I close my eyes for a moment when alone and try seeing the highlight reel of my life. A strange sense of serenity descends and fills me with contentment. Hard to say…is this for real? Have I found it at last? How am I to know that I ain’t at war with myself any longer and it’s the same happiness that everybody hopelessly stalks?

It’s a shame I couldn’t find honest answers then; but euphoria prevails to this day!

Some say it’s the peace of mind when you’re sheltered. For few it’s about decluttering and repairing to quickly find a new purpose. Others argue that it’s about accepting and letting go what’s baggy. My guess!… It’s what we do to stay normal in different moods to bring a desirable change; some squeaky clean happiness and peace of mind.

We all own a panic stricken mind even at the best of times. Not to say it’s a twisted temperament, but it makes people do pretty crazy things in life. I spent my early thirties clambering out of one catastrophe into another, behaving gross at times- chiding, berating and hurting others; often bad smelling with unnecessary lies! It was miserable but I wasn’t sorry for me or anybody. What the heck! This was my roost- my hallway of destruction and I loved being in it.

But there is another side to this story.

Behind all this carnage, I was a genuinely good hearted person. I always tried to be a nice somebody. Guess… it’s because I had nobody around to help me drop my snags and sorrows at dark times.

With crazy thoughts buzzing and booming in my head, I was sledged over and again by a creepy feeling- that of all the people I had hurt, it was no one more than me. I was aware that I had done enough awful things to regret later. It was like being in a kitchen with everything but no sink. I had no way to rinse off all the felony and cheating that was drowning me. More than anything, I was worried stiff that no one had the right answers that would help.

Incredibly, in the thick of all the alarms and chills unwittingly I had missed it altogether…!

It was so simple, I mean the fix! All I needed was to rearrange my headspace around few mindful things, be wary of what I decide to do every day, behave around them with integrity and try to keep my nose clean.

Not left with much choice, I went about securing my life telling myself- “If I’d manage myself with restraint, I would surely find a low-key-life free of conflicts and strife one day!”  

Today, I remember thinking how excited I was- to have chosen a way out.

Know your heartsease

For many things, peace is slippery and difficult to catch. Clock keeps ticking 24×7 and so does everyday life but peace stays distant, unless we’ve chosen to be upright in actions and follow for a turnaround.

No matter how tough things were yesterday, today I hit the sack every night with a clear conscience and a wonderful sense of calmness crooning in my ears. I have learned to live and endure. It sure did take me time and trials before I could win. It wasn’t impassable for me. Laugh, swoon, cringe or sob, it won’t be any more difficult to you trying than it was to me.

Begin by evolving a habit of sticking to “next right thing” all the time. It may be difficult at first but some legwork is way better than to drift-off not attempting anything. There’s nothing to lose and everything to gain. Still…

If you think you may fail and couldn’t help slipping back to your old ways; don’t fret! Check for these oddities to know if you haven’t wandered far off and could rally back. See which one has added to your life that you aren’t aware of.

Count on me; you’d no longer need trying if you’ve made a hit!

You endure what you can’t change

Often events change course abruptly without forewarning that we wish hadn’t. It’s like conjuring things we’ve done in the past and wish we hadn’t. And there’s little we can do to fix them except hope that some good will turn out of it. It’s only a ‘Zen’ mindset that doesn’t worry much over the past or future or to make amends.

Of course not many of us are exalted like that but if you’re busy living peacefully then most likely you’ve learned not to over think; you’re done with the past and hardly worry about the future. Bills, work, health, anything and everything, do not torment you and you think there’s hardly anything you need to change.

Great! You’re free of worries and know well that stress and worry would only disparage your wellbeing. You are clever enough to know that thoughts aren’t for real and would hate sitting on them. You prefer to move on.

You’re inclined to take things as they come

Ask anyone who’s happy and content and you’ll know why it’s Ok not to resist what persists. Unexpected happens all the time in our lives. Fireballs keep falling in our lap every so often -its life.

But not you; you’re all set and face heartbreaks head on. You are aware that inevitable is fated to happen.  So instead of struggling to fix things the way you want, you accept the way they happen knowing that this would turn out to be lot better than you’ve thought.

In all honesty, resisting change only makes it harder on us. My guess is …you’re flexible enough and would rather give way to changes.

And that’s your key to happiness.

You choose to slow down

I’d say that most of us do not enjoy our present. With wandering minds, fleeting eyes we’d reach out to our phone every few minutes in the hope of  momentary relief in busted situations. Besides with only an eye and half an ear to surroundings, it’s mostly boring and unexciting.

But you’re not a geek. You’d gladly take up pursuits that seek to slow you down, yet you’re alive to your surroundings. You’re fond of reading a book, tending front garden leaves you happy and you adore gleeful escapades in the kitchen. You revel in your mindfulness and admire arresting experiences. You enjoy talking to your friends, love long morning strolls and savor to interact around.  

Slowing down sometimes wins us a heightened awareness of the present. You’ve set clear sights on the Circle of life!

You love yourself

You’re truly at peace if you love being YOU. Not full of yourself, smug or snooty, you don’t need many heads to have a good time or to reveal your best version. You’re genuinely contented and love your company. You’re perfectly happy and fulfilled when you go to sleep. In quieter moments you long to hang around with an old friend and yearn for one-on one chat.

Still not with me? If you’re not happy with what you have and what you’d love to do to make others happy, then it’s as much of a different journey as it is for others. There’s no single right way of doing things and experiencing happiness. But if you see smile on your partners’ face each morning; yearn for a cruise to Caribbeans with Fam and every night you cuddle in the bed clean handed; honestly deep down you’re fortunate to rest in peace and rejoice at heart.

Did you catch my drift? For all I know you could be on a couch stuffing your face with potato chips, pulling apart my bag of tricks and waiting for it to happen; but if  it’s not your work, house, car, or everyday stuff that worries you- then you’ve bumped into it , unaware of your fortune.

Just stick together and … In time you’ll stand out big!