Tag Archives: #Learning

Wishing for a brighter side? Five promising ways to make yourself irresistibly attractive !!

Everything has attraction but not everyone sees it’.

Image source: ‘What makes someone naturally beautiful?’ in naturaluniversalsecrets.com

I wonder how good is that when people’s preference for faces changes remarkably every time they run into one?

For most part we could do little to change how we look but isn’t smelling good, being funny or not talking about your ex strongly influences your uniqueness?

I’m no Dale Carnegie or a big thumping philanthrop like Oprah. But I’ve learned a thing or two about how to draw the world around me; how to work with it than around it.

Having wrinkles or two is not a sign of horror; it’s a sign of experience, of weariness and above all your love for life. It means you’re trying to be the best person you can be; you’re trying to keep the twinkle in your eyes because you want to be happy. And you smile brightly because you know that makes you overwhelmingly attractive!!

Still, if you think that attraction is just a word and couldn’t define who you are; here’re some ways to make people love the freckles on your face.

Smile to win over!

Smile is one big way stir up things. It’s one damn good way to make others find you appealing and attractive. It hints at friendliness and receptivity. Smiling and laughing is cool; it not only makes you more attractive but it makes you feel more attractive. And doing so you, lets you experience joy and happiness even when things don’t seem to be going well.

A smile speaks of its own and works like some rustic aphrodisiac that could pull even the ever-serious counterparts towards you. Sad wry faces feel dismissive and cruel.

Imagine if you could pair a face with something positive and beautiful; that face would then begin to look more attractive. A beaming mug is way different from sad sullen ones that crowd around you every day and is the obvious choice to be judged as more attractive!

Look…

Who you find attractive is less about where you grew up or where you ran around in life. Your choice is more influenced by experiencing the pull that is so unique when you look at  a simple, coy and  pleasantly bright face.

Image source: ‘freepick.com’.

Air of excitement around you!

Let it happen! Sometimes it helps build ridiculous amount of attraction!!

People generally love being accepted and feel comfortable when that happens but not unless you make their interests important to you just as much you want them to as well. If you want others to like you, let your gestures build up some comfort.

Your friends may know who you are but others judge you only by your looks and how you connect with them. More than anything your body stance, attitude and the eagerness to open up when you bump into some stranger; that’s what make people find you attractive.

I am flattered when somebody I happen to meet first time, gets curious about my life or my hobbies. I’m sure, that someone also expects to be enquired. And that’s Ok…I think that if you could find the right stuff to make a heart flutter, the allure will rake up a warm companionship all by itself.

Truth is that every one of us on this planet believes that we know something that the other doesn’t. And we would rather die trying to learn something new. If you believe that everything happens for a reason; create your own style and share the excitement of togetherness. No matter what, how you feel is more important than how you look! Heads will turn, once you begin to get comfortable in your skin.

It’s not long before people will recognize you as an attractive and fantastic person.

 Monday blues are bad!

Negative side of everything is unpleasant. People with a peppy attitude, on the other hand bring encouraging changes in everybody’s lives, help avoid worries, see the brighter side of everything and expect the best to happen. Just living their lives and doing things they love most is what makes them attractive.

Could you think of the times when someone has been unexpectedly friendly and nice to you? Is it the person who smiled at you while you went strolling in the park? Maybe it’s only a cheerful good morning’; nothing was said at first. Maybe it’s the person who picked up a conversation with you first time and bowled you over with an unexpected compliment. Believe me, these are the kind of thoughts that never leave us. Whenever roused, they make our day feel a little better.

These small positive actions get people innately attracted to and want that someone to be around when everything goes gross.

Geez…do we need to be happy all the times? Surely that’s not possible. We all have our moments of sadness, loss, anger and hardships. And yet we know how to combat loneliness and stay snug in life.

So, just stay cool, keep telling yourself that you can do whatever it takes to be happy and let the life happen. You’ll wake up each morning knowing that you deserve the awesome life you’re living.

Trust me…

People get attracted to you, feel connected to and remember you as a fair deal only when you don’t act silly goose, are unassuming and not always cooked up to look unmistakably attractive.   

Image source: pexels.com.

Learning is wonderful

Going back to University, sweating out over some online course or catching up a seminar? If you are looking to fit into at least one of them, then learning is your one way ticket to stay relevant everywhere you go. It helps you understand how the world works. It helps you to realize your passion, boost creativity and live a better life. The benefits are simply enormous.

Sometimes we find ourselves troubled in an intense impassioned life circles where perceptions keep changing. And so do our imperfections. The painful truth is that knowing backwards sometimes feels far less important and we usually junk the very idea of learning something new!

This is where the pit gets deeper… Feeling gutted makes it worse.

For people whom we find attractive, learning is something that’s endless. They take the time to be savvy and admit when they don’t have an answer, but work around to find one. Wary and unsure, not many of us have the heart to rise and take the same first step.

For times when you couldn’t see the whole staircase and burn yourself too much over ‘I think I can or think I can’t’; it’s best to take a step back and sell yourself this story…

“Attraction is a funny thing. It never resists change. And it never lets you go dark either.”

Learning and knowing better would nudge more and more people towards you.

You’re never too good!

It’s a mean old world where life follows one single rule. If you want to succeed and be a happy attraction to others, don’t take yourself too seriously. Stop believing that everything revolves around you. In fact, there’s a good chance that when you’re gone, you’ll be completely forgotten in no time. There’s always somebody to take your place.

I find perfectionism as the enemy of change. It never lets us rest or to have fun and be happy wanting to do everything our way. We fear that one single mistake would ruin everything we’ve build for so long. It’s a delusion that wouldn’t let us be a messy imperfect and perhaps a happy person!

Image source: ‘freepik.com‘.

Sometimes I also get comfortable being uncomfortable. I love my perfectly imperfect moments. But that’s my burden and I’ve learned to take it seriously, not myself. I think being attractive is just a matter of being confident in your skin and loving the way you look like.

So, stop being a perfect student, perfect employee, perfect son, perfect sister, perfect…??.

Do your stuff with an abandon and people with a sense of light heartedness will find you attractive for sure!!

Seven ever lasting habits that could help you win Friends and influence People !!

“Each one of us makes his own weather, determines the color of the skies in the emotional universe which he inhabits “.    -Fulton J. Sheen

You could be really good in your work and yet marvel at the ease with which your Boss sums up the day with a flourish. But when have you ever been just what you loved in the first place? You are merely defined by your roles. Your desire to be more than a performer and be a McCoy in ‘fit all’ roles is a moot point of social absurdity in your everyday life.

So!…ever wondered what allows him to achieve so much with so little efforts?

Like the top of the tree, it is our personality that people see first. Of course image, skill, and techniques carry their influence, but the real source of lasting effectiveness lies in strong character, the roots.

These timeless insights hold the key to most of our personal and professional life issues and could well change the way you may be interpreting success.

Everything begins with an end in sight

Would you tell me please which way I ought to go from here?” .“That depends a good deal on where you want to get to” said the Cat… “I don’t much care where…” said Alice…“Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,” said the Cat. From Alice in Wonderland

Living by the design of things is the first step to a private victory. A clear vision of what you want and for what purpose, decides what is and what is not important for you in the day. Once this becomes visible you can create a personal mission and live by it for improved outcomes.

Always remember that mental creation always precedes physical creation. Once you begin to visualize the outcome in every area of life before you act, your blueprint to success starts taking shape. Your vision becomes your guide for day to day decisions.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

When this happens, it’s time to reshape your future. But just don’t let others do it for you or even circumstances decide for you. What more turn a blind eye to the wisdom of others. Consider it only as a temporary restraint , no more.

Be responsible for your choices for you chose wisely

“When we can no longer change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves. –Viktor Frankl

For the third time this week, your company is rumored to be undertaking restructuring, for Covid crises have hit its anchors hard. You feel threatened and might even believe it to be true. You are aware that the finance department is searching for ways to latch on the expenses and save on company’s dwindling resources.

Lately you have suffered a bout of anxiety and have started feeling the scrutiny of the management. Recent failures stem from obvious reasons but the management has so conveniently begun to blame you and hold you squarely for dips in performance. Every day in Office you could feel your Boss staring at you across the floor with utter disdain in his eyes boring down your neck. You are damn sure that your impunity is short lived.

You believe that you have contributed significantly over the past seven years but you are not certain that the management is even aware of your value addition to the company. You and your team had worked so hard to develop good relations both in- house and with businesses but seems like everybody is turning a blind eye to your sweat.  Your department is slated to be downsized and you may be fired.

The first thought that will cross your mind is, what has conspired against me? Am I merely a victim of circumstances? or have I not made my choice wisely?

It’s not unnatural to defy the habit of choice. Most of us do not allow ourselves the freedom to choose between choices and rather resign to turn of events and circumstances.

So what could you do to un-ruffle the wet feathers? I would say you hit the pause, mull over it and then react proactively.  Think of what all lies all beyond your present. Start choosing between the options if you think you cannot salvage anything from this unworthy situation. Focus on what lies ahead than stay fixed with your present misadventure. Whatever you do, just be compelling in your choices and actions.

In any case your dependence on this job is no more than a private victory’ bereft of any synergy with your capabilities. Shed your loneliness and learn to expand your circle of influence. Be more aware of yourself and become a transition person. Your ‘interdependence’ shall change hands with independence ‘in no time and creativity shall take hold of your life for good.

One thumb rule that you should never let go is  learn to be yourself and focus on things you can influence. Only then you can expand your knowledge, experience, trustworthiness and above all your circle of influence.

First things always come First

“Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least”.  – Johann Goethe.

Prioritization of things has an unmistakable reputation of giving better results and fewer hiccups. Focus on things that are important and urgent first and put the unimportant ones at the back of the shelf, although you have to deal with them anyhow.  

This rule defies all logic, for you may be required to multitask and deliver altogether, but remember, it is the compass that must always come before the clock because  where you are headed is more important than how fast you are getting there. So always live North of the line and remember what is urgent need not always be important. Needless interruptions, unnecessary reports, meetings, phone calls, mails may be urgent but not important. Crisis, pressing problems, deadline driven projects, meetings reports override all other priorities and come first above all. Likewise issues like preparation, planning, recreation, relationship building is important but not urgent. Trust me, effectiveness stems from your integrity once you begin to act on your priorities.

Image source: Photo by Elias de Carvalho on Pexels.com

Fall for the habit of mutual benefit : Its intoxicating to think win-win

“What do we live for if not to make life less difficult for each other “.– George Eliot

Effective long term relationships thrive only on mutual respect and benefits. Foster them. Strike rich relationships . Work on the belief that there is plenty out there and more to spare. Once you have struck a balance between courage and consideration, your win-win systems have already been built with faster solutions to problems. Workaround for a solution that works good for both rather than look for success expending and excluding others.

Believe me, these win-win frameworks work great when you are clear and vocal in your expectations, eager to delegate responsibilities and ready to work with conflicting priorities.

Photo by Vlad Cheu021ban on Pexels.com

Learn to understand to be understood

“Listen or your tongue will make you deaf”     – Unknown

To communicate and understand each other, you must learn to listen, for listening empathically is your first step towards influencing others.

Most of us do not spare necessary time and effort to properly diagnose the symptoms and rush to prescribe solutions. We assume that we have understood the issue well and hasten with a quick advice. This usually falls flat for we communicate from our own frame of reference. This is nothing unusual for we all are blessed naturally with this gift of communicating. We advise, probe, interpret and evaluate based on our own experiences and motives. We communicate merely our likes and dislikes. So what happens is that we feel we do not understand and likewise the other person doesn’t feel understood. This contemptuous disregard for each other’s ideas, priorities, intent and  an overwhelming urge to prevail upon, will fail you to ‘hit the brief’ every time you turn vocal .

The key to this mutual miscommunication lies within you only. Give a patient hearing to what others have to say and you will find that you are more likely to get the results you want than ever.

Solutions to complex problems have their roots in clarity on real issue. And what more once you learn to listen you can always teach to learn.

The whole is greater than the sum of its parts

“The enemy of the best is the good”.            -Voltaire

People are often overwhelmed by the difference of opinion, perspective and the background of the issue. Rummaging through umpteen courses of actions is merely confusing and often let you down.

One way to swim out of this cesspool of uncertainty is to identify the common purpose, look around you, search and learn the differences. Once you have done so, rewire your mindset. Celebrate these differences rather than tolerate or even accept them and you could well be rewarding yourself with the third alternative “Our Way”. Once you get rid of first two choices-‘my way’, ‘your way’; you are more likely to end up with an idea that is better than what you started with.

And when would you know that you have created a third alternative? You will get to know this; when you have a change of heart, see things differently and begin to find a new way together. For once, fall in for the habit of creative cooperation and see amazing things begin to happen.

Use a benchmark to check your effectiveness

“To keep the lamp burning, we have to keep putting oil in it.” – Mother Teresa.

Focusing only on getting the golden eggs has always been a lot more ineffective than nurturing the goose that lays them.

While we learn to renew ourselves regularly we often encounter mental obstacles such as feeling too busy, lack of enough self discipline to stick to our commitments. These are harassing moments and need you to be strong. Even your petty chores like mind over mattress’ (getting up in time), eating healthy or sticking to reading regimen even when you are busy will sharpen the habit of renewal.

In turn you will have an insight of your effectiveness from your point of view as well as from the viewpoint of those around you. Better still set up a benchmark to see if your capacity has improved, relationships have bettered and there is continuous improvement in your productivity. As you explore you will become more aware of your level of effectiveness.

Once you recognize how you want to see yourself and how others see you, things will turn easier and your ‘Private victory’ will morph into a ‘Public victory’. Things once familiar and boring will for a change start looking amazing and may even reveal the real McCoy in you.