“Everyone makes mistakes, so no one person is better than the other.”
No hard guesswork; this assertion would certainly raise eyebrows. While you may get on with it, there are few who would rather mock it straightaway. And understandably so; if Abraham Lincoln or Joseph Stalin could stumble and screw up sometimes in life, clearly not all slip ups are equal.
This sounds intuitive on the surface since there is no rust colored fire escape ladder or wrought iron curly cues to help. But surprisingly there is multitude of instances where we simply miss the actual picture. Eliezer Yudkowsky- best remembered for popularizing ideas related to friendly artificial intelligence, is just as cautious when elaborating; “Everything is shades of gray, but there are shades of gray so light as to be nearly white and shades of gray so dark as to be very nearly black. Or even if not, we can still compare shades and say “it’s darker or it’s lighter”.
To me it measures the same way; like all imperfections are not equal and all uncertainties are different. While it’s not easy to embrace uncertainty, the important thing is what we choose to do with it. Who wouldn’t want to go all out to ease it, knowing that it will never be entirely gone? Except that this would determine what shade of gray you really are in as nothing is as black, white or evenly gray as you’d want it to be.
Asserting that “I don’t know a shit” or “I don’t give a damn” is something that everybody readily accepts and would easily dismiss your imperfections. But there’s a difference between someone who fails to prove why Earth is flat and someone who falls through in proving the string theory that describes the universe as made up of tiny vibrating threads. Smaller than atoms, electrons, or quarks when these strands vibrate, twist and fold, they create matter, energy, and other phenomena like electromagnetism and gravity.
In any case both would throw up their hands in uncertainty though may secretly hand on to a cocky certainty.
Image source: ‘Your silence will not protect you’ by Audre Lorde in the feministbookshop.com
For the most part we live in a world where nothing is certain; we cannot hope to be more correct –only less wrong. It’s kinda default setting where nothing is fully comprehensible. Nonetheless if you could comprehend why nothing is ever black or white, then that’s a great start. But the real shift happens only when you begin to view the world through infinite shades of color.
It’s a difficult road but promises a beautiful destination!
How strange is life, isn’t it? The darkness of the night always relents and makes way for the light of the day time after time. Likewise our endurance never fails to end our labor into fruition. It’s a blissful absurdity but is conclusive to co existing with Nature. I do not freak out easily but I know one thing for sure –there is no perfect way to live your life in a well laid down manner. Our lives are not novels that need to confine to a well defined sequence of chapters. Rather it’s a collection of stories that behold different plots unfettered- in a single you.
I have always felt fragile yet confident in my dealings. My heart could feel the pain of loss and my soul would flourish with happiness when excited. And my mind would eagerly build on rhythms of life that stir and influence my actions. Sometimes things won’t turn out the way I‘d want them to but would often end up in something more beautiful than I could have imagined.
Don’t we all shed every ounce of ourselves to grow into the kind of person that we think we are meant to be? I have always believed in all the versions of me that I’m fated to co-exist with. The most vivid part is that it has helped me to live a happy life even when wading in unknown. I have learned to live in harmony in a world that continues to evolve around me. I guess there is no single identity that I need to hang onto to be sufficient for everybody around me.
Image source: pexels.com
When I was younger I wouldn’t stop dreaming of the day when I’d be recognized as a successful writer and my stories being read somewhere one day. Years later today as I look back, I face the younger version of me that had dreamed of his work being recognized and featured. I feel warm and grateful and treasure this vision dearly. It gives me the hope and the strength to continue to desire and work hard and softly breathe my wishes to the world around me.
I am the story that has run into unfinished streams of failure, courage, hope and strength. I’m the eye that beholds infinite dreams. I’m the ambition that yearns for more and has set its heart on living on cloud nine.
Find out what bedevils your quest and learn how to get that twinkle-toed happiness back in your life.
We humans are complex life forms in a beautiful way. Put us in an intimate, passionate relationship and that seductive crush gets all hyped-up. We reckon awareness and acceptance as thumb prints and adore the quest for happiness, better still; most desirable. Perhaps spending more time with our kinds, getting a more fulfilling and secure job, or even improving our health is the reason we consider happiness a worthy pursuit. After all, being happy feels good. But do we build our lives on that reasoning alone?
Feature credits:’ Happiness with nature’ by Vigorswitch in youtube.com on Aug. 26, 2020.
Deep inside, we all treasure a fascinating tale of lifestyle and feelings, raring to be heard and appreciated. In fact, looking for an opportunity to engage and be recognized for that distinct wharf of ours, nourishes and strengthens us or at times weakens breaks or crushes us. Perhaps maximizing happiness is the only reason, we chase it. Still perceptions bump and make it so easy for us to get sad or depressed.
You think of yourself as a frightful and appalling person
We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. You may wish for a better life; maybe much better of it. But it is not always perfect for you. Sufferings turn ugly once you mentally label them as a bad situation. The emotional trauma that follows cuts you off from the vigour of life. So, once you get mired neck deep in a miserly spot that sucks, your downhill spiral begins, howsoever much you shout to the World that you are perfect and the best.
This however, doesn’t mean that you throw your hands in the air and let that moment pass by when you could reach out and grab happiness. You can still be contented and happy. Just let go of that dreary thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on. Accept yourself with utmost honesty the way you are and you will give others 10 reasons to envy you. Once the clouds of denial are gone, the magic of acceptance and contentment will unfold in your life. Just be the true rendition of self improvement and learn to love yourself.
You have sucked your soul out for long
I have a friend who never tires of talking and in most conversations he is the only one who seems to be interested in things he has to say. So, people tend to avoid his company and maybe he knows how uncomfortable sometimes it becomes. But I find him one happy person who has shaken himself awake and enthused his perspective from negative to positive outlook. Next day he could be found talking nineteen to the dozen in another gathering! I think he see the things in his life as a glass that is half full rather than half empty, and never miss out on moments that tend to make him happy.
Happy or otherwise, we all have choice as to how we spend our live. It’s our perspective that does the picking. Nothing changes for us unless we decide to take pleasure from life and live every moment as a blessing. We all know that our moods are fleeting and their causes uncertain but we also appreciate that a life spent experiencing happiness, is in some ways a good life. The concern though, is not what happiness means to you, but instead why it eluded you and how to get it.
We tend to see happiness as inconsistent to sadness or depression, suggesting that being happy means few woes and fewer regrets. If we remain contented to see the things in our life as a glass that is half empty, rather than half full, we tend to miss out on the opportunities that may be present around us. Not accepting challenges and considering them as bad consequences would never let you grow out of your miseries.
“Unhappy is he who depends on success to be happy,” Alex Dias Ribeiro.
As successful as you are or hope to be in your life and work, be sure that you will find happiness only in things that are deeply ordinary; enjoying a walk or a conversation with a loved one or plucking turnips and tomatoes from kitchen garden. For few who worship hard work or strive to outperform, this may sound like an admission of defeat. But accepting things as they happen and facing challenges head on makes you find meaning in them and move forward. So, get interested; it’s time you started living with gusto and made the most of today.
“Today is life– the only life you are sure of”.-Dale Carnegie.
You are yet to open up your mind and heart to life
Lately you have been torn up in your mind and heart. You have been questioning yourself quite uncomfortably. “Am I ill-mannered?”, “Do I always sound argumentative?”, “Do I talk too loud?”, “Does my breath smell?”, “Do I ever bore others when in company?”
Lending ears to comments and criticisms and not treating them with rejoinders like, “Don’t exaggerate! That’s just the way I am!” opens up our minds and hearts for good. It’s not how much we have in us but how much we appreciate for having it with us, rules our general state of happiness. After all life is made up of some great experiences and is a gift in our hands to nimble-toe through. Trust me; it makes the best out of inevitable for us. Each day shapes us and helps us to grow and change. So, get along, chose to be happy and live through every moment of life with grace and gratitude.
You are evasive to your ‘present’
The desire to be happy is instinctive to human nature, though it flirts and fleets. Naturally evasive, happiness is not a bad thing any more than a wine is. Both bring fun and sweetness to life when positive events like winning a lottery, promotions or even something as little as a gift from someone close to your heart, ring sweet bells in your heart or goose bumps all over.
Like it or not, being “present” for every moment shapes happiness for you. Your present is the moment where all reality is. The past is gone, the future is yet to arrive and the present is passing by. So, focus on living in and celebrating the present to the full. Live every moment of life as a blessing and you will have the greatest opportunity to experience happiness.
“When we are present and still and our minds are open, we will find that happiness is our natural state.”-Dr. Robert Puff.
The world doesn’t fall apart, every time you get hit!!
While many for us would be relieved and happy to have survived the pandemic in 2021, for others the global scourge may have caused stress meltdown and severe sufferings. The world for them would have felt like it’s upside down—literally.
We all know that anguish is an inevitable consequence of being alive. But if minimizing distress can bring happiness, it gets important to get hold of your emotional health. At least, if you can’t control it, you will always have the control over how to guard it!
Everyone experiences situations gone wrong one time or the other, but not everyone treats it in the same way. Of course, feeling stressed out sucks. It leaves you with two choices—let it suffocate you or bring the change and rewrite a new story. Remember life is a rollercoaster ride and stress will happen. So, master your sanity and good sense to ride through it. Feeling overwhelmed already? It’s time you did some soul searching and refashioned your perspective. Here are five ways to know if you do overreact to all that happens around you and wouldn’t allow yourself to manage a happy disposition.
Happiness has many faces
Our past uncannily keeps us tied down in turmoil and sadness; we are wired like that. Negativity rules over us and at times it hurts, even when you get moments of happiness in between. No denying; if you experience it, you are hanging on to the grudges and resentment of the past and could not get rid of them. Or maybe you have come up against different kinds of happiness, which do not always go together. Having too much of happiness of one sort could spoil your ability to have enough space for other. For instance, you could be butting heads how to balance career and family all together and in turn could be equally unhappy in both lives. This could be significantly damaging to yourself and those around you.
Empathy is one buzzword though, that could help. As Sadhguru puts it, “walk away from your past wiser, not wounded”. A dire need for approval in the past has left you vulnerable and your fragile self esteem is weighed down. Your chances of experiencing happiness have vanished. So, declutter your past conflicts. Stay motivated and enjoy the life to the fullest; no matter what happens-good or bad. Help yourself to grow and change and chose to be happy. Of course, you cannot forget or wipe out your gloomy past but those very crises best increase your chances of success in pursuit to happiness.
‘Happiness addict’ prefer being special over being successful
In short, keep moving with life and see it as a blessing than be damned. Enjoy it and have a whale of a time while you can. Unfortunate things happen sometimes, but so do some great things. Try not to react much to whatever is happening around you. Don’t grind yourself and be serious about how others sleep on it. You are just not being authentic or legit. Even to put on a show could ruin your chances to be happy. Live life like an adventure, Explore and plan it the way you want to. Sometimes you may even need to laugh at yourself.
Feature credits: ‘Relax with the beauty of nature’ by the Whole Happy Life in youtube.com on Mar.21,2020.
So smile as much as you can, laugh often, hang out with mates and above all just try not to be fussy or play ducks and drakes. Make the best of what you have and keep growing.
“Don’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive”-Elbert Hubbard
The Maverick#59: Inspiring and empowering, for the best is possible. 