“Fat and Sassy!”…….

That’s what I’d hear every time I asked my mother how she was doing. Cringing eyes, creaking knees and despairingly loosening skin, all were a painful reminder of her advancing age. Yet I could never see any shame in her eyes in growing old or struggling with her body. At 70 you wouldn’t hope to be the same adorable pig tailed raunchy gal who would climb the trees, jump the wall or beat up all the boys.

For years I couldn’t understand why she would react like that when she could only walk gingerly and mostly not without support. She must’ve been weighing just 40 kg soaking wet at that time!

It was only long after she was gone that I could understand what she meant by saying fat and sassy! She lived and proved it in the way she carried herself, the way she spoke, the way she did everything. Hard to guess if she ever knew that she was my first truly trusted cheeky mentor. And I’m sure she never meant that being sassy a lot of time would mean being rude to people or having a nasty attitude for no reason. Of course it implied that I could do whatever I wanted but it’s not cute if I did hurt somebody.

So, instead of blending in with the crowd, I so badly wanted to stand out, much  like my Maa and instead of going with the flow, I wanted to create one and be that spicy unstoppable person in any situation.

Here are five things that have helped me shape out a long-craved oomph life for myself!

Charming and saucy! It’s a good start

There’s an abundance of info doing the rounds in blogs, podcasts, books and websites and Ted talks… still you want to be confident not cocky; honest but not hurtful and certainly cheeky but not rude. You’re always upbeat about yourself, yet know very well that you couldn’t squeeze the most out of your life in one go.

Here’s what you could do for a start!

Audacity is not disrespectful when you say something a little brash but with a smile and don’t actually mean anything by it. It’s kinda spice of attitude thrown in the mix! So next time your friend texts you, “Hey, can I come over to your place so that we could just hang around?” be wise about the man thing before responding and ask your heart, mind and soul before you reply. To say ‘No’ if that’s how it’s meant to be, need not sound impolite or rude.

It’s time to start living your best

If there is one thing that’s true for all sassy people, it’s that they come packed with exuberance, wisdom for handling real-life situations and are full of insights about living life to the fullest.

Look…It does take some confidence and gusto to do your things the way you like them, to love yourself and to speak up your mind. Because you’re freaking cool, being confident isn’t much of a challenge to you. However, if you couldn’t handle and allow your inner sass out, make it easy by starting from the outside in. True, confidence comes from within, but a little can seep in from the outside as well.

So, get dressed up, start feeling good on the outside and behave and act like a confident you would. Shoulders back, head held high as you walk, a little flirt, an eye roll, a small touch perhaps or a faint smile and you’ll find your body language channeling your sass in no time. But keep it to a minimum since that stuff gets negative pretty easily. There will always be people who are easily offended and will think of you as rude.

Fun doesn’t hurt anybody

If being brassy, bold and adorable is a lot about having fun, why shouldn’t you have some? Once your confidence turns high and races heavenwards it’s highly unlikely that you would slink out of the fun and romp that comes your way. Simply try being the person who loves being bouncy and peppy. If you’re listless, uninterested in people around you or hard to enthuse, your charming cockiness could easily be mistaken for cynicism.

Seriously, be the person who can have fun with anything, anywhere. A pep in your step would keep your sassiness (with a smile of course) upright and would make others find you funny and enviable.

So stop slouching over the phone and no more day dreaming or glazed-over cold looks. Get in the moment. Look around you. Respond with a smile or a nod when people talk to you. Ask, inquire, crack jokes or flirt a little for all I care.  But live the moment for every time it’s a show time!

Your X-factor will help you smile!

Living fat and sassy never cheats you of following your passions and loving your family. Being alive purposefully and genuinely instead earns you some kindness and urges you to stay connected.

Do you know of people who mystically stay ‘invisible’? They would walk into the room and nobody would notice, hang around and will barely make a sound. And that’s that. Nobody checks out on them; nobody sits up for them. In fact, there is something about their unwillingness to try that makes them cower or cringe among people who are dynamic and metallic. Instead of challenging their fears, they find comfort in shutting out than shine brighter.

Believe me, slinking would never let you speak up your mind or zero-in and build up on your confidence.

But that’s not you. You’d die doing anything to live large. Won’t you? You love to crack jokes, tell stories and wouldn’t hesitate to showcase that spilled coffee stained shirt, modeling it and thumping around; ‘stains are the rocking rage’! For you being sassy is something about making everybody take notice.

And that’s Ok! No need to shy away if all eyes are on you. The best part is that your bouncy breeziness will keep the party going. See…not everybody can do that. Just be the person that can have fun with anyone, anything… anywhere.

You could be a surprise trendsetter

Don’t be surprised if everybody around you starts doing Muay Thai or sashay around like BoyWithUke– that smashing net influencer. Sassies are effervescent and would find humor in just about anything. There’s nothing they are unwilling to try.

So let your personality run riot. Public speaking, heights or slugs, even challenging yourself will be just as fine in surprising others as your kinky yoga postures! Simply tame your hardwired wits to listen to you. It’s the willingness to jump outside the box and do what others are often afraid to do, will make you bolder and shine brighter.

Besides, can you imagine of yourself as wise and sassy in a walrus outfit?

Interestingly, aware or not most people experience sweeping range of emotions each day and unfortunately most of these are unpleasant and sometimes awfully harsh. Irksome as they are, each one of us easily gets tired of sulking in a bad mood all day long and want the physical sensation to be exciting and stirring. Besides what’s the fun in being nice and shy all the time?  Saucy, vivacious and bold wouldn’t we all want to have these enviable qualities and not just tow the lamb’s tail?

And just for the record, don’t worry what others would think. Living life your way comes free!!