheet like thingy and then julienned into fine strips. Few restaurants prefer to serve string Daikon (white radish) sans its spicy tangy taste.

Is it rude? How could you possibly draw blood for your offence if it’s none other than you? And especially when you don’t want to eat rushing with other things! My advice? Don’t feel offended, dine out alone and make sure that sushi is served with chili- all cold. Weird combo of food would simply overpower your sushi rush and might just as well ruin the evening for food being wildly off-theme. What a crass way to avenge yourself! You eat a lot or you simply couldn’t. Just one of the few things I can think of!

Let happiness find you!

I have never really understood what is meant by saying ‘Revenge is a dish best served cold. Does it mean trying gazpacho? – a tomato soup that everyone likes hot, but is served chilled on purpose, to be a huge disappointment and a rude shocker; especially if you think you are a sensitive-toothed person.

And what about Revenge being sweet’? Is it a revenge-gazpacho that needs sugar and the tomatoes are unripe – but just a pinch. Maybe revenge should never be themed desserty; it’s confusing enough dish as it is. And finally there’s that saying, “Revenge is a kind of wild justice”, Uh-Oh! No food-references here! But you might try some cured salty pork and plate it as a hearty, chilled, salty refreshing revenge-gazpacho. That’s just perfect for your pay back moments. Of course, there are ways to turn your food into a good healthy diet that will bounce you back to freedom and lose weight happily! What do you care, if your revenge diet reeks of rebounds of sorts!

So sit back quietly, eat well, grieve if you must and carry on with losing flabs!!

If only your pie could talk! :10 untold sob stories of best loved desserts that you missed.

When it comes to sweets, who would ever say never to those fleeting spikes of pleasure! But ever wondered how guilty, bittersweet or elusive their past has been? From frosted pies to sweet buns to cakes to Pop tarts, they all are winners and each one of them has an intriguing story to tell. It’s time we heard them. Like an impossible love affair let’s try and make the future of cheat food truly free and fair!!  

Imagine this. You drop by your neighborhood pâtisserie and decide to pick up one of those non-descript sweets that you have read so much about; but have not tried so far.

You decide on the right one and reach out to pick it up… and it screams!!

What the hell?!

That pud is talking, you are taken aback! No correct, screaming!!

Ok, so now you are getting a little panicky. What’s happening here? What’s going on with this dish?

Not for a moment would you believe that a future is in the making where the food is empowered to talk back and tell us everything about itself? Not yet! Not sure for now, but give or take another ten years down the line, your favorite food might mimic a ‘block chain’-adifficult to follow chain without any trail”, thanks to digital identity technologies sailing high these days. Everything will have an end-to-end encrypted log and our everyday pud will be able to tell us the full story of its existence!

Think of a future when we make a pick of dessert, scan a QR code and see the story of its life, and everything that owns a part of its story. Could you believe that trust apart, the power will be all ours to vote with our wallet in this moment!

This is when our food will ask us to listen, wanting us to trust what it has to say!  Sounds weird doesn’t it? But if and when this happens the stories we get told, might become the truth and the narrative a reality.

Truly free and fair: The ‘run clean’ truth

Ever wondered, why bakes especially cakes are synonymous with birthdays? Why stubs of wax standing deep down in the frosting of a sticky sweet chocolate cake, wink at you when lighted, to blow them and make a wish before eating the poor-me with a gusto? Funny but intense; the secret lives of goodies at your table leaves so much to explore! So, let’s begin by unearthing unheard of amazing life stories of 10 classic desserts that may have lost relevance over the time to more modern, processed favorites like Oreos and Pop tarts, yet remain as stunning and awesome as ever.

German Chocolate Cake

 “No, it is not named after the country Germany. With key ingredients like sweet baking chocolate, coconut, and pecans , this out of box cake drew its name from an American- Sam German (1802-88)-who first came up with a mild dark baking chocolate bar for Baker’s Chocolate Company in 1852. The company chose to honor him by naming the chocolate after him– “Baker’s German’s Sweet Chocolate.” The possessive form slowly faded away over the years, leaving behind the name German Chocolate Cake that we know of today.

A stupendous hit ever since it came into being, this cake filled and topped with coconut pecan frosting, stayed unapologetically decadent and indulgent for the larger part of 20th century but today this  not–so-German chocolate cake seems to have lost all charm and sweetness, and offers not much but texture to the cake. In fact, without the cream cheese frosting that tops it, it might actually taste quite bland to few. The texture is quite similar to coconut and renders the cake a German vibe. That apart, this cake’s appeal is nothing much to write home about!!

Revenge Cookie (Neiman Marcus cookie)

It’s unlikely that you haven’t heard that funny story about the woman lunching at the Neiman Marcus Café in Dallas, who loved the cookies so much that she asked for the recipe. For “only two-fifty” and the bargain was settled; but when the bill arrived, to her dismay she found out that she was being charged $250 for the recipe. The outraged woman and the story of enduring myth that followed, famed Neiman Marcus cookies as a delicious variation of chocolate chips confection.

The blended oatmeal in the dough is what gives these famous cookies the kind of tender, chewy, chocolaty texture and body that thrills every palate. Homemade and full of chocolate chips and nuts, this knockout bake is a guaranteed crowd-pleaser any time of day.  Add some more chocolate from a grated Hershey bar and you could woo even the most unrepentant naysayers to taste it.

The cookie story in fact, serves beyond a typical chocolate chip confection recipe. And it’s not difficult to know why!  The state of outrage of this woman had decided that no one was ever going to pay for this recipe again and it was shared in no less than a chain letter style. Fast forward! This bake story lately came to be reimagined and reinterpreted as ‘Revenge cookie tale’. Some even called it Urban Legend cookie!

So much for the story, but it left in its wake equally delicious and mouthwatering trail of Neiman Marcus cookies.

‘Gosh’! It did make a good story.

Jalebi

From ‘Zulbiya’ of ancient Persia to Bengal’s omnipresent ‘Jilapi’ the luscious swirls of this Indian dessert– Jalebi has travelled a full circle!

Try it on a frosty, finger numbing cold winter morning. A hurried walk to the nearest sweet shop, all trussed up in woollens, an impatient wait in the queue and finally you get to sink your teeth in a platter full of hot, swirled, deep fried sugary goodness, topped with that heavenly rabri (sweet, condensed-milk-based dish). Your soul sighs in contentment!

Already going gaga over this unrivalled dish! And why shouldn’t you? It has never failed to stir up an obsessed enthusiast in you. Eat it just plain after a humble breakfast or evening snack of Samosa and Chai combo, in milk or with curd, hot or cold, this syrupy yeasty batter is a delightful end to your meal; any time, every time.

But there is a dark side to this recipe too! This may shock you a bit, but Jalebi never originated in India. In fact, the one that has turned into a national craze and is a foodie-favorite elsewhere, is an evolved version of Middle Eastern ‘Zalabiya’ or the Persian ‘Zulbiya’ of the early 10th century. Finding mention in ‘Kitab al-Tabeekh’ a Persian cook book by Muhammad bin Hasan al-Baghdadi, the recipe also found space in another 10th century cookbook Kitab al-Ṭabīḫ, penned by Ibn Sayyaf al-Warraq- an Arab cook book compiler and author from Baghdad.

Popular in Iran even to this day, Zulbiya unlike Jalebi has an asymmetric floral coil pattern and mandates the syrup of honey and rose water instead of simple cardamom flavored sugar syrup.

Brought into the Indian subcontinent by the Persian traders and invaders alike throughout the medieval period, the shipped-in Zulbiya didn’t take long to weave itself into the traditional Indian cuisine like never ever. Today this syrup sweetness has invaded every menu. From road side eatery to country side fair to upscale restaurants this delightful cheat food leaves everyone ecstatic, indulgent and stoked with joy- always!

From heavy weight Jaleba of night markets of Madhya Pradesh and Chhanar Jilipi’ of Bengali kitchens to ‘Khoya Jalebi’ of Hyderabad to Jahangiri’ of Andhra Pradesh; call what is what; the lip smacking flavors from a hot, sweet, dripping Jalebi will never let you have enough. Allow yourself to burn for a while and this could be one more oomph on your table!

Rasgulla

To those who argue if Bengal has contributed to this country anything other than Nobel laureate Rabindranath Tagore, spark to Indian nationalism and Well Spring Pharmaceutical Corporation (makers of Gelusil antacid), they must not forget that it is the Bengal that touched India with soft, pearly white balls of cheese, dipped in flavored sugar syrup that has endured a top pick frenzy ever since.

Just as much few claim foreign origin for Marx, some stand up for an extra Bengali source for the making of rasgulla. No beans spilled! But it stays; no reference to cheese is found in India till the end of 17th century. So how could the Bengal ever lay its hand on cheese?

After Vasco Da Gama ‘discovered’ India in 1498 via a route that the Arabs had in use for at least two millennia before him, it was not long after, that the Iberians had claimed the entire Indian coast stretching from Chittagong in Bengal to Bombay in Marathwada.

And it were the Portuguese that ended up introducing three different acid-curdled cheese to Bengal. One was obviously Chhana (milk split with citric acid). The other one was the more smoky ‘Bandel Cheese’; an all-time British favorite, and the last but not the least was more like a hardened ‘feta’ (a Greek brined curd white cheese made from sheep’s milk or from a mixture of sheep and goat’s milk) that could never take off or make big because of its tangy, salty and sharp flavors. Nowadays found only in Dhaka, it is fondly remembered asDhakai Paneer’.

Chhana subsequently spread to rest of India, where it was compressed into blocks and given the Persian name for cheese’ Paneer’; a name that even the Turkish had borrowed from elsewhere! The heavenly blend of milk solids and sugar that enraptures us today as ‘Rasgulla, owes its honeyed grace to an even more sugary soul from Bengal-Nobin Chandra Das. Few still argue over the brains behind the business and claim otherwise. Rude and shocking! But whatever the controversy; if he didn’t invent it in the first place, at least it was him who tweaked it, took it to the market and finally to your plate as an out of the box sweet.

To this day, this chhana ball boiled in sugar syrup that makes it spongier and gives it a longer shelf life, is unarguably one stellar pick of a dessert. Served cold makes it even more ravishing and overwhelming!

Baked Alaska

A cake that melts hearts and is a celebrations celebrity, baked Alaska usually ends up as a shared dessert in restaurant menus. This cake and ice cream dish enveloped in meringue and then brûléed on the outside, is an unlikely but wonderful outcome of the baking method that was conceived by an 18th century scientist Sir Benjamin Thompson whose way to prepare theOmelette Norwegge,” the treat’s name at the time, was later embraced by Charles Ranhofer, a Parisian chef working at Delmonico’s in New York.

This often ‘Go-dutch’ special dessert is said to have been invented to celebrate the US acquisition of Alaska in 1867. Carved out of velvety cake and tantalizing ice cream, topped with meringue and set on fire after adding Kirsch or liqueur, the tale, taste and drama of this classic cake is beyond a delicate acclaim!

Mud Pie

Rich, indulgent and gooey, this pie is made with flourless chocolate cake filling topped with whipped cream in a buttery chocolate crust, and looks and feels like the muddy banks of Mississippi river.  It is rumored that this delicate pie most likely originated in the U.S. State of Mississippi, hence the name. If anything said in ‘Our Fifty States’ is true, then the earliest confirmed mention of this legendary delicacy did come from Jenny Meyer, a waitress in Vicksburg, Mississippi. The melting frozen pie created by the Chef Percy Tolliver reminisced her of Mississippi mud that followed the great floods of 1927. Her remarks paved the way for christening this heavenly dish of Graham cracker crust, fudgey chocolate sauce, chocolate pudding, chocolate whipped cream and fluffy whipped cream; Baked Alaska! All in a sensational awesome blend of flavors, this recipe cares little or none for the waistlines. The gooey chocolate sauce sitting atop a crumbly chocolate crust and served with ice cream, ever screams indulgence and never has any mercy for potbellies!

With more than a dozen recipe variations, this pie nowadays comes with an Oreo cracker crust, a layer or three of chocolate pudding and a creamy topping of whipped cream, marshmallow fluff, or meringue. Honestly, I don’t think if it could get any better than this!

Doughnuts

“Who made the doughnut with the hole in the middle? Just how it got there will be always a riddle.” Guess why Cindy Hutchins – a celebrity singer of 20’s sounded so true to the convoluted past of the humble doughnut! The origin lay right there in the name, but was so easy to miss.

It is true that this meek recipe with a weird past, involved Dutch immigrants, Russian exiles, and French bakers and who else; celebs like Irving Berlin and Clark Gable!

Seemingly typical American in origin, doughnuts have been around so long that even the archaeologists have been prompted to rummage the history of Native American settlements. Fast forward to mid-19th century and you may come across Elizabeth Gregory, mother of New England ship’s captain Hanson Gregory, who dreamed of and created the first doughnut as a deep fried dough that used her son’s cargo of nutmeg and cinnamon and a bit of lemon rind. Some say she did this purposely so that her son and the crew could store the pastry for long voyages; one that would ward off scurvy and cold as well. She had put hazelnuts and walnuts in the center as an afterthought and in a literal-minded way called them doughnuts.

Few argue that it were the Dutch settlers who brought the olykoeks or “oily cakes”—to New Amsterdam or New York City of today sometimes in the 1800s. But few also credited Hanson Gregory, the captain for jabbing a hole in the middle of the pastry that created the first ever real doughnut meeting the ‘mortal eyes’. Cynics think otherwise and maintain that he did this to stint on ingredients or maybe he thought that the hole made it lot easier to digest!

You would agree that less is always more, but doughnut didn’t come to fore until World War I, when it was first fed to the French trenches in million. War over, and back home the natural yen for doughnuts invaded the supermarkets and home kitchens alike. But it was not until 1920 that Adolph Levitt -a Russian refugee’s doughnut machine that signaled the arrival of doughnuts as a gainful trade. Till then it was merely a taste sensation and a public spectacle. And it’s not so difficult to know why!

For generations people had stood behind those glass windows transfixed to shiny conveyor belts and racks filled with fresh glazed doughnuts, often half swooning at the warmth and sweet vanilla richness of it all and learning in the process that the hole is made and not cut out.  There right before their eyes, the dough, shaped like a perfect smoke ring, jumped  off into a vat of boiling oil, got turned over to brown on the other side, and came out from the oil on a moving ramp, one by one like ducks in a row.

Wars worked like a powerful stimulant that pushed the doughnut consumption. From Doughnut Dollies (the Red Cross women volunteers)to Irving Berlin to Smithsonian’s; by late 1950s, everybody had romanticized the doughnuts into a frenzy. Nobody was minding eating his or her way through some anxious waiting moments! Consumption figures though drew the ire of nutritionists.

Generally deplored and not encouraged by the waist watchers, the 300 calorie batter, derided mainly for its sugar and fat contents, bemoans the unsaturated fats of the glazed delight. But neither the science nor the culinary geniuses scoff at it or cry-wolf to its utter addicts. The Krispy Kreme‘s hot “original glazed” doughnut safely adverted as “angelic” or even “sugar-coated air” remains a top pick cheat food to stay stoked and ecstatic to this day!

Lady Baltimore cake

A specialty and a favorite wedding cake, this mountainous white cake topped with a “Seven Minute Frosting “is what makes it so distinctive. The combination of chopped nuts and dried or candied fruits in its frosting make this cake very unique and render it complex flavors.

Image source: ‘Lavender Lady Baltimore cake for Evelyn’ by Jennifer Teismann in flickr.com on April 21, 2010,

Culinarians and critics are unable to find any recorded mention or recipe for the Lady Baltimore Cake except that it was in 1906 that it first appeared in newspaper articles. So, who actually invented or first made this cake is a matter of dispute. Some say that Owen Wister (1860-1938), a popular romance novelist had modeled the central character Lady Baltimore-after one of the city’s former belles, Alicia Rhett Mayberry in his story line.  In the novel, Lady Baltimore created a cake also called “Lady Baltimore.” It is rumored that Wister’s description of the cake sent readers of his novel scrambling to find a recipe that was yet to be created.

Few chroniclers claim that it were the Florence and Nina Ottelengui, the longtime managers of  Charleston’s Lady Baltimore Tea Room for a quarter of a century, who had created a cake toward the end of the 19th century which was somewhat akin to common “Queen Cake” of that period.

And if Janet Clarkson of ‘The Old Foodie’ blog is to be believed, the first recipe surfaced in December 24th 1906 edition of the Daily Gazette and Bulletin newspaper of Williamsport, Pennsylvania. This classic delight created with white cake layers and a fruity and toasted nut filling of figs, raisins, pecans or walnuts and crowned with boiled marshmallow icing turns out as a much lauded southern belle cake of the early 20th century. Of course, the Lady Baltimore cake apparently had nothing to do with the city of Baltimore or a lady for that matter. From most accounts, its origin is a teaser.

Delicate and light in texture, this pillowy white cake enhanced by the syrupy sweetness of dates and raisins, is an anytime ethereal finish to your meal!

Lemon chiffon cake

Light and airy-thanks to the many beaten egg whites that are folded into the batter-the chiffon cake was invented by a Californian insurance agent turned caterer Harry Baker. Lighter than a buttery pound cake and moister than a sponge cake, the cake was an absolute hit overnight, but the recipe could gain some acceptance some 20 years later, only after it was sold to General Mills. A closely guarded recipe, the cake in the meantime kept on doing rounds in the Hollywood feasts and probably for Brown Derby in L.A.

Fast forward to 1947! once the beans got spilled, Betty Crocker shared it as a signature dessert in a pamphlet in 1948 along with 14 recipes and variations to it. Rest is just history!

Image source: ‘Lemon Chiffon Cake’ by Foodie Photography in foodiephotography.photoshelter.com.

Lower in saturated fat than most butter cakes, the light texture of the lemon chiffon cake comes primarily from beaten egg whites, which are folded into the batter and give it a high rise similar to that of an angel food cake. Tall with an airy, even crumb that promises every bite to be light and fluffy, this cake may not have multiple layers or snowy frosting, but never falls short as a crowd –pleaser either! Blissfully overwhelming and always a top pick, the cake is an inescapable addition to your repertoire for cake-bakes!

Chess pie

The name sounds a bit weird! But this pie certainly has nothing to do with the game of chess. Unlike the heady game, this pie is a simple but magical blend of butter, lots of sugar, milk, cornmeal, eggs and a dash of vinegar.

Little is known about its origin but most believe that the recipe descended from early English settlers in the Virginia colony. A recipe similar to it is found in the cook book by Martha Washington from mid-18th century. Few however disagree and claim that this could be a deviation of ‘cheese pie’ that is similar in texture to British cheesecake and lemon curd. Yet another belief is that it was named after the town of Chester, England or perhaps it drew its label after the pie chest’– a piece of furniture prior to advent of freezers in which the pies could be stored.

Plenty of guesses and a bit of folklore, but the origin of the name chess pie to this day is uncertain. The close one is, that since it resembled much to the English lemon curd pie, ‘chess ‘might have been a more ‘Americanized’ inflection of the word “cheese,” which basically meant curd pie.

A cheese-less cheesecake with variations ranging from lemon to chocolate to buttermilk and nuts to Coconut and orange; this exalted recipe has time travelled from the period when pecans and other nuts were hard to come by and a sugar pie merely meant combining eggs, sugar, flour or cornmeal and butter. With unrivalled storage qualities, this pie was one dessert that was crazily endeared even by the queens and bishops and knights alike.

To this day, this pantry staple classic made out of basic pantry ingredients is an up-the-sleeve surprise serve to friends and family alike!

Perhaps this all is a bit crazy or a little dreamy, but if sweet buns and cakes and those frosted pies could talk — tell us their real story — well, let’s just say, who wouldn’t want to listen? They may not be screaming yet but their story is screaming out to be told. So when they do talk someday, let’s listen…

Or at least, may be marvel at their awesome tale for now!

Even as more, stranger-than -fiction sobfest stories await to be heard!!

15 potluck worthy dream desserts that will make you quit calorie counting!

From warm, moist and cinnamon flavored waffles topped with Nutella or Belgian pearl sugar to soft and spongy, melt in the mouth gulab jamun… is there anything better?

Like everybody else, a warm lazy day to me means hanging out and lots of outdoor eating. Guess I might find it easy to throw in a few sandwiches together or fire up the grill or dream of juicy BBQ meats and grilled veggies at tabletop spreads, but like everybody says, the best part of a meal comes at the end!

This is when the sweet tooth begins to throb! It’s time to break out tubs of chilly homemade ice cream or indulgent cakes layered with fresh seasonal fruit!  But more lip smacking options are equally tempting!!! From delicious green tomato pie and flavorful strawberry shortcakes that would look gorgeous on any table, to an icebox cake, a fruit-filled pie or even jello with toppings of fresh fruits like strawberries, cherries and peaches, all would seemingly make any backyard BBQ feel timeless. Abundance of choice is bewildering.

A classic comfort food always brings a delicious end to every meal. If you ever get stuck up with options for something sugary yet healthy, don’t despair! There are several taste easy and quick desserts to slake your sugar rush. Cool, innovative and plumb delightful, these fat-easy guilt free cakes, shakes, ice-creams, sorbet or waffles are so utterly delicious that you wouldn’t even know they were healthy if not told!

But should you be quitting calorie tracking before indulging? Is sugary binge so frightening after all? We all know it’s not sustainable long term but for waist watchers every bite matters! Let’s find out if this food freedom talk is anything but a weary prop!

If only you could ace binging: Easy and healthy!!

How would you know if your occasional overindulgence is not a serious binging issue? It’s likely that you may find isolated runs as normal but binge eating is something that needs to be watched over. More than food, it’s your changing mindset that could make you ditch your diet plans.

Of course, all of us are mindful enough to listen to our bodies and recognize when it is enough. Keep tabs though. It helps; but everything about it is simply exhausting. Stop or miss it even for a day and the scales become alive and threaten!

Eventually your ability to trust yourself turns punishing enough and would push you to eat much. This is when you need to stop. Don’t let counting calories turn into an obsession. Learn to live with yourself. Usually the weight that you eye or envy is always thinner than what your body wants to be. Besides, if you don’t binge with so many trigger foods around you and keep tracking calories, then it’s not worth it. It’s neither healthy for your body nor your mind. So, just let the fun happen. Life is just too short to miss it. 

And desserts are desserts!! It’s never over till you have sunk your teeth in some ‘Butter dainties’ or that timeless classic Tiramisu or a deliciously inventive and iconic Kheer, or that unforgettable fresh and thirst-quenching Lemon semifreddo.’ Social eating or not, these delectable summery treats would make anybody happy. You just cannot go wrong with these simple heavenly delights.

Tiramisu

Feature credits: ‘ Tiramisu Cake’ by Nino’s home in youtube.com on Oct.17, 2020.

Literally meaning “cheer me up” or “pull me up,” tiramisu is a timeless classic no-bake coffee flavored patisserie that has sponge cake ladyfingers soaked in coffee and liqueur and the mascarpone cream layer. Lady Fingers are essentially sponge cake batter piped into strips then baked and dried into biscuits. Also known as “savoiardi” these absorb the syrup well without getting soggy. Absolutely perfect for a dessert plate!

Mascarpone is essentially the Italian version of whipped cream cheese, stabilized with lemon juice or citric acid.  Smooth in consistency and mildly flavored, this cheese though has twice as much fat as cream cheese.

Blending the bold flavors of cocoa and espresso with savory mascarpone cheese and wine and layered with ladyfinger biscuits, this dessert is a lavish display of forgiving ingredients and unforgettable flavor combinations.

Try it for once and much the same way like English trifle, you may not wait for another time to dig in this treat again!

Blackberry cheesecake

Image source: ‘Vegan, No bake Blackberry Cheesecake’ by Eva in thehealthytart.com

Blackberry cheesecake is essentially a creamy vanilla cheesecake with a hint of lemon in it. With swirls of fresh blackberry sauce, it is baked on golden Oreo cookie crust. The baked cheesecake makes for a perfectly healthy dessert because of its star ingredient- the blackberry. Low on carbs, the sweet blackberry sauce topping paired with the rich cheesecake filling takes the flavors beyond delicious! Still looking for a twist!

Just swirl the luscious blackberry sauce and add crunch with a scattering of honeycomb. Or simply try with fresh blackberries and clotted cream.

There are so many versions of blackberry cheesecake. Crust comes topped with syrupy blackberries before filling is poured. Blackberries are baked right into the filling itself. A strained blackberry puree ‘is added to the filling to create a beautiful purple masterpiece.  Swirls of blackberry puree make lovely designs on the top of the cake and turns this treat irresistible.  Even the no-bake version with a crunchy biscuit base all covered in a delicate cheese cream and garnished with sweet and fresh blackberries will get you hooked to this delight. The ploy to keep you buried in this delight is simply awesome and thick!

 Lemon semifreddo

Image source: ‘Lemon and yogurt semi freddo’ in realfood.tesco.com.

If you’re looking for a fresh, thirst quenching dessert, this fragrant and delicate yet simple Italian inspired dessert is the perfect sweet treat for you.

Semifreddo is an Italian word meaning “half cold.” Light and airy with a texture of  mousse, this frozen layered terrine is an ideal dessert that is so easy to pull out, slice, and serve. Traditionally made by heating sugar to 248 degrees F. (this is when the sugar turns firm and flexible), then whisked into egg and finally folding the egg white mixture into whipped cream, semifreddo could also be made by using the French meringue method of simply whisking sugar into egg whites. Both inspire the same goodness.

Want to try something that comes with a twist! Light chewy meringue, crumbled into luscious whipped cream, lemon curd and Greek yogurt is a classic dish amongst the semi frozen desserts. Laced with a drizzle of honey and few fresh berries, this lush creamyhungry for more’ eat has an intensely lemony flavor and is super refreshing.

And don’t confuse it with ice cream. They are similar but different too! Ice cream is frozen first and then air is pushed in, whereas semifreddo is whisked first and then frozen which makes it feel like half frozen.

Matcha Green Tea Frozen Yogurt

It’s the frozen yogurt that shines better than ice cream and sorbet! The Matcha Green Tea Frozen Yogurt is stuffed with antioxidants and protein, made only with natural ingredients, is vegan and claims a modest 277 kcal for each serve (half cup). Packed with irresistible flavors, this exotic super food is a sure way to keep your days supercharged!

Matcha is the fine grounded tea leaves that speeds up your metabolism. The tea’s natural buzz makes this frozen dessert a natural energy booster. Heavy on green tea flavor, the vanilla vodka is optional if you want it to be soft and velvety. An awesome healthy alternative to ice-cream, you can devour it as flavored yoghurt too! Try honey vanilla flavored yogurt if you prefer mild.

Gelato

Image source: ‘The Easiest Homemade Strawberry Gelato ‘ by Gemma Stafford in biggerbolderbaking.com on Jun. 11, 2020.

Walk around any upscale business district and you’re bound to pass faces buried deep in creamy, frozen desserts, unaware that when it comes to eating healthy, it’s better to skip dessert or may be reserve a slice of Banana Split for cheat days. But probably everybody seems to have found out which dessert works best for them. Lower calorie ice creams and frozen yogurt treats like gelato have run rogue and are hot favorites now.

Although it is difficult to tell the difference from a distance, both ice cream and it’s more densely flavored cousin- Gelato, are quite distinct. Made with a base of 3.25% whole milk and sugar, gelato has fewer calories, less sugar and lower fat content per serving than ice cream. A typical 3.5 oz. serving of vanilla gelato contains 90 calories and 3 grams of fat, compared to 125 calories and 7 grams of fat in vanilla ice cream. Much silkier and less denser than ice cream, gelato comes in an array of flavors that include raspberry, pistachio, rum, and chocolate usually packing flavors from natural sources.

So, should you be breaking out your spoons now? Not so fast! gelato has a much lower fat content of around 4–9% but packs more sugar than ice cream  and often use of  real fruit or fruit juice increases the carbs . Since it is a fairly dense, calories stack up fast. Be wary! portion control is a must if you’re on a crash diet and yet want to dig in! Low fat ice cream could soothe your cravings but if you are a fan of flavors, a small serve of gelato is just great. It won’t wreck your diet plans and Probiotics in yogurt will have some pay-offs for your health too.

Belgian waffle

Alone and have a sudden rush for dessert!  Try Belgian waffle or better still a Nutella waffle. This deep pocket sugary treat is simply delicious!! Coming straight out of Belgian street food fame books, this buttery treat tastes best when eaten warm and topped with powdered sugar or Nutella.  Crispy on the outside and fluffy on the inside, Belgian waffles are reckoned a brunch superstar.  Cooked in a hot griddle with a grid pattern, the original Belgian version has bigger and deeper pockets than the regular ones which are a wee bit smaller in size. Sometimes the only difference between different types of waffles is the number of squares pressed. Light and fluffy, the authentic Liege waffles are made with dough and include bits of caramelized Belgian pearl sugar. Try them with maple syrup or fruit and be shocked with a delicious tsunami of flavors.

Gulab Jamun

Image source: ‘Gulab Jamun Recipe’ by TNN in recipes.timesofindia.com on Jun.2, 2021.

While some of you might not want to change their lifestyle or say ‘Yes’ to clean eating fearing it would mean giving up your favorite foods; desserts make things even harder.

Saying goodbye to your favorite foods has never been so easy. And I have to say, it definitely is not a small compromise. Fortunately you need not always be into fray to eat healthy. All you should do is opt for real, whole ingredients and adjust your favorite portions a little bit not to go overboard. And this definitely applies to desserts that quickly add up the calories. But then there are a few exceptions that are deliciously healthified.

Soft and spongy, gulab jamun is one such melt in the mouth desert made from milk solids that are reduced to the consistency of soft dough. Shaped into small balls, fried and then dunked in delicately flavored sugar syrup mixed with cardamom and rose water, it is a lip smacking insight to flavors of traditional Indian desserts, every time you dig in. Be wary though of how much of it you can polish off. Flavors do not betray calories!

Garnished with nuts such as almonds and served hot, each ball of gulab jamun contains about 125 calories. Of this carbs are 90 calories, proteins about 9 and remaining 25 calories come from fat. In fact each serve of 2 pieces provides about 6 % of daily calorie requirement of a standard adult diet of 2000 calories. So watch out for this silky sweet  dessert before it makes a kill of your diet plan !!

Lamington

Image source: ‘Lamington Cake’ by Kristina Vanni in thespruceeats.com on Sep.29, 2020.

An ode to classic Aussie cooking, these dessert squares consist of butter cake or yellow sponge cake coated in chocolate sauce and then rolled into coconut flakes. The thin mixture when absorbed into the outside of the sponge cake and left to set, gives the dessert a distinctive texture. Cut into small squares, this white cake delicacy is dipped in a sweet chocolate frosting and then dunked in dried coconut flakes. It would often remind you of a chocolate and coconut covered cake doughnut that has been crafted into a delightful masterpiece. Even its namesake Lord Lamington -Governor of Queensland from 1896 – 190l, would have been at his wits end had he foreseen how popular these dessert bites were to become.

Kheer (Indian rice pudding)

Image source: ‘Rice Kheer | Indian Rice Pudding (6 ingredients, gluten-free)’ in honeywahtscooking.com on Oct. 19, 2020.

The sweet and creamy cardamom scented Indian rice pudding often served as delicious side dish or dessert – hot or cold, owes its richness to a thick and creamy base of whole milk that has been reduced to half during the preparation of this decadent treat. 

Kheer, also called Rice payasam, is one peculiar dessert that traces back its history to many different cultures. Mexicans have Arroz con Leche, Lebanese call it Moghli, and the Greeks have come out with a similar dish, rizogalo. The English have their own version of this dish and call it porridge

So flavorful and yummy, the rice pudding first originated during Tudor period in United Kingdom with the recipe first documented in 1615. Variations over the period and regions however all agree on key ingredients rice, milk, cream, and sugar though differ in flavoring and techniques involved.

Rice pudding is at best one of the most underrated desserts. So, how it is made insanely irresistible? The secret is combining it with chia pudding, a staple that’s good for gut and is filled with healthy fats and proteins. Here it makes the rice pudding give you a stick-to-your-ribs satisfaction without being at all heavy. The mix of rose, pistachio, and cardamom add the rich yummy flavor combinations.

Fresh Pumpkin Ice Cream

Image source: ‘Pumpkin Ice Cream’ by Makinze Gore in delish.com on Sep. 11, 2019.

Whoever said low-calorie desserts are not as good as regular ones, has probably never tried fresh pumpkin ice cream. Full of warm pumpkin flavors and just the right amount of richness, this one could be your pick of a spot-on creamy, sweet and delicious dessert. It’s amazing how a cup of canned unsweetened pumpkin puree’ with all the toasty flavors of pumpkin pie in a chilly ice cream, could turn into a perfect fall themed clean-eating dessert with prep time of 15 minutes only.

Vegan, dairy-free, and gluten-free, this is the dream ice cream for all the pumpkin spice fans. With 158 kcal per serve (125 gms),  this ice cream needs little garnishing though a grating of cinnamon stick would make a smart gig and add a bit more of spicy oomph. Drizzle of pumpkin shake with milk, maple syrup and bourbon and toppings of warm butter-pecan sauce or candied pepitas (pumpkin seeds) add some zest to the dish. So dig into a scoop of pancakes or waffles topped with this mushy ice cream and swoon over a decadent brunch! 

Peach Ice Cream

Peach Ice Cream is one summertime classic after eat, that has so often bowled over even the most impassioned food critique. Rich, creamy and so luscious, the peaches make it take on a deeper, richer flavor and become even sweeter. Roasted and cooled down before being added to the mix makes it easier to eat pieces of peach in the ice cream.

Yet another variant has maple syrup blended in to deepen the flavor. This actually enhances the flavor of peaches without tasting like if maple syrup has been added to it. Coming together in a matter of minutes without spending a lot of time prepping it, this vegan, gluten free goes easy with the calories at 87 kcal per serve.

 Lemon Blueberry Sorbet

Image source: ‘Blueberry Sorbet’ by Elise Bauer in simplyrecipes.com on Feb. 10, 2021.

Try this super easy, low-sugar, and perfect Lemon Blueberry Sorbet to muzzle your sweet craving. A delightful treat with great fruity taste minus the extra calories and refined sugars, this blend of wild Maine blueberries, lemon juice, zest and water, turn the sorbet into a wrap up of refreshing, light, any time dessert for health freaks. If you want a dessert option with still lesser calories than 98 kcals standard, try the one with a drizzle of honey. Lemons on the other hand add a bit of tartness and complete the whole flavor profile.

And for all we know, blueberries do wonders to our health. So, all you need is to grab a spoon and dig in!

Raspberry Sorbet

Image source: ‘Raspberry Sorbet’ in bhg.com.

Raspberry sorbet is a great option when you crave for a dessert but have no appetite for processed sugars and fats in traditional desserts. Made with raw honey, raspberries, lemon juice and water, this sorbet is one light, refreshing frozen treat that makes for one of the best easy healthy dessert.

Raw honey for added sweetness or lemon juice for a little pop of flavor  add punch to this fruity upgraded version of a fruit snack. And using good, fresh raspberries full of pectin make all the difference! A great choice, this fruit makes for a yummy, creamy, and almost ice-cream like delightful sorbet. 

Chocolate Banana Ice Cream

Feature credits: ‘Healthy 3 Ingredient Chocolate Banana Ice Cream’ by The Endless Meal in youtube.com on July 07, 2018.

Do you ever want a sweet treat but couldn’t without feeling guilty about eating it? This chocolate banana ice cream is just what could be the right choice for you. When it comes to healthy dessert options, I don’t think it gets any easier than this chocolate banana ice cream. Outrageously flavorful, this in fact is not really an ice cream; it’s a faux ice cream. With 2 simple ingredients and 110 kcals for 2 serves (0.5 cup each), this ice cream is definitely a health dream. The consistency is very similar to ice cream but it doesn’t contain dairy or sugar. When ripe frozen bananas and cocoa powder are blitzed together until smooth, you get to taste a creamy, guilt-free, scrumptious frozen treat. Besides, it’s gluten-free and vegan!

Raspberry Lemon Chia Cheesecake

Feature credits: ‘Raspberry cheesecake’ by Thy Than in youtube.com on May 07, 2021.

Just because you are in a healthy lifestyle or a cleansing detox doesn’t mean that you have to let go the desserts form your daily eats. Merely be a little wiser in your choices and there is no dearth of ways to slake your sugar rush without harming your health goals.

Besides, the good news is that are a host of dessert options that are healthy. You might say that what is healthy need not necessarily be good in taste and healthy ones usually do not taste as good as the unhealthy ones. But for once, I beg to differ. A bite of this nutritious scrumptious cheesecake will make you think twice.

With a nut-date base, cashew and coconut milk filling and raspberry chia jam topping, this dessert is your perfect rescue for healthy eating. And need you be reminded of how chia does wonders to our health? Pick this dessert when you crave for something sweet and you are good to go. Trust me; you won’t get overdosed with sugar either!

Feature credits:’20 best desserts around the world’ by the crazy trips in youtube.com on Jun.20,2019.

While it’s amazing no matter where you have it, desserts differ from country to country. Some are light and fruity, some rich and chocolaty. From Japan’s mochi to Poland’s poppy seed rolls, each has the punch to muzzle any sweet tooth.

Let’s face it—sooner or later you too could be hit with that craving for something sweet.  So, take a moment here to wax some admiration for those simple healthy desserts where sugar does not make the overkill!

It may be difficult to find a perfect classic dessert for your fancied sweet blast, but these ones are pretty close. Few are though served drizzled with sugar, honey or maple syrup, often dunked in chocolate sauce or where even yogurt is rather set aflame with vanilla vodka. If you find them deep on calories, you might want to be careful to have your pick and get it served with a whirl.

Whatever…get your back with a few of these jaw dropping healthilicious desserts to slake your sugar rush and spare yourself a knock -over in Jacob’s feast!

15 classic Asian comfort foods for the summery days you crave takeouts.

Miss the bite of extravagance and you wouldn’t know the ultimate joy of filling up!!

Sometimes we all need delicious comfort food! Like when life gives you lemon, make lemonade. Or get some good comfort food! Or maybe both! Doesn’t it feel good to reach out to a yummy comforting meal after a long hard day and enjoy it? Perched up nice and cool in a refreshing restaurant or sitting cozy in your living room and enjoying food; doesn’t summery nights and delicious takeouts truly sum up the day with a punch of happiness?

Besides, there’s nothing that a hot plate of comfort food can’t solve. Unwell, going through a bad break, work stress or just plain bad day? The aroma of freshly cooked veggie crumbles and sweet and spicy glazed mango sriracha or BBQ-flavored vegan waffle and naturally sweetened wholegrain brownie, all just make problems vanish away.

The knock out version of Asian food is a burst of bold flavors!

No more copy cat recipes!! Fun filled Asian cuisine come with a twist each time you reach out to them and are all full of hot ideas and inundating choices. From delicious bite size pizzas to chocolate croissants, it’s hard to tell if theburger with the works is better than “Peanut BBQ sweet potato burger with avocado”. So, catch up with some iconic Asian dishes and discover if the Friends of Pho in Kolkata or Once upon a bite in Dubai and Senn Thai Comfort Food in New York city or Soul Food Mahanakorn in Watthana Bangkok could make you get hungry just looking at the photos and blow your senses over once eaten!

Though a cross kitchen between Tokyo and Texas or Shanghai and New Delhi is an obstinate possibility, upscale restaurants do treasure rundown menus from edgy cookbooks, full of diverse Asian comfort food recipes. There is Japanese-Peruvian cuisine; French patisserie, Mexican tacos, and many more crowd-pullers. From fancy take away beaneries to countless neighborhood stalls, all serve from spicy gravies, saucy noodles to legendary chicken or vegetable Manchurian and much more. With names as scrumptious as China Bowl, China Pearl, Chung Wahor Zhangs, these delights- usually batter fried and doused in chilli garlic sauce- are quintessentially soul satisfying comfort food that always come with a kick.

In Asian style cooking, simple elements like rice, noodles, fruits, and veggies are recast, blended with unique herbs and seasonings and reinvented into stunning dishes. From Japanese noodles to Chinese stir-fry to Indian naan, you just can’t run out of options for Asian-themed dines. So, spicing your weekday dinners and weekend pleasures with all things, here are the tastiest 15 such Asian comfort foods to instantly perk up your platter!

Asian Slaw

Crisp, colorful, and wildly delicious: the Asian slaw comes packed with bright vegetables laced with an insanely good sauce that would trump any other rival. Crammed with bright vegetables like shredded cabbage, carrots, edamame, bell peppers and peanuts and flavored with scallions and cilantro, this slaw comes with a dressing of a thick, sweet-savory spicy sauce and is a perfect medley of flavors and textures. Can you imagine all those elements in one bite?

Korean popcorn chicken

Image source: ‘ Korean Popcorn Chicken’ by Julie in tastemade.com.

If you are looking for a starter that’s all fire and flavor, try this tangy, sticky and crunchy chicken popcorn inspired by the much hyped Korean street food Dakgangjeong and trust me, you just won’t have enough of these crazy fireballs! Deep-fried boneless sticky and tangy, these chicken nuggets are bite-sized salvos that’s all set to get you rolling! Made from boneless chicken fillet, this full-of-crackling food gets a typical Korean zing once tossed with tangy and spicy seasoning. The dripping hot sauce further amps up the heat  and turns these super-crunchy balls into a fiery feast!

Chicken Noodle Soup

Image source: The Ultimate Chicken Noodle Soup’ in tasteofhome.com.

A truly work of art, this soup is a bowl of chewy noodles immersed in a steaming savory broth, topped with meats and veggies. An ultimate definition of classic Asian comfort food there couldn’t be a better way to spend a balmy evening than by having a bowl or two of chicken noodle soup.

Thai Noodle Soup

Image source: ‘ Spicy Thai Curry Noodle Soup’ innheathercristo.com.

If you’ve never had it before, you’re in for a cozy surprise! A delicate mix of rice noodles, crisp veggies, and nutty peanut sauce, this soup is an insanely good dish.  It is not only about noodles cabbage, carrots and bell peppers that unfold the magic. The wizardry lies in the sauce. Thick, perfectly sweet, spicy and wonderfully nutty, this sauce is an ultimate count in finger-licking good indulgence! Bites of tender chicken, bok choy, rice noodles, cilantro, basil, lime juice and flavors of curry and coconut make this dish a perfect must-try deal.

Wonton Soup

Image source: ‘Red curry chicken wonton soup’ by Tara in tarasmulticulturaltable.com on Sep.7, 2020.

Getting tire of buffalo wings? How about a bowl of steaming Wonton soup loaded with silky flavors of seasoned chicken broth with filled wantons to ward off your worries!! An Asian equivalent of ravioli or tortellini, wontons are dumplings made with ground meat wrapped in a dumpling wrapper and steamed until cooked and tender. Served with hot broth, just one spoonful can quickly turn that frown upside down. If you’ve never have had them before, now is the time!

Gado Gado

A traditional Indonesian salad of mildly boiled, blanched or steamed veggies like carrots, red cabbage and hard boiled eggs, fried tofu, tempeh and lontong (which is a dense rice cake  wrapped inside a banana leaf. Rice is rolled inside a banana leaf and boiled, then cut into small cakes as a replacement of steamed rice). Served along with a thick spicy nutty peanut sauce, the real tweak  happens when sweet potato is used in place of carrots and green beans are switched for red cabbage. Since the salad is rice-based, it’s hearty and a full meal on its own. Build mainly on cooked veggies and meatless proteins with toppings like prawn crackers, this food is a super quick way to satisfy your craving.

Volcano Fries

Topped with spicy mayo, green onion, and a bit of seaweed, volcano fries is a sensory overload one cannot resist. Served with a generous topping of gooey cheese, crispy chicken cubes and sauce, sprinkled with Cheetos (cheese puff snack) – it’s a dish your nutritionist may frown upon, but trust me, every bite is a journey to heaven and back. With toppings of kani (crab meat) and seaweed salad, scallions, sriracha (fermented hot sauce) and Japanese mayo, the dish turns fiercer but you just shouldn’t get yourself cut loose without trying this one most indulgent food.

Crispy tofu broccoli stir fry

Feature credits: ‘Crispy tofu broccoli stir fry’ in myfoodstory.com on Nov. 16, 2020.

This 20 minutes stir fry dish is the perfect mix of protein and vegetables. Try it with quinoa when you want something light or with noodles if you want something hearty! Stir fried crispy tofu and fresh veggies like broccoli and spinach sautéed in a quick and easy garlic sesame sauce, give this dish all the markings of an easy and healthy food that you can turn to again and again. With firm and flavorful tofu, fresh and colorful veggies all drenched in just enough sauce to coat the tofu and broccoli so that crunchiness stays intact; this salty savory dish is one comfort food that you can always tag to your bucket list!

Vegan Cheesesteak sandwich

This vegan sandwich with mushrooms smothered in gooey cheese sauce creates a whole food that brings you a great taste, some protein and a great texture; all in 20 minutes. A low-calorie, easy to make mushroom cheesesteak sandwich is all you need when your sandwich craving hits the ceiling. Mimicking the meat base, slices of Portobello mushroom sautéed with a thicket of peppers and onions, then tucked into a toasted roll and drenched with a bit of melted provolone, mark it as a great vegetarian dish that wouldn’t decimate your diet plan. Eat this for seven days a week and you could still end up thinner than when you started. What more, you don’t even have to be a vegetarian to enjoy it!

Scallion Pancake

Feature credits: ‘kitchenstories.com.

Crisp on the outside, fluffy on the inside and wonderfully savory all over, scallion pancakes are a popular food that has a crispy, flaky texture and is a new twist on regular pancakes. Made out of an unleavened flatbread and stuffed with scallions or green onions or spring onions, cilantro and sesame, these pancakes are truly addictive. Crispy, flaky, and with the *slightest* bit of chew, when served with a hot and spicy dipping soy sauce, it’s easy to polish off a whole plate of this treat in no time. 

Biryani

Celebrating or just lazing! With over 50 different varieties, biryani  is one superfood that has never let anybody down. The combination of meat, rice and spices is unmatched and unparallel.  Long-grained rice flavored with fragrant spices such as saffron and layered with lamb, chicken, fish, or vegetables and thick gravy is then slow cooked in a Deg (special cookware) with lid secured with dough, preferably on a wooden stove to blend smoky flavors. It’s wholesome and starkly distinct from other fancy gourmet dishes. But what you can be sure of is that each variant is delicious in its own way. So, next time when you’re craving for fancy meals, just go for it. Having a taste of this comfort food will tell a story beyond words can. This stuff is seriously addictive!

Nasi Goreng

Traditionally served on banana leaves, this Indonesian street food is an easy and convenient way to truly satisfy and warm up your soul. With extra cooked rice stir fried with meat and addons like shallot, dark soy sauce and fragrant spices, make it a munchies delight. The real hit of flavour comes from the sambal sauce which is made by cooking garlic, shallots, chilies and shrimp paste in oil and then hand-grinding them to a fragrant and aromatic paste. Crushed anchovies and sugar then pitch in to create a delicious balance of salt and sweet. It’s a perfect take out call if you want to experience other people’s out of the ordinary comfort food.

Feature credits: ‘How To Make Nasi Goreng At Home’ by Banglar Rannaghor in Youtube.com on Nov. 6, 2020.

Teriyaki chicken

Image source: ‘ Chicken Teriyaki’ by Lena Abraham in delish.com on Jun.3,2021.

An awesome 30 minute recipe, this dish is here to change the way you fancy quick meals! Juicy tender pieces of chicken glazed in sweet and savory teriyaki sauce and served with steamed rice and assorted vegetables make up for a complete meal, one that you need to eat to experience the unparallel satisfaction. When sake and mirin are switched in the traditional teriyaki sauce for rice vinegar, toasted sesame oil and ginger, an iconic food is all set for you to catch up and make yourself a happy person.

Cashew chicken noodles

Image source: ’15-minute chicken, broccoli and cashew stir-fry’ by Emma Braz in taste.com.au.

Loaded with broccoli, bell peppers, zucchini, cashews and crispy chicken, this is an unmistakable call on your takeout. Simple, flavorful and delicious, one bowl of cashew chicken noodles is the perfect 30 minute fix for your take-out cravings. With crispy bits of chicken and noodles tossed in a super flavorful, spicy sauce and topped off with roasted cashews, this is just the kind of meal for you when you are hungry and in the mood for something out of ordinary.

Then there is nothing better than a sugary treat to finish off the meal, for your belly might be on fire for it. Here is one genius of a dessert that the world has just begun to catch up and once you try it you’d know why everybody calls it a super dessert.

Kulfi  Falooda

Feature credits: Hebbars Kitchen in Youtube.com on Mar.8, 2021.

Seriously for me, kulfi over ice cream- any day! Creamy kulfi is one delicious dessert that will leave you wanting for more. Made with simple ingredients, this eggless cardamom flavored, nutty and super creamy ice cream also has other variants such as saffron, mango, rose, pistachio, almond, orange and strawberry. It is usually made by slow boiling of milk till it reduces considerably and  then sweetened, flavored and frozen in small earthen pot molds known an “Matki“. It’s most uncommon to find this delight served in scoops like ice cream. Thickening agents like corn starch or bread crumbs give it still more creamier consistency. Served with brightly colored moist falooda (vermicelli noodles made from starch) and rose syrup, this sweet, icy cold, crunchy rich delicious dessert is here to enslave you and will soon become your go-to-kulfi dessert every time you get ready for a perfect comfort food.

From Momos to Chicken lollipops to spicy Papadams! From hot and sour soups, fiery Korean popcorn bites, crispy and tangy stir fries to gorgeous teriyaki chicken, the love for good food is universal. Mouth watering sauces, spicy schezwan magic, flavorful Asian noodles and no fuss crispy vegetarian food, the list of incredible Asian vegetarian bites has everything.

It’s time you gave your takeouts an Asian twist and experience the  flavors that will knock your socks off!!

What the heck! 15 Off-the-chart street desserts are here to wrap up your meals with a bash!!

“Life is uncertain.  Eat dessert first”.-Ernestine Ulmer

Image source: ‘Best desserts in London’ in visitlondon.com.

When you talk about street food you could just think of the main course alone; all from gourmet burgers, wood-fired pizza, fish tacos. However, street food is lot more than this. There is a whole range of delicious street food desserts on offer, to satisfy your sweet tooth. Old classics such as ice cream still rule, but there are some epic desserts that could enslave you like never before!

Much more unique than a typical wedding cake, street desserts are delectable, made all fresh, are healthy and take you on one helluva of culinary journey. From cookies, muffins, brownies, granola, cakes and come summer, delicious, sugar-free, gluten-free mango cakes, puddings and tartlets filled with healthier ingredients like almond flour, coconut flour, nuts and seeds- these show stoppers top the menu chart across small restaurants and street side eateries. If you ever feel the need to treat yourself without having to worry about which way your belly button goes, just dig into the unsung flavors of street side desserts! The chocolate sorbet on the road side could be just as delicious, super rich yet completely sugar free and vegan. And what of orange sponge cake with dark chocolate mousse or low calorie cheesecake with nutty crust! Delicious and sugar free, full of aromatic spices, topped with pistachios or soaked in rose syrup, there are plenty of insanely good delights  that could become your best snap eats if you are good at exploring flavors.

So, if you are looking for some dessert ideas and want something different than the usual, here are 15 incredible lip-smackingly good healthy street desserts that dig small in the pocket and definitely are not a diet disaster. Just be ready to get blown away by the blasts of flavors.

Mango sticky rice

In this popular street food dessert, sweetened coconut milk flavors the sticky rice, which is then served with fresh mango; a refreshing take on the traditional Thai treat. Mango toppings on the rice, drenched with delicately salted coconut sauce and a sprinkle of sesame seeds, this addictive Thai dessert is a unique twist to enjoy fresh mangoes.  When served with some more of coconut ice-cream, it adds to that extra indulgence. Try this gluten-free, vegetarian, and vegan love-at-first-bite kind of easy peasy ripe mango dessert on any occasion! If you haven’t done so far and anyone tells you its awesome, you can certainly believe them!  

Thai roti

Image source: ‘Thai Banana Pancakes (Banana Roti)’ by Pailin Chongchitnant in hot-thai-kitchen.com on Nov. 30, 2018.

Thai roti or pancake is similar to a crepe and is highly addictive.  Paper thin, crunchy, crispy and topped with sweetened condensed milk and sugar, Thai rotis are a foodie’s every time delight. The combination of crispiness, sweetness and saltiness is enchanting. But the evolution doesn’t stop just at crispy frying, though it is a bit intimidating to stretch and cook such a thin flatbread and then griddle fry it. Quite forgiving in calories, its variant includes Nutella or jam filling, fresh fruit, cheese or even pizza toppings. The trick is to get the bread as thin as possible, which when fried and served with banana, chocolate sauce or condensed coconut milk and a sprinkle of cinnamon, turns this flaky street treat crazy enough to disarm you.

Egg Waffle

Egg waffle, sometimes called egg puff, eggette or bubble waffle, is a popular delicacy that is visually puffy with a pullapart texture. Made out of egg white and yolk, milk, butter, sugar, flour and salt, this tiny treat is made in special pans with small, round cell. The end result is a waffle with crisp edges and soft oval “eggs” or “bubbles” which can be easily broken off for snacking. Devoured plain or paired with fruit and different spreads, this seemingly unexceptional cheap street food dessert is crispy on the outside, and fluffy on the inside. The texture can best be described as a cookie and sponge cake hybrid. Have it served with a range of sauces and toppings such as dark chocolate or caramel sauce and whipped cream and you have a dessert that will muzzle your sweet tooth for good and yet is not off limits.

Carrot pudding

If you’re craving something sweet yet couldn’t resist a balanced diet, this is one treat that you must indulge in without worrying about your fitness needs. An awesome combination of carrots, nuts, milk, and sugar, this dessert is a mega source of beta carotene. Mimicking the butterscotch pudding, this yummy dessert tastes heavenly when served hot with condensed milk and serves best when accompanied with a cup of masala tea. Decadent, flavorful and ranking high on health index, this vegan, paleo, grain free and light dessert is exorbitantly satisfying.The golden hues of this rich, warm and nutritious dish made from baby carrots, will make your heart melt, just like that.

Rice pudding (Kheer)

Image source: ‘Rice Kheer | Indian Rice Pudding (6 ingredients, gluten-free)’ in honeywhatscooking.com on Oct. 19, 2020.

Most interesting in terms of flavors, texture and appeal, this dish only needs three simple ingredients: rice, milk, and sugar. Whole milk fares better for it renders the richest and creamiest consistency to the dessert. When flavored with additional spices, such as cardamom, rose water, saffron, and nuts, a flowery aroma and a tropical taste makes the dish mesmerizing. So, grab your spoons and dig in this yummy goodness. Served warm or cold, this deceptively delicious creamy rice kheer is easy to make and is a street side indulgence not to be missed. Go figure out for yourself and explore the lip smacking combination of simple staples that are so hard to resist!

Coconut ice cream

And who said ice creams were off limit for those on diet trip? Vegan and natural, the coconut ice cream is a hot favorite among those who wouldn’t settle for anything less than sonnets.  An ode to the toasted coconut donut hole, this tender, luscious and creamy treat with a mild tropical flavor is a scoop that any coconut lover would jump at. Your penchant for crunch could be like no other, your taste for sweetness is…awesome, but this great non dairy dessert, made simply from coconut milk, sugar and salt and served in coconut halves with toppings of peanuts and chocolate sauce, will sway you for a sugary indulgence. An incredibly tasty experience from a creation as simple as this ice cream, it is unbelievable!!

Gulab jamun

Image source: ‘Gulab jamun’ in kesarwala.in.

Soft, spongy and melt in the mouth, this dessert is made from milk solids that are reduced to the consistency of soft dough. Shaped into small balls, fried and then drenched in delicately flavored sugar syrup mixed with cardamom and rose water, it is one such street food dessert that is adored by all age groups. Garnished with nuts such as almonds and served hot, it’s a lip smacking insight to flavors of traditional cuisine every time you dig in. Just be wary of going overboard though! The calories in this dessert add up quickly so if you are watching your weight, treat yourself with only small servings at a time. Usually a gulab jamun contains about 125 calories out of which carbs comprise of 90 calories, proteins about 9 and remaining 25 calories come from fat. One single serve in fact provides about 6 % of daily calorie requirement of a standard adult diet of 2000 calories. So just watch out how much you polish off as dessert!!

Kulfi Falooda

Associated with summery climate, this refreshing treat combines thin falooda (vermicelli noodles) and kulfi, a traditional ice cream made out of slowly simmered whole milk and then flavored with pistachio and saffron. The dish is often elevated with various addons like sweet basil seeds, jelly or rose water and garnished with crushed nuts.

A treat to beat the heat, kulfi falooda ranks high on a legendary reputation due to its distinct taste, texture and richness and is among the top ten desserts on the menus of traditional street restaurants. Newer versions like mango and strawberry with a pinch of cinnamon, resemble spiced nutty custard and are similar to regular ice creams but a wee bit thicker and creamier.

So before you dive into any other crazy stuff, try this one and you won’t ever forget the heavenly taste of an unforgettable sin food!

Rasmalai

Image source: ‘ Rasmalai recipe’by Rachna’s kitchen in pinterest.com.

Melting right in the mouth, rasmalai is an explosive cheese dessert that tastes delicious, is simple. easy to make and involves a three-step process; from making chena (curded milk) discs, boiling them in sugar syrup, and then resting them in thickened milk. The secret to deliciousness lies in curdling the milk to right consistency right after it comes to a boil. This popular dessert shaves off about half the time it would take to make any other traditional dessert with similar silky texture. But no worries, your take is just as delicious with all the traditional ingredients like chena or paneer soaked in sugar, milk and spices like saffron and cardamom.

Banana cue

Image source: ‘Banana Cue’ in worldfood.guide.
 

If you’ve never before tried this one, you are in for a surprise! This popular street food dessert is pretty easy to make and will muzzle any sweet tooth! The dish derives its name from the combination of the words banana and barbecue, though bananas are neither marinated nor grilled. Their similarity in visual appeal and use of skewers to serve, is what coins that term.

Peeled bananas once deep fried until golden brown all over, are generously coated in caramelized sugar and then skewered onto a bamboo stick for ease. A hot favorite amongst street food enthusiasts, it is a portmanteau of banana and barbecue and resembles golden brown meat cooked in a style similar to Satay. (A Southeast Asian dish of seasoned, skewered and grilled meat, served with a sauce.). Sold at street stands and enjoyed as a satisfying quick afternoon snack, this delicious, must try and irresistible dessert will ring of subtle flavors through every bite!

Roti Pisang

Image source: ‘sweet roti with sweetened condensed milk on top’ in 123rf.com.

A close cut to banana cue, this traditional street sweet also makes use of bananas as the star ingredient. The unleavened roti dough is stretched until thin, and then the mix of sliced bananas, eggs and sugar is wrapped in and pan-fried until golden brown. Served cut into bite-sized pieces that are dusted with sugar and drizzled with condensed milk, it tastes heavenly and is next-gen best dessert fad. A classic street food, roti pisang is a tempting sweet and filling snack. Full of aromas, topped with pistachios or soaked in rose syrup, this traditional Malayan dessert is here to light up your taste buds if you’re looking for exotic sweets to satisfy your craving!

Candied Apples

Nothing else would catch you eye like those glossy, red and sweet candied apples, also known as jelly apples, so irresistibly displayed on street side cart and patisserie across the street. If you still remember those shining red treats in a shop window or grocery store from your childhood days, you would know how a bite into this healthy snackfeels like; perhaps the most exhilarating way to break a crunchy sugar shell coating of a nourishing snack!  Some of these attitudes might have worn off as you grew up, but surely not on the appeal of the shiny exterior and crunchy contrast of candy and apple; so irresistible and mouth watering!!

Feature credit: kitchenstories.com.

Simply dipped into a red sugar coating tempered with hot cinnamon flavor that has reached hard crack stage, you can taste and experience a fairground classic street sin food that works so well with grownups and kids alike. Every bite of candied apple is like a little party in your mouth. Wrapped in plastic and tied with a ribbon, they make a perfect take-home favors, too.

Bionico

Image source: ‘My bionico -obsessed life’ by Nathan Solis in lataco.com on Feb. 15, 2018.

A popular Mexican street fruit parfait, bionico is essentially a cocktail of a variety of fruits, chopped into small cubes, drenched with creamy sauce and then topped off with granola, pecans, raisins, shredded coconut and sometimes honey. Try it!! Visually appealing and delicious you wouldn’t think of anything more summery and tropical than a bionico tossed in a mixture of yogurt, Pina Colada smoothie (a delicious tropical treat that tastes like pineapple and coconut. Texture resembles smoothie when blended) and chia seeds. When topped with granola and coconut, this street food beats all surprises. Few even prefer the combination of condensed milk, sour cream or yoghurt, instant coffee and vanilla. A great snack, you just couldn’t get any better than this of a street side dessert!!

Seviyan

Image source: ‘Vermicelli pudding ‘ by Shazia in cookingwith shazia.com on Mar. 16, 2020.

A quick 20 minute dessert, seviyan is a perfectly creamy, delicious milk based dessert where primary ingredient is thin vermicelli; nothing like the regular one. The magic unfolds when whole milk, sugar, saffron, and roasted mixed nuts are mixed with it. Stirred well on low heat and then served once it pipes down, it turns into a delectable feast of flavors. Spices and toppings change hands as you like.

Kesari, closely resembling seviyan, is essentially lightly roasted broken vermicelli pieces that are slow cooked in milk and sugar and infused with cardamom, rose or saffron. A  kesari parfait when laced with light creamy custard and layered with crunchy almonds and chewy raisins, orchestrates a symphony of flavors once served in glass. Ask for a dollop of custard as topping and this insanely good sin food would jack up your senses roof high! 

Green Tea Honey Frozen Yogurt

Image source: ‘Paleo matcha green tea ice cream’ by Lauren Hood in pinterest.com.

If your idea of a fruit dessert is a can of packed fruits or a weary looking loaf of fruit cake, just take a moment off and think twice. Fruits are perfect in pie, work best when fresh and crunchy tucked away within layers of creamy cake or as a tasty topping on a crumb tart. And when combined with the right ingredients will satisfy any sugar fiend guilt free. Green tea honey frozen dessert is one such good bet. Easy to make, it has exactly the kind of flavor you would expect and is a tad lighter than traditional ice cream. A low key take on classic green tea matcha ice cream, this green tea and honey flavored frozen dessert is a surprisingly perfect summer treat. The honey and green tea do a great job of balancing all the flavors while the yoghurt packs a powerful protein punch that will see you through the day. 

Feature credit: kitchenstories.com.

When you want to cut down on sugar and still get your dessert fix, there’s a way to have the best of bonne bouche; from cakes and brownies to ice creams and cookies that use natural sweeteners or sugar replacements. All you need to do is believe and behave like the newlyweds for a while who do things a little differently. For once break away and think of treating yourself with the most indulgent and stunning but guilt free sweet street food and who knows this could be your special day! Don’t let those no bake no brainer organic, dairy and gluten free desserts fascinate you enough to bite let alone binge!! After all;

“Eating and living healthy is not always about punishment or sacrifice!!”